AYG

Anysunrise · November 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_ayg-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:6f1d5c6f-124c-4e95-9258-e2382a10c3edPost:a829c202-7d8e-4cfa-b167-f379afb8759c">Re: AYG</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: AYG : Just because it wouldn't affect YOUR comfort as a guest doens't mean it doesn't affect other people's comfort. <strong>And did OP ever say she was going to come clean about it?</strong> I don't remember, but I got the vibe that she was going to not tell anyone. Either way, it's not really about etiqette for me. It's about being a goddamned adult and making tough decisions. It's about this insane sense of entitlement to a big dumb party that brides get. As far as I'm concerned, your JOP wedding is your wedding and I don't care to participate in a vow renewal as a guest. At all. Period. Ever. I hate them.
Posted by laurenclaire1386[/QUOTE]

I'm not sure if she specifically said it, but one of her questions was if people told other people about it when they did it and if so, who. So I guess she was kind of asking if she should?

J&K10910 · November 2010

Jiggle Muffins?

And does no one spell it "Dilemna" anymore?

JenGin74 · November 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_ayg-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:6f1d5c6f-124c-4e95-9258-e2382a10c3edPost:f12ad757-7964-4eb4-9c51-c84350d3e86e">Re: AYG</a>:
[QUOTE]I am sad to ditto the Mocha flame, because I really like her. I was also surprised that she asked about that in that thread. Time and a place, you know? JenGin's reveal about Jessandtrav's dad in that thread last weekend didn't sit right wtih me for two reasons: 1) I feel like she was trying to make Meg look like a diick, when anyone who knows Meg also knows she would never have made a snide remark about Jess had she known what was up, and 2) Jess specifically hadn't mentioned her dad on here, which I noticed and respected. I just feel like that's something you shouldn't disclose about someone else on this board on their behalf. ETA: I knew about Jess' dad from FB, so I'll ditto Missy's grievance about this. Thanks for the tie-in!
Posted by beatlesgirl25[/QUOTE]

My bad. I can see how that was a diick move on my part, although it wasn't intended like that. M&M (hopefully) knows I love her lots.

Edit: It also just now dawned on me that that was FB specific info. I didn't think before posting.

maratea · November 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_ayg-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:6f1d5c6f-124c-4e95-9258-e2382a10c3edPost:037c78dc-7054-4714-bbaa-b4d15e49e7bb">Re: AYG</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: AYG : I've actually never complained about it being too nice.
Posted by TheCranberry[/QUOTE]

I wasn't referring to you about that. I think it was in last week's AYG. Cew is the first who comes to mind. I'm not flaming anyone and since your grievance took place on the ceremony board, I guess it's not an issue on SB then... ? Though I do think people are kind of being nice lately.

zippityb · November 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_ayg-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:6f1d5c6f-124c-4e95-9258-e2382a10c3edPost:35323802-9850-40ec-a426-fea248450437">Re: AYG</a>:
[QUOTE]Jiggle Muffins? And does no one spell it "Dilemna" anymore?
Posted by J&K10910[/QUOTE]

I like to spell it Dillama.

MeaghanandMichael · November 2010

Yeah I am blanking on who else said something that irked me in the Sash thread.

Nates I agree with your assessment of rxjen. Plus, her run on sentences kill my brain. Then, when she finally does start a new sentence, the "i'" is not in caps. I am not usually a stickler for this stuff, but it sure made me batty yesterday.

PSA: I feel terrible about what I said about Jess in that thread under the circumstances. Perhaps one of the reasons I didn't get along with her recently was because she had a lot of stress in her life. I apologize for being crass... I just had no idea.

TheCranberry · November 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_ayg-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:6f1d5c6f-124c-4e95-9258-e2382a10c3edPost:a829c202-7d8e-4cfa-b167-f379afb8759c">Re: AYG</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: AYG : Just because it wouldn't affect YOUR comfort as a guest doens't mean it doesn't affect other people's comfort. And did OP ever say she was going to come clean about it? I don't remember, but I got the vibe that she was going to not tell anyone. Either way, it's not really about etiqette for me. It's about being a goddamned adult and making tough decisions. It's about this insane sense of entitlement to a big dumb party that brides get. As far as I'm concerned, your JOP wedding is your wedding and I don't care to participate in a vow renewal as a guest. At all. Period. Ever. I hate them.
Posted by laurenclaire1386[/QUOTE]

I thought she was planning to tell people what they were doing, but I don't remember. I agree with you that the JOP wedding is the wedding, but I don't mind if people have their celebration day later as long as they don't lie because I hate liars. I realize this is a contrary view here.

jasmineh7777 · November 2010

I'm pretty "meh" about vow renewals. I mean, if you tell me it's a vow renewal, then awesome. If we're close enough that you'd invite me, then I probably do want to see your vow renewal.
Lying about a vow renewal is a seperate issue in my mind. Sometimes circumstances require people to get legally married quickly. But I think there is something special about making a promise in front of all of your friends and family. And? If my friend did have a vow renewal, I'd probably want to see her in her dress too.
*ducks*

MeaghanandMichael · November 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_ayg-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:6f1d5c6f-124c-4e95-9258-e2382a10c3edPost:f4568495-692e-40ba-b5a1-59876b3e8f91">Re: AYG</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: AYG : My bad. I can see how that was a diick move on my part, although it wasn't intended like that. M&M (hopefully) knows I love her lots.
Posted by JenGin74[/QUOTE]

Yeah I was a bit surprised by that, but then again, I looked like a diick too. Thanks Mon for clearing the air. Hug it out bitch?

betrothed123 · November 2010

I'll go ahead and ditto Missy and Beatles on the FB sharing on the knot, but I also want to turn it around (I won't name names because that goes against what I just said). I hate logging into FB and seeing a bunch of knotties bitching about other knotties on their walls. This especially annoys me when it's someone who's always pushing people to be nice here.

beatlesgirl25 · November 2010

Jiggle Muffins used to be my stripper name, and now it's tainted. Back to the drawing board...

Jen, I'm glad to hear you didn't mean any harm. Misunderstanding on my part then.

JenGin74 · November 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_ayg-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:6f1d5c6f-124c-4e95-9258-e2382a10c3edPost:09f1ec5e-01c4-4a31-a736-bf32f3b3d799">Re: AYG</a>:
[QUOTE]Yeah I am blanking on who else said something that irked me in the Sash thread. Nates I agree with your assessment of rxjen. Plus, her run on sentences kill my brain. Then, when she finally does start a new sentence, the "i'" is not in caps. I am not usually a stickler for this stuff, but it sure made me batty yesterday. <strong>PSA: I feel terrible about what I said about Jess in that thread under the circumstances. Perhaps one of the reasons I didn't get along with her recently was because she had a lot of stress in her life. I apologize for being crass... I just had no idea.</strong>
Posted by MeaghanandMichael[/QUOTE]

Don't feel bad. There's no way you could've known. I'm the asshole in this situation.

MeaghanandMichael · November 2010

I wish I didn't find out about GBCKs on fb. But, that is probably my own problem.

laurenclaire1386 · November 2010

I realize my opinion on vow renewals is pretty extreme, so I certainly don't expect anyone to agree with me. The whole concept is just icky to me. It's a wedding do over. Like I said, it's about tough decisions. Which is more important? Being married now, or having all your friends and family there? I'm firmly in the pick one, not both category.

jasmineh7777 · November 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_ayg-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:6f1d5c6f-124c-4e95-9258-e2382a10c3edPost:3ecd31b2-077b-4407-85be-5b9bce085c57">Re: AYG</a>:
[QUOTE]I wish I didn't find out about GBCKs on fb. But, that is probably my own problem.
Posted by MeaghanandMichael[/QUOTE]

Ditto.

And if I posted about TK on my wall, my other friends would have no idea what I was talking about.

K Byte · November 2010

I don't care if someone has a "vow renewal" either as long as they're up-front with their guests and their families about it. I agree, if it was a close friend or family member I'd want to be able to witness their vows and all that. I guess that's the unpopular opinion now but weren't there people on here (as in TK in general not just SB) who have had legal weddings and then vow renewals months later and it was ok? I'm totally blanking on who but I'm almost positive people have done it and not been completely shat on by everyone.

missy68 · November 2010

Why do people get worked up enough about not getting a thank you note that they want to ask the bride about it? If you know the gift was received, then you know the bride is either slow, or doesn't know what to do properly.

I don't understand why people advise others to ask at the 2 month mark, unless they have no idea whether or not the gift was received.

I DO get being pissed about it; we gave a gift to one of J's coworkers last July, for a wedding we never got an invitation to (but were "supposed" to), and have never received a thank you. My parents have given checks for wedding and babies, and never gotten thank yous for either (and it was my dad's boss' daughter). But they know she got it, because the check went through.

allisong23 · November 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_ayg-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:6f1d5c6f-124c-4e95-9258-e2382a10c3edPost:6b27f469-e0b3-4be8-bdc6-d132a791718a">Re: AYG</a>:
[QUOTE]I realize my opinion on vow renewals is pretty extreme, so I certainly don't expect anyone to agree with me. The whole concept is just icky to me. It's a wedding do over. Like I said, it's about tough decisions. Which is more important? Being married now, or having all your friends and family there? I'm firmly in the pick one, not both category.
Posted by laurenclaire1386[/QUOTE]

I can see doing it to celebrate a milestone (10 years, 25 years), but having a vow renewal a few weeks after you JOPed just to have a party is sketchy sketch.

jasmineh7777 · November 2010

My opinion on the vow renewal thing is partially influenced by my religion too. I could have gone to the courthouse, but my Church wouldn't have recognized me as married, cuz they're jerks like that.

Andplusalso, I've only been invited to weddings of close friends. So I'm aware of the circumstances, and I already like them.

amylydia23 · November 2010

I guess I will just flame myself then... My wedding was a small JOP ceremony and we sent out a marriage announcement. We are doing the vow renewal/religious ceremony and reception in August.

amylydia23 · November 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_ayg-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:6f1d5c6f-124c-4e95-9258-e2382a10c3edPost:640bb108-49f5-4dce-81c1-92550e9d4eb4">Re: AYG</a>:
[QUOTE]For people who do a JOP with a later vow renewal for religious purposes, which date do you celebrate as your anniversary?
Posted by TheCranberry[/QUOTE]
I consider our JOP ceremony our wedding anniversary and always will.

laurenclaire1386 · November 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_ayg-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:6f1d5c6f-124c-4e95-9258-e2382a10c3edPost:031cb2f6-e3f6-4c85-b867-2d46b45cf5cb">Re: AYG</a>:
[QUOTE]What are the consequences of a church not recognizing one's marriage?
Posted by zippityb[/QUOTE]
Uh, nothing. I'm assuming people do it out of religious conviction. But there's not the first consequence I can come up with outside of a religious one.

J&K10910 · November 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_ayg-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:6f1d5c6f-124c-4e95-9258-e2382a10c3edPost:031cb2f6-e3f6-4c85-b867-2d46b45cf5cb">Re: AYG</a>:
[QUOTE]What are the consequences of a church not recognizing one's marriage?
Posted by zippityb[/QUOTE]

Straight to hell with the both of ya.

allisong23 · November 2010

When my cousin got married a year and a half ago, between my parents, my sister and I we spent close to $750 on wedding gifts. None of us got thank yous (and asking around the family, no one else did as well). It pisses us off to this day. None of us could go to the wedding, but at least acknowledge our gifts.

The same cousin & his wife promised they would come to our wedding. When we didn't get a RSVP, my mom called my aunt. She said sheepishly that none of them were coming. The next day I got an invite to cousin's baby shower - for the day after my wedding 5 hours away. Really? They got no gift.

jasmineh7777 · November 2010

Zip- Technically, I'd still be living in sin if I didn't get married within the Church.
If we wanted kids (shudder) they would be considered to be out-of-wedlock. And, if I ever got divorced, I couldn't get an annulment.
Worst of all, they'd take away my birthday.

ETA- Yes, the consequences are all religious. Sinners in the hands of an angry God, and all that jazz.

Anysunrise · November 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_ayg-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:6f1d5c6f-124c-4e95-9258-e2382a10c3edPost:f808eae7-85bc-4072-949f-27025aefa8af">Re: AYG</a>:
[QUOTE]I don't care if someone has a "vow renewal" either as long as they're up-front with their guests and their families about it. I agree, if it was a close friend or family member I'd want to be able to witness their vows and all that. I guess that's the unpopular opinion now but weren't there people on here (as in TK in general not just SB) who have had legal weddings and then vow renewals months later and it was ok? I'm totally blanking on who but I'm almost positive people have done it and not been completely shat on by everyone.
Posted by K Byte[/QUOTE]

Well, I dunno about other people, but as is obvious by anyone who read that thread, I'm doing it. It's mostly at my family's behest anyways. I don't want to spend another 6 months away from my FI, and they don't want to miss my wedding. I'm the first of this generation in my family to get married. I'm not going to tell them "Sorry, people on the internet say we can't do it, so tough sh*t. Give it another 10 years for my cousin to get hitched". And 5 billion other reasons. It's just easier. Everyone knows, and no one cares, thus, I don't care.

MeaghanandMichael · November 2010

Kat Eyes is a PW. I know this term is pretty fast and loose, but I stand by it.

Also, flame me to high hell for having no sense of humor, but I did not find her joke about being a drug mule funny in any way shape or form - especially when you consider the delivery.

beatlesgirl25 · November 2010

I'm of the "as long as I know it's a vow renewal and you're not lying to anyone about it, I don't care and will probably attend" camp, as far as vow renewals go.

laurenclaire1386 · November 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_ayg-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:6f1d5c6f-124c-4e95-9258-e2382a10c3edPost:6891c3bc-8740-47e1-a51f-eaa8dbeecb33">Re: AYG</a>:
[QUOTE]Zip- Technically, I'd still be living in sin if I didn't get married within the Church. If we wanted kids (shudder) they would be considered to be out-of-wedlock. And, if I ever got divorced, I couldn't get an annulment. Worst of all, they'd take away my birthday.
Posted by jasmineh7777[/QUOTE]
But technically, if they never validated the marriage in the first place, splitting with your H couldn't be considered a divorce, right? Because you were never really married in the church's eyes?

Nebb · November 2010

So really this is just a discussion about vow renewals...?

AYG

Re: AYG

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