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Hello, Wife in Training!

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Re: Hello, Wife in Training!

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    In Response to Re: Hello, Wife in Training!:
    [QUOTE]Aside from all that's being said back and forth in here.  YOU mentioned that talk of marriage scares you.  You then are on a good track, talk of getting married after 6 months of dating should make you feel a bit wary, especially if he's been married before.  Don't be a wife in training, be a GIRLFRIEND.  Also tell him that you're uncomfortable with the marriage talk and to just enjoy your relationship AS IS!  Now lets get to know you better. 
    Posted by motoLyn[/QUOTE]


    slow clap


    OP, I know you meant it to be cute, but your post title was really off-putting. Also, your responses have been rather short and devoid of information that would help us provide useful advice.
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    motoLynmotoLyn member
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    In Response to Re: Hello, Wife in Training!:
    [QUOTE]You people are treating this like one big joke or troll session when clearly it's not
    Posted by soupmikesgirl[/QUOTE]

    I'll be honest the first time I read your post I thought it was made up because ONE I could barely make out what it was that you wanted to convey or ask us about and TWO seriously with a post title like yours it was inviting "hot" thread to happen.  But I gave you the benefit of the doubt. 

    Now we as an online board can't take you seriously if you can't address some questions with details.  All I know is...
    -you are 29
    -dating a guy for almost 6 months
    -he works at a Christian camp
    -that BF wants to get married within a short time frame

    So what is a short time frame?  Also I just want to tell you, posters who come in and spout about being in love and wanting to marry someone after just knowing them for months get the side eye from a majority of people.  "When you know you just know" or "Love at first sight" is all fine and dandy for the movies, but here in reality its a harsher world. 

    So was the point of your post to just announce to us a room of strangers that you're in love with a man you met 6 months ago?  How did you two meet?
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    In Response to Re: Hello, Wife in Training!:
    [QUOTE]We aren't treating it like it's a joke - YOU HAVEN'T FUCCKING TOLD US ANYTHING!!! We need more details here, or we can't understand what you're saying.
    Posted by BriSox81[/QUOTE]

    Preferably downed like so:

    "Stuart was scared, but he loved Margalo, Mommy. And there is nothing bigger than love." -The Bean
     "His farts smell like Satan's asshole mixed with a skunk's vagina. But it's okay, because I love him." -CSousa









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    I wasn't trying to joke with you. I seriously think that what you posted is a concern, and in 6 months I don't realistically see how you could know that there are no skeletons in someone's closet.
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    In Response to Re: Hello, Wife in Training!:
    [QUOTE]I wasn't trying to joke with you. I seriously think that what you posted is a concern, and in 6 months I don't realistically see how you could know that there are no skeletons in someone's closet.
    Posted by KeptInStitches[/QUOTE]

    Totally agree. Especially since she said "I honestly THINK he has no skeletons." You don't KNOW, you THINK. However, he's trying to get you married super quick. Something about it seems sketchy.



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    soupie (I gave you a nickname!) - I was basically in the same position as you. I was with a guy who, after two months, said 'we should get married next summer,' which would have been a year after we started dating. I told him he was crazy town and that I needed to be with someone at least a year before I could consider marrying him. It also would have been his second marriage.That man is now my husband. 

    All that to say, I don't agree with the ladies who have told you to run. I do, however, suggest that you listen to that little voice inside you saying you aren't ready yet, and you need more time as a girlfriend.
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    Still here and still fabulous!

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    In Response to Re: Hello, Wife in Training!:
    [QUOTE]soupie (I gave you a nickname!) - I was basically in the same position as you. I was with a guy who, after two months, said 'we should get married next summer,' which would have been a year after we started dating. I told him he was crazy town and that I needed to be with someone at least a year before I could consider marrying him. It also would have been his second marriage.That man is now my husband.  All that to say, I don't agree with the ladies who have told you to run. I do, however, suggest that you listen to that little voice inside you saying you aren't ready yet, and you need more time as a girlfriend.
    Posted by cu97tiger[/QUOTE]

    ALLLLLLLLL DIS!

    I started dating my guy right after I turned 17. About 18 months later he wanted to propose. I told him I'd say no, so don't even try. Last week we celebrated 6 years and are just now  thinking about moving in together. If he loves you, like you say he does, he will understand and wait until you're ready. Can you guys set up a timeline? Like Tiger said, wait another 6-10 months before even broaching the subject again?

    My mom married a man she knew less than a year. She was bestowed with some pretty awesome kids (like moi!), but had to deal with a man she had never met- he went from super sweet and loving to abusive, controlling and manipulative. The marriage lasted 10 years and the divorce has lasted over 15 years. Please don't make her mistake.
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    Soup, Tiger has given you a great example and advice. You don't need to totally write off your BF, but it sounds like he isn't on the same page as you are. Have you been straightforward with him about wanting to date for at least a year? What steps have you taken as a couple to talk about all the important issues - kids, finances, etc.? These things take a while to iron out, and they should be done with care. If it takes longer than whatever timeline you guys are working from, so what?

    My BF and I have always been of the mindset that we will never regret waiting to marry while we work out some important things first (for us, school, some family things, and figuring out where we want to live someday); however, we would almost definitely regret moving too fast, because once you are in a marriage together, you cannot go backward without causing damage. I am really hoping your BF can see the wisdom in that. It is definitely hard to wait, but all good things in life are difficult at times.
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    In Response to Re:Hello, Wife in Training!:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re:Hello, Wife in Training!: So this makes you a wife in training how? Also, how does one train to be a wife?
    Posted by Stina51286[/QUOTE]
     
    I would assume she was just having some fun with the title :)
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