I already address your point re: wine- requiring expensive wine is princessish.
It's clear now novella doesn't. Awesome. But I still maintain that I don't believe anyone who says the only kind of gin they can drink is tanqueray, because science.
...and I don't believe anyone who says horses shouldn't wear pajamas, but nobody said that in this thread. Glad we cleared that up.
I already address your point re: wine- requiring expensive wine is princessish.
It's clear now novella doesn't. Awesome. But I still maintain that I don't believe anyone who says the only kind of gin they can drink is tanqueray, because science.
But she didn't say that the only kind of gin she can drink is Tanqueray. On page 2 she specifically said that she would drink whatever vodka or gin the host had to offer, she just said that those two were her brands and that's what she would bring.
People bringing an unsolicited dish to a dinner party as an attempt at kindness or politeness isn't really that big of a deal either.
I'm going to refer to something Starmoon mentioned in a post not bc I am picking on her but simply bc I remember it:
So fucking what if someone brings a tater tot casserole to your fancy Coq au Vin dinner party? They were trying to be nice, why waste energy choosing to feel offended? Remember, you are in charge of your own feelings and reactions.
Don't like tater tot casserole? Dont eat it. But it's very presence will not detract from your Coq au Vin.
"Love is the one thing we're capable of perceiving that transcends time and space."
If you don't want people to think your stomach issues are BS, don't pretend like you need top shelf liquor to function.
And I still wouldn't bring it. Drink what they provide- if that's not your alcohol of preference, water. I'd feel differently if everyone always brought a bottle of something but since you know that isn't the case with this hostess I really wouldn't. As a hostess if I'm serving beer and wine, I've got that totally covered. I actually don't want one person showing up with gin, because if I were serving liquor I'd want to meet my own standards- have enough for everyone, make the fancy ice, make sure I have enough glasses etc.
Same deal with food. No. I don't want you to bring a dish unless it's a potluck. I've planned the menu carefully and I don't want additions to it. By all means don't show up empty handed if that bothers you, but bring a hostess dish not tater tot casserole.
Would you want a guest to let you know if they had dietary issues though?
My friend has a lactose allergy- she is not intolerant, it's an allergy and dairy products cause paralysis of her intestines. . . no peristalsis, no movement for days. She also cannot eat onions for the same reason.
She always has to ask if food items have dairy or onions in them.
Absolutely! and I wouldn't ask any follow up questions. You tell me "oh I can't eat onions" or even "I'm really sensitive so I'd like to just bring my own/could you make me white rice" and I will bend over backwards to make sure you can eat something. But I view alcohol differently- you should be able to eat and drink something, not provide me with your preferences in case I don't have them.
Right. And in this case, novella said she has stomach issues with some things, but she knows she doesn't with these particular things, and she wanted to know if it was OK to bring it. She ALSO said she'd be perfectly fine drinking water if the response was that it would be rude. You're making a big, massive fucking deal out of something and insulting her because you seem to believe that she's making up her digestive issues, which is a super assholeish thing to do. People have food (including alcohol) sensitivities, even if you don't understand them.
?!?
She said in her post name brand liquor. I reacted to her words. I didn't and still don't believe that and she clarified what she meant. How having opinions and sharing them in response to a question makes me super assholeish is beyond me.
SIB
Wait, name brand liquor as opposed to what? Generic liquor? I said in an earlier post that Stoli, where I live, is $17 per bottle. It's not considered top shelf in my circle at all. It's not Kettle One or Grey Goose. I don't get how naming specific brands that I happen to like makes me a liar or something?
And what do you still not believe? I'm confused.
I don't believe that there exists anyone who can only drink Stoli as opposed to vodka generally. Name brand as opposed to just a type of liquor.
And you've clarified that's not what you meant.
I'm just now saying actually not believing in the power of name brands on stomachs doesn't make me an asshole.
I think, end of day, if someone is going to scoff at you for having a medical condition and preferring to still enjoy yourself while not being in pain/hospital, then they have a bigger problem than you being rude.
Sweet baby Jesus, people. Before yet another CC thread turns into the everyone gets offended game, every one grab your drink of choice and Calm.the.Eff.Down.
"Love is the one thing we're capable of perceiving that transcends time and space."
If you don't want people to think your stomach issues are BS, don't pretend like you need top shelf liquor to function.
And I still wouldn't bring it. Drink what they provide- if that's not your alcohol of preference, water. I'd feel differently if everyone always brought a bottle of something but since you know that isn't the case with this hostess I really wouldn't. As a hostess if I'm serving beer and wine, I've got that totally covered. I actually don't want one person showing up with gin, because if I were serving liquor I'd want to meet my own standards- have enough for everyone, make the fancy ice, make sure I have enough glasses etc.
Same deal with food. No. I don't want you to bring a dish unless it's a potluck. I've planned the menu carefully and I don't want additions to it. By all means don't show up empty handed if that bothers you, but bring a hostess dish not tater tot casserole.
Would you want a guest to let you know if they had dietary issues though?
My friend has a lactose allergy- she is not intolerant, it's an allergy and dairy products cause paralysis of her intestines. . . no peristalsis, no movement for days. She also cannot eat onions for the same reason.
She always has to ask if food items have dairy or onions in them.
Absolutely! and I wouldn't ask any follow up questions. You tell me "oh I can't eat onions" or even "I'm really sensitive so I'd like to just bring my own/could you make me white rice" and I will bend over backwards to make sure you can eat something. But I view alcohol differently- you should be able to eat and drink something, not provide me with your preferences in case I don't have them.
Right. And in this case, novella said she has stomach issues with some things, but she knows she doesn't with these particular things, and she wanted to know if it was OK to bring it. She ALSO said she'd be perfectly fine drinking water if the response was that it would be rude. You're making a big, massive fucking deal out of something and insulting her because you seem to believe that she's making up her digestive issues, which is a super assholeish thing to do. People have food (including alcohol) sensitivities, even if you don't understand them.
The brand name won't have an impact, but the specific methods of distilling one variety of alcohol versus another absolutely could. They are not all produced identically. You could have a reaction to the fish proteins used in fining one variety of beer, but not another that uses a different ingredient. People with extreme sensitivities to grains could have a reaction to standard vodka but not potato vodka. Levels of sulphites in wine vary from brand to brand, white to red, and cask to bottle, and can cause asthmatic reactions. There could be a particular botanical that's used in one brand of gin and not another that causes a reaction.
People bringing an unsolicited dish to a dinner party as an attempt at kindness or politeness isn't really that big of a deal either.
I'm going to refer to something Starmoon mentioned in a post not bc I am picking on her but simply bc I remember it:
So fucking what if someone brings a tater tot casserole to your fancy Coq au Vin dinner party? They were trying to be nice, why waste energy choosing to feel offended? Remember, you are in charge of your own feelings and reactions.
Don't like tater tot casserole? Dont eat it. But it's very presence will not detract from your Coq au Vin.
Here I do disagree. I'd put that in the fridge with a thank you and not serve it. If I've put together a lovely elegant meal of my French favorites there's no way I'm putting your tater tot casserole on that table. It upsets the entire balance of the meal.
I'm also not sold on the idea that they're always trying to be nice. Sometimes, sure. Sometimes, they're showing off their cooking skills (which host your own party). Sometimes they're sending a message of I don't like you're cooking do here's something edible.
ETA: I think the level of offense taking also depends on what's customary in your circle. If every party except mine is a bring your own hot dish deal, I shouldn't be getting all huffy. In mine it's decidedly not the done thing, so if someone did bring a dish it would be more likely to be making a statement I find offensive.
I already address your point re: wine- requiring expensive wine is princessish.
It's clear now novella doesn't. Awesome. But I still maintain that I don't believe anyone who says the only kind of gin they can drink is tanqueray, because science.
She didn't say that. She said that's what she prefers. Sheesh.
People bringing an unsolicited dish to a dinner party as an attempt at kindness or politeness isn't really that big of a deal either.
I'm going to refer to something Starmoon mentioned in a post not bc I am picking on her but simply bc I remember it:
So fucking what if someone brings a tater tot casserole to your fancy Coq au Vin dinner party? They were trying to be nice, why waste energy choosing to feel offended? Remember, you are in charge of your own feelings and reactions.
Don't like tater tot casserole? Dont eat it. But it's very presence will not detract from your Coq au Vin.
Here I do disagree. I'd put that in the fridge with a thank you and not serve it. If I've put together a lovely elegant meal of my French favorites there's no way I'm putting your tater tot casserole on that table. It upsets the entire balance of the meal.
I'm also not sold on the idea that they're always trying to be nice. Sometimes, sure. Sometimes, they're showing off their cooking skills (which host your own party). Sometimes they're sending a message of I don't like you're cooking do here's something edible.
The duggars would bring tater tot casserole to fancy french night. It's very them.
Right now I would prefer a nice Bloody Mary. Zing Zang mix, Northern Latitudes horseradish vodka, Cholula, Lea & Perrin's Worcestershire sauce. You can go generic with the splash of pickle juice, thanks.
Right now I would prefer a nice Bloody Mary. Zing Zang mix, Northern Latitudes horseradish vodka, chipotle Cholula, Lea & Perrin's Worcestershire sauce. You can go generic with the splash of pickle juice, thanks.
HORSERADISH VODKA?!
Guess I know what I'm stocking my new apartment with this weekend!
(But, seriously, I love Bloody Marys so hard. That sounds incredible.)
People bringing an unsolicited dish to a dinner party as an attempt at kindness or politeness isn't really that big of a deal either.
I'm going to refer to something Starmoon mentioned in a post not bc I am picking on her but simply bc I remember it:
So fucking what if someone brings a tater tot casserole to your fancy Coq au Vin dinner party? They were trying to be nice, why waste energy choosing to feel offended? Remember, you are in charge of your own feelings and reactions.
Don't like tater tot casserole? Dont eat it. But it's very presence will not detract from your Coq au Vin.
Here I do disagree. I'd put that in the fridge with a thank you and not serve it.If I've put together a lovely elegant meal of my French favorites there's no way I'm putting your tater tot casserole on that table. It upsets the entire balance of the meal.
I'm also not sold on the idea that they're always trying to be nice. Sometimes, sure. Sometimes, they're showing off their cooking skills (which host your own party). Sometimes they're sending a message of I don't like you're cooking do here's something edible.
ETA: I think the level of offense taking also depends on what's customary in your circle. If every party except mine is a bring your own hot dish deal, I shouldn't be getting all huffy. In mine it's decidedly not the done thing, so if someone did bring a dish it would be more likely to be making a statement I find offensive.
How is the bolded not "princessy" behavior? I feel like that would be very rude of someone to do, almost like receiving and gift and saying" thanks!" and then throwing it in the trash right in front of them because you didn't care for it or whatever.
I already address your point re: wine- requiring expensive wine is princessish.
It's clear now novella doesn't. Awesome. But I still maintain that I don't believe anyone who says the only kind of gin they can drink is tanqueray, because science.
She didn't say that. She said that's what she prefers. Sheesh.
For the record, I refuse to drink Grey Goose, which is a lot more expensive than Stoli (usually twice as much) because it's made from grapes. It's supposed to be the epitome of fancy vodka, but I think vodka made from grapes is garbage. So yep I'm a total vodka snob. But I am no princess.
@PrettyGirlLost: People bringing an unsolicited dish to a dinner party as an attempt at kindness or politeness isn't really that big of a deal either.
I'm going to refer to something Starmoon mentioned in a post not bc I am picking on her but simply bc I remember it:
So fucking what if someone brings a tater tot casserole to your fancy Coq au Vin dinner party? They were trying to be nice, why waste energy choosing to feel offended? Remember, you are in charge of your own feelings and reactions.
Don't like tater tot casserole? Dont eat it. But it's very presence will not detract from your Coq au Vin.
Here I do disagree. I'd put that in the fridge with a thank you and not serve it. If I've put together a lovely elegant meal of my French favorites there's no way I'm putting your tater tot casserole on that table. It upsets the entire balance of the meal.
I'm also not sold on the idea that they're always trying to be nice. Sometimes, sure. Sometimes, they're showing off their cooking skills (which host your own party). Sometimes they're sending a message of I don't like you're cooking do here's something edible.
ETA: I think the level of offense taking also depends on what's customary in your circle. If every party except mine is a bring your own hot dish deal, I shouldn't be getting all huffy. In mine it's decidedly not the done thing, so if someone did bring a dish it would be more likely to be making a statement I find offensive.
Yea, I agree with this.
If someone, unsolicited, brought food when I already had a menu decided, I wouldn't be like "fuck you, party guest, and your tater tot casserole! Now get out of my house before I call the food police!" But I WOULD be like, "thank you so much and we're so glad you could make it!" and then I put it in the fridge.
"Unsolicited" is the key word here. If someone just randomly brings something, I assume it's a hostess gift and I can do with it as I please. Including but not limited to deciding not to serve it.
Right now I would prefer a nice Bloody Mary. Zing Zang mix, Northern Latitudes horseradish vodka, chipotle Cholula, Lea & Perrin's Worcestershire sauce. You can go generic with the splash of pickle juice, thanks.
HORSERADISH VODKA?!
Guess I know what I'm stocking my new apartment with this weekend!
(But, seriously, I love Bloody Marys so hard. That sounds incredible.)
The only place I've found it is at Northern Latitudes distillery in Traverse City (northwestern Michigan). It is FANTASTIC. They said they only knew of one other distillery that makes it (Referent in Wisconsin).
ETA they also distill their gin with lavender. Delicious with tonic and a twist of orange.
People bringing an unsolicited dish to a dinner party as an attempt at kindness or politeness isn't really that big of a deal either.
I'm going to refer to something Starmoon mentioned in a post not bc I am picking on her but simply bc I remember it:
So fucking what if someone brings a tater tot casserole to your fancy Coq au Vin dinner party? They were trying to be nice, why waste energy choosing to feel offended? Remember, you are in charge of your own feelings and reactions.
Don't like tater tot casserole? Dont eat it. But it's very presence will not detract from your Coq au Vin.
Here I do disagree. I'd put that in the fridge with a thank you and not serve it. If I've put together a lovely elegant meal of my French favorites there's no way I'm putting your tater tot casserole on that table. It upsets the entire balance of the meal.
I'm also not sold on the idea that they're always trying to be nice. Sometimes, sure. Sometimes, they're showing off their cooking skills (which host your own party). Sometimes they're sending a message of I don't like you're cooking do here's something edible.
Put it in the fridge, but choosing to feel offended is still up to you. Putting it on the table still won't really have any effect on those who choose not to eat it, unless you think that it's mere pressence would visually disrupt the balance too. While I can respect your vision as a culinary artist and agree the casserole might be gauche and annoying, I still think we are wasting a lot of energy fretting about some spuds.
And if anyone chooses to eat 5 he casserole, well they obviously don't give a shit about balance!
I'm going to wager MOST people have no nefarious intentions with bringing an unsolicited dish to a party. Look at how many ppl in this thread stated they were raised to bring something to a party, which sometimes is food.
Maybe you have issues with specific ppl in your life that are trying to be passive aggressive and rude. Some people are like that, I know. Just judge everyone on a case by case basis ;-)
"Love is the one thing we're capable of perceiving that transcends time and space."
Right now I would prefer a nice Bloody Mary. Zing Zang mix, Northern Latitudes horseradish vodka, chipotle Cholula, Lea & Perrin's Worcestershire sauce. You can go generic with the splash of pickle juice, thanks.
HORSERADISH VODKA?!
Guess I know what I'm stocking my new apartment with this weekend!
(But, seriously, I love Bloody Marys so hard. That sounds incredible.)
The only place I've found it is at Northern Latitudes distillery in Traverse City (northwestern Michigan). It is FANTASTIC. They said they only knew of one other distillery that makes it (Referent in Wisconsin).
ETA they also distill their gin with lavender. Delicious with tonic and a twist of orange.
Damn. I'm not usually jealous of MI, but y'all have good shit.
I already address your point re: wine- requiring expensive wine is princessish.
It's clear now novella doesn't. Awesome. But I still maintain that I don't believe anyone who says the only kind of gin they can drink is tanqueray, because science.
She didn't say that. She said that's what she prefers. Sheesh.
For the record, I refuse to drink Grey Goose, which is a lot more expensive than Stoli (usually twice as much) because it's made from grapes. It's supposed to be the epitome of fancy vodka, but I think vodka made from grapes is garbage. So yep I'm a total vodka snob. But I am no princess.
I don't even know if I can talk to you. Ciroc is my go-to and it is made from grapes. SOOOOOO GOOOOOOOODDDDD
WINE!!!!!
It's shitty and raining out and my back is aching. . .so it's pizza, wine, and Jammies night. We'll it will be soon.
Emmaaa is making me consider a Hot Whiskey though. . .id need lemons and cloves, though.
Just mentioning hot whiskey really makes me want a honey-whiskey hot toddy.
Re: Bringing liquor-- update in the thread
I'm going to refer to something Starmoon mentioned in a post not bc I am picking on her but simply bc I remember it:
So fucking what if someone brings a tater tot casserole to your fancy Coq au Vin dinner party? They were trying to be nice, why waste energy choosing to feel offended? Remember, you are in charge of your own feelings and reactions.
Don't like tater tot casserole? Dont eat it. But it's very presence will not detract from your Coq au Vin.
"Love is the one thing we're capable of perceiving that transcends time and space."
?!?
She said in her post name brand liquor. I reacted to her words. I didn't and still don't believe that and she clarified what she meant. How having opinions and sharing them in response to a question makes me super assholeish is beyond me.
I don't believe that there exists anyone who can only drink Stoli as opposed to vodka generally. Name brand as opposed to just a type of liquor.
And you've clarified that's not what you meant.
I'm just now saying actually not believing in the power of name brands on stomachs doesn't make me an asshole.
"Love is the one thing we're capable of perceiving that transcends time and space."
AMEN.
Damn working hours! If only it was acceptable to start at 1pm on a friday
"Love is the one thing we're capable of perceiving that transcends time and space."
I'm also not sold on the idea that they're always trying to be nice. Sometimes, sure. Sometimes, they're showing off their cooking skills (which host your own party). Sometimes they're sending a message of I don't like you're cooking do here's something edible.
ETA: I think the level of offense taking also depends on what's customary in your circle. If every party except mine is a bring your own hot dish deal, I shouldn't be getting all huffy. In mine it's decidedly not the done thing, so if someone did bring a dish it would be more likely to be making a statement I find offensive.
I'm the fuck out.
And if anyone chooses to eat 5 he casserole, well they obviously don't give a shit about balance!
I'm going to wager MOST people have no nefarious intentions with bringing an unsolicited dish to a party. Look at how many ppl in this thread stated they were raised to bring something to a party, which sometimes is food.
Maybe you have issues with specific ppl in your life that are trying to be passive aggressive and rude. Some people are like that, I know. Just judge everyone on a case by case basis ;-)
"Love is the one thing we're capable of perceiving that transcends time and space."
"Love is the one thing we're capable of perceiving that transcends time and space."
It's shitty and raining out and my back is aching. . .so it's pizza, wine, and Jammies night. We'll it will be soon.
Emmaaa is making me consider a Hot Whiskey though. . .id need lemons and cloves, though.
"Love is the one thing we're capable of perceiving that transcends time and space."
I'm the fuck out.