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Etiquette

How to address invitations for "ladies only" bridal shower?

I'm going to be having a ladies only bridal shower, but all women/girls in the household are invited - Moms and daughters, regardless of age. How do I address the invitation to reflect this? Do I just write it to the moms and have it assumed the girls are invited too...do I write something like "Mrs. Jane Smith & Daughters"? or do I just reference it being "ladies only" in the invite? I just want to make it clear that younger girls are invited, and don't want them to assume that ladies only means adults only.
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Re: How to address invitations for "ladies only" bridal shower?

  • levioosalevioosa Southern California member
    5000 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    Address everyone by name. 


    image
    LadyCatherineDB
  • Jen4948Jen4948 Houston member
    10000 Comments Seventh Anniversary 500 Love Its 25 Answers
    Use everyone's name. Don't say "women only" or anything like that.
    InLoveInQueens
  • I would also spread by word of mouth that daughters are invited as possible. Personally, I rarely see showers with kids invited at all, so I'd probably not encode the envelope so we'll.  Guests may appreciate a reminder. 
    charlotte989875ahoyweddingInLoveInQueensPrettyGirlLost
  • holyguacamole79holyguacamole79 a taco truck in Houston member
    5000 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    Just wanted to add that my experience with showers is that men rarely assume they are invited unless it is specifically a couples' shower.  Most guys aren't into them ;)
    STARMOON44lovesclimbingsparklepants41ahoywedding
  • ei34ei34 member
    Seventh Anniversary 2500 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    Listing each guest by name on the invitation is your best bet.  Showers in my family are girls and women only, but in H's family, males are also invited. A few of the ladies asked if their husbands were invited anyway (I guess how a couple who receives a wedding invite to just them still asks if their kids are invited) and my mom (who hosted) clarified.
  • MobKazMobKaz Chicago suburbs member
    Ninth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers


    I'm going to be having a ladies only bridal shower, but all women/girls in the household are invited - Moms and daughters, regardless of age. How do I address the invitation to reflect this? Do I just write it to the moms and have it assumed the girls are invited too...do I write something like "Mrs. Jane Smith & Daughters"? or do I just reference it being "ladies only" in the invite? I just want to make it clear that younger girls are invited, and don't want them to assume that ladies only means adults only.


    I agree that names should be specified on the invitations.  You don't want to run into a scenario where daughters is translated by some as "children".  You could end up with guests bringing their male babies or toddlers thinking all children are welcome.
    MyNameIsNot
  • DrillSergeantCatDrillSergeantCat Oklahoma City, OK member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary First Answer

    lnixon8 said:



    MobKaz said:








    I'm going to be having a ladies only bridal shower, but all women/girls in the household are invited - Moms and daughters, regardless of age. How do I address the invitation to reflect this? Do I just write it to the moms and have it assumed the girls are invited too...do I write something like "Mrs. Jane Smith & Daughters"? or do I just reference it being "ladies only" in the invite? I just want to make it clear that younger girls are invited, and don't want them to assume that ladies only means adults only.






    I agree that names should be specified on the invitations.  You don't want to run into a scenario where daughters is translated by some as "children".  You could end up with guests bringing their male babies or toddlers thinking all children are welcome.




    Would this be a problem? I get not inviting bored husbands/uncles but a baby or toddler is going to be just as uninterested and do the same behaviors whether the baby is a boy or girl.


    Only okay if he's wearing pink.
    justsieholyguacamole79lnixon8

  • lnixon8 said:



    MobKaz said:








    I'm going to be having a ladies only bridal shower, but all women/girls in the household are invited - Moms and daughters, regardless of age. How do I address the invitation to reflect this? Do I just write it to the moms and have it assumed the girls are invited too...do I write something like "Mrs. Jane Smith & Daughters"? or do I just reference it being "ladies only" in the invite? I just want to make it clear that younger girls are invited, and don't want them to assume that ladies only means adults only.






    I agree that names should be specified on the invitations.  You don't want to run into a scenario where daughters is translated by some as "children".  You could end up with guests bringing their male babies or toddlers thinking all children are welcome.




    Would this be a problem? I get not inviting bored husbands/uncles but a baby or toddler is going to be just as uninterested and do the same behaviors whether the baby is a boy or girl.


    I'm assuming some mamas will bring their sons...if they're under 2 or 3 I wouldn't care, and that's pretty much only what anyone would expect. I think the women I'm inviting are smart enough to know that their older sons would be incredibly bored in a room full of pink, household presents, and females. ;-)
  • MobKazMobKaz Chicago suburbs member
    Ninth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers

    lnixon8 said:



    MobKaz said:








    I'm going to be having a ladies only bridal shower, but all women/girls in the household are invited - Moms and daughters, regardless of age. How do I address the invitation to reflect this? Do I just write it to the moms and have it assumed the girls are invited too...do I write something like "Mrs. Jane Smith & Daughters"? or do I just reference it being "ladies only" in the invite? I just want to make it clear that younger girls are invited, and don't want them to assume that ladies only means adults only.






    I agree that names should be specified on the invitations.  You don't want to run into a scenario where daughters is translated by some as "children".  You could end up with guests bringing their male babies or toddlers thinking all children are welcome.




    Would this be a problem? I get not inviting bored husbands/uncles but a baby or toddler is going to be just as uninterested and do the same behaviors whether the baby is a boy or girl.


    For me, it would not.  However, if it expands the guest list of children to a number that exceeds the hosts expectation, then, yes. 


    ei34SP29PrettyGirlLost
  • ei34ei34 member
    Seventh Anniversary 2500 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers

    MobKaz said:



    lnixon8 said:





    MobKaz said:











    I'm going to be having a ladies only bridal shower, but all women/girls in the household are invited - Moms and daughters, regardless of age. How do I address the invitation to reflect this? Do I just write it to the moms and have it assumed the girls are invited too...do I write something like "Mrs. Jane Smith & Daughters"? or do I just reference it being "ladies only" in the invite? I just want to make it clear that younger girls are invited, and don't want them to assume that ladies only means adults only.








    I agree that names should be specified on the invitations.  You don't want to run into a scenario where daughters is translated by some as "children".  You could end up with guests bringing their male babies or toddlers thinking all children are welcome.






    Would this be a problem? I get not inviting bored husbands/uncles but a baby or toddler is going to be just as uninterested and do the same behaviors whether the baby is a boy or girl.




    For me, it would not.  However, if it expands the guest list of children to a number that exceeds the hosts expectation, then, yes. 




    Yeah, my bridal and baby showers were just females.  H's sisters and cousins have 12 sons among them, and 2 daughters.  (The Y chromosome must be very strong in his family because he's one of 14 male cousins vs. 3 females, and his father has 8 siblings, only two of them female.)  Fourteen kids at a shower wasn't the vibe my mom was going for, so she drew the line at girls but not boys.  Girls and their mothers were listed on the invitation.  
    DrillSergeantCatPrettyGirlLostMobKaz
  • MyNameIsNotMyNameIsNot Atlanta member
    Ninth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer




    lnixon8 said:





    MobKaz said:











    I'm going to be having a ladies only bridal shower, but all women/girls in the household are invited - Moms and daughters, regardless of age. How do I address the invitation to reflect this? Do I just write it to the moms and have it assumed the girls are invited too...do I write something like "Mrs. Jane Smith & Daughters"? or do I just reference it being "ladies only" in the invite? I just want to make it clear that younger girls are invited, and don't want them to assume that ladies only means adults only.








    I agree that names should be specified on the invitations.  You don't want to run into a scenario where daughters is translated by some as "children".  You could end up with guests bringing their male babies or toddlers thinking all children are welcome.






    Would this be a problem? I get not inviting bored husbands/uncles but a baby or toddler is going to be just as uninterested and do the same behaviors whether the baby is a boy or girl.




    I'm assuming some mamas will bring their sons...if they're under 2 or 3 I wouldn't care, and that's pretty much only what anyone would expect. I think the women I'm inviting are smart enough to know that their older sons would be incredibly bored in a room full of pink, household presents, and females. ;-)


    You don't assume that people will bring uninvited guests, and you certainly don't leave it to guests to assume who you are inviting. If you want to open the invitation to male children, put their names on the invitation too. 

    Why are you sending your own shower invitations? 
  • Anyone who reads "daughters" and thinks "all children welcome" is an idiot but the solution is simple, just list all the names. 
    holyguacamole79ei34cupcait927PrettyGirlLost

  • levioosa said:

    A few months ago I attended an awesome baby shower. For the first time in my life I was not eagerly anticipating the end. The presents took the back burner (they made an announcement and opened them, but you didn't feel like a captive audience), there was an open bar, great food, no games, and mingling at a beautiful hotel with an ocean view. If only every shower was like that. I would attend the hell out of those. 


    My family has adopted the non-shower pre-wedding luncheon or brunch. Open bar, yummy food, and not gift centric. Most people usually bring them I guess (I usually do) but they're not opened. It's usually labelled a "Pre-Wedding Ladies Luncheon" or similar. Everytime I have to go to a shower with gifts opened I cringe.  
  • Too bad it's against etiquette to give the guests a heads-up about the type of shower to expect. I'd be all about going to one with no games and plenty of good food and drink.
    PrettyGirlLostflantasticInLoveInQueensahoywedding
  • I went to a couples wedding shower.  Talk about serious gender segregation, lol.  All the ladies were in the living room, oohing and aahing while the bride opened the presents.  All the guys were outside drinking beers, BBQing up lunch, and socializing.  Once the presents were done, only then did everyone grab grub and mingle together.

    No negative reflection on the wedding couple!  It was a fun and well hosted shower.  But I couldn't help but inwardly laugh at how the stereotypical gender roles just naturally played out with people.

    As an aside, I hung out with the guys.  Not for bucking gender role reasons, but I was new in town and didn't really know anybody.  Plus, one of the BM's was my b/f's most recent ex.  So I was not going to be sitting in a room where the only person I knew was the bride and some of the other ladies would be throwing daggers at me, lol!  

    Wedding Countdown Ticker
    SP29
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