Chit Chat

FB Rant

2

Re: FB Rant

  • I post pictures of the Arches, mountains or other scenery.  I post pics of the dogs or family together.  I post random pics of events.  I do not tag people though.   Well sometimes I will tag DH, but it's with his permission.  I never just tag people.

    I post pitchforks or cheers comments about the Philadelphia Eagles. I never post about work.  I do not post about DH.   I rarely even like one of his posts.  I may share a post, but rarely comment or like the post.  Comments are mostly commenting on a comment another user posts.  Not anything directed to DH specifically.

    I'm FB friends with some knotties who have kids. I can contest they do not over-share.  Maybe an easter picture with the family.  That is about it.  It's so refreshing compared to some other parents I know.






    What differentiates an average host and a great host is anticipating unexpressed needs and wants of their guests.  Just because the want/need is not expressed, doesn't mean it wouldn't be appreciated. 
  • I post a ton of pictures of my kids (not like, daily). I don't see how this is anywhere near posting about your child's failed relationship. And I do not get the mega-judgement about it at all.
  • FB is never the place for personal information. I think people know I am divorced but I never post on FB about it or anything like that. I also have pics of me my new bf, but again, I haven't directly mentioned it.

    I think anything personal needs to be kept off FB, but it's so surprising how many people do it. There are so many people on my friend's list whose entire life stories I know. It's really crazy!

    Well, if you had pictures of your husband, and now you have pictures of your boyfriend, I'm pretty sure people have figured out something is up. 

    Anything personal needs to be kept off FB? But your name is on there, along with pictures of your boyfriend. THAT is personal. 
    I assuming by 'personal' @owningahome1981 meant along the lines of status' on your miscarriage, counseling sessions, martial status, kids relationship status, etc.   I can totally understand being super happy and going 'F*ck yeah!' when the divorce finally came through, but also understand if it's something you wish to withhold drawing attention to by quietly removing your relationship status or changing your name. 

    Posting pictures of your new BF or of that great summer vacation, to me, is a lot less personal and invasive then opening the flood gates by publicly annoucing that your 'relationship status has changed' or that you had a miscarriage, etc.
  • We had been engaged about an hour when I saw FI about to make a Facebook post..I said no, don't do that yet, I want to tell people myself. He said other people had already posted it!! (He had close friends and family there when he did it). I was so pissed. The person who posted it isn't even one of our closer friends, but his sister is and for some reason she brought him. I was livid so I then had to mad rush to text people.
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • hicoco said:

    We had been engaged about an hour when I saw FI about to make a Facebook post..I said no, don't do that yet, I want to tell people myself. He said other people had already posted it!! (He had close friends and family there when he did it). I was so pissed. The person who posted it isn't even one of our closer friends, but his sister is and for some reason she brought him. I was livid so I then had to mad rush to text people.

    That's fucking rude. I remember a lady I was in grad school with had an adult son who got engaged, and she found out via facebook! Her son's new FI posted something about it before her son even had the chance to tell her. She was telling me this with tears in her eyes and I felt awful for her. 
    image
  • hicoco said:

    We had been engaged about an hour when I saw FI about to make a Facebook post..I said no, don't do that yet, I want to tell people myself. He said other people had already posted it!! (He had close friends and family there when he did it). I was so pissed. The person who posted it isn't even one of our closer friends, but his sister is and for some reason she brought him. I was livid so I then had to mad rush to text people.

    That's fucking rude. I remember a lady I was in grad school with had an adult son who got engaged, and she found out via facebook! Her son's new FI posted something about it before her son even had the chance to tell her. She was telling me this with tears in her eyes and I felt awful for her. 
    Seriously. It really suck that people feel like they have to share your news. Like wtf? It's just that ME ME ME mentality. It's not about you. It's actually about me. 
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
    image
  • I post a ton of pictures of my kids (not like, daily). I don't see how this is anywhere near posting about your child's failed relationship. And I do not get the mega-judgement about it at all.

    I don't actually mind cute pics of kids on my feed, as long as it's not excessive, and even then I just hide the person. 

    I just think I might personally keep it to a reasonable number, and avoid the kinds of stuff that might come back to haunt/embarrass them later (bathtub pics, any pics with bodily fluids everywhere, etc.). It's just a little strange to think about what might happen when the kid grows up--obviously parents have taken photos of their kids "without consent" (I mean, lol) since the dawn of time, but those pics haven't always been posted online where anyone could theoretically access them. If I had the kind of kid who grew up and really wanted privacy, I guess I could see how they might be annoyed if their internet presence was already decided for them before they got a chance to shape it.

    Not that I think my kids will be SO SUPER IMPORTANT that people all over the world will be stalking their birthday party pictures. I just think it's something to think about, and I'm not sure what the "right" answer is (or whether there is one).
    image
    This baby knows exactly how I feel
  • littlepep said:

    People post way too much shit on FB. It's not a fucking journal. Don't share personal stuff, especially if it's not yours to share. 

    Yesss.. Honestly, sometimes I think people don't realize how far this information travels. Or they don't really "get" social media and that status updates are for everyone to see. Or they don't get privacy settings. Or they don't realize that once something is out there, it's OUT THERE. Like forever.

    I know some people don't give a shit, but some people I honestly think do not understand.
    *********************************************************************************

    image
  • RE: the kids thing, I don't think it's a big deal if you post a few pictures of them at play time, or on vacation, or at a birthday party, but keep bodily functions off of FB, and please don't post pictures of them naked. 


    image
  • I'm sure what Owning means by personal is otherwise known as TMI.

    Good post: "Going into labor!"
    Bad post: "Dilated 4cm so far, boy, labor can't go fast enough."
    Good post: "Happy to have my bathroom remodel done, looks great! << picture >>"
    Bad post: "So this happened and this happened and this happened and that happened and OMG remodeling SUCKS."
    Good posting: 1 per day
    Annoying posting: 8 posts per day, all of the same thing (your selfie, your baby)
    Good posting: Things that happen to you personally
    Bad posting: Things that happened to other people that are totally not your place to share. Middle-aged adults posting news about their adult children are especially annoying; for example, I learned the sex of my best friend's baby from her mom on FB before she could tell her friends herself. Not nice. 



    H has an aunt who has wanted to be a grandma since always. She continually talks about (and has posted to Facebook) about being jealous of MIL for her 5 grandkids, while her two children have been married for 3-5 years and she has no grandchildren.

    I was surprised she had the courtesy to wait until her daughter made a Facebook announcement of their pregnancy (we had already heard it from the aunt IRL, not the cousin, of course) to post something about how she was getting to be a grandma finally. It was less than 10 minutes' difference.

    It's difficult when people don't realize that this news really isn't at all about you and therefore isn't yours to discuss publicly. It's so much worse if the person being violated is a teen.

  • flbride2015flbride2015 member
    5 Love Its First Comment Name Dropper First Anniversary
    edited April 2015
    hicoco said:

    We had been engaged about an hour when I saw FI about to make a Facebook post..I said no, don't do that yet, I want to tell people myself. He said other people had already posted it!! (He had close friends and family there when he did it). I was so pissed. The person who posted it isn't even one of our closer friends, but his sister is and for some reason she brought him. I was livid so I then had to mad rush to text people.




    When my ex and I finally decided to get divorced, he immediately went on FB and changed his marital status from "married" to "in a relationship with (insert name of girl he'd already been seeing)". But he hid it from me, so I had no clue. Next thing you know my phone is blowing up with texts and calls from friends and family, i hadn't had a chance to tell them yet. Yup, that shit happened. Oh, and now I have all that info hidden from myprofile, no relationhip info, work info, eduation, nada.

    I also found out a friend was engaged on FB. His fiance posted it. I asked him if it was real or a joke and he said it was true, but he hadn't planned on telling anyone yet. Oh well.

  • I post a ton of pictures of my kids (not like, daily). I don't see how this is anywhere near posting about your child's failed relationship. And I do not get the mega-judgement about it at all.

    I don't actually mind cute pics of kids on my feed, as long as it's not excessive, and even then I just hide the person. 

    I just think I might personally keep it to a reasonable number, and avoid the kinds of stuff that might come back to haunt/embarrass them later (bathtub pics, any pics with bodily fluids everywhere, etc.). It's just a little strange to think about what might happen when the kid grows up--obviously parents have taken photos of their kids "without consent" (I mean, lol) since the dawn of time, but those pics haven't always been posted online where anyone could theoretically access them. If I had the kind of kid who grew up and really wanted privacy, I guess I could see how they might be annoyed if their internet presence was already decided for them before they got a chance to shape it.

    Not that I think my kids will be SO SUPER IMPORTANT that people all over the world will be stalking their birthday party pictures. I just think it's something to think about, and I'm not sure what the "right" answer is (or whether there is one).
    Yeah, I'm one of those weirdos who LOVES seeing pictures of other people's kids... but like, one at a time, and just the cute ones. I hate when people post EVERY PICTURE from an event, whether it's 100 pictures of your kid where 95 of them are blinking like they're in mid-sneeze, or every blurry indiscernible picture of the foggy stage at a concert.
    OMG or like 6 pictures a day. "Little Tommy woke up!" "Aww little Tommy eating cheerios!!"

    Stop. Stop that. I don't need to see a picture of your kid every 5 minutes. Show me a couple of cute pictures a week and I'm good. I want to see that. 
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
    image
  • levioosa said:

    RE: the kids thing, I don't think it's a big deal if you post a few pictures of them at play time, or on vacation, or at a birthday party, but keep bodily functions off of FB, and please don't post pictures of them naked. 

    No lie, one girl on my feed posted a pic of her kid covered in poop. I immediately blocked her. That is not funny or cute. That's gross. Also, why are you wasting time taking a picture while your kid is literally covered in shit?
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
    image
  • littlepep said:

    RE: the kids thing, I don't think it's a big deal if you post a few pictures of them at play time, or on vacation, or at a birthday party, but keep bodily functions off of FB, and please don't post pictures of them naked. 
    No lie, one girl on my feed posted a pic of her kid covered in poop. I immediately blocked her. That is not funny or cute. That's gross. Also, why are you wasting time taking a picture while your kid is literally covered in shit?

    THIS!

    Like, are you really so narcissistic and gross that you think taking a photo is more important than cleaning the poor kid UP?
    image
    This baby knows exactly how I feel
  • Yeah, I was really upset about it and it took away from me being able to tell my other friends or family in person. It just sucked. And of course he didn't think there was a problem with it, ask if he should take it down, etc.
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • hicoco said:

    We had been engaged about an hour when I saw FI about to make a Facebook post..I said no, don't do that yet, I want to tell people myself. He said other people had already posted it!! (He had close friends and family there when he did it). I was so pissed. The person who posted it isn't even one of our closer friends, but his sister is and for some reason she brought him. I was livid so I then had to mad rush to text people.

    That's fucking rude. I remember a lady I was in grad school with had an adult son who got engaged, and she found out via facebook! Her son's new FI posted something about it before her son even had the chance to tell her. She was telling me this with tears in her eyes and I felt awful for her. 
    I was engaged once before FI (so young...so stupid) and I was so excited and I told him I wanted to go tell my mom right then. When we got there, she was super pissed and I didn't know why. Turns out shitbag has posted it on FB the second after it happened. I didn't even get a chance to tell my parents!! Can you say livid??!!
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • hicoco said:

    We had been engaged about an hour when I saw FI about to make a Facebook post..I said no, don't do that yet, I want to tell people myself. He said other people had already posted it!! (He had close friends and family there when he did it). I was so pissed. The person who posted it isn't even one of our closer friends, but his sister is and for some reason she brought him. I was livid so I then had to mad rush to text people.

    That's fucking rude. I remember a lady I was in grad school with had an adult son who got engaged, and she found out via facebook! Her son's new FI posted something about it before her son even had the chance to tell her. She was telling me this with tears in her eyes and I felt awful for her. 
    I was engaged once before FI (so young...so stupid) and I was so excited and I told him I wanted to go tell my mom right then. When we got there, she was super pissed and I didn't know why. Turns out shitbag has posted it on FB the second after it happened. I didn't even get a chance to tell my parents!! Can you say livid??!!
    Fi and I never posted about our engagement. I don't even think our relationship statuses have changed from single, hahaha.

    I was on the phone with my mom right after it happened when FI showed me his phone - his mom had taken the shitty cell-phone pic he's sent her of the ring on my hand and put it on Facebook. And a few of my friends had liked it.

    I hung up with my mom pretty quickly and started calling the must-tells. It kind of pissed me off that people I hadn't intended to tell while I was on vacation, I had to call.
    Daisypath Wedding tickers
    image
  • I am SO GLAD that FB wasn't really a thing when DH popped the question.
  • hicoco said:

    We had been engaged about an hour when I saw FI about to make a Facebook post..I said no, don't do that yet, I want to tell people myself. He said other people had already posted it!! (He had close friends and family there when he did it). I was so pissed. The person who posted it isn't even one of our closer friends, but his sister is and for some reason she brought him. I was livid so I then had to mad rush to text people.

    That's fucking rude. I remember a lady I was in grad school with had an adult son who got engaged, and she found out via facebook! Her son's new FI posted something about it before her son even had the chance to tell her. She was telling me this with tears in her eyes and I felt awful for her. 
    I was engaged once before FI (so young...so stupid) and I was so excited and I told him I wanted to go tell my mom right then. When we got there, she was super pissed and I didn't know why. Turns out shitbag has posted it on FB the second after it happened. I didn't even get a chance to tell my parents!! Can you say livid??!!
    Fi and I never posted about our engagement. I don't even think our relationship statuses have changed from single, hahaha.

    I was on the phone with my mom right after it happened when FI showed me his phone - his mom had taken the shitty cell-phone pic he's sent her of the ring on my hand and put it on Facebook. And a few of my friends had liked it.

    I hung up with my mom pretty quickly and started calling the must-tells. It kind of pissed me off that people I hadn't intended to tell while I was on vacation, I had to call.
    Yeah a bunch of our friends and family liked the status before I could call people. By the time I got to my grandparents it was public knowledge. It was not a great way to start things. He saw no problem with it at all and said my mom and I were overreacting. 

    Current FI learned from that. A) Our family was there so there was no "telling" them. B) we sat and called our extended family together to tell them the news C) THEN we excitedly told the world of FB and shared photos.

    For the record, sharing your lives on FB doesn't bother me. Sharing extremely personal (TMI personal) things does. But for the most part I enjoy seeing my friends/family's pictures of their kids and whatnot. I do not think that FB is the place to air out all your dirty laundry though. 
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • hicoco said:

    We had been engaged about an hour when I saw FI about to make a Facebook post..I said no, don't do that yet, I want to tell people myself. He said other people had already posted it!! (He had close friends and family there when he did it). I was so pissed. The person who posted it isn't even one of our closer friends, but his sister is and for some reason she brought him. I was livid so I then had to mad rush to text people.

    That's fucking rude. I remember a lady I was in grad school with had an adult son who got engaged, and she found out via facebook! Her son's new FI posted something about it before her son even had the chance to tell her. She was telling me this with tears in her eyes and I felt awful for her. 
    I was engaged once before FI (so young...so stupid) and I was so excited and I told him I wanted to go tell my mom right then. When we got there, she was super pissed and I didn't know why. Turns out shitbag has posted it on FB the second after it happened. I didn't even get a chance to tell my parents!! Can you say livid??!!
    Fi and I never posted about our engagement. I don't even think our relationship statuses have changed from single, hahaha.

    I was on the phone with my mom right after it happened when FI showed me his phone - his mom had taken the shitty cell-phone pic he's sent her of the ring on my hand and put it on Facebook. And a few of my friends had liked it.

    I hung up with my mom pretty quickly and started calling the must-tells. It kind of pissed me off that people I hadn't intended to tell while I was on vacation, I had to call.
    Unfortunately I just told people, were still calling people so don't post anything to just be safe. Annoying we had to do it but whatever.
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
    image
  • littlepep said:

    hicoco said:

    We had been engaged about an hour when I saw FI about to make a Facebook post..I said no, don't do that yet, I want to tell people myself. He said other people had already posted it!! (He had close friends and family there when he did it). I was so pissed. The person who posted it isn't even one of our closer friends, but his sister is and for some reason she brought him. I was livid so I then had to mad rush to text people.

    That's fucking rude. I remember a lady I was in grad school with had an adult son who got engaged, and she found out via facebook! Her son's new FI posted something about it before her son even had the chance to tell her. She was telling me this with tears in her eyes and I felt awful for her. 
    I was engaged once before FI (so young...so stupid) and I was so excited and I told him I wanted to go tell my mom right then. When we got there, she was super pissed and I didn't know why. Turns out shitbag has posted it on FB the second after it happened. I didn't even get a chance to tell my parents!! Can you say livid??!!
    Fi and I never posted about our engagement. I don't even think our relationship statuses have changed from single, hahaha.

    I was on the phone with my mom right after it happened when FI showed me his phone - his mom had taken the shitty cell-phone pic he's sent her of the ring on my hand and put it on Facebook. And a few of my friends had liked it.

    I hung up with my mom pretty quickly and started calling the must-tells. It kind of pissed me off that people I hadn't intended to tell while I was on vacation, I had to call.
    Unfortunately I just told people, were still calling people so don't post anything to just be safe. Annoying we had to do it but whatever.
    I said the same thing. My mom is the worst offender. She was good though and didn't put anything until I did. My husband isn't on facebook.

    My uncle put that my great grandmother died on facebook. Luckily, my mom called me before I saw the post, but it was posted before I knew.
    image
    image

    image


  • When we got engaged, we were on a ski trip and told no one for the 3 days we were away. We made calls from the road on our way home, and I specifically said immediately to my mom NO facebook. She laughed and said she was literally grabbing her cell phone to do so. MIL/FIL don't use social media so they were safe. I made sure everyone we called or texted were told to not post anything until we did. Surprisingly everyone was great and we posted it about a week after the engagement.

    A few times I have seen engagements / baby announcements / death announcements on FB and it upsets me when family don't take the time to tell me first. I'm always careful to not spoil someone else's secrets too. I did have a word with my mom about posting about a family member passing away before she even called me. She's been much better with things like that lately.
    image Daisypath Anniversary tickers
  • When we got engaged, we were on a ski trip and told no one for the 3 days we were away. We made calls from the road on our way home, and I specifically said immediately to my mom NO facebook. She laughed and said she was literally grabbing her cell phone to do so. MIL/FIL don't use social media so they were safe. I made sure everyone we called or texted were told to not post anything until we did. Surprisingly everyone was great and we posted it about a week after the engagement.

    A few times I have seen engagements / baby announcements / death announcements on FB and it upsets me when family don't take the time to tell me first. I'm always careful to not spoil someone else's secrets too. I did have a word with my mom about posting about a family member passing away before she even called me. She's been much better with things like that lately.

    What?! She took the time to post about it on social media BEFORE she bothered to call you?! Jesus. That really sucks.
    image
  • I have family and friends who post way too many photos on Facebook every damn day. I get it you're happy and want to show them off to the world. But I don't need to constantly see your kid.

    One cousin who has been doing this, Facebook was the way we found she was even pregnant and it was pretty much the day she gave birth. It kinda irked some family members because that isn't the best way for us to find out you're having a kid.

    I used to be one of those people who posted everything on Facebook. But then it bit me in the ass when BF'S brown nosing SIL went and showed his family something I said on a post that got twisted around. Now I just post articles that I think BF would like or pictures of my cat.

    I recently had an old classmate of mine from high school get into a drag down fight with her fiancé that revealed way too much personal problems between the two of them. Some people are just looking for the attention.
    Formerly known as bubbles053009





This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards