S/O: What is the rudest comment someone has made about your wedding?

CrazyCatLady3 · January 2014

There were some bad ones over in the "Everyone has an opinion thread," and I thought it might be therapeutic for us to share, so I'm starting this spin-off. Go.

Inkdancer · January 2014

"You can't let your bridesmaids wear anything they want. Some of your friends have horrible taste and it will look awful!" - from my mother.

Artemischief · January 2014

"You don't deserve to have a nice wedding." My grandmother making reference to the fact FI and I have been living together.

mlemoe03 · January 2014

When I told my FSIL that we were getting married in 2015 she said I couldn't wait that long, because I'm "not getting any younger"

jdluvr06 · January 2014

When I told my mom, aunts, grandma, and great grandmother that I would not be wearing a white dress I was that I had to wear white that people would know I'm the bride. Lol. However, after reading some horror stories on here I'm feeling really lucky family wise during the wedding planning process.

vollebell · January 2014

"You know, you should just cancel your (destination) wedding and have it here. It would be so much easier for us. I can't believe your making me fly somewhere."

OK... I'll get right on that guest who hasn't even received an invitation.

HisGirlFriday13 · January 2014

Courtesy of @CrazyCatLady3's suggestion in an earlier thread, what are some of the rudest comments you have (or did) receive(d) about your wedding:

DH's grandmother:

1. Did not like the colours we had chosen (purple and gold and fall colours; they were "too vibrant");

2. Did not like the flowers ("daisies are common, but I suppose I couldn't expect better from a Catholic.");

3. Did not like that it was a Catholic Mass ("It won't be real if it's not in a real church.)";

4. Did not like that it was on a Sunday ("No one will want to come.");

5. Did not like that it was in my hometown ("It's too far away.");

6. Did not like that we wouldn't let her B-list and invite her Sunday School class after the family she demanded we invited RSVP'd 'no.'

7. Did not like that I wore my aunt's wedding dress, because it was "old" -- she hadn't seen it, but she was sure I'd look "old" in it. This comment came AFTER she asked to see it and I refused to show her a photo, citing wanting people to be surprised on the day-of.

8. Told me that my nephew was too young to be an RB and that he shouldn't be one and that only DH's nephew (her great-grandson) should be an RB.

9. Told me on the day of my wedding that, even though DH and I were married, I wasn't family.

10. Told me after the wedding that it was "a nice wedding" and I looked "almost pretty" in my wedding gown but that she would prefer it if we would agree to have our marriage blessed in her church in front of her friends, complete with new vows, so that it would be "real."

Amyzen83 · January 2014

From my sister about my beautiful green wedding shoes "you should wear those to rehearsal dinner or some other event not your wedding! They'd stick out like a sore thumb!"

Again from darling sister about my wedding colors FYI green is my fav color and I like silver and wanted Slytherin colors for our scheme. "Those colors have nothing to do with the church color scheme! You shoud have reds and yellows (ewe! I hate yellow!) plus those colors don't even reflect me or fi! Besides our church has lots of greens and deep reds which will only compliment our color choices.

She also told me not to DIY my bouquets and use real flowers says the person who is having someone else do most of her planning. It only costed me under 200 for the flowers and supplies to do the bridal and bridesmaid bouquets with left over for boutiniers and corsages and I'm proud of my handy work

LDay2014 · January 2014

MIL says (at Thanksgiving dinner table): "You're not going to wear white are you?"

Amyzen83 · January 2014

From an acquaintance at church "did you know 50% of marriages end in divorce?" My response "good! That means 50% of marriages last! And fi and I have good odds in our favor!"

wajohnson09 · January 2014

About time, your getting old. Don't want to be an old maid with only a job to go to.

I'm 26.

mimiphin · January 2014

Amyzen83 said:

From my sister about my beautiful green wedding shoes "you should wear those to rehearsal dinner or some other event not your wedding! They'd stick out like a sore thumb!" Again from darling sister about my wedding colors FYI green is my fav color and I like silver and wanted Slytherin colors for our scheme. "Those colors have nothing to do with the church color scheme! You shoud have reds and yellows (ewe! I hate yellow!) plus those colors don't even reflect me or fi! Besides our church has lots of greens and deep reds which will only compliment our color choices. She also told me not to DIY my bouquets and use real flowers says the person who is having someone else do most of her planning. It only costed me under 200 for the flowers and supplies to do the bridal and bridesmaid bouquets with left over for boutiniers and corsages and I'm proud of my handy work

@Amyzen83 So your sister wanted you to have a Gryffindor wedding!
And I love the idea of having non-bridal (not white) shoes at wedding

Amyzen83 · January 2014

Lol! Never thought of it like that hahahaha! And I'll have to post a pic of my shoes! My fi helped pick them out because they were sooo me

HisGirlFriday13 · January 2014

I wore red shoes at my wedding. And yellow is my favourite colour -- so we were kind of Gryffindor-esque?

Amyzen83 · January 2014

Nice!

Artemischief · January 2014

Courtesy of my mother "Oh, thank God you're not in a white dress, you can't wear that anymore." From my Grandma "I know what you like more than do." Thank you women who should be supporting me in all this, I really need all the extra stress. Both comments and my earlier one happened on the same day(first time I saw them after getting engaged). I had a bridezilla moment (I'm ashamed) and yelled. That is also the only day I have cried about anything wedding related. Thanks for all the stress Mom and Grandma, it's not like I'm working and planning a wedding in a town I don't live in.

pinkcow13 · January 2014

"You're having an open bar at your wedding?! You guys need to have a cash bar, or a 1 hour open bar then cash bar" - FMIL

"I don't know why you're having a huge expensive wedding where people are just going to eat and drink for free and talk about you" - Cousin after the only wedding detail I told her was that it would be sometime spring 2015.

"Wow, that's a down payment for a house. You guys are loaded like that?" - FI's cousin after we told her our venue. Yes, the wedding is not cheap, but it is wayyyy cheaper than the average NYC wedding. We set a reasonable budget and so far are sticking to it. Yea and we did not tell her how much it all cost so...

CrazyCatLady3 · January 2014

Lol @HisGirlFriday13 I knew we would get some doozies from you courtesy of your crazy GMIL.

pinkcow13 · January 2014

@hisgirlfriday13- grannie dearest sounds like a real peach!

HisGirlFriday13 · January 2014

@CrazyCatLady3 -- She was such a freaking nightmare. And now, as I posted on CC today, DH's brother and his FI have set a wedding date and aren't inviting her. GEE, I WONDER WHY?!?!

@pinkcow13 -- Yeah, my husband's grandmother really would have preferred him not to get married and not to "leave her" and not to have a life where he's not available at her beck and call 24/7. She can kiss my can.

NavyBlue143 · January 2014

@jdluvr06 - My red wedding dress was an uphill battle. My parents also said it wouldn't look like I was getting married. How do people come to a wedding and not know who is getting married? My mom called my dress a prom dress. My dad said you have to wear white for your first wedding.

I rocked that red dress though.

afox007 · January 2014

HisGirlFriday13 said:

Courtesy of @CrazyCatLady3's suggestion in an earlier thread, what are some of the rudest comments you have (or did) receive(d) about your wedding:

DH's grandmother:

1. Did not like the colours we had chosen (purple and gold and fall colours; they were "too vibrant");

2. Did not like the flowers ("daisies are common, but I suppose I couldn't expect better from a Catholic.");

3. Did not like that it was a Catholic Mass ("It won't be real if it's not in a real church.)";

4. Did not like that it was on a Sunday ("No one will want to come.");

5. Did not like that it was in my hometown ("It's too far away.");

6. Did not like that we wouldn't let her B-list and invite her Sunday School class after the family she demanded we invited RSVP'd 'no.'

7. Did not like that I wore my aunt's wedding dress, because it was "old" -- she hadn't seen it, but she was sure I'd look "old" in it. This comment came AFTER she asked to see it and I refused to show her a photo, citing wanting people to be surprised on the day-of.

8. Told me that my nephew was too young to be an RB and that he shouldn't be one and that only DH's nephew (her great-grandson) should be an RB.

9. Told me on the day of my wedding that, even though DH and I were married, I wasn't family.

10. Told me after the wedding that it was "a nice wedding" and I looked "almost pretty" in my wedding gown but that she would prefer it if we would agree to have our marriage blessed in her church in front of her friends, complete with new vows, so that it would be "real."

How have you not killed this woman yet? I think you may be in the running for sainthood!

afox007 · January 2014

All courtesy of FMIL:

"Let's see if this one will last longer than the first"

"You don't get to have a real wedding DS already had one"

"You really shouldn't worry about throwing her a shower DS already received gifts at his first wedding" to my MOH at Xmas when NO wedding talk was going on.

"Why isn't ex wife invited? She is still the mother of your child"

"You realize after this long you shouldn't bother with white though I doubt DS was your first." He definitely wasn't but seriously?

"Don't think that a wedding will make you my grandson's mother"

I won't go into the non-wedding shit, but even after listening to all this I get asked "So when are you two finally giving me another grandbaby"

Cookie Pusher · January 2014

My dear, dear mother has taken no interest in my wedding other than commentary about my weight. Imagine the following with a very thick Chinese accent:

(While pointing at my stomach) "You look pregnant at <sister>'s wedding. My friends all say you pregnant!"

(While I was trying on my wedding dress) "Your butt. It like 2 ham. Like jello, it jiggle! Not like Beyonce. This bad, like 2 hams. Wiggling!"

And, of course, the kicker: "You know I use your money, right? I buy the deck in the backyard. You too late for wedding money now."

For the record, FI and I would never even imagine taking money from our parents even if they offered it. We do okay for ourselves and are planning a wedding we can afford. Which, if we're being honest, is more wedding than our parents would be able to afford combined because we don't have a mortgage or big expenses that come along with owning homes like they do. But thanks, Mom, hope you're enjoying that deck you bought! lol

jdluvr06 · January 2014

Oh I forgot. My FBIL made some snarky comments about our venue. Apparently a horse farm is not wedding appropriate.

thisismynickname2 · January 2014

"Can you live with that the rest of your life?" - my sister when I described the nontraditional engagement ring FI and I were shopping for.
"If everyone picks their own dress, the dresses might clash and you don't want your bridal party to look cheap." - my sister.
"The ceremony starts at six? Is there going to be food beforehand?" -my sister.

Kerigirl9 · January 2014

I was amazed at the number of people who asked me which number wedding this was for me. Ummmmmm, first? I know I'm a little older than the average first time bride but seriously?

pinkshorts27 · January 2014

I've been pretty lucky. The worst I've gotten are people telling me "It's your wedding. Don't forget that" (which is sweet but annoying, because I know that) and "Why would you let your dad invite so many people?" (when looking at my guest list... well maybe because my parents are paying for the entire wedding so may invite who they wish. And my dad's friends were people I grew up around. I know them all. And they are electrical engineers... which is my career of choice. So I feel comfortable around them and many of them have helped me get internships/jobs in the past).

PolarBearFitz · January 2014

'Some of the guests might wonder why you didn't marry someone in your professional field that makes more money.' - to remain nameless (btw my FI is a mechanic)

'You should just go get married now and have the wedding later.' - FSIL in response to me saying 'I cannot wait to marry my FI.' This was a serious suggestion as she and her husband went to a JOP and planned to have a PPD later but never did thankfully.

'I better be getting an invitation to your wedding or I am coming as someone's plus one.' - friend of a friend

AddieCake · January 2014

Wow. I didn't have anyone say anything hateful to me about my wedding except my cousin's teenage son who sent me a text during the rehearsal to "have fun at your wedding that I'm not in." I had cut ties with his mother a few months before after she informed my husband (fiance at the time) that "you aren't family and nothing you have to say is relevant" when he jumped in to defend me when she was verbally attacking me about something.

Sorry some of you had to endure some pretty heinous comments and that some of you will continue to hear such things from those people!

JeeGooDowster · January 2014

Amyzen83 said:From an acquaintance at church "did you know 50% of marriages end in divorce?" My response "good! That means 50% of marriages last! And fi and I have good odds in our favor!"

OMG...yes that has happened to me too...it's like thanks for that statistic....And even worse...One woman from work who was in the middle of getting a divorce (I never discussed wedding stuff with her bc i was aware of her situation)...she was more like "Don't ever get married...run while you can...he's just going to cheat on you....haha Just kidding....oh btw how's wedding planning going?" And another....was a guy at work complaining to me about expenses how "I'll never know about managing the expenses of living together until your married..." OK...I lived with my FI (now DH) for a year and a half before got married LoL

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