I get rude comments about my wedding date being "so far away" even from vendors. It's like nobody wants to even discuss my wedding bcuz I "have plenty of time." We are getting married March 28,2015. I really don't feel like it's too soon to start planning.
I was lucky none of my vendors about that. My caterer even told me it was a good thing I booked so early because they were increasing their prices soon, so I was going to get better prices by booking so early.
I get rude comments about my wedding date being "so far away" even from vendors. It's like nobody wants to even discuss my wedding bcuz I "have plenty of time." We are getting married March 28,2015. I really don't feel like it's too soon to start planning.
Well, to be honest, it is pretty far in advance. A lot can change in a year, even with the venues.
I think much of this is relative. My daughter selected her venue in January, 2010 for her June, 2011 wedding. There was only one Saturday night opening available 18 months out. In her case, it was a win-win. This particular venue was willing to lock in those 2010 prices for her.
I get rude comments about my wedding date being "so far away" even from vendors. It's like nobody wants to even discuss my wedding bcuz I "have plenty of time." We are getting married March 28,2015. I really don't feel like it's too soon to start planning.
Well, to be honest, it is pretty far in advance. A lot can change in a year, even with the venues.
I think much of this is relative. My daughter selected her venue in January, 2010 for her June, 2011 wedding. There was only one Saturday night opening available 18 months out. In her case, it was a win-win. This particular venue was willing to lock in those 2010 prices for her.
I was engaged for over 2 years but I didn't start calling vendors seriously until 1 year out, March 2015 is just over a year away so that makes total sense. Also, vendors in my area don't book up very fast (relative to other places) so anyone in a more populous area that wants specific vendors probably would need to be planned out by this point at least for the venue, food and maybe photography.
I had a few people tell me that we were waiting too long, having too long of an engagement and my grandma keeps hinting about babies even now I'm married but generally everyone was pretty decent leading up to the wedding.
I get rude comments about my wedding date being "so far away" even from vendors. It's like nobody wants to even discuss my wedding bcuz I "have plenty of time." We are getting married March 28,2015. I really don't feel like it's too soon to start planning.
Well, to be honest, it is pretty far in advance. A lot can change in a year, even with the venues.
Well to be honest I really didn't want to hear that again, but thanks anyway
I get rude comments about my wedding date being "so far away" even from vendors. It's like nobody wants to even discuss my wedding bcuz I "have plenty of time." We are getting married March 28,2015. I really don't feel like it's too soon to start planning.
I was lucky none of my vendors about that. My caterer even told me it was a good thing I booked so early because they were increasing their prices soon, so I was going to get better prices by booking so early.
I booked my venue nearly a year in advance. I'm a morning wedding with lunch reception. 3 months after I booked the place and paid the deposit and most of the rest of the fee, their prices went up for all future bookings. A gal booked the venue for the evening, same day as me (rental fees don't change in price, but meal option pricing does, plus for Saturday evenings there's a 150 guest minimum guarantee requirement), 2 months ago. She's paying a grand more than me for the same place, which for my budget, is a lot.
Before I bought my wedding dress, I was talking to a friend of mine about dress styles and local stores. I thought it would be helpful since she had just bought hers and I thought she could help narrow down the search. (This may be a friend I have mentioned in one or two previous posts.) With out missing a beat she said, "I don't see you in a pretty dress. You're too tom-boyish for a pretty dress like mine." ummmmmmm wtf?
When I got the call that my dress finally came into the shop I was pretty excited about it so I made a post on facebook about it.
"Hope it still fits"- my mom. I made some snarky comment about it and my big sister defended me so my mom came back with a "just kidding". Yeah, pretty hilarious (I have NOT gained weight, I lost 40 lbs years ago and have been maintaining ever since and look damn good, thankyouverymuch).
And according to my dad, a marriage without God isn't a real marriage. So that's been fun to deal with as atheists.
My future in laws have been wonderful though. His mom went dress and invitation shopping with me and has been really supportive.
His uncle is kind of a basketcase and up til this point I've been told to hide my big shoulder tattoo from him. He'll see it at the wedding so that'll be entertaining. But that's a tiny blip on the radar compared to the crap my parents have been pulling.
When I got the call that my dress finally came into the shop I was pretty excited about it so I made a post on facebook about it.
"Hope it still fits"- my mom. I made some snarky comment about it and my big sister defended me so my mom came back with a "just kidding". Yeah, pretty hilarious (I have NOT gained weight, I lost 40 lbs years ago and have been maintaining ever since and look damn good, thankyouverymuch).
And according to my dad, a marriage without God isn't a real marriage. So that's been fun to deal with as atheists.
My future in laws have been wonderful though. His mom went dress and invitation shopping with me and has been really supportive.
His uncle is kind of a basketcase and up til this point I've been told to hide my big shoulder tattoo from him. He'll see it at the wedding so that'll be entertaining. But that's a tiny blip on the radar compared to the crap my parents have been pulling.
If I were you I'd let him see it before the wedding, just so he has time to flip out now, and by the time the wedding comes he'll have either gotten over it or calmed down a bit. I remember the first time I dyed my hair (at that time I did 3 inches of teal at the ends of my hair) my grandma saw it on Facebook, and FLIPPED. She was screaming at me over the phone, and by the next day she was over it. Now my hair is half maroon and half teal and she compliments it all the time. She even brought me to buy the dye.
Rebl90 We got engaged in Vegas and even considered having the wedding there. I was trying to convince the FI to stop on our way home from Hawaii. I had previously gone to Vegas with some friends and didn't enjoy myself. It depends on your company, I guess. Go Vegas!
I get rude comments about my wedding date being "so far away" even from vendors. It's like nobody wants to even discuss my wedding bcuz I "have plenty of time." We are getting married March 28,2015. I really don't feel like it's too soon to start planning.
I'm getting married January 30 2016, and I'm already trying to book vendors and am going to bridal shows. Your date definitely isn't too far in advanced. You'd think the vendors would be excited to book early!
My aunt told me my ring looks like something you'd get out of a gumball machine.
My mother works with girls my age, they wanted to be sure I would be wearing a jacket with my dress because my tattoos would look 'tacky' with such a nice dress in such a nice venue.
1) He (FI) will never make you happy. He not rich. 2) You need to test the waters with other guys. How can you know what you want if you haven't sampled the offerings? 3) Why bother with a wedding, you have already lived together. (All because FI stayed with me for 4 months after getting unexpectedly laid off.) 4) FI is apparently going to burn in hell because he is a Jew (grandma's opinion). 5) Thank God you will be wearing makeup. Don't want people thinking you look sickly.
I'm sorry for the ladies dealing with such horrible things!!
Here are the lovely ones I got:
(When someone asked to see my engagement ring) "It doesn't even look like an engagement ring." ... Uh, it's a ring on my finger symbolizing my engagement? I didn't realize I was missing another requirement.
My sister asked my FMIL to tell us not to have our wedding in November.
My Mom told me that my wedding dress didn't need to be as nice a my sister's (she also said this about my future house, totally unprompted.. thanks, Mom!).
FMIL said that if I just let my BMs get black cocktail dresses, it will look like a mess.
My Dad said that "It's ok that you're getting married in November... Wife and I tied the eternal knot in February!" ... Again, why are people annoyed that we are having a wedding in November?!?!
When I told my Dad that FI proposed, he said- "Yeah, I saw that coming... anyway, (change of subject)" That one I'm assuming is because FI didn't ask his permission first.
I've had two law school friends/acquaintances tell me "I can't believe you didn't have me as a BM!"
Uh, 1) FI and I agreed not to have a BP other than flower girls. 2) These two normally only contact me when they need/want something, though both are improving on that front. 3) You don't say shit like that.
At Bed Bath and Beyond, was approached by a clerk while I was looking at their china (they can smell brides, I swear).
Clerk starts asking questions, I mention I'm getting ideas for a registry.
Clerk starts asking wedding questions.
Tell clerk its a morning ceremony with lunch reception.
Clerk: "Oh, so it's a cheap wedding."
Me: "No, but you just lost any commission you might have gotten from me registering with this store." And walked out.
Oooh I have another small one but no biggie, both my parents were hurt that my fi didn't ask their permission before proposing to me... My sisters fi asked my parents first. I guess I can sort of see where they are coming from but 1. I'm not my sister and am doing things a bit off beat. 2. I'm a grown ass woman and my fi is a grown ass man we do not need their permission to get married and I'm not property 3. My fi didn't feel the need because he kind of told my parents his intentions of eventually proposing when they were helping us move into our place
Oh let's see...
1) He (FI) will never make you happy. He not rich.
2) You need to test the waters with other guys. How can you know what you want if you haven't sampled the offerings?
3) Why bother with a wedding, you have already lived together. (All because FI stayed with me for 4 months after getting unexpectedly laid off.)
4) FI is apparently going to burn in hell because he is a Jew (grandma's opinion).
5) Thank God you will be wearing makeup. Don't want people thinking you look sickly.
Those are a few of the most aggravating.
I've gotten the bolded too because Fi and I have been together since high school. Seriously, why would I throw away something great to "sample" what else is out there? Just for the sake of having a higher "number?" Yeah right.
And I forgot about another one. I posted this in CC. While I was trying on wedding dresses, the world's worst bridal consultant said, "Oh, that's a dress only for a size zero. You need to be a really tiny bride to carry off that dress." WHAT? I'm a size 6 and the sample size was actually too big on me. I told her manager about that, and her other inappropriate comments.
"I'm not a rude bitch. I'm ten rude bitches in a large coat."
Oooh I have another small one but no biggie, both my parents were hurt that my fi didn't ask their permission before proposing to me... My sisters fi asked my parents first. I guess I can sort of see where they are coming from but 1. I'm not my sister and am doing things a bit off beat. 2. I'm a grown ass woman and my fi is a grown ass man we do not need their permission to get married and I'm not property 3. My fi didn't feel the need because he kind of told my parents his intentions of eventually proposing when they were helping us move into our place
My DH did not ask permission, which surprised me because he is so traditional. However, at the end of the day, noone noticed. However, my first husband called my dad to ask permission and my dad didn't even realize who it was on the phone. He had met him many times before and they share the same first name. DOH! So, that was kinda rude!
Oooh I have another small one but no biggie, both my parents were hurt that my fi didn't ask their permission before proposing to me... My sisters fi asked my parents first. I guess I can sort of see where they are coming from but 1. I'm not my sister and am doing things a bit off beat. 2. I'm a grown ass woman and my fi is a grown ass man we do not need their permission to get married and I'm not property 3. My fi didn't feel the need because he kind of told my parents his intentions of eventually proposing when they were helping us move into our place
My dad had already made comments that it was important to him to have our future husbands ask him first, so I had already mentioned that to FI. I wasn't sure that he would do it though. He proposed while visiting my family for Christmas and had decided that he would ask if a convenient time came up, but if not, he wouldn't worry about it. Luckily he managed to do it, which I think helped my dad like him a little better, that he was able to show that measure of respect. But, I had also made it clear to both of them that I thought it would be inappropriate to ask for my dad's "permission"... I'm in my 30's and its my choice, not his... but, I am fine with asking for my dad's "blessing". But, my dad did tell me afterward that it really meant a lot to him that FI came to him first... of course, his next sentence was to tell me that it's not too late to change my mind and tell him no.
A couple of good ones... The first time we saw the FILs after we got engaged, DH's mother told us to just go to the courthouse to get married
But my all time favorite was from my own mother the day of the wedding... She was speaking to someone on the phone and gave them wrong information, when I corrected her she then told the person on the phone how rude I was... After she got off the phone, she then proceeded to go tell everyone who was setting up the reception area (which she had not been helping) how rude and hateful I was and that I was pretty much a horrible person... After that, she cried the rest of the day at the fact that "I hurt her feelings..." and looks extremely pissed and barely smiled in any pictures...
Parts of the planning process have been bittersweet, because I don't have any relatives, just the "family'" that I've gained over the years. But reading this thread has been very theraputic. I'm sorry for what everyone's had to deal with, but also enjoying the reminder that having relatives isn't always so great. So maybe you all didn't suffer in vain...
A couple of good ones... The first time we saw the FILs after we got engaged, DH's mother told us to just go to the courthouse to get married
But my all time favorite was from my own mother the day of the wedding... She was speaking to someone on the phone and gave them wrong information, when I corrected her she then told the person on the phone how rude I was... After she got off the phone, she then proceeded to go tell everyone who was setting up the reception area (which she had not been helping) how rude and hateful I was and that I was pretty much a horrible person... After that, she cried the rest of the day at the fact that "I hurt her feelings..." and looks extremely pissed and barely smiled in any pictures...
Good grief. There's a pretty good chance that my parents are going to no-show. I'll just remember this and remind myself that that might be a good thing.
My FI asked my parents. I didn't expect it, and really appreciate it because it went a long way toward making them like him (which they do, they just don't like that we aren't having a religious ceremony). Too bad they're still giant pains in the ass... Oh well, not for a lack of trying.
My mother has asked me several times if she has to come to my wedding. Even though she can't manage to remember the date, she does know it's on a Saturday. And she normally has to work on Saturdays. And she doesn't know if she can reschedule her shift. Even though we have her 18 months notice. lol
My FI also asked my dad and my mom for their "blessing" rather than their "permission." We were 30 at the time and had lived together for years, so permission seemed stupid.
They're both thrilled...but he said when he asked my dad, the first thing my dad said was "thank god, i thought you invited me here to tell me you got her pregnant." hahahahahaha. My dad is acually a really sweet guy, but even so i would NEVER have sent my FI to tell him that information alone if it had been the case. That would be a terrible thing to do!
(not that me being pregnant would have been a horrible scandal or anything. i mean, again, i was 30 at the time. but my dad is one of those "convenient" Catholics, so while he was ok with us living in sin, i guess having child out of wedlock is where he would have drawn the line.)
Oooh I have another small one but no biggie, both my parents were hurt that my fi didn't ask their permission before proposing to me... My sisters fi asked my parents first. I guess I can sort of see where they are coming from but 1. I'm not my sister and am doing things a bit off beat. 2. I'm a grown ass woman and my fi is a grown ass man we do not need their permission to get married and I'm not property 3. My fi didn't feel the need because he kind of told my parents his intentions of eventually proposing when they were helping us move into our place
My sister specifically told FI not to ask my Dad, which was absolutely the right thing to tell him so as to spare both FI & dear Pops a very awkward conversation. My Dad is a very shy, simple, routine based man and it just would've been uncomfortable all around.
Re: rude comments, I feel like I've been pretty lucky for the most part and have been spared a lot nonsense (knock on wood). Aforementioned dear Pops did throw a bit of a stink when he found out he'd have to take four days ("Four days for a wedding?!") off of work (...we're getting married in NW Montana, mind you. Travel to/fro will be a bit time consuming so yes, D, kind of important that you get there in plenty of time). Bless his heart - he's routine based, remember?
Oh, and I did have one friend who was passive aggressively upset by our choice in photographer (of note: we're having a small, private wedding with only family). She said, "Why didn't you just hire my DH so I could tag along and come to the wedding with him?". (...also of note: her DH was a photog major. In college. Ten years ago. And has done nothing with photography since. Oy vey.)
The more comments that have been said to you guys that I read the luckier I feel with my family and FILS. I'm going to give my mom a big hug when I see her tonight.
Re: S/O: What is the rudest comment someone has made about your wedding?
I had a few people tell me that we were waiting too long, having too long of an engagement and my grandma keeps hinting about babies even now I'm married but generally everyone was pretty decent leading up to the wedding.
Well to be honest I really didn't want to hear that again, but thanks anyway
holy shit balls that is so rude! lol
I just cannot believe the stupid shi!t that comes out of people's mouths.
1) He (FI) will never make you happy. He not rich.
2) You need to test the waters with other guys. How can you know what you want if you haven't sampled the offerings?
3) Why bother with a wedding, you have already lived together. (All because FI stayed with me for 4 months after getting unexpectedly laid off.)
4) FI is apparently going to burn in hell because he is a Jew (grandma's opinion).
5) Thank God you will be wearing makeup. Don't want people thinking you look sickly.
Those are a few of the most aggravating.
I've had two law school friends/acquaintances tell me "I can't believe you didn't have me as a BM!"
Uh, 1) FI and I agreed not to have a BP other than flower girls. 2) These two normally only contact me when they need/want something, though both are improving on that front. 3) You don't say shit like that.
At Bed Bath and Beyond, was approached by a clerk while I was looking at their china (they can smell brides, I swear).
Clerk starts asking questions, I mention I'm getting ideas for a registry.
Clerk starts asking wedding questions.
Tell clerk its a morning ceremony with lunch reception.
Clerk: "Oh, so it's a cheap wedding."
Me: "No, but you just lost any commission you might have gotten from me registering with this store." And walked out.
My DH did not ask permission, which surprised me because he is so traditional. However, at the end of the day, noone noticed. However, my first husband called my dad to ask permission and my dad didn't even realize who it was on the phone. He had met him many times before and they share the same first name. DOH! So, that was kinda rude!
My dad had already made comments that it was important to him to have our future husbands ask him first, so I had already mentioned that to FI. I wasn't sure that he would do it though. He proposed while visiting my family for Christmas and had decided that he would ask if a convenient time came up, but if not, he wouldn't worry about it. Luckily he managed to do it, which I think helped my dad like him a little better, that he was able to show that measure of respect. But, I had also made it clear to both of them that I thought it would be inappropriate to ask for my dad's "permission"... I'm in my 30's and its my choice, not his... but, I am fine with asking for my dad's "blessing". But, my dad did tell me afterward that it really meant a lot to him that FI came to him first... of course, his next sentence was to tell me that it's not too late to change my mind and tell him no.
A couple of good ones... The first time we saw the FILs after we got engaged, DH's mother told us to just go to the courthouse to get married
But my all time favorite was from my own mother the day of the wedding... She was speaking to someone on the phone and gave them wrong information, when I corrected her she then told the person on the phone how rude I was... After she got off the phone, she then proceeded to go tell everyone who was setting up the reception area (which she had not been helping) how rude and hateful I was and that I was pretty much a horrible person... After that, she cried the rest of the day at the fact that "I hurt her feelings..." and looks extremely pissed and barely smiled in any pictures...
Parts of the planning process have been bittersweet, because I don't have any relatives, just the "family'" that I've gained over the years. But reading this thread has been very theraputic. I'm sorry for what everyone's had to deal with, but also enjoying the reminder that having relatives isn't always so great. So maybe you all didn't suffer in vain...
My FI also asked my dad and my mom for their "blessing" rather than their "permission." We were 30 at the time and had lived together for years, so permission seemed stupid.
They're both thrilled...but he said when he asked my dad, the first thing my dad said was "thank god, i thought you invited me here to tell me you got her pregnant." hahahahahaha. My dad is acually a really sweet guy, but even so i would NEVER have sent my FI to tell him that information alone if it had been the case. That would be a terrible thing to do!
(not that me being pregnant would have been a horrible scandal or anything. i mean, again, i was 30 at the time. but my dad is one of those "convenient" Catholics, so while he was ok with us living in sin, i guess having child out of wedlock is where he would have drawn the line.)