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Stepmother hosting

RlovesRRlovesR member
100 Love Its 10 Comments Name Dropper First Answer
in Wedding Invitations & Paper
We are paying for 50% of our wedding expenses, with 25% coming from my parents and 25% coming from FI's father and stepmother.  The money from FI's family definitely came from both FFIL and FSMIL both; it was a check from their joint account.  His mother has not contributed financially.

With that in mind, we're confused about how to word the invitations.  Should it be:

My parents
&
FFIL and FSMIL
&
FMIL 

invite you to celebrate

or do only the people who are hosting go on the invite?  Can we use the "celebrate the marriage of their children" if one is a stepparent or shoudl we just use "invite you to celebrate the marriage of myname and hisname"?

If it matters, FSMIL did raise my husband; he lived with her and FFIL from the age of 6 until he left home.  They're pretty close.  He does have a relationship with his mother, although it's somewhat strained.  FMIL had a lot of problems with me when we first got engaged because of her racist views, but she's working through that with therapy and I'd rather not alienate her so long as she's being polite and trying to change...

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Re: Stepmother hosting

  • CMGragainCMGragain member
    10000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 25 Answers
    edited January 2016
    Mr. and Mrs. John Bridesfather
    Mr. and Mrs. George Groomsfather
    request the pleasure of your company
    at the marriage of
    Bride's Full Name
    and
    Groom's Full Name
    Saturday, the thirteenth of August
    two thousand sixteen
    at six o'clock
    Venue Name
    123 Main Street
    City, State

    Reception to follow



    "Invite you to celebrate the marriage" sounds like you are already married, and that this is an invitation to a vow renewal, or just a party.  Way too vague.  Your invitation needs to clearly state that this is a wedding.  In general "children" do not get married, so this is why it is generally worded this way.  If you are having a church wedding, you would use "request the honour of your presence".
    The only names that should appear on the invitation are the hosts and the wedding couple.  The invitation is not a family tree.
    httpiimgurcomTCCjW0wjpg
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  • RlovesRRlovesR member
    100 Love Its 10 Comments Name Dropper First Answer
    Oh, that's perfect! Leave the family relations off all together and just list the hosts!  Love it - thanks!
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  • Jen4948Jen4948 member
    Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 25 Answers
    edited January 2016
    BTW, "paying" does not equal "hosting." Hosting in the context of wedding invitations means acting as a point person for the recipient-issuing the invitations, receiving the replies, greeting the guests, and making the arrangements that ensure that their needs during the wedding are met. It's possible to contribute financially without doing any of these things, but someone who does that should not be listed as a "host" on the invitation.

    Also, while it's an honor to receive a wedding invitation, it's not an honor to be listed on one, and the wording is not supposed to reflect who is paying for what. The finances are none of the guests' business.
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