Wedding Attendance poll

sucrets4 · May 2010

Who even notices this on their wedding day?

I was kinda focused on getting married and not taking attendance of ceremony guests.

Calumet · May 2010

haha! No I only noticed and started this poll, because we did a receiving line directly after the wedding. It was really awesome to be able to greet/see/thank all of our guests right away, later we did table visits. It was apparent the people who I thought had missed the day, but then found at the reception. A few of them had gotten lost, and one I knew about ahead of time - extenuating circumstances. But there were a few others, and when looking back on it later, it hurt my feelings a bit. Not like I would let anything like this ruin the memory of my wedding day, that would be beyond silly.

But I was really trying to understand why people do it, because I can't stop it from sort of skewing the way I feel about those people. One of them skipped on purpose. My feelings are perhaps immature, but sometimes you feel the way you do. I guess if you come from a group of people who regularly skips ceremonies, it might just seem normal, not like you were skipping the entire point of the day - which is how it felt to me. In my mind, we invited these people to our wedding not a party. Though I worked very hard to make the party have as fun as possible to thank all of our friends and family for sharing the day with us.

Sunny0710 · May 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_wedding-attendance-poll?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:adb8ce09-86cc-4375-9aad-90ac085acbb1Post:3c5b0647-fc5b-4773-a03c-826231ab172c">Re: Wedding Attendance poll</a>:
[QUOTE]we've skipped a ceremony before, although I will admit that yall won't like the reasoning. my fiance and I are REALLY into college football, it's practically a religion with us. a friend of ours had her wedding during a game. we skipped the ceremony to watch the first half. then FI watched the second half on the phone at the reception. the only reason I was able to even get him to attend the reception was because he needed to at least put in an appearance since this was our friend getting married, and several other friends were in attendance. however, I know that there will be several occasions where I myself will have to skip the ceremony in favor of the later reception, and that will be because of my work schedule.
Posted by pooh8402[/QUOTE]

I think this is incredibly rude. Your FI could not put football on hold (or record it, at least?) for one afternoon to watch his friend celebrate this milestone? And then, to make it even worse, you show up to enjoy the free meal and drinks while watching the game on a cell? I would be horribly offended.

mica178 · May 2010

I have always attended both or neither. If I had to choose one part, it'd be the ceremony because without the ceremony, there wouldn't be a reception, and the point of the whole day is the actual marriage. I also think that if I had to skip the ceremony, the least I could do is contact the bride or groom and explain why I wasn't there but that I would be going to the reception.

No, of course I wouldn't be taking attendance during the ceremony, so I probably won't notice if some people skip that part. But theoretically, I would find it rude if people couldn't be bothered by the ceremony but still wanted a free meal.

jayjoe · May 2010

i put yes. An example would be friday weddings. I only get 3 weeks vacation a year so unless im thisclose to you, i'm sorry, but i'm not losing a day or half day for your 3pm wedding. Also, if there is a gap and the church is far away from me. For instance, my cousin is getting married in an area that is 30 minutes from house and requires $11 to get over the bridge. The reception is in New Jersey about an hour and half from me. I'm not spending $22 to go there and come back or go there and hang around for 2 hours with nothing to do.

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