Just Tuesday

cu97tiger · March 2015

@untouchablets - Congratulations on the job offer. Offers are negotiable. If you find that the rates are significantly higher at the new job, ask for a raise that covers those costs. Or ask that those costs be taken on by the company. It is rare that an organization's first offer is their best/only offer. As long as you negotiate respectfully and fairly, it cannot hurt to ask.

@nycgal85 - Ugh. You should really spend some more time on E.

untouchablets · March 2015

cu97tiger said:
@untouchablets - Congratulations on the job offer. Offers are negotiable. If you find that the rates are significantly higher at the new job, ask for a raise that covers those costs. Or ask that those costs be taken on by the company. It is rare that an organization's first offer is their best/only offer. As long as you negotiate respectfully and fairly, it cannot hurt to ask.

The thing is, this is a VERY small business. It's well established, has a GREAT clientele and reputation around town in nearby areas, and I will definitely mention that when we talk, but I understand that there is a limit on what she can offer me in terms of salary. I would be so much happier there though, so I have a LOT to think about.

lmcooper86 · March 2015

I took a crazy-ass phone call and then came back and wondered why I had 32 notifications from this thread...

@nycgal85 - Like everyone else has said, do not B-list. It's incredibly rude. You're either going to have to find a bigger/less expensive venue, up your budget, or cut your guest list. You send one round of invites. The end.

ETF words out of order.

nycgal85 said:

@bethsmiles - we have already cut kids under 18 (with the exception of FI's two first cousins who will be 16 and 13 and our flower girl, best friend's little girl, and ring bearer, the boy I pretty much raised as a nanny). We also are only giving +1s to couples married, engaged, living together, or serious LTR. In terms of who's contributing both our parents are giving us a significant amount of money, so that makes it hard. We are already planning a second event in Ohio for all our family/friends who can't come to NY. There's also this drama with FI's family, they're very close-knit extended family and it could mean destroying family ties if we don't invite these people.

And in that one single round of invitations, you make sure that you are inviting the spouses/fiancé(e)s/life partners/boyfriends/girlfriends of all of your guests by name. Don't give a married or engaged person a +1, put their spouse or fiancé/fiancée's name on the invitation. Aren't sure if they're dating someone? Ask. A +1 is only for someone who is truly 100% single and you only give someone a +1 if you have the space and budget for them to bring someone with them. If space and budget are an issue with your guest list, then you don't have to offer your single guests a +1, just invite the spouses/fiancés/life partners/boyfriends/girlfriends/whatever else they might be called of all of your guests who are in a relationship.

And be careful about the word "serious". Don't judge someone's relationship to be not "serious" based on the length of time the couple has been together or the age of the guest or whatever other "criteria" people try to spout out. If a guest says that they have a spouse/fiancé(e)/life partner/boyfriend/girlfriend then that person should be invited by name on the invitation.

jenjen047 · March 2015

untouchablets said:
She wants to pay me almost twice my current salary and I'd get insurance too, which is pretty much the only think keeping me at my current job. I would say yes in a HEARTBEAT but the only big question mark is insurance. I pay VERY good rates right now, and so if her insurance is significantly more expensive than mine, I can't accept the job. If it's slightly more, I will take it as long as my take home pay is more than what I make now.

first off, congrats! this is exciting news! second...if she is willing to pay you double your current salary, as long as her insurance rates are less than 2x what you are currently paying, you will come out ahead right?

GoldenPenguin · March 2015

I... I just...

untouchablets · March 2015

jenjen047 said:

untouchablets said:
She wants to pay me almost twice my current salary and I'd get insurance too, which is pretty much the only think keeping me at my current job. I would say yes in a HEARTBEAT but the only big question mark is insurance. I pay VERY good rates right now, and so if her insurance is significantly more expensive than mine, I can't accept the job. If it's slightly more, I will take it as long as my take home pay is more than what I make now.
first off, congrats! this is exciting news! second...if she is willing to pay you double your current salary, as long as her insurance rates are less than 2x what you are currently paying, you will come out ahead right?

YES so that is what I'm counting on

My insurance is just REALLY cheap right now so it isn't hard to imagine something else costing twice as much.

bethsmiles · March 2015

nycgal85 said:

@bethsmiles - we have already cut kids under 18 (with the exception of FI's two first cousins who will be 16 and 13 and our flower girl, best friend's little girl, and ring bearer, the boy I pretty much raised as a nanny). We also are only giving +1s to couples married, engaged, living together, or serious LTR. In terms of who's contributing both our parents are giving us a significant amount of money, so that makes it hard. We are already planning a second event in Ohio for all our family/friends who can't come to NY. There's also this drama with FI's family, they're very close-knit extended family and it could mean destroying family ties if we don't invite these people.

Oh my god, don't do this either! This is the one big etiquette faux pas that really makes me see red. You can't invite people to come celebrate your relationship and then not even recognize theirs. You seriously need to go lurk on the etiquette board.

jenjen047 · March 2015

@untouchablets - ahhh ok got it! fingers crossed for you!

Dignity100 · March 2015

@untouchablets - Look at how much insurance costs, factor in 'where would you be happier at' and given your current bills/situation, could you afford to live off X. Sometimes it is about where you'll be happier at. For my current position, I took a pay cut because my quality of life at my old job was non-existent. It does feel like a step back, but then comes the next question of 'what opportunities could come from this'. It's great that you were offered the job and it's great that the pay is good (assuming insurance isn't insanely expensive) - but you have to also do what's best for you.

lmcooper86 · March 2015

@TwoDimes - Ugh. All I can do when you mention your FMIL's crazy antics is a Lady Mary eyeroll. I'm sorry you have to deal with that, even if it's just through someone else like your FI or his cousin

@bethsmiles - We still got paid, just not on the actual payday. The first time it took, no joke, AN EXTRA WEEK for us to get paid. The pay day was supposed to be Christmas Eve, so there were holidays in the way and whatever other nonsense. But there were also a few business days in there; if it had been the payroll company's fault I think they would have dealt with it first thing on their first business day back. Just was very fishy. And the second time we got paid 2 days late. It was a nightmare, because FI and I weren't very serious yet and I was on a single income, so not getting paid was a huge issue. I should also note that this was 2 pay periods in 3 months. Not okay.

@eilis1228 - Your wedding is in October? Right? June is maybe a little bit early, BUT if a lot of family is already making a trip and people have a lot of plans over the summer it might be difficult to get another date that works well for all of your VIPs. Also, I'm glad you (probably) don't have strep; that was my first thought when you were talking about your sickness. And FI and I have been watching Better Call Saul! It's good, but there have been a couple of less exciting episodes. I think we'll keep watching because we love the characters.

@Swazzle - I totally thought I'd gotten a flat from a pothole last week. The roads in Toronto are brutal this time of year because of the freeze/thaw/freeze cycle, and there are a couple of nasty ones if I drive to work. The one I hit actually hurt.

lavenderfields13 · March 2015

@Eilis1228 I have a polar HRM too- it worked right for about a year and then started doing exactly what yours is doing. I just don't use it anymore since it's such a PITA. Buying a new one isn't high on my priority list right now so I haven't looked into other ones yet.

@nycgal85 I don't mean to jump all over you too but yeah - no B-listing and invite everyone's SO by name. We did not give actual plus 1s to truly single guests but I checked with every single unmarried guest to see if they were dating someone and asked for their name to add to the invite. Leave a little room in your guest count for SOs too. Our guest list increased when I was getting ready to address invites and found out some people had SOs that I wasn't aware of. We still had extra room so it's not an issue.

lavenderfields13 · March 2015

bethsmiles said:

nycgal85 said:

@bethsmiles - we have already cut kids under 18 (with the exception of FI's two first cousins who will be 16 and 13 and our flower girl, best friend's little girl, and ring bearer, the boy I pretty much raised as a nanny). We also are only giving +1s to couples married, engaged, living together, or serious LTR. In terms of who's contributing both our parents are giving us a significant amount of money, so that makes it hard. We are already planning a second event in Ohio for all our family/friends who can't come to NY. There's also this drama with FI's family, they're very close-knit extended family and it could mean destroying family ties if we don't invite these people.

Oh my god, don't do this either! This is the one big etiquette faux pas that really makes me see red. You can't invite people to come celebrate your relationship and then not even recognize theirs. You seriously need to go lurk on the etiquette board.

I missed the second bolded...is the second event a PPD??

bethsmiles · March 2015

lavenderfields13 said:

bethsmiles said:

nycgal85 said:

@bethsmiles - we have already cut kids under 18 (with the exception of FI's two first cousins who will be 16 and 13 and our flower girl, best friend's little girl, and ring bearer, the boy I pretty much raised as a nanny). We also are only giving +1s to couples married, engaged, living together, or serious LTR. In terms of who's contributing both our parents are giving us a significant amount of money, so that makes it hard. We are already planning a second event in Ohio for all our family/friends who can't come to NY. There's also this drama with FI's family, they're very close-knit extended family and it could mean destroying family ties if we don't invite these people.

Oh my god, don't do this either! This is the one big etiquette faux pas that really makes me see red. You can't invite people to come celebrate your relationship and then not even recognize theirs. You seriously need to go lurk on the etiquette board.
I missed the second bolded...is the second event a PPD??

I read it more as an AHR which is technically etiquette approved but I still think they are pretty unnecessary.

lmcooper86 · March 2015

lavenderfields13 said:

bethsmiles said:

nycgal85 said:

@bethsmiles - we have already cut kids under 18 (with the exception of FI's two first cousins who will be 16 and 13 and our flower girl, best friend's little girl, and ring bearer, the boy I pretty much raised as a nanny). We also are only giving +1s to couples married, engaged, living together, or serious LTR. In terms of who's contributing both our parents are giving us a significant amount of money, so that makes it hard. We are already planning a second event in Ohio for all our family/friends who can't come to NY. There's also this drama with FI's family, they're very close-knit extended family and it could mean destroying family ties if we don't invite these people.

Oh my god, don't do this either! This is the one big etiquette faux pas that really makes me see red. You can't invite people to come celebrate your relationship and then not even recognize theirs. You seriously need to go lurk on the etiquette board.
I missed the second bolded...is the second event a PPD??

Yeah...I was looking at that and didn't know if I wanted to go there...but...

@nycgal85 - What's the plan for this second event in Ohio? Is it just going to be a big party for anyone who couldn't come to NY for your wedding? Or are you planning on wearing your wedding dress/saying vows/having a bridal party/any of the other wedding things?

lavenderfields13 · March 2015

bethsmiles said:

lavenderfields13 said:

bethsmiles said:

nycgal85 said:

@bethsmiles - we have already cut kids under 18 (with the exception of FI's two first cousins who will be 16 and 13 and our flower girl, best friend's little girl, and ring bearer, the boy I pretty much raised as a nanny). We also are only giving +1s to couples married, engaged, living together, or serious LTR. In terms of who's contributing both our parents are giving us a significant amount of money, so that makes it hard. We are already planning a second event in Ohio for all our family/friends who can't come to NY. There's also this drama with FI's family, they're very close-knit extended family and it could mean destroying family ties if we don't invite these people.

Oh my god, don't do this either! This is the one big etiquette faux pas that really makes me see red. You can't invite people to come celebrate your relationship and then not even recognize theirs. You seriously need to go lurk on the etiquette board.
I missed the second bolded...is the second event a PPD??
I read it more as an AHR which is technically etiquette approved but I still think they are pretty unnecessary.

Agree. If people can't make it to the actual wedding they'll get over it.

AlPacina · March 2015

@bethsmiles - we have already cut kids under 18 (with the exception of FI's two first cousins who will be 16 and 13 and our flower girl, best friend's little girl, and ring bearer, the boy I pretty much raised as a nanny). We also are only giving +1s to couples married, engaged, living together, or serious LTR. In terms of who's contributing both our parents are giving us a significant amount of money, so that makes it hard. We are already planning a second event in Ohio for all our family/friends who can't come to NY. There's also this drama with FI's family, they're very close-knit extended family and it could mean destroying family ties if we don't invite these people.

Oh my god, don't do this either! This is the one big etiquette faux pas that really makes me see red. You can't invite people to come celebrate your relationship and then not even recognize theirs. You seriously need to go lurk on the etiquette board.
I missed the second bolded...is the second event a PPD??
B-listing, excluding SO's who aren't "serious" enough, a PPD... what's next, a cash bar?

That's just how people do it in *such and such a place*! It's all normal and acceptable THERE!

eilis1228 · March 2015

@lmcooper86 Yep, wedding is in October, so June is a little early for a shower. I think my mom's logic with saving our OOT family a trip is solid, and I don't really get a say in the shower anyway. I guess I'll just keep all of the gifts in the garage until after the wedding? That's the only downside to the earlier-than-normal shower. Also, yeah, I'm really hoping it's not strep. It still hurts to swallow, but no where near as bad as it did yesterday. I also don't think my fever is high enough for strep, but we'll see. With Better Call Saul, we're maybe 3 episodes behind? But yes, I agree that so far there have been a few really slow episodes. We love the characters too, so we've continued watching.

@lavenderfields13 That's about as long as I've had my polar. Very interesting! I'm glad it's not just me.

jenjen047 · March 2015

@nycgal85 - agreed about 2nd event in ohio. also isnt this going to discourage OH guests from making the trip to NY for the wedding? if i were planning on flying from OH to NY for your wedding and then found out you were hosting an event in OH, id prob feel like whats the point when i can just wait for the OH event?
invite the people you want at your wedding to your wedding. if they can come, they will come. if they have to miss it, they have to miss it. you wouldnt throw 2 birthday parties for your kid just because some of their friends couldnt make the first one.

cu97tiger · March 2015

untouchablets said:

cu97tiger said:
@untouchablets - Congratulations on the job offer. Offers are negotiable. If you find that the rates are significantly higher at the new job, ask for a raise that covers those costs. Or ask that those costs be taken on by the company. It is rare that an organization's first offer is their best/only offer. As long as you negotiate respectfully and fairly, it cannot hurt to ask.
The thing is, this is a VERY small business. It's well established, has a GREAT clientele and reputation around town in nearby areas, and I will definitely mention that when we talk, but I understand that there is a limit on what she can offer me in terms of salary. I would be so much happier there though, so I have a LOT to think about.

There is always a limit on what someone can offer you. I'm just saying that part of the reason (not the whole reason, but definitely part) why women are paid less than men is because we don't ask for more. Above, you sound like you're saying that you are so grateful for what they are offering you that you would hate to ask for more. Like I said, if you conduct the conversation respectfully and fairly, asking for what you want or know you need will get you one of three things: 1) what you asked for, 2) not quite what you asked for but more than you were getting before or 3) no change in the offer. It's a win/win situation to ask.

Peaseblossom55 · March 2015

@swazzle Boo for having to work on Friday I figured you would be off since the market is closed.

The mini pig thing is actually pretty bad when you really dive into it. It's my current thing I'm annoying my husband about. I think 2 months ago I had a serious conversation with him on justified reasons why I should quit my job and why I would succeed being a circus performer.

I'd be pretty hurt and offended if before H & I were married someone determined for us how serious our relationship was by not inviting one of us to their wedding.

jenjen047 · March 2015

Peaseblossom55 said:
The mini pig thing is actually pretty bad when you really dive into it. It's my current thing I'm annoying my husband about. I think 2 months ago I had a serious conversation with him on justified reasons why I should quit my job and why I would succeed being a circus performer.

im confused....have you decided against a mini pig then, or are you really just annoying H in jest?

lavenderfields13 · March 2015

AlPacina said:

TwoDimes said:

lavenderfields13 said:

bethsmiles said:

nycgal85 said:

@bethsmiles - we have already cut kids under 18 (with the exception of FI's two first cousins who will be 16 and 13 and our flower girl, best friend's little girl, and ring bearer, the boy I pretty much raised as a nanny). We also are only giving +1s to couples married, engaged, living together, or serious LTR. In terms of who's contributing both our parents are giving us a significant amount of money, so that makes it hard. We are already planning a second event in Ohio for all our family/friends who can't come to NY. There's also this drama with FI's family, they're very close-knit extended family and it could mean destroying family ties if we don't invite these people.

Oh my god, don't do this either! This is the one big etiquette faux pas that really makes me see red. You can't invite people to come celebrate your relationship and then not even recognize theirs. You seriously need to go lurk on the etiquette board.
I missed the second bolded...is the second event a PPD??
B-listing, excluding SO's who aren't "serious" enough, a PPD... what's next, a cash bar?

That's just how people do it in *such and such a place*! It's all normal and acceptable THERE!

Confession: I was definitely one of those people who thought cash bars were totally normal because well..they are pretty normal in my circle. I honestly never thought of it as rude since I had never been to a wedding with an open bar up until a couple of years ago. People have said we're insane for even considering an open bar (so I stopped talking about it- I had only talked about it with close family) that's how common cash is. I didn't get why it was rude until I headed over to E so I definitely encourage people to read the E board!

We decided to do beer and wine for our wedding since that's what we could afford and venue told us we could do whatever type of bar we wanted. Stupid me, I thought they would take down all other alcohol and didn't realize that since they're a country club they will not remove what we're not paying for and people can still purchase it if they'd like. We'll be making a sign listing what we're hosting but I feel crappy about the whole thing now- I was actually trying to do it the right way. 99% of our guests have all had cash bars themselves so won't think anything of it but it's the principle to me now

You can flame me now and take some heat off nygal

bethsmiles · March 2015

@lavenderfields13 - From what I've read on E, you aren't doing anything against etiquette. It would actually be rude of your guests to choose to pay for a drink not listed on your sign indicating what is hosted.

lavenderfields13 · March 2015

bethsmiles said:
@lavenderfields13 - From what I've read on E, you aren't doing anything against etiquette. It would actually be rude of your guests to choose to pay for a drink not listed on your sign indicating what is hosted.

Yeah I did go to E when I had the dilemma too and the general consensus was the sign listing what's hosted is good enough. I guess I was just disappointed that the venue couldn't take the alcohol down so it would be more obvious! Oh well, you live and learn.

nycgal85 · March 2015

Woah woah woah.....this must be me being naive but I didn't in ANY WAY shape or form assume that +1 meant that their name wasn't on the invite!! I just meant a couple/SO.

In terms of the thing in Ohio, this is to placate my mother and grandmother who want us to invite people we can't afford to. It was my grandmother's idea because she has friends that could no way come to NY and are not invited to the wedding to see us and celebrate. I'm thinking of probably something at my parents house, maybe getting food catered as a treat. It's in NO WAY a replacement for the wedding.

And in all honesty, and please don't all pounce on me, but I don't give a f*ck about etiquette.

We're content with our decisions on SOs. We are going to try to cut down the guest list to something we can afford, and I'm trying to deal with my own very delicate and dysfunctional family situation on top of FI's massive family. If I had known that I was going to create some sort of uproar here.....

ETA: I don't know what the hell any of these acronyms (PPD ARH) are either, so I give up. I'm already stressed out enough, now I'm literally having a panic attack because of all of this.

Swazzle · March 2015

nycgal85 said:
Woah woah woah.....this must be me being naive but I didn't in ANY WAY shape or form assume that +1 meant that their name wasn't on the invite!! I just meant a couple/SO.

In terms of the thing in Ohio, this is to placate my mother and grandmother who want us to invite people we can't afford to. It was my grandmother's idea because she has friends that could no way come to NY and are not invited to the wedding to see us and celebrate. I'm thinking of probably something at my parents house, maybe getting food catered as a treat. It's in NO WAY a replacement for the wedding.

And in all honesty, and please don't all pounce on me, but I don't give a f*ck about etiquette.

We're content with our decisions on SOs. We are going to try to cut down the guest list to something we can afford, and I'm trying to deal with my own very delicate and dysfunctional family situation on top of FI's massive family. If I had known that I was going to create some sort of uproar here.....

We aren't going to read all the shitty things that you're planning and just ignore it or nod along with you. Sorry but this board doesn't work that way. Some of us DO give a fuck about etiquette and hosted/are hosting proper events accordingly.

WeddingBee has a smiliar "I don't give a fuck about etiquette" attitude. Maybe you'd be better suited there.

lavenderfields13 · March 2015

TwoDimes said:
@lavenderfields13, it's the same way where I am: cash bars are very very common. I've been to more weddings with a cash bar than with an open bar (or limited bar, or no bar, etc). Obviously, just because it's common doesn't mean it's right. We have also had quite a few relatives comment on how it's "crazy" that we are hosting the bar all night at our wedding. Well, go ahead and think I'm crazy. Why do you care...? YOU'RE GETTING FREE DRINKS! Haha

I'm sure there will be quite an uproar when we don't do the dollar dance too.... another thing that's common around here.

SITB

I know - this is what gets me! I'd be excited about going to a wedding with open bar since they're so rare! lol

Peaseblossom55 · March 2015

jenjen047 said:

Peaseblossom55 said:
The mini pig thing is actually pretty bad when you really dive into it. It's my current thing I'm annoying my husband about. I think 2 months ago I had a serious conversation with him on justified reasons why I should quit my job and why I would succeed being a circus performer.
im confused....have you decided against a mini pig then, or are you really just annoying H in jest?

Annoying H in jest :-)

labro · March 2015

nycgal85 said:
Woah woah woah.....this must be me being naive but I didn't in ANY WAY shape or form assume that +1 meant that their name wasn't on the invite!! I just meant a couple/SO.

In terms of the thing in Ohio, this is to placate my mother and grandmother who want us to invite people we can't afford to. It was my grandmother's idea because she has friends that could no way come to NY and are not invited to the wedding to see us and celebrate. I'm thinking of probably something at my parents house, maybe getting food catered as a treat. It's in NO WAY a replacement for the wedding.

And in all honesty, and please don't all pounce on me, but I don't give a f*ck about etiquette.

We're content with our decisions on SOs. We are going to try to cut down the guest list to something we can afford, and I'm trying to deal with my own very delicate and dysfunctional family situation on top of FI's massive family. If I had known that I was going to create some sort of uproar here.....

I'm just picturing this right now.

Honestly, what you basically just said was "I don't give a fuck about my guests". Etiquette isn't some old-fashioned, out of date, set of rules. It's about having the mind-set of guest comfort first, me last. B-listing, not inviting SOs, inviting people to an AHR (at home reception) that weren't even invited to the wedding, etc. are all insults to your guests in one way or another. We're just trying to help you from doing some sort of etiquette faux pas and offending your nearest and dearest with your misguided plans.

You seem to be under a LOT of stress and pressure really early on in the wedding planning process. You need to start practicing the word "No" and learn the art of bean-dipping now. Invite grandma's friends? No. "But sweetheart, I love them so and they just want to see you get married." "I'm sorry grandma, but we can only afford so many people and we'd rather keep the wedding small". Or your FMIL's second cousin twice removed? No. Sorry FMIL, we can only afford so many people and we'd rather keep the wedding small anyway.

These things really are not that hard. Everyone else has a whacked out family situation, everyone else has drama in their lives, we've all gone through it an,d made it out on the other end without having to b-list, without having to cut SOs, etc. You can fix these things now because you haven't sent out invitations, you don't even have an official date yet. You won't be ostracized because Great Aunt Mildred wasn't invited to the wedding. These people don't need to know the details of your guest list! Yes, you have some problems because your parents are paying for part of the wedding. But you can fix this by either refusing the money and scaling back your wedding to what you can afford to host, or having a heart to heart with your mom.

Hummingbird125 · March 2015

TwoDimes said:

nycgal85 said:
Woah woah woah.....this must be me being naive but I didn't in ANY WAY shape or form assume that +1 meant that their name wasn't on the invite!! I just meant a couple/SO.

In terms of the thing in Ohio, this is to placate my mother and grandmother who want us to invite people we can't afford to. It was my grandmother's idea because she has friends that could no way come to NY and are not invited to the wedding to see us and celebrate. I'm thinking of probably something at my parents house, maybe getting food catered as a treat. It's in NO WAY a replacement for the wedding.

And in all honesty, and please don't all pounce on me, but I don't give a f*ck about etiquette.

We're content with our decisions on SOs. We are going to try to cut down the guest list to something we can afford, and I'm trying to deal with my own very delicate and dysfunctional family situation on top of FI's massive family. If I had known that I was going to create some sort of uproar here.....
Annnnnnnnd you lost me.

co-signed. Hummingbird125

@nycgal85 - Etiquette is about being polite and respectful to your guests and about being a good host. If you don't give a fuck about that, I'm not sure you're going to get much advice you like on these boards. We love talking about/planning/helping others plan/listening to people vent about/getting excited for - wedding details, but if you don't want to even stick to basic polite hosting rules, you're going to have a lot of haters.

I'm going to give you the benefit of the doubt because I'm sure you didn't even know that some things you were planning were no bueno, but I'm going to tell you that you really really should spend a LOT of time lurking (that means just reading, no posting) on the Etiquette board and see what you learn. Etiquette is NOT stuffy outdated rules that no one cares about anymore, they are simple rules to follow to make sure you're treating all of your guests the way they should be treated. I joined this board over a year before I got engaged, so I had a lot of time to soak up all the good information before I started planning my wedding, but it isn't too late for you.

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