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WTH????

hlvonbhlvonb member
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in Chit Chat
Backstory: I was friends with a girl who was my Matron of Honor. Well shit hit the fan and she is no longer in the bridal party and we are not friends. 

Here are the links to the 2 posts if you want to read them to get the full background on the situation.


So I was at work today when I got a call from a number I didn't recognize. I answered it thinking it may have been a vendor that I had contacted earlier. As soon as I answer the first thing I hear is:

"Since it's been a while and you've had time to calm down, can I be your Matron of Honor again?"

Ugh, Really?!? What possessed her to think I would say yes?
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Re: WTH????

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    smalfrie19smalfrie19 member
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    WTF?!?! seriously..she TRIED TO CANCEL YOUR WEDDING!!!! What did you SAY? 
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    hlvonbhlvonb member
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    smalfrie19 said:
    WTF?!?! seriously..she TRIED TO CANCEL YOUR WEDDING!!!! What did you SAY? 
    @smalfrie19

    I told her "I don't know what made you think it was okay to call me and ask without even attempting an apology and no you can't and goodbye" and then I hung up
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    smalfrie19smalfrie19 member
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    Good for you...God that woman had balls
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    hlvonbhlvonb member
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    smalfrie19 said:
    Good for you...God that woman had balls
    @smalfrie19

    Yes she did. I seriously rolled my eyes, put my head on my desk and laughed for a minute. I was having a blah day at work so on the bright side she made the rest of my shift go by faster.
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    jdluvr06jdluvr06 member
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    Ugh! I really feel for you. I can't believe she had the nerve to ask you that after everything that she did.
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    hlvonbhlvonb member
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    jdluvr06 said:
    Ugh! I really feel for you. I can't believe she had the nerve to ask you that after everything that she did.
    @jdluvr06

    I know right?!?! She seriously needs some help!
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    pinkshorts27pinkshorts27 member
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    This girl is a new level of crazy. Definitely worse than tay-cray.  I'm a pretty forgiving person, but she would never be forgiven. I wonder if she actually has a personality disorder.? I had a friend similar to that in high school and that was a toxic friendship that I was glad to shed when I went to college.

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    hlvonbhlvonb member
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    blueeyes90 said:
    This girl is a new level of crazy. Definitely worse than tay-cray.  I'm a pretty forgiving person, but she would never be forgiven. I wonder if she actually has a personality disorder.? I had a friend similar to that in high school and that was a toxic friendship that I was glad to shed when I went to college.
    @blueeyes90

    I agree she is a new level of crazy. It may be a personality disorder but I don't think that's her main issue. I think it's something deeper .... if that makes sense
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    pinkshorts27pinkshorts27 member
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    hlvonb said:
    blueeyes90 said:
    This girl is a new level of crazy. Definitely worse than tay-cray.  I'm a pretty forgiving person, but she would never be forgiven. I wonder if she actually has a personality disorder.? I had a friend similar to that in high school and that was a toxic friendship that I was glad to shed when I went to college.
    @blueeyes90

    I agree she is a new level of crazy. It may be a personality disorder but I don't think that's her main issue. I think it's something deeper .... if that makes sense
    makes complete sense. It sounds very young/immature and insecure in her own relationship.

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    OHBride85OHBride85 member
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    I just read your previous posts and seriously can't believe she had the nerve to do that. It sounds like you were a lot nicer to her on the phone than I would have been!
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    lmcooper86lmcooper86 member
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    edited March 2014

    Oh FFS...

    I was on a hiatus from TK when this all started, so thanks for some Friday morning reading to catch up! 

    I can't believe she tried to cancel your wedding and then had the balls to call you up and act like you overreacted to something small and inconsequential. I really hope you've got all of that security sorted out for your wedding day, this shit is ridiculous.  

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    strow34strow34 member
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    I can't believe someone who was once a great friend would do this. It sounds like she is really off base. Do you have contact info for her parents or husband? I'm not sure how comfortable you would be doing this, but if one of my best friends tried sabotaging my wedding I would reach out to someone else she loves and see if they can talk to her in a loving way about her actions. 

    I still wouldn't allow her to the wedding since she seems to be way off her rocker, but I would really hope she would get some counseling or something. I'd probably get my FI to join in the call/meet up with the family member/husband just so it's not just me..maybe even some of the other WP. She is acting in a very immature and selfish way and doesn't realize how she's effecting others or if she does, she just doesn't care. 

    OR I would wait til after the wedding and then try to help in some way. 


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    climbingsingleclimbingsingle member
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    I can't believe she actually called you and said that!! 
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    phiraphira member
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    I would actually just send her a text reply saying, "You tried to cancel my wedding behind my back. We are not friends anymore. Please do not contact me or Ben again."

    Then block the shit out of her on every platform possible.
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    SBminiSBmini member
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    blueeyes90 said:
    This girl is a new level of crazy. Definitely worse than tay-cray.  I'm a pretty forgiving person, but she would never be forgiven. I wonder if she actually has a personality disorder.? I had a friend similar to that in high school and that was a toxic friendship that I was glad to shed when I went to college.
    @blueeyes90

    I agree she is a new level of crazy. It may be a personality disorder but I don't think that's her main issue. I think it's something deeper .... if that makes sense
    I think you are 100% right on the personality disorder. She sounds manic. Going from crying to canceling a wedding to asking for forgiveness. Definitely sounds manic to me. In which case, I feel bad for her. But she's got to get herself help, she can't ruin other people's lives while her disease goes unchecked. It's not fair to those other people. You made the right call in cutting her off until she figures her shit out.
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    grumbledoregrumbledore member
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    Holy shit I totally missed this whole story.  This is so crazy.  I really think that girl needs help.

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    melbelleupmelbelleup member
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    WOW! I can't believe she had the nerve to do that... makes you happy she isn't your friend anymore lol
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    HisGirlFriday13HisGirlFriday13 member
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    I feel like there's got to be more to this story. This is just so insanely weird.

    Had she never otherwise displayed personality disorder traits to you?
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    I'm gonna go with 'not my circus, not my monkeys.'
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    banana468banana468 member
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    This is totally crazy pants! Do her family members see any issues?
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    LakeR2014LakeR2014 member
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    @hlvonb   Ok so I just caught up on the story from start to finish - yikes!  Sorry you're going through this.   My only question after reading this last post and being like 'She has some nerve!' is:  Does she know that you know she tried to cancel your wedding/wedding vendors?
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    CokezerofreakCokezerofreak member
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    It's like that chick on Survivor that threw the rice in the fire then still wants you to not vote her off.  Glad she gave you a 'laugh' hlvonb.  Crazy!!!
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    hlvonbhlvonb member
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    blueeyes90 said:
    hlvonb said:
    blueeyes90 said:
    This girl is a new level of crazy. Definitely worse than tay-cray.  I'm a pretty forgiving person, but she would never be forgiven. I wonder if she actually has a personality disorder.? I had a friend similar to that in high school and that was a toxic friendship that I was glad to shed when I went to college.
    @blueeyes90

    I agree she is a new level of crazy. It may be a personality disorder but I don't think that's her main issue. I think it's something deeper .... if that makes sense
    makes complete sense. It sounds very young/immature and insecure in her own relationship.
    @blueeyes90

    I know being insecure or unhappy with how her wedding was / turned out is definitely a part of it.
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    hlvonbhlvonb member
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    OHBride85 said:
    I just read your previous posts and seriously can't believe she had the nerve to do that. It sounds like you were a lot nicer to her on the phone than I would have been!
    @OHBride85

    Yeah. I am tired of arguing with her about it and I was at work so I had to be nice and I didn't want to get into it with her. Lol
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    hlvonbhlvonb member
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    lmcooper86 said:

    Oh FFS...

    I was on a hiatus from TK when this all started, so thanks for some Friday morning reading to catch up! 

    I can't believe she tried to cancel your wedding and then had the balls to call you up and act like you overreacted to something small and inconsequential. I really hope you've got all of that security sorted out for your wedding day, this shit is ridiculous.  

    @Imcooper86

    Yes we have it figured out. I already have a flyer printed up with her information and pictures on it. I emailed it to the venue and they said they will print out a hard copy of it when it's about 2 days before the wedding. I figured I would email the vendors and what not the week of. It's too far out now for them to need to worry about it at the moment.
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    hlvonbhlvonb member
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    shrekspeare said:
    She is super nutso. Holy crap. Are you taking precautions for your wedding so she doesn't show up?
    @shrekspeare

    I am taking as much precaution as I can. We couldn't really move the date or location when this happened but we do have security at both venues and I have an unwelcome flyer printed with her information and pictures. The venues have been informed and received a copy of the flyer via email and I will email it to each vendor the week of the wedding.
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    hlvonbhlvonb member
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    strow34 said:
    I can't believe someone who was once a great friend would do this. It sounds like she is really off base. Do you have contact info for her parents or husband? I'm not sure how comfortable you would be doing this, but if one of my best friends tried sabotaging my wedding I would reach out to someone else she loves and see if they can talk to her in a loving way about her actions. 

    I still wouldn't allow her to the wedding since she seems to be way off her rocker, but I would really hope she would get some counseling or something. I'd probably get my FI to join in the call/meet up with the family member/husband just so it's not just me..maybe even some of the other WP. She is acting in a very immature and selfish way and doesn't realize how she's effecting others or if she does, she just doesn't care. 

    OR I would wait til after the wedding and then try to help in some way. 
    @strow34

    I have tried to help her in the past (with other unrelated issues) and she refused. She is the type of person where she will not believe / think she needs help until she hits rock bottom and sometimes she has to stay at rock bottom for a while before she will admit she needs help.

    I do have ways to contact her husband and parents but it won't do much. Her husband will do what she says and I am sure she has told her parents exactly what she needs to tell them to make it seem like she's a victim or was treated unfairly or something. I know she has done that in the past. And if for some reason she hasn't. Her parents would stay out of it.

    She definitely is not invited to the wedding. As I have mentioned in other posts, I have actually made an unwelcome flyer with her information and pictures that I will make sure the vendors have and the venues already do.
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    hlvonbhlvonb member
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    ClimbingBrideNY said:
    I can't believe she actually called you and said that!! 
    @ClimbingBrideNY

    I know. I was in shock when it hit me and I still can't believe it when I think about it. I just don't see / understand how anyone would think it would make sense or be okay to do that.
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    hlvonbhlvonb member
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    phira said:
    I would actually just send her a text reply saying, "You tried to cancel my wedding behind my back. We are not friends anymore. Please do not contact me or Ben again."

    Then block the shit out of her on every platform possible.
    @phira

    I thought about that but since I said no on the phone, it seems like sending that would give her satisfaction of some sort. If she contacts me again though, that it probably what I will do but we will see what happens.
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    hlvonbhlvonb member
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    SBmini said:
    blueeyes90 said:
    This girl is a new level of crazy. Definitely worse than tay-cray.  I'm a pretty forgiving person, but she would never be forgiven. I wonder if she actually has a personality disorder.? I had a friend similar to that in high school and that was a toxic friendship that I was glad to shed when I went to college.
    @blueeyes90

    I agree she is a new level of crazy. It may be a personality disorder but I don't think that's her main issue. I think it's something deeper .... if that makes sense
    I think you are 100% right on the personality disorder. She sounds manic. Going from crying to canceling a wedding to asking for forgiveness. Definitely sounds manic to me. In which case, I feel bad for her. But she's got to get herself help, she can't ruin other people's lives while her disease goes unchecked. It's not fair to those other people. You made the right call in cutting her off until she figures her shit out.
    @SBmini

    Thanks! Unfortunately she's not one to admit she needs help unless she hits rock bottom. And sometimes she won't admit it then until she's been at rock bottom for a while.
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    hlvonbhlvonb member
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    grumbledore said:
    Holy shit I totally missed this whole story.  This is so crazy.  I really think that girl needs help.
    @grumbledore

    I figured there would be people who missed it so I posted links to the other posts about it. It is some interesting reading if you have the time. And I agree, she needs help.
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