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Pretty Annoyed - Bachelorette Rant

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Re: Pretty Annoyed - Bachelorette Rant

  • Jen4948Jen4948 member
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    For some reason, as soon as the diamond ring goes on a woman's finger, it turns her into Bridezilla with the idea that she owns the lives of everyone who will have anything to do with her wedding. 

    The invention of cameras was one of the worst things to happen in the history of weddings. Just an example of unintended consequences.
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  • Amyzen83Amyzen83 member
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    I like cuntwaffles!
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  • MrsMarendeMrsMarende member
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    To the Brides defense MOST of this was planned by her BP and not by her. I am thinking I may compromise and wear the dress I had intended but see if I can find a pink shirt for the wine tasting. The green dress is dark enough that I don't think it will stand out THAT much.
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  • grumbledoregrumbledore member
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    MrsMarende said:
    To the Brides defense MOST of this was planned by her BP and not by her. I am thinking I may compromise and wear the dress I had intended but see if I can find a pink shirt for the wine tasting. The green dress is dark enough that I don't think it will stand out THAT much.

    It is good to keep this in mind - BP members can be insane and awful too. I definitely think you should wear the green dress - it's amazing.

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  • erinlin25erinlin25 member
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    edited January 2014
    my thoughts exactly! Even if I could have worked around my schedule on saturday I would not have simply for what was all entailed!  I am so grateful I never had to wear a bridesmaid shirt EVER.

    edit: it did not quote what I was replying about!  @sarahufl
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  • erinlin25erinlin25 member
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    JCBride2014 said:
    16maybeless said:
    Can I just say something here? When planned in advanced with a very specific set budget in mind that does not change based on attendance, I'm sure destination bach parties can work out just fine. However, I've seen friendships end over them. The last four weddings I've attended or been a part of have included an out-of-state bach party that involved the BMs flying and paying for the bride.

    Is this now the norm? Honestly asking.
    I was invited a couple of years ago to a destination men/women bach in Vegas.  Costs disclosed upfront were roughly $2k per person for a 5 day trip.  I declined right off the bat and there were no hard feelings, but the bride and WP seemed to think that was totally normal and what a bach should be.  They are hard-partying people, though.

    One of the first things my sister said when we got engaged was she can't wait to plan a destination bach.  I told her to slow her roll until we hear from other friends because that will probably be out of budget for a lot of people!  Honestly, my perfect bach would be a fun night out locally with my friends, and a super decadent brunch the next morning.
    for a bachelorette party!!!  No way EVER. I would not even spend 2k on my own trip let alone for someone else's bachelorette party, and 5 days really!?  Did anyone even go!?

    My bachelorette party consisted of pedicures, and hanging withe great friends before dinner and a fun night out. Who needs 5 days of attention, lol.
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  • Cookie PusherCookie Pusher member
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    I totally must have missed JCB's post earlier. 2k PER PERSON for a 5 day trip to Vegas? How much did they have planned? I did 5 days in Vegas at the Paris with decadent meals, a show, and going to bars every night for that much... for 2 people. Don't ladies realize boobs can get you a lot of freebies and comps in Vegas?

    ~*~*~*~*~

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  • PrettyGirlLostPrettyGirlLost member
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    Cookie Pusher said:

    I totally must have missed JCB's post earlier. 2k PER PERSON for a 5 day trip to Vegas? How much did they have planned? I did 5 days in Vegas at the Paris with decadent meals, a show, and going to bars every night for that much... for 2 people. Don't ladies realize boobs can get you a lot of freebies and comps in Vegas?

    Lol that can aslo get you thrown out if they think you're a hooker! FI has seen it happen.


    "Love is the one thing we're capable of perceiving that transcends time and space."


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  • Amyzen83Amyzen83 member
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    grumbledore said:


    MrsMarende said:

    To the Brides defense MOST of this was planned by her BP and not by her. I am thinking I may compromise and wear the dress I had intended but see if I can find a pink shirt for the wine tasting. The green dress is dark enough that I don't think it will stand out THAT much.



    It is good to keep this in mind - BP members can be insane and awful too. I definitely think you should wear the green dress - it's amazing.

    Yes!!!!!! Try being one of 9 bridesmaids getting ready together and there were two bridesmaids who weren't even MOH and they were trying to act all alpha female! Needless to say after that wedding I avoided all of those women for like two weeks!
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  • Amyzen83Amyzen83 member
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    PrettyGirlLost said:

    Cookie Pusher said:

    I totally must have missed JCB's post earlier. 2k PER PERSON for a 5 day trip to Vegas? How much did they have planned? I did 5 days in Vegas at the Paris with decadent meals, a show, and going to bars every night for that much... for 2 people. Don't ladies realize boobs can get you a lot of freebies and comps in Vegas?

    Lol that can aslo get you thrown out if they think you're a hooker! FI has seen it happen.

    That's funny! I actually know a friend of a friend who was an ex stripper we'll call her Cindy, one night she and my friend went to Vegas for a Bach party for another friend. And Cindy got hella drunk at a strip club she thought she could dance better than the girls on stage so she and this other chick went up on the stage and started stripping. Needless to say they all got kicked out
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  • Cookie PusherCookie Pusher member
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    Yea, if you're over the top, you'll end up getting kicked out. But remember, clubs need women there in order to attract guys. And the guys will buy drinks/bottles/pay for VIP to impress women. That's why mixed-gender groups that have more women will get in to clubs with much less fuss!
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  • LowerEastSiiideLowerEastSiiide member
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    Amyzen83 said:

    LowerEastSiiide said:

    If you are a bridesmaid, you should be splitting the cost for bride- not just the two that planned it. Unfortunately, if you plan to take part in the event, you have to suck it up, pay and be done with it. If you can't do it, don't go. It's like when you go to a group dinner and complain that you only had one glass of wine and others had more. Being a grown up means splitting the bill and accepting that this is what you signed up for

    Under your shitty logic guess poor people should never participate in anything! Or go into massive debt. I think you'd be a shitty friend if this is how you treat your friends! Are you for real???!?!

    Absolutely, you're right... If you can't afford to participate, you shouldn't attend. If your laziness and lack of advancement is holding your friend from having a bachelorette she deserves, take yourself out of the equation. If your friend and her friends work hard, don't make them feel guilty for planning a vacation they probably need and worked hard for. I shouldn't have to suffer because of your inability to make a living that can afford it...
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  • LowerEastSiiideLowerEastSiiide member
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    moemacWed30594 said:


    kgd7357 said:

    To the OP. I think you just need to say that you are down with pitching in for x costs for the bride, but not okay with y costs. It's common for the costs on dest bach parties to vary slightly, although you should have gotten an estimate before agreeing to this. You should not have to pay any costs for the bride you did not already agree to.

    Mine is in March in NYC (I live in DC), since NYC was the only location where everyone could stay with someone, thus eliminating hotel costs. I am paying to get myself there and back, and for all my meals/drink except for Saturday night, which is being split among everyone else evenly. To avoid the bill splitting confusion at dinner and the bar, my MOH selected a price fixed meal, and is doing a pre paid all-you-can drink event. It comes out to everyone tossing in about $10 to cover me.

    To those hating on Lower East Side, I think this is just how things go in her social circle. It is very common in my circle to split bills evenly, as many restaurants in NYC and DC will not allow personal checks. We do encourage our friends that plan to drink/eat less to bring cash, which we'll take of the top then split the rest evenly on the cards.

    I understand what you are saying but a lot of restaurants here also don't do personal checks yet we still only pay for what we consume. With one check, we can all figure out how much to put on on our cards or how much cash to put in.


    If you insist on only paying for what you consume, any friend that's worth having is rolling their eyes and complaining about you behind their back. If they aren't, they are just as tacky and low class as you are. Sorry!

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  • LowerEastSiiideLowerEastSiiide member
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    Ha! Like being called a"troll" - whatever that means- a "bitch", etc. isn't name calling ? What twisted world are you living in? So delusional and sad ... I'm sorry you are so insulted because of your insecurities about being (lower) middle class ...
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  • PrettyGirlLostPrettyGirlLost member
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    LowerEastSiiide said:
    Ha! Like being called a"troll" - whatever that means- a "bitch", etc. isn't name calling ? What twisted world are you living in? So delusional and sad ... I'm sorry you are so insulted because of your insecurities about being (lower) middle class ...
    Hahaha, why do you assume ppl are lower middle class or middle class at all?

    "Love is the one thing we're capable of perceiving that transcends time and space."


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  • LowerEastSiiideLowerEastSiiide member
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    Because you nit pick over checks, don't give proper gifts at parties and all support each other for being the Debbie Downer who complains because they can't afford the party they insist on attending, making everyone change their plans to something lame. The majority of people outside this forum, of twisted groupthink, wouldn't support your ideas of "etiquette" in real life
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  • JellyBean52513JellyBean52513 member
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    LowerEastSiiide said:
    If you are a bridesmaid, you should be splitting the cost for bride- not just the two that planned it. Unfortunately, if you plan to take part in the event, you have to suck it up, pay and be done with it. If you can't do it, don't go. It's like when you go to a group dinner and complain that you only had one glass of wine and others had more. Being a grown up means splitting the bill and accepting that this is what you signed up for
    Under your shitty logic guess poor people should never participate in anything! Or go into massive debt. I think you'd be a shitty friend if this is how you treat your friends! Are you for real???!?!
    Absolutely, you're right... If you can't afford to participate, you shouldn't attend. If your laziness and lack of advancement is holding your friend from having a bachelorette she deserves, take yourself out of the equation. If your friend and her friends work hard, don't make them feel guilty for planning a vacation they probably need and worked hard for. I shouldn't have to suffer because of your inability to make a living that can afford it...
    Wait... but then isn't SHE the lazy one with a lack of advancement if she can't afford her bachelorette party without my involvement? Since she works so hard and makes all the mula, she can pay for the whole damn thing herself!
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  • PrettyGirlLostPrettyGirlLost member
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    LowerEastSiiide said:
    Because you nit pick over checks, don't give proper gifts at parties and all support each other for being the Debbie Downer who complains because they can't afford the party they insist on attending, making everyone change their plans to something lame. The majority of people outside this forum, of twisted groupthink, wouldn't support your ideas of "etiquette" in real life
    Lots and lots of generalizations, you're amusing.

    Do you mean the majority of people in LA and NYC?

    "Love is the one thing we're capable of perceiving that transcends time and space."


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  • jdluvr06jdluvr06 member
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    LowerEastSiiide said:
    Because you nit pick over checks, don't give proper gifts at parties and all support each other for being the Debbie Downer who complains because they can't afford the party they insist on attending, making everyone change their plans to something lame. The majority of people outside this forum, of twisted groupthink, wouldn't support your ideas of "etiquette" in real life

    I hate to ask but I have to. What is your definition of a "proper gift"?
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  • LowerEastSiiideLowerEastSiiide member
    Fourth Anniversary 100 Comments 5 Love Its
    Giving a gift that covers the approximate cost if your plate plus a little extra ... Like, if you invite me to a buffet, I might give you $100 for me and my husband total... But, a sit down dinner in a nice hall, I'll give $300
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  • PrettyGirlLostPrettyGirlLost member
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    LowerEastSiiide said:
    Giving a gift that covers the approximate cost if your plate plus a little extra ... Like, if you invite me to a buffet, I might give you $100 for me and my husband total... But, a sit down dinner in a nice hall, I'll give $300
    What about food stations?  In a mansion?

    "Love is the one thing we're capable of perceiving that transcends time and space."


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  • LowerEastSiiideLowerEastSiiide member
    Fourth Anniversary 100 Comments 5 Love Its
    $400
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  • LowerEastSiiideLowerEastSiiide member
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    Hahaha nice
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  • jdluvr06jdluvr06 member
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    Wow that is ridiculous. I wouldn't accept a gift that large from someone. Completely silly.
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