Chit Chat

Brother's Girlfriend - WWYD?

holyguacamole79holyguacamole79 a taco truck in Houston member
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edited September 2014 in Chit Chat
So, my parents are coming into town and my brother is coming over for dinner (along with his girlfriend). His girlfriend is nice enough .... She is just trying a bit too hard. Last time they were over, she hugged me and greeted me with "hey, sis!!" Um, no. They've been together a few months (and this will be the 4th time I've hung out with her). 

 The whole "hey, sis" thing makes me uncomfortable. I'm a hugger; that's no big deal to me. Any suggestions of how to reply if she calls me "sis" again? 

Some backstory - my brother got married in November 2012. His (now ex) wife and I were close - I was a BM for her, and she was one for me. They split up in April 2013, and officially divorced last fall. This is his 2nd girlfriend since the divorce, so I'm just trying to stay a bit emotionally distant because I honestly don't see them lasting too long.
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Re: Brother's Girlfriend - WWYD?

  • I wouldn't do/say anything. Just smile and nod and hopefully she'll get the hint.
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  • holyguacamole79holyguacamole79 a taco truck in Houston member
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    Omg, thanks @beethery. I've never seen GoT, but I love that gif. Apparently she asked my dad if she can call him "Pop". He said "just call me by my first name."
    OliveOilsMombekt14manillabar
  • Sugargirl1019Sugargirl1019 Deep in the Heart of Texas member
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    Laugh it off.  And say, "Oh stop that!  Call me Sarah!"
    This. It is too difficult to shut her down without hurting her feelings. Just downplay or ignore as much as possible!

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    ShesSoCold[Deleted User]
  • beetherybeethery So sayeth the fuckin' Pope. member
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    Omg, thanks @beethery. I've never seen GoT, but I love that gif. Apparently she asked my dad if she can call him "Pop". He said "just call me by my first name."
    Yeeesh. She's trying soooooo hard. Good lord :/
    --

    I'm the fuck out.

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    holyguacamole79
  • Maggie0829Maggie0829 Ravens & Bohs & Crabs & O's member
    Eighth Anniversary 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 25 Answers
    Laugh it off.  And say, "Oh stop that!  Call me Sarah!"
    This or respond back with "Hey Melissa*!"  Maybe she will eventually get the hint that you, in fact, do not think of her as a sister and would appreciate her not calling you sis.

    *I made up the name Melissa, just insert whatever her name actually is.

  • climbingsingleclimbingsingle NYC 'burbs member
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    I hate people that try too hard. Ugh. I also would just keep calling her by her first name. Hopefully she'll get the hint.
    holyguacamole79
  • "Ha! What a funny joke... she called me 'sis' - bro! She's a joker! No seriously though, my name is Sarah, please call me Sarah. It's nice to meet you again."
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    Kaurisvikinganna87
  • smalfrie19smalfrie19 Home of SB XLVIII Champs member
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    I am kind of on the other side of this. I know you think she is  trying too hard, but she is probably just vying for your approval because she cares about your brother. If she does it again, I would be kind and just say "Please, call me Sarah." 

    would you rather have someone who tries to hard, or is a straight Biatch to you?

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    Sugargirl1019jdluvr06STARMOON44
  • holyguacamole79holyguacamole79 a taco truck in Houston member
    5000 Comments Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its 5 Answers

    I am kind of on the other side of this. I know you think she is  trying too hard, but she is probably just vying for your approval because she cares about your brother. If she does it again, I would be kind and just say "Please, call me Sarah." 


    would you rather have someone who tries to hard, or is a straight Biatch to you?

    If that's the case, then she doesn't know my brother very well. She must not have figured out that my brother will date whomever he wants regardless of family "approval." And if a woman he dated was a bitch, she simply would not be welcome in our home.
  • ohannabelleohannabelle member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer First Anniversary
    edited September 2014
    Pop and Sis? What the...has she been watching old reruns of Father Knows Best? Super uncomfortable. Agreed, laugh it off and if she keeps up, correct her gently.
    holyguacamole79hikebikebemerryvikinganna87
  • Omg, thanks @beethery. I've never seen GoT, but I love that gif. Apparently she asked my dad if she can call him "Pop". He said "just call me by my first name."
    Who does this after dating somebody for a few months?! I'll bet she's fishing for a ring from your bro as well.
    image



  • holyguacamole79holyguacamole79 a taco truck in Houston member
    5000 Comments Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    Omg, thanks @beethery. I've never seen GoT, but I love that gif. Apparently she asked my dad if she can call him "Pop". He said "just call me by my first name."
    Who does this after dating somebody for a few months?! I'll bet she's fishing for a ring from your bro as well.
    This is what scares me.  When they visited my parents over Labor Day, she apparently confided in my mom regarding some sensitive stuff.  It's not clear if my brother knows this information yet.  And it's not good.

    *sigh*.  I'm just hoping she drops the whole "sis" act.
  • ShesSoColdShesSoCold bend over and I'll show ya mod
    Moderator 5000 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its
    I'd tell you to go crazy overboard and make her uncomfortable with something like suggesting sister tattoos but I'm afraid she'd call your bluff.
    Image result for someecard betting someone half your shit youll love them forever
    holyguacamole79flyingfoxes
  • Omg, thanks @beethery. I've never seen GoT, but I love that gif. Apparently she asked my dad if she can call him "Pop". He said "just call me by my first name."
    Who does this after dating somebody for a few months?! I'll bet she's fishing for a ring from your bro as well.
    This is what scares me.  When they visited my parents over Labor Day, she apparently confided in my mom regarding some sensitive stuff.  It's not clear if my brother knows this information yet.  And it's not good.

    *sigh*.  I'm just hoping she drops the whole "sis" act.
    She must be really good in the sack because she sounds like a crazypants.
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  • holyguacamole79holyguacamole79 a taco truck in Houston member
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    southernbelle0915, yep.
    image

    Seriously though, it's weird that she is trying SO hard with the family.  She also addressed my husband as "bro." 
    chibiyui
  • Omg, thanks @beethery. I've never seen GoT, but I love that gif. Apparently she asked my dad if she can call him "Pop". He said "just call me by my first name."
    Who does this after dating somebody for a few months?! I'll bet she's fishing for a ring from your bro as well.
    This is what scares me.  When they visited my parents over Labor Day, she apparently confided in my mom regarding some sensitive stuff.  It's not clear if my brother knows this information yet.  And it's not good.

    *sigh*.  I'm just hoping she drops the whole "sis" act.
    Dear god, she better not be pregnant.
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    RebeccaB88
  • I have never heard FI call his sisters "sis", he just calls them by their names. Ok, nicknames from childhood, but still...not addressing his relation towards them. That's just weird on it's own. I'm only child, but I can't think of a single friend of mine who walks around calling their sibling "bro" or "sis".

    When FI and I got engaged and told his family his youngest sister said "So I get another big sister, huh sis? You're gonna be my big sis!" and that's the only time she's ever called me "sis". After being with her brother for 2 years, she waited until he put a ring on it.
  • holyguacamole79holyguacamole79 a taco truck in Houston member
    5000 Comments Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    Omg, thanks @beethery. I've never seen GoT, but I love that gif. Apparently she asked my dad if she can call him "Pop". He said "just call me by my first name."
    Who does this after dating somebody for a few months?! I'll bet she's fishing for a ring from your bro as well.
    This is what scares me.  When they visited my parents over Labor Day, she apparently confided in my mom regarding some sensitive stuff.  It's not clear if my brother knows this information yet.  And it's not good.

    *sigh*.  I'm just hoping she drops the whole "sis" act.
    Dear god, she better not be pregnant.
    oh shit, please don't scare me like that.
    steph861larrygagachibiyui
  • holyguacamole79holyguacamole79 a taco truck in Houston member
    5000 Comments Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    I have never heard FI call his sisters "sis", he just calls them by their names. Ok, nicknames from childhood, but still...not addressing his relation towards them. That's just weird on it's own. I'm only child, but I can't think of a single friend of mine who walks around calling their sibling "bro" or "sis".

    When FI and I got engaged and told his family his youngest sister said "So I get another big sister, huh sis? You're gonna be my big sis!" and that's the only time she's ever called me "sis". After being with her brother for 2 years, she waited until he put a ring on it.
    When my brother & his ex got married, I took a pic of us at the wedding and the caption was "my new sister-in-law!".  But we never addressed each other with that.  I have a sister, and we never call each other "sis."
  • As somebody who totally calls her siblings sis and brother more than their actual names, I don't find it weird other than they've only been dating a short time. I call FI's younger sister(A) sis because she started it and it just doesn't feel weird, I guess? His other sister(J) I do sometimes, but not like I do with A. I call them my sisters in law to other people just because it's easier? 
  • holyguacamole79holyguacamole79 a taco truck in Houston member
    5000 Comments Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    bc+rw16 said:
    As somebody who totally calls her siblings sis and brother more than their actual names, I don't find it weird other than they've only been dating a short time. I call FI's younger sister(A) sis because she started it and it just doesn't feel weird, I guess? His other sister(J) I do sometimes, but not like I do with A. I call them my sisters in law to other people just because it's easier? 
    It's just presumptuous. 

    And she probably has no idea that I was so close to my brother's ex-wife.  She was one of my bridesmaids.  Their split really upset me.  So, I'm very cautious to get too close to my any brother's girlfriends since the divorce.
  • bc+rw16 said:
    As somebody who totally calls her siblings sis and brother more than their actual names, I don't find it weird other than they've only been dating a short time. I call FI's younger sister(A) sis because she started it and it just doesn't feel weird, I guess? His other sister(J) I do sometimes, but not like I do with A. I call them my sisters in law to other people just because it's easier? 
    It's just presumptuous. 

    And she probably has no idea that I was so close to my brother's ex-wife.  She was one of my bridesmaids.  Their split really upset me.  So, I'm very cautious to get too close to my any brother's girlfriends since the divorce.
    Probably not. How old is she? Maybe I'd just sit her down and tell her what's up? 
  • holyguacamole79holyguacamole79 a taco truck in Houston member
    5000 Comments Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    bc+rw16 said:
    bc+rw16 said:
    As somebody who totally calls her siblings sis and brother more than their actual names, I don't find it weird other than they've only been dating a short time. I call FI's younger sister(A) sis because she started it and it just doesn't feel weird, I guess? His other sister(J) I do sometimes, but not like I do with A. I call them my sisters in law to other people just because it's easier? 
    It's just presumptuous. 

    And she probably has no idea that I was so close to my brother's ex-wife.  She was one of my bridesmaids.  Their split really upset me.  So, I'm very cautious to get too close to my any brother's girlfriends since the divorce.
    Probably not. How old is she? Maybe I'd just sit her down and tell her what's up? 
    I'm not sure ... late 20s?  My brother is 32 and I'm 35.  I'll just kindly correct her if she does it.  I'm really not keen on sitting her down to talk.
  • smalfrie19smalfrie19 Home of SB XLVIII Champs member
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    bc+rw16 said:
    bc+rw16 said:
    As somebody who totally calls her siblings sis and brother more than their actual names, I don't find it weird other than they've only been dating a short time. I call FI's younger sister(A) sis because she started it and it just doesn't feel weird, I guess? His other sister(J) I do sometimes, but not like I do with A. I call them my sisters in law to other people just because it's easier? 
    It's just presumptuous. 

    And she probably has no idea that I was so close to my brother's ex-wife.  She was one of my bridesmaids.  Their split really upset me.  So, I'm very cautious to get too close to my any brother's girlfriends since the divorce.
    Probably not. How old is she? Maybe I'd just sit her down and tell her what's up? 
    I'm not sure ... late 20s?  My brother is 32 and I'm 35.  I'll just kindly correct her if she does it.  I'm really not keen on sitting her down to talk.
    I get you were really close to his ex wife and their split hurt, but to me it just seems like you really don't want to get to know her and are willing to let any little thing about her bother you. JMO.
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    AlexisA01STARMOON44
  • Take @Beethery's advice and call her the wrong name, but take it one step further and give her a family member title like 'mom' or 'daughter'. That oughtta throw her for a loop. "Oh, is it weird when I  call you 'mom'? I thought we were just coming up with ridiculous nicknames for each other, since you keep calling me 'sis' and all."
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    beethery
  • beetherybeethery So sayeth the fuckin' Pope. member
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    bc+rw16 said:
    bc+rw16 said:
    As somebody who totally calls her siblings sis and brother more than their actual names, I don't find it weird other than they've only been dating a short time. I call FI's younger sister(A) sis because she started it and it just doesn't feel weird, I guess? His other sister(J) I do sometimes, but not like I do with A. I call them my sisters in law to other people just because it's easier? 
    It's just presumptuous. 

    And she probably has no idea that I was so close to my brother's ex-wife.  She was one of my bridesmaids.  Their split really upset me.  So, I'm very cautious to get too close to my any brother's girlfriends since the divorce.
    Probably not. How old is she? Maybe I'd just sit her down and tell her what's up? 
    I'm not sure ... late 20s?  My brother is 32 and I'm 35.  I'll just kindly correct her if she does it.  I'm really not keen on sitting her down to talk.
    I get you were really close to his ex wife and their split hurt, but to me it just seems like you really don't want to get to know her and are willing to let any little thing about her bother you. JMO.
    Idk, ex-wife aside, I'd still be like, "Why the hell is this girl calling me sis?"

    I am an only child though and nobody has ever, or will ever, call me sis, and I'm cool with that. FSIL has called me her FSIL once. If she was up my ass calling me 'sis' all the time I'd be put off by it. I ain't her sister.
    --

    I'm the fuck out.

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    steph861
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