Wedding Etiquette Forum

Drunk at wedding

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Re: Drunk at wedding

  • Jen4948 said:

    Getting drunk is avoidable and unnecessary.
    Um, okay?  I am sorry to say but you seem rather judgey.  I could only imagine your comments about my wedding.

  • Jen4948Jen4948 member
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    edited September 2013
    Jen4948 said:

    Getting drunk is avoidable and unnecessary.
    Um, okay?  I am sorry to say but you seem rather judgey.  I could only imagine your comments about my wedding.
    I didn't make any comments about your wedding.

    When it comes to drinking, just getting buzzed is fine with me.  If people get trashed though, and start really acting idiotically or put anyone or anything in danger, I think that crosses the line.

    Edited to add: I think every member of this forum has their own issues that they're judgey about.  Drunkenness is one of mine.  I think you have some of your own based on your comments in other threads...which is fine.
  • @Jen4948 - I know you didn't make any comments.  I was saying, that I can only imagine what your comments would be like.

    The only person you can control is yourself.  If you are in a situation where there are drunk people then you leave.  It doesn't matter if you are at a wedding or at a bar or at a friends house.  Same goes for people who are hitting on you.  If you don't like it, you walk away.

  • @Jen4948 - I know you didn't make any comments.  I was saying, that I can only imagine what your comments would be like.

    The only person you can control is yourself.  If you are in a situation where there are drunk people then you leave.  It doesn't matter if you are at a wedding or at a bar or at a friends house.  Same goes for people who are hitting on you.  If you don't like it, you walk away.
    Exactly the bolded.  I think the couple owes everyone else the courtesy of doing this and not getting drunk.  If they want to "let loose," they can do so in private.
  • Jen4948 said:
    @Jen4948 - I know you didn't make any comments.  I was saying, that I can only imagine what your comments would be like.

    The only person you can control is yourself.  If you are in a situation where there are drunk people then you leave.  It doesn't matter if you are at a wedding or at a bar or at a friends house.  Same goes for people who are hitting on you.  If you don't like it, you walk away.
    Exactly the bolded.  I think the couple owes everyone else the courtesy of doing this and not getting drunk.  If they want to "let loose," they can do so in private.
    Why do you think this?  Why is it "okay" for their guests to let loose and have fun but not the bride and groom?  Are they not allowed to have fun at their reception?  Again, the bride and groom are their own two people and if they want to act like a fool at their own wedding then they are allowed to.  No you don't have to like it and no you don't have to stay and watch, but I don't think that the couple "owes" you not to get drunk.

  • ashleyepashleyep member
    First Comment 5 Love Its Name Dropper First Anniversary
    edited September 2013
    I've never hit on anyone when I'm drunk, even when I was sober. To say that that's going to happen if you get drunk at your own wedding is a little ridiculous.
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  • Am I the only one who likes drunk people (as long as they aren't blackout drunk or angry/belligerent)?  I am super friendly and outgoing when I've had a couple of drinks - but much more reserved when I'm sober.  I drink a fair bit at weddings but not nearly enough to make an ass of myself.

    I like to have fun - I hope my guests will too.
    I am the same way!

    I also don't mind some drunk people but I have to be in the mood to be around them.  When I am in a crappy mood they annoy the hell at out of me.

  • Am I the only one who likes drunk people (as long as they aren't blackout drunk or angry/belligerent)?  I am super friendly and outgoing when I've had a couple of drinks - but much more reserved when I'm sober.  I drink a fair bit at weddings but not nearly enough to make an ass of myself.

    I like to have fun - I hope my guests will too.
    I am the same way!

    I also don't mind some drunk people but I have to be in the mood to be around them.  When I am in a crappy mood they annoy the hell at out of me.
    Oh me too, but I only go out for drinks when I feel like being around other people who are drinking.

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  • I would plan on Drinking. As long as I don't fall or puke I'm good. As long as the b and g don't fight I don't care if they are drunk or even stoned.
  • I agree with everything @Maggie0829 has said about getting hit on and drunk/soberness.  

    I'm sure there will be plenty of drunk people at our wedding.

    I'm really confused by some of the comments on this thread.  It sounds like people have a different definition of "drunk" and that may be causing the confusion.  Or some people just know a lot of bad drunks.  Luckily our friends and family are more of the happy/fun drunks.  
    Don't worry guys, I have the Wedding Police AND the Whambulance on speed dial!
  • NYCBruin said:
    I agree with everything @Maggie0829 has said about getting hit on and drunk/soberness.  

    I'm sure there will be plenty of drunk people at our wedding.

    I'm really confused by some of the comments on this thread.  It sounds like people have a different definition of "drunk" and that may be causing the confusion.  Or some people just know a lot of bad drunks.  Luckily our friends and family are more of the happy/fun drunks.  
    This.  There is buzzed, drunk, and fucked up.  It is those that are fucked up that are the issue in most circumstances, not just weddings, but in every day occurrences.  The fucked up people are the one's you see getting thrown out of bars because they are falling all over the place, vomiting and pissing themselves.  I will say that I have never in all the weddings I have been to (25+) have I ever seen a fucked up guest.

  • I have one person that I'm hoping doesn't start drinking till after the ceremony (we aren't serving booze before the reception starts, but knowing our friends, there will probably be some pregamers, which doesn't really concern me except in this one particular case).

    This individual often crosses the line into the territory where she ends up stumbling around and doing this thing where she sucks on her lip ring and drools, looking like shes about to pass out at any minute, while also talking to anyone that will listen about really depressing things.  I love the girl to death when she's sober, but damn I hope she keeps it together at least until the relatives leave.  The rest of us are used to her.  
  • Completely drunk?  Yes.  
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  • I have one person that I'm hoping doesn't start drinking till after the ceremony (we aren't serving booze before the reception starts, but knowing our friends, there will probably be some pregamers, which doesn't really concern me except in this one particular case).


    This individual often crosses the line into the territory where she ends up stumbling around and doing this thing where she sucks on her lip ring and drools, looking like shes about to pass out at any minute, while also talking to anyone that will listen about really depressing things.  I love the girl to death when she's sober, but damn I hope she keeps it together at least until the relatives leave.  The rest of us are used to her.  
    Who the hell pre games before a wedding?! Its a wedding, not a football game. . . you don't tailgate a wedding.

    My family and friends are social drinkers too, but we don't start until the reception.

    "Love is the one thing we're capable of perceiving that transcends time and space."


  • I have one person that I'm hoping doesn't start drinking till after the ceremony (we aren't serving booze before the reception starts, but knowing our friends, there will probably be some pregamers, which doesn't really concern me except in this one particular case).

    This individual often crosses the line into the territory where she ends up stumbling around and doing this thing where she sucks on her lip ring and drools, looking like shes about to pass out at any minute, while also talking to anyone that will listen about really depressing things.  I love the girl to death when she's sober, but damn I hope she keeps it together at least until the relatives leave.  The rest of us are used to her.  
    Who the hell pre games before a wedding?! Its a wedding, not a football game. . . you don't tailgate a wedding. My family and friends are social drinkers too, but we don't start until the reception.
    At my venue I'll have (unlimited) mimosas for me and my girls in the salon while we get ready. I'm going to put some one Dreamergirl Drinks duty to make sure I don't over drink out of nervousness. Luckily that service only goes until about an hour and a half before the ceremony so I'll ample water and snacks time.

    Oh my god I'm starting to get so nervous. I don't know what I would do without you ladies.




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  • I have one person that I'm hoping doesn't start drinking till after the ceremony (we aren't serving booze before the reception starts, but knowing our friends, there will probably be some pregamers, which doesn't really concern me except in this one particular case).


    This individual often crosses the line into the territory where she ends up stumbling around and doing this thing where she sucks on her lip ring and drools, looking like shes about to pass out at any minute, while also talking to anyone that will listen about really depressing things.  I love the girl to death when she's sober, but damn I hope she keeps it together at least until the relatives leave.  The rest of us are used to her.  
    Who the hell pre games before a wedding?! Its a wedding, not a football game. . . you don't tailgate a wedding.

    My family and friends are social drinkers too, but we don't start until the reception.
    Me!I come from the land of wedding gaps. We almost always hit up a bar before the reception. It's pretty standard practice; I've never had a friend get hammered pre reception though. Just a couple drinks.

    As to the question - I'm with the drunk and having a good time but not a disaster is cool folks.

    Most adults have figured out their line between fabulously happy drunk and not so good drunk. And for the ones who haven't - can't control them. If it's going to be a problem, don't invite them.
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  • PDKH said:
    I have one person that I'm hoping doesn't start drinking till after the ceremony (we aren't serving booze before the reception starts, but knowing our friends, there will probably be some pregamers, which doesn't really concern me except in this one particular case).

    This individual often crosses the line into the territory where she ends up stumbling around and doing this thing where she sucks on her lip ring and drools, looking like shes about to pass out at any minute, while also talking to anyone that will listen about really depressing things.  I love the girl to death when she's sober, but damn I hope she keeps it together at least until the relatives leave.  The rest of us are used to her.  
    Who the hell pre games before a wedding?! Its a wedding, not a football game. . . you don't tailgate a wedding. My family and friends are social drinkers too, but we don't start until the reception.
    Me!I come from the land of wedding gaps. We almost always hit up a bar before the reception. It's pretty standard practice; I've never had a friend get hammered pre reception though. Just a couple drinks. As to the question - I'm with the drunk and having a good time but not a disaster is cool folks. Most adults have figured out their line between fabulously happy drunk and not so good drunk. And for the ones who haven't - can't control them. If it's going to be a problem, don't invite them.
    Ok, fail on my part- who pre games before the wedding ceremony?

    Cocktails during a gap makes total sense.

    "Love is the one thing we're capable of perceiving that transcends time and space."


  • laylasauruslaylasaurus member
    5 Love Its Name Dropper First Comment
    edited September 2013
    PDKH said:
    I have one person that I'm hoping doesn't start drinking till after the ceremony (we aren't serving booze before the reception starts, but knowing our friends, there will probably be some pregamers, which doesn't really concern me except in this one particular case).

    This individual often crosses the line into the territory where she ends up stumbling around and doing this thing where she sucks on her lip ring and drools, looking like shes about to pass out at any minute, while also talking to anyone that will listen about really depressing things.  I love the girl to death when she's sober, but damn I hope she keeps it together at least until the relatives leave.  The rest of us are used to her.  
    Who the hell pre games before a wedding?! Its a wedding, not a football game. . . you don't tailgate a wedding. My family and friends are social drinkers too, but we don't start until the reception.
    Me!I come from the land of wedding gaps. We almost always hit up a bar before the reception. It's pretty standard practice; I've never had a friend get hammered pre reception though. Just a couple drinks. As to the question - I'm with the drunk and having a good time but not a disaster is cool folks. Most adults have figured out their line between fabulously happy drunk and not so good drunk. And for the ones who haven't - can't control them. If it's going to be a problem, don't invite them.
    Yes, to this ^.  Like I said, I'm not worried about anyone but this one particular girl. And I'm not the type to be all "ooo my close but drunk friend has a tendency to over do it with booze...NO INVITE FOR HER!" 
    The younger folk having drinks pre-wedding is pretty normal around here.  Many people have served cocktails AT the ceremony, or at least had the bar open for refreshments while guests arrive and get seated. I never said they were going to be getting shit-faced before the ceremony, nor did I say they would be "tailgating".  Our ceremony is going to be in a park in a neighborhood where many of my friends live.  One of my friends is across the street and from what I've heard, she has offered her driveway up as parking for some who don't live nearby and many of them have planned on gathering there to hang out together and socialize before wandering over to the ceremony.  It wouldn't be completely out of line for them to have a beer while they all chill together.  It's not like they are going to be doing keg stands and shotgunning beers all morning.

    Someone sure did put their judgey pants on this morning.  

    edited for clarity
  • PDKH said:
    I have one person that I'm hoping doesn't start drinking till after the ceremony (we aren't serving booze before the reception starts, but knowing our friends, there will probably be some pregamers, which doesn't really concern me except in this one particular case).

    This individual often crosses the line into the territory where she ends up stumbling around and doing this thing where she sucks on her lip ring and drools, looking like shes about to pass out at any minute, while also talking to anyone that will listen about really depressing things.  I love the girl to death when she's sober, but damn I hope she keeps it together at least until the relatives leave.  The rest of us are used to her.  
    Who the hell pre games before a wedding?! Its a wedding, not a football game. . . you don't tailgate a wedding. My family and friends are social drinkers too, but we don't start until the reception.
    Me!I come from the land of wedding gaps. We almost always hit up a bar before the reception. It's pretty standard practice; I've never had a friend get hammered pre reception though. Just a couple drinks. As to the question - I'm with the drunk and having a good time but not a disaster is cool folks. Most adults have figured out their line between fabulously happy drunk and not so good drunk. And for the ones who haven't - can't control them. If it's going to be a problem, don't invite them.
    Yes, to this ^.  Like I said, I'm not worried about anyone but this one particular girl. And I'm not the type to be all "ooo my close but drunk friend has a tendency to over do it with booze...NO INVITE FOR HER!" 
    The younger folk having drinks pre-wedding is pretty normal around here.  Many people have served cocktails AT the ceremony, or at least had the bar open for refreshments while guests arrive and get seated. I never said they were going to be getting shit-faced.  

    Someone sure did put their judgey pants on this morning.  
    Lol, not really. . . I just find this behavior really odd. 

    But maybe that's because most wedding ceremonies I have ever been to have been in a church, so it's kind of hard to pre-game there ;-)  The rest didn't have the bar open until cocktail hour.

    "Love is the one thing we're capable of perceiving that transcends time and space."





  • Lol, not really. . . I just find this behavior really odd. 

    But maybe that's because most wedding ceremonies I have ever been to have been in a church, so it's kind of hard to pre-game there ;-)  The rest didn't have the bar open until cocktail hour.
    Sure, for church weddings drinking beforehand would certainly be less appropriate.  And most of the weddings I have been to have been more casual affairs, like ours will be.  Just goes to show how different social circles have different approaches.  Would I be pissed if someone got wasted before the ceremony and then did something to make an ass of themselves and disrupt the ceremony? Most definitely. Am I worried about that happening? Not at all.  I'm just hoping this one girl's drunken sloppiness doesn't reveal itself till late into the reception.  
  • I'm a party girl, too.  And most of our friends like to drink. We're also older [I'm now 50].  I drank plenty over the course of my wedding weekend, but I paced myself.  Mostly because when I drink I get tired and I didn't want to miss a thing.  My DH and friends joke that I'm 21 until 10:00 p.m., then I turn 50.

    At one point, we were all at the Tiki bar by our lake house after the wedding and reception.  I wanted to go home and get out of my wedding gown and no one would help me because they were afraid I would go to bed.  I just wanted out of my damn dress.  One girlfriend finally agreed to help me.  

    I got into a sun dress and went back to the Tiki bar and closed the place down with my friends and family.
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