Non-wedding, LONG post, southern birthday post-party woes... Am I crazy?

Maggie0829 · April 2015

pinkrevenge said:

lovegood90 said:

amelisha said:
So...what was the acceptable answer here?

"No, you're not crazy, you're definitely not acting like a prejudiced, immature, drama obsessed white girl and those Mexicans are the crazy ones, how dare they say anything negative about your cooking, don't they know that that's the kind of thing that gives a nice Southern woman the vapors? She should have fallen at your feet to apologize and gotten you a fainting couch so you could recover from this grievous insult to your VERY BEING and your value as a woman!"

Did I get it?

ETA: I think you need this.
I really hope this is a thing.
It's another name for a chaise lounge.

lovegood90 · April 2015

pinkrevenge said:

lovegood90 said:

amelisha said:
So...what was the acceptable answer here?

"No, you're not crazy, you're definitely not acting like a prejudiced, immature, drama obsessed white girl and those Mexicans are the crazy ones, how dare they say anything negative about your cooking, don't they know that that's the kind of thing that gives a nice Southern woman the vapors? She should have fallen at your feet to apologize and gotten you a fainting couch so you could recover from this grievous insult to your VERY BEING and your value as a woman!"

Did I get it?

ETA: I think you need this.
I really hope this is a thing.
It's another name for a chaise lounge.

Oh, haha! That's too funny, I've never heard of it being called that.

novella1186 · April 2015

Since I'm bored, I will try to clarify a few things for you:

jwaggs said:

Long time lurker, didn’t know where else to ask a question…
I don’t want mean comments about anyone’s behavior, just want to know if I’m
crazy for feeling the way I do. Non-wedding talk, will try to make it short as
possible but it’s long!

5 people involved: Me, BF, BF’s bestie (house-owner), BF’s
bestie’s GF (house-resider), my bestie

For BF’s big blowout birthday party, BF’s bestie offered up
his house/land for us to have a LOT of people out, plus lots of room for outdoor
games. Even though we got other offers for where we could have the party, we
went with that because they are such good friends. (This was about 6 weeks
ago.)

Flashback, 4 weeks ago Saturday – we meet BF’s bestie’s new
GF. We were not introduced, and I didn’t know her name until they were official
on Facebook this past Wednesday. Since we were not introduced, we assumed this
was his “flavor of the day” -- that's pretty damn mean and condescending. Regardless of what this guy's relationship with her is, she's still a human being and still deserves to be treated with a basic level of kindness and respect, just like anyone else. (to put nicely,) so it was a surprise to everyone
in our group of friends when she moved in with him 2 days later.

Not trying to brag, but BF and I really did bust our booties
to make sure everything would go great on the day of. We went to set up
everything at 10 AM for the party at 6 PM, I cooked mac and cheese, mashed
potatoes, stuffed jalapenos, cookies, and watermelon, and my mom brought beans,
chips, dips, and brownies. Bestie brought cheesecake (his birthday cake.)
(Bestie was large part in party-planning.) (The meat was brought by the men –
crawfish, gator, brisket, and ribs.) Don't care.

The morning of, as we were prepping, house-owner was a
totally @$$hole to me! Very few people get along with him, but I always
tolerated him for the fact that he is BF’s bestfriend… He spoke condescendingly
to me, acted like I was a child, and when I was explaining something to him
about our margarita machine rental, in front of the rental people, he said, “I
don’t even understand what you’re saying, but I don’t care.”You could have asked him then and there if everything was ok, rather than letting it stew and blowing up later, or you could have just brushed it off and ignore his asshole-ish behavior. Either way, sounds like you held a grudge for the night and waited for an inopportune moment to blow up about it, which is petty. If he's always a jerk, then who cares? If he's not usually a jerk, then something must have been bothering him.

When I was preparing food in the house, I accidentally
called his GF by the wrong name (I mixed up 2 letters in her name, wasn’t an ex’s
name or anything.) House-owner corrected me nicely, and asked her the question
I had asked him, and she obviously had heard me get her name wrong and rudely
answered the question. I let it go.

After food, drinks, and some games, I was finally having fun
not worrying about the food and set up. I met with BF, who admitted he had
never eaten anything through the whole evening because he was too busy. I took
him in the house to make him a plate, where some people were hanging out. I
made him a plate of mac and cheese and mashed potatoes while I heated up
brisket, and the house-owner’s GF said, “I would put some salt and pepper on
the mac and cheese and mashed potatoes if I were you, they aren’t very good and
I didn’t like them.” (This, I clearly heard – she was standing next to me.) People are allowed to have opinions about food. Even negative opinions. This was a pretty mild comment and definitely not anything to flip out about. Be irritated for a minute because you felt she was rude to you, and then move on. Sounds like you weren't even nice to her at any point. If someone is unkind to me in my own home, we have a big problem.

I said, “That is kind of insulting… You don’t know who made
those, and it was me, and I’m standing right here.” No need to get all worked up and snappy with this girl. Seriously. It was immature of you to start this.

She said, “Well, I meant that I LIKED them, but…”

I have no idea what she tried to back track and say, because
smoke was already pouring from my ears. If you don’t like someone’s food – DON’T
EAT IT. I told BF I was going to step outside and would be back, I had said all
that needed to be said, and didn’t want it to escalate any more.

I stepped outside, spoke to bestie about what happened, and
she told me that earlier in the night, she had a conversation with house-owner’s
GF, in which she thanked house-owner’s GF for letting us throw the party at
their house, and she replied with an eye roll, “Well, it wasn’t really my idea…” So at this point you decided to go gossip about this girl, while you're a guest in her home, and spread drama. You pulled another person into the drama, and escalated a minor incident over a comment about food? Really?

When that conversation was relayed to me, I no longer felt
welcome at their home, even though it was a party I was hosting. But because I
did not hear her say that, I was not mad at her, only upset that I felt that
our party wasn’t wanted at their place. I only wished that we had been told
sooner.

As I was walking back to the house, BF walked out and said
some choice words about the GF who offended me (and he is NEVER one to bash on
a friend, but he completely was, like I had never heard him.) When I relayed
what I had heard, he said that we would pack up our stuff and leave (it was
after midnight at this point, and many other people had left, so no scene had
to be made.)So now your drunk boyfriend is jumping into the drama and insulting this girl.

As I was getting our cooler from the shop, house-owner walks
in and asks me if everything is okay, and I said “Not really” as I was walking
out the door. If you thought something was wrong, you should have stopped to discuss it with him right here. He wanted to talk to you and make sure everything was ok, but you were passive-aggressive, vague, and dismissive. Thus spreading the drama further, and now pulling a 5th person into it. He relayed the message into the kitchen (where bestie was standing)
that I was throwing things around the shop, huffing and puffing, rolling my
eyes at him, etc. You don't even know if he actually said this stuff, because you weren't there. More gossip going around. And if he did say it, that was kind of drama-llama of him, but can you really blame him for being irritated with your reaction when he asked if things were ok? I would be honest if I did any of these things, but I really
was trying to leave without causing a scene, and I was already walking out the door
as he was walking in and asked me the question.

When that was relayed back to me and BF, his exact words
were, “We will go settle this right now.” (Uh oh… didn’t know what that meant.)

He called house owner out of the house, so it was just us 3,
and asked what the deal was and what was going on. I am paraphrasing the
conversation, although the sentences were said… I know I’m forgetting part of
the conversation. House owner: ‘What are you talking about? Is there something
going on?’ *Me and BF stare* House owner: ‘Ohhhh, yeah, [house-owner’s GF] said
you got upset that she said your food wasn’t that good, but she said she was
sorry and felt bad.’ Me: ‘Not really an apology if she doesn’t say it to me.’
House owner: ‘Well, you shouldn’t get mad about that.’ Me: ‘I’m not mad about
that, I have heard that she wasn’t cool with us having this party out here.’ HO:
‘Well, this is MY house, and she doesn’t have a say.’ Sounds like he's telling you guys that you are NOT unwelcome at his house, so there's actually no issue with that. Me: ‘I understand that,
but you have to realize how uncomfortable that makes us feel out here.’ HO: ‘Well,
who told you that she said that?’ Me: ‘That doesn’t matter, I’m not mad that she
said it, I’m saying if there was a problem, it should have been made clear to
us before the party.’ HO: ‘Well, if you won’t tell who told you, that how do I
know that it’s true?’ Me: ‘So you’re saying I made it up?’ HO: ‘I’ll get [HO
GF] up here right now and we will talk about this like adults.’ Me: ‘Sure, call
her up here!’

(At some point in this conversation, he also said, “[HO GF]
doesn’t know how to talk to drunk people… I had 4 8oz margaritas from 2 PM-12
AM, so no, I would not say I was drunk… At all… Or even had a buzz… Because I
was the DD for BF)

He calls her from the campfire, where she is sitting and
drinking from the margarita machine I paid for…I assume you paid for this thing so that other people can drink from it. No idea why you even mention this.

HO: ‘Did you say something to someone that you weren’t cool
with the party being here?’ Never needed to go this far. And I can understand someone being irritated that there's a huge blow-out party going on at their house that they had no say-so in. She's allowed to be irritated without it being a direct, personal insult to you. You don't get to control other people's feelings on things. It's not like she walked up to you and said you were not welcome there or something.

[This is the part during a rap song when it’s edited and all
you hear are “bleep”s… Calling me vicious names, yelling at all 3 of us, “talking
it out like an adult”]

BF finally steps in and tells her to calm down, I can’t get
a sentence out, finally her BF shoves her into the house, accusing me of
upsetting her (at this point, no one has yelled except for house-owner and his
GF… at each other.) I said that I couldn’t explain because she wouldn’t let me
get a word in, and she rips the door back open to yell at me, “Then finish what
you were ******* saying!”

I raised my voice to say, “No, you walked away and finished
this!”

House-owner said that they were going to bed, but I said I
was going to get my stuff out of the kitchen and we would leave. My girlfriends
helped me clean the kitchen and take my stuff to the car, all the while we can
hear the 2 of them screaming at each other in the back bedroom, and finally
house-owner’s sister comes out and asked me what happened (I have been friends
with her for about 10-15 years). I was completely calm and explained what
happened, and she also said that the GF was sorry that she insulted my food.
She then explained that she is only 19 (???) and has had a rough life, been
kicked out of her parents’ house and already been to jail, that that’s just the
way she is, very blunt, etc. I said I was only upset about the food comment,
but after HO and his GF had treated me throughout the day already, we truly
didn’t feel comfortable being there and we were ready to leave. We left soon
after…
this is all dumb, immature drama.

By the time I got home, HO had posted a Facebook status… “All
that was said were your mashed potatoes and mac and cheese were bland, no need
to tell lies and cause drama!”He's definitely being an immature drama llama with that , but who cares. His bullshit is not your problem.

I ignored it, the next morning I posted a thank you to
everyone who helped out (including him for letting us use his place.) He
commented that everything was great until the drama at the end of the night, it
would be nice if adults would just be adults and talk their problems out
(Remember the night before when we called her up to talk to us and she started
screaming and cussing? Yeah…)

He sent me a long message on facebook that said my drama was
completely uncalled for, it was dumb to get upset that she didn’t like my food,
and that I shouldn’t have made up a lie to start drama and say she didn’t want
us there. I agree with him. Also shouldn’t have caused a rift between BF and HO.

At this point, I truly believe it is a man vs. woman thing.
I don’t think a man will ever understand what it is to have her food insulted
by another woman.Sexist gross attitude to have I could defend myself to him all day (as a woman,) and he will
defend her (as a man.) Am I crazy for getting upset about these things? Should
I feel bad? BF acts like they will get over it, they are guys, but he has
publicly called me out on FB twice now (without tagging me, but of course
everyone knows it is me.) Is it a southern woman thing to be upset that her cooking was insulted?No, it's an immature nonsense thing. The comment was nothing. Get over it.

Maybe it is a cultural difference: BF and I are Caucasian,
HO and his GF are Mexican. Racist. Sorry but none of what happened is a cultural thing. It was a bunch of drunk "adults" acting like dramatic idiots. Also, both guys are 29, I am 24, she is 19… I have
heard that her age just makes her immature, but I’m just trying to not be crazy
myself…

I hope that helps get some kind of sense through to you, OP, cuz that was fucking exhausting.

MairePoppy · April 2015

What you have described is a stupid drunken brawl. If you were sober when you participated in it, you were cheating..

I like to top my mac'n cheese with smoked paprika and French's Onion Rings. Never use American 'cheese.'

littlepep · April 2015

ohannabelle said:

blabla89 said:

ohannabelle said:
I think the solution would be about a teaspoon of dry ground mustard, and a half teaspoon of finely minced garlic, added to the cheese sauce. I rarely add additional salt to the macaroni and cheese, but find the mustard gives the cheddar a nice sharp flavor that isn't obvious or overwhelming.

If you didn't use cheddar, but used American processed cheese, than it's absolutely beyond me, and I would have to agree that you were completely in the wrong.
I rarely disagree with Annabelle but this is one of those times. Clearly the solution is bacon.

http://leitesculinaria.com/25207/recipes-bacon-cheddar-macaroni-cheese.html
You are absolutely 100% correct. I always do a topping of crumbled bacon and at home, a sweet onion, chopped and caramelized, and then more cheese on top. (At potlucks, I'll often skip the caramelized onion, because a surprising lot of people don't care for it.) It bakes into this incredible crunchy rich brown top, so good that evil people sneak into the kitchen and pick it off and eat it, which pisses off the next person who wants their fair share.
And yes to SouthernBelle. Smoked Gouda is a fantastic addition, and Gruyere is my favorite.

I can't believe I haven't thought of onions before! I love that idea. I usually do a crust of panko, butter and more cheese. it's more of a crumble than a crust I guess.

ETF spelling.

Heffalump · April 2015

blabla89 · April 2015

YOU GUYS. I am craving mac and cheese so bad right now but I already at 500 calories worth of pad thai. #firstworldproblems

Dreamergirl8812 · April 2015

"I don't even know what you're saying, but I don't care."

That's so funny because that's what I was thinking the whole time I read that story.

chibiyui · April 2015

NowIamMrsKlein · April 2015

Man do I ever want mac and cheese right now...a little gruyere, a little white chedder. A lot of bacon.... ou! and with a panko-parmesan topping.

Well if I gained anything from this thread (besides some rage because of blatant sexism and racism) its what I am having for supper tonight!

littlepep · April 2015

TNDancer · April 2015

I am currently loving adding just a teaspoon of truffle oil to the mac n cheese. I feel so fancy.

ohannabelle · April 2015

jwaggs said:
The best part was when I said I didn't want mean comments and got them anyway Keep em coming, already got insulted a few times over the weekend... Women on women crime - no wonder I don't post on this too often! Thanks for more insults after a bad weekend! Keep em coming!

Did you want glitter and pink unicorn fluff blown up your ass?

That doesn't happen here.

Truth happens, quite often.

Here's truth: The moment you raise your voice and start bickering and bitching in public, you're wrong. It doesn't matter what lead up to that. If you're publicly fighting with someone, you need to grow the fuck up and handle things like an adult, because only 14 year old drama llamas indulge in public tantrums.

Unacceptable public behavior.

Even if she had personally insulted your face, or your clothing, or your family, you politely smile, say, Really? Thank you so much for sharing your opinion, I'll have to think about that later, or some such thing, and then you go about your business of being the sweetest and nicest and most well mannered girl in the room, and have the satisfaction of knowing that nobody can fault your behavior, while anybody who does looks like a rude childish bitch.

Nobody wins a shit flinging match. All participants leave stinking.

Blergbot · April 2015

Hipsterbaby is raising his eyebrows at you, lady.

P.S. Add some green chile to your mac and cheese for a nice kick.

kvruns · April 2015

ChemFanatic25 said:

I had to stop reading. Chill pills need to be passed out like pez dispensers to the entire lot of you. There isn't a single person in this who wasn't acting like a total ass.

I feel like I just watched a Family Guy episode that was nothing but animated buttholes farting. And near the end of what I could stomach I was seeing Jersey Shore in my head.

I just realized that her username is one of the girls from jersey shore, right?
Jwoww, is from the Jersey Shore OP is close, but not quite.
Like not even a minute ago I could have sworn OP's username said jwoww#s. I must be going crazy. Am I going crazy? I should probably make a whole bunch of racial and gender generalizations to make my side receive more empathy - that's a sure sign of crazy talk.

It was definitely jwoww# earlier

yogapants · April 2015

There's no way you're a long-time lurker, because a long-time lurker wouldn't make a thread like this. If you had lurked here for even a week you'd know that this would not be well received. And yeah, her username was briefly jwoww like Jersey Shore.

VulgarGirl · April 2015

My Mexican wife is always telling me to add more hot sauce to food.

Clearly she, and our dragon baby, hate me.

Kahlyla · April 2015

jwaggs said:

I had 4 8oz margaritas from 2 PM-12
AM... Because I
was the DD for BF)

littlepep · April 2015

MagicInk said:
My Mexican wife is always telling me to add more hot sauce to food.

Clearly she, and our dragon baby, hate me.

HA

VulgarGirl · April 2015

littlepep said:

MagicInk said:
My Mexican wife is always telling me to add more hot sauce to food.

Clearly she, and our dragon baby, hate me.
HA

Yep that's my future kid.

climbingsingle · April 2015

Well, let's see. Your post is sexist, racist and you clearly don't know what it means to be a DD. For the future, that means you don't drink at all.

You overreacted and I think you should be embarrassed about the way you behaved.

flbride2015 · April 2015

MagicInk said:

littlepep said:

MagicInk said:
My Mexican wife is always telling me to add more hot sauce to food.

Clearly she, and our dragon baby, hate me.
HA

Yep that's my future kid.

Mine too. Except my future kid will also have a bottle of Adobo on the side with his Siracha

buttercup1958 · April 2015

Everyone in this situation sounds really stupid. I'm not going to go explain why because all other pps have it covered. I love lobster in my mac and cheese, plus bread crumbs!

PrettyGirlLost · April 2015

jwaggs said:
The best part was when I said I didn't want mean comments and got them anyway Keep em coming, already got insulted a few times over the weekend... Women on women crime - no wonder I don't post on this too often! Thanks for more insults after a bad weekend! Keep em coming!

Actually the best part was when you claimed to have been a lurker, which means you should know A. how we tend to respond to stupidity, useless drama, and immaturity and B. how much we all listen when posters ask for our opinions but then try to control out response.

Girl, bye.

sophhabobopha · April 2015

huskypuppy14 · April 2015

drunkenwitch · April 2015

1) you did nothing to make that as short as possible

2) Someone didn't like your mashed potatoes

3) Sounds like all ya'all just love love looooovvvee your drama

4) I actually took the time to read that and I WANT MY LIFE BACK

5) I can't. I just can't.

6) Yes, you are crazy. Yes, you are way over reacting.

7) What the actual fuck does being white or being Mexican have anything to do with acting like drama queen on meth?

drunkenwitch · April 2015

But you guuuuuyyyssss, stop being so mean. Like I totally understand why the OP is upset. Because like the other night and stuff I made mac and cheese out of brown rice noodles and tofu. And like some bitch that is dating bf's bff's sil's mil's dn's bil asked why my mac and cheese didn't have cheese. So naturally I totally threw a drink in her face, set the kitchen on fire, called her a cock juggling thunder cunt and then kicked her dog on the way out. The next day she totally posted on Facebook about a restraining order and something so I posted back that she should get AIDS and die. Am I crazy? Did I over react? I totally think it's because she's from the Moon and I'm a blow up doll.

ohannabelle · April 2015

I have to know- is anybody else making macaroni and cheese tonight?

Because this thread shot my diet all to hell.

lyndausvi · April 2015

ohannabelle said:
I have to know- is anybody else making macaroni and cheese tonight?
Because this thread shot my diet all to hell.

we had Velveeta for dinner. That was BEFORE I read this thread.

On another note, I have a feeling the OP has NEVER been welcoming towards the GF, even maybe down right rude to her. Add in a little tequila and I things came to blow.

Oh and my live in BF better the fuck support me over his BF's rude and condescending GF.

Non-wedding, LONG post, southern birthday post-party woes... Am I crazy?

Re: Non-wedding, LONG post, southern birthday post-party woes... Am I crazy?

Choose Another Board

Search Boards