Just Engaged and Proposals

Did You Pick Out Your Engagement Ring?

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Re: Did You Pick Out Your Engagement Ring?

  • arrrghmateyarrrghmatey member
    500 Love Its 500 Comments First Anniversary First Answer
    edited November 2014
    Nope. I've never been fond of the idea of picking out my own engagement ring....it takes the surprise out of the engagement, and it doesn't give my man a chance to do something on his own regarding our engagement/wedding planning. This worked out great because the proposal really did take me by surprise. I'm not particularly picky, either, so I trust him to make a good decision. My FI did a TON of research, including picking out the best clarity, near-colorlessness, no flourescence, perfect cut of the interior of the diamond so it reflects all of the light directly out of all angles of the ring. He's an engineer so he knows all of this stuff, and I had no idea--he probably picked out a better one than I would have! It's a very classic round solitaire in platinum. And boy, does it sparkle! I love it, he did great :D
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  • I didn't pick out my ring, but I told him exactly what I liked, and his sister went with him to help pick it out.
  • Yes, I picked out my own ring and I'm so happy I did.  I LOVE it!
  • Yes, I did.  Actually I had planned on using an heirloom piece but it turned out that it couldn't be sized right without damaging it due to the intricate design and how far it would have had to be changed.  So when we found that out I told him straight up not to try to surprise me with a ring because while we have been together for a long time and he knows my taste I am very picky and even my mom who is basically my BFF might not have hit the nail on the head on this one.  Your e-ring is something you have to love forever and I didn't want to chance that.  Plus, I knew that I wouldn't be able to exchange a ring once he got one even if I didn't like it.  Not that no one should, just that if he proposed with something I would be attached even if I hated it.  So we went and looked together.  Good thing too because apparently he had it in his head that all girls wanted solitaries.  One of his exs had had a thing for them and had said something about how they were the classic engagement ring (kind of true in a sense I suppose) and that every girl wanted one.  They are pretty on the right person but it's SOOO far from my taste it's funny.  Now he knew better by the time he actually proposed but when we first started talking rings he mentioned solitaries because of the thing his ex had said and I laughed.  They were truly the one style I would have liked the least!  So it's a good thing we talked first and looked together because I would have hated to open a ring box and been sad by what he picked.  Yes, theres something neat about being surprised, but if you know you're picky and know you want something specific then that's often more important.  Plus, I like that it's something we did together.
  • FI surprised me with a ring that was something i never thought id own. he thought outside of box and got something modern instead of traditional. 
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  • When we went ring shopping I picked out two rings I liked..and he picked from those. :) So it was still sort of a surprise because they were two very different styles.
  • We bought my engagement ring and bands together. We had gone shopping together and looked at ideas, but one day we came across this ring at a family jeweler that I basically couldn't live without. They were also getting rid of 4 years worth of inventory to bring in new stuff and all of their current inventory was 80% off! SO we went ahead and got them. He was upset that I wouldn't be surprised, but at the same time he wasn't confident he would pick something I would like and I am the one who has to wear it.  Also, I am not very traditional and I am kind of picky so I'd rather have something that I know I am absolutely in love with because it is such a huge investment.
  • The ring and the band
    dilewis
  • Yup, we went together yesterday after he proposed.

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  • I would have been happy with him selecting the ring and I told him so on several occasions.  However, he wanted me to shop with him.  I did and we went to two stores and I gave him ideas of what I would like.  Actually, that process was good for me to as it formalized to me also what kind of ring I would actually like since I do not ever wear rings.  I thought he would choose based on that information and surprise me.  He didn't and still wanted to shop.  So I took him to a store so I could see David Tutera rings and low and behold they had my ring and his band on sale at 50 and 70% off.  I don't think he was ready for us to actually find the rings.  Oh well.  We put them in separate lay-aways so he could still surprise me with a proposal.

    All of that is good.  The bad thing is that I am engaged (he said for me to call him fiancé)  and I now realize that he thinks of the official proposal as the start of the engagement.  I am planning a wedding and he is planning a proposal.  Where as we were once on the same page and timeline, we are no longer on the same page and timeline.  Factor in a move out of state and things get even more complicated.  I am pushing the date because of the move and he is pausing the date because of the move.

    If I did not shop for the ring then I think this all would have happened differently.

    I am still very happy, just frustrated at times.

  • smalfrie19 your dress is gorgeous.
  • jenni121  A temporary ring is a great idea.  I wish we would have thought of it earlier.
  • I had pinned a couple of ring ideas on pinterest and he secretly checked them out to get me as close to what I wanted as possible, so yes I guess I ended up picking my own ring out but it still had a nice surprise feel to it because I had multiple different styles.  
  • Yes and No

    My fiance gave me a "promise ring" for our first Christmas together which I absolutely loved. It's a 2.5 ct black diamond with another ct in smaller white stones. When we brought it to the jeweler he stated it was a french "cushion cut" from the 1940s. Six years after he asked me what kind of ring I wanted, I told him I had it. So he took the ring back to do his official proposal.
  • JamieLynn913JamieLynn913 Watertown, CT member
    Fifth Anniversary 10 Comments Name Dropper 5 Love Its
    We kind of picked it out together. We knew eventually we would be getting engaged and one night we sat on Pinterest together in bed and just looked at different rings. He told me what he didn't like, and I told him my opinions. What I got was a little bit of both of us, which makes it more sentimental to me.

    hpubride
  • Yes ma'am. I definitely picked out my own ring. Even though we are very down-to-earth people, we both are into fashion and presentation. We knew we wanted a statement piece on my finger so we went shopping and he put a down payment on the "ONE'. The proposal was absolutely a surprise and I wouldn't have had it any other way! :D
  • I didn't, because I had no idea he was going to propose. We had definitely talked about marriage and we were on the same page, but I didn't know when he was going to propose, and to be honest I kind of had it in my mind that eventually he would need some pushing/hinting. Well, it never got to that point--he surprised me at the most perfect moment.
    hpubride
  • Correction--he picked out the diamond (which to me, was perfect) and proposed to me in a temporary ring. Then I got to pick out the real ring.
  • edited December 2014
    Well, long story short I picked out my ring, the second one that is. I sadly lost the original ring that he picked out, thanks to my dog. I think there are pros and cons both ways. Him picking it out is his way of showing you he really knows you and it can be more of a surprise if you have never even really looked at rings. But most guys need the help, that way they have a more educated guess at what you would like. While I loved my first ring, my second ring was just a little more in line with what I really wanted.

    Check out the whole story on my blog. :)

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  • classicalandedgyclassicalandedgy Connecticut member
    Knottie Warrior 100 Love Its 100 Comments Name Dropper
    We picked it together. I did show him examples of several rings that I'd be happy with but ulitimately we picked the one that felt right for us.

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  • We picked it out together. We looked at a couple places. I had it narrowed down to two rings. I asked him which one he liked. Then i said okay I am not here now which one would you pick. He picked the ring out that I really liked.
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