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Wedding Woes
Laser Hair Removal
in Wedding Woes
Have y'all done this? If yes, did it work? Was yours painful? What areas did you get done? How many treatments did it take? How much did you pay?
I got a few treatments about 7 or 8 years ago and it was SUPER painful and didn't really work long term. Objectively, it was cheaper than I would have expected and the office no longer exists, so super shady. My dermatologist's office does it and it's really reputable. They recommended waiting until I'm done having kids. Now I'm just trying to figure out if it's worth it....
I got a few treatments about 7 or 8 years ago and it was SUPER painful and didn't really work long term. Objectively, it was cheaper than I would have expected and the office no longer exists, so super shady. My dermatologist's office does it and it's really reputable. They recommended waiting until I'm done having kids. Now I'm just trying to figure out if it's worth it....
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Re: Laser Hair Removal
I got my chin/neck area done and then towards the end, tried the knuckles.
No, it didn't work!
edit for words
I no longer bother removing my body hair. I have light skin and thick, dark hair that grows on my face, chest, and stomach, as well as on my legs. It is part of my body and I no longer worry about changing my body to conform to a male-defined expectation of female beauty.
I found it very interesting and infuriating to learn about the history of women's hair removal in North America. It was practically non-existent until shaving companies needed a new market during WW1.
1) I hear it's best if you have lighter skin and darker hair. It's hard to accomplish on blondes.
2) You need multiple treatments I think at least 4 weeks apart so they can catch the growth coming in.
I've had my lip and bikini area done. In both cases, I still see visible hair but
-On my lip, I find that it takes longer for the hair to come in and when it does it's less noticeable.
-I used to get far more frequent in grown hairs in my bikini line and now hardly ever get them.
I have heard it eventually will grow back and it's not permanent but those I know that continued with all treatments were thrilled.
If you're someone who wants to rock body hair then go for it. If I could continue with treatments I'd at least go for the two areas again.
It's like when women claim they're shaving their legs "because I like how smooth it feels!" but wouldn't even know what having smooth legs felt like if they hadn't removed it in the first place.
My best female friend doesn’t shave, her armpits or legs, and Yay! for her but I find it uncomfortable, itchy, and armpit hair smelly.
I've always wanted to do it for under my arms. But it just never seemed worth the price for the, albeit, nice bit of convenience it would give me. That is, if it worked.
I know it's super weird. But the hair on my legs doesn't grow anymore. It was always really light blonde and sparse to begin with, but then it just stopped altogether in my mid-20s. I think it is a side effect of my eternally low thyroid, that I've never quite been able to get under full control.
A friend of mine did her legs and maybe other areas too and did the full required 8 treatments or whatever and has not experienced any regrowth. For her it was worth the price she said.
I had laser removal 8 years ago. With all the hormone based chemo therapy I have been on, I should have saved my money. Currently, I have no hair on my body - except for those chin hairs that grew back!
I pluck my lip and eye brows. I shave my legs even though it's annoying. I wax myself the lower half of my face from about the middle of my cheek down. I get lots of soft fine hair on my lower face and under my chin. My makeup goes on much smoother without it. I also pluck the stray dark hairs that grow on my chin. I use the Sally beauty strips you can buy at any grocery store in the beauty aisle. I think they work pretty well.
And I personally prefer to keep things trim in the same way that I see my hair stylist every 6 weeks. No, I don't HAVE to cut my hair or style it but I prefer the way I look with styled hair, plucked eyebrows, no dark upper lip hair, shaved armpits and hair that doesn't peek out of my underwear. I'll be honest that I shave my legs a heck of a lot less when it's colder but once it's warmer, I think they look and feel better when they're clean-shaven.
If you don't want to do those things then that's great. I'll admit that in general I'm someone who conforms to a lot of societal norms. At this point, I don't think you can call it solely male-defined expectations. They may be of male origination but I think there's plenty of female expectations to change.
Does pain level depend on area?
I forgot in the above post - I have had a bikini wax twice and my legs below the knee once.
For bikini area, I get red bumps regardless of what I do to try to prevent. I've tried everything. So I actually like to pluck the edges. If I pluck a few hairs every day, it takes about a minute a day to keep up with it. That's how I do my brow and lip too. Pluck every day and it takes no time at all.
Women just find more creative ways to subtly call me that, I guess.
We are a culture where women can opt for a variety of hair, styles and clothing. Some friends lasered themselves clean and I personally can't imagine looking like a small child however I don't want it sticking out of my underwear. Others may opt for corsets, push up bras, thongs, or men's briefs.
It's about understanding IMO that as long as it's your choice and no one else's it doesn't matter.
This is a cultural phenomenon that affects all women and how we make our choices, whether we like it or not.
When one choice involves harassment and abuse and the other is presented as the only acceptable way to exist, how can that be presented as a choice? When young women are just handed a razor when they hit puberty and expected to remove their body hair, almost before they have any?
Women are not shown any way to grow up with their bodies in their natural state, and this cultural phenomenon requires critical analysis beyond "but I like it!" Of course most women are convinced they like it. We have never been given a real choice.
But at the same time not all women who choose to remove hair, wear make, perform femininity as you put it are internalizing misogyny. I agree with your call to be more reflexive about these practices, but if we do that, and still choose some, or all of these practices doesn’t mean we understand their roots. And yes, I believe and would advocate for women who are harassed and bullied for not conforming to gender or beauty norms, but I don’t have to do it in a way that feels inaunthentic to me.
Look - I get it. We're told to do things a certain way.
But FFS, there's a metric fuckton of pressure involved in raising a child. I can tell you that if my own daughter wants to avoid shaving when the time comes that's her choice but I can't control what others do. And while I'd love to yell and scream and police every child who rolls eyes in a middle school or high school setting the reality is that a lot of certain actions may also be advising you child to do something to protect them from the bullies.
And at this point, you're posting in a group of grown women who are aware that no one needs to tell them how to pluck eyebrows or shave their pits.
This is now needlessly criticizing those who opt to do something that may have roots in a male dominated choice but it's still something that I choose to do because *I* like it.
Get off the soapbox. If you don't want to remove pit hair, facial hair or any body hair I don't care. Stop condescending to the rest of us who make the choice to do it.
It's a really interesting anthropological discussion, IMHO - and your point about self-protection by conformation is also super interesting and valid.
I shave my legs, wax my bikini area, pluck my eyebrows- and not ONCE in my 38 years did I ever think I was "doing it for a man," or doing it because a once "male dominated society dictated I do it."
Wut?
I do it because I don't like the feel of hair on my body, and I prefer to be smooth. Me. End of story.
Navigating my own womanhood while raising a daughter is not easy.