This is definitely a rant. And it's long, sorry.
FMIL gave FI and I her house and everything in it when she moved out 6 months ago. It was unexpected, and is greatly appreciated. It should be noted that she pays the mortgage still, which I believe she offered so that I could finish school without having to work any more hours. We are going to pay at least half the mortgage once I get a full time job or second job. We pay for all the other bills associated with the house (though my contribution is very tiny at the moment, which FI and I agreed upon before we agreed to take the bills on). We never would have moved in together until I got better pay.
She told us she wants three certain pieces of furniture, and we can do whatever we want with the rest. To me, this means that she gifted us all of this, and it now belongs to us. We consider this our home, and FMIL agrees (she'll say she's going to FI and timewellwasted's house and things like that).
Well. FBIL and his wife are settling on a house this month. They've been living in her mom's basement for about 4-ish years and had an apartment for a year or two before that. FBIL told FMIL he wants one of the couches and the dining room table. That belong to FI and I now.
I am not happy. These are ours now. I do not want to give them our furniture. At first, FI said that they should get some. I asked him if his mom had not moved out, would his brother waltz in here and say, I need to furnish my home, so I want that couch and your dining room table? I'd certainly hope not! People don't just get to take other people's furniture when they want it. Usually, people offer furniture if they are planning on getting something new and are throwing out the old. Or you take it when they die (not to be blunt, but that's what happens).
Not only that, but FBIL and FSIL make almost three times what FI does! We do not have the money to replace any furniture. Yes, we could find something cheap for the time being, or find someone giving stuff away, but why would we spend our time and money so that FBIL gets what he wants for free? And why would you buy a house if you can't afford to furnish it? Besides, they have a couch already (which was actually given to them by FMIL when she bought a new one a few years ago). I don't think they have a dining room table anymore, though. FI also said they may want other things, he's not sure though.
There is a dining room table one of their friends is giving away, but FBIL doesn't like the color of the wood. He likes ours better. I mean really?
FI and I came to an agreement for what we want to tell them. FI does not want them to take the couch in the basement. It is a very nice couch and was quite expensive. If they took it, it would be replaced by something cheap, either used or a futon. Why should we give away something nice to get something crappy? I do not want them to take the couch set (comes with love seat) from the living room. That's the main room of the house, and where we have our guests. So we will tell them they we don't want them to take any of the couches. We agreed to look at this other dining room table, but if we don't like it, we will keep our table too. I honestly think it's reasonable to say no, you can't take our stuff, but we will try to help if possible.
FMIL might be a problem though. She's the one that told FI about what FBIL wants, and she wants to sit down and discuss the furniture situation. I'm sorry, but this was a gift you gave us! Now it sounds like she is going to take part of her gift back.
I pointed out to FI that she gives gifts to his brother all the time. She has helped him buy multiple vehicles, contributed to his wedding, and straight up written him massive checks. She has never given FI anything outside of birthday/Christmas/graduation presents and beyond the realm of him living with her through college and not having to pay bills or for gas (FBIL would have gotten this too if he had chosen to go to college and he still never had to pay rent or for food or tv/internet when he lived here). Why is FBIL entitled to the one gift that was not given to him? I should point out that FMIL has literally told me FI is better than FBIL, and is her favorite (which I though was a terrible thing to say). FI has just never needed her help, and has always found a way to take care of himself.
I don't know, am I being a bratty toddler? This is mine, I don't want to share! Or is it not truly our furniture, because she's still paying the mortgage? She told us what furniture she would be back for, and that we could do what we wanted with everything else. I'm very angry that this was even asked, and while FI is not angry, he understands and agrees with me. He's definitely not going to tell them off for asking, but do you think we have the right to refuse, even if it's what his mom wants? Or am I being selfish, thinking FI and I are the owners and entitled to all the furniture?