**Updated** NWR: I think I may have been drugged.

SlothGoals

@pumpkinsandturkeys, I've been following the thread and I want to send my thoughts and prayers your way! I am in Ontario too, the GTA.

ETA: I've also got connections to construction companies in Vaughan/Bolton, just in case you need a cement mixer.

Cokezerofreak

Pumpkin after that attitude from the host I also suspect he was involved or has knowledge. File it with the police if only to scare the shit out of him. He allowed this at his home. He should be liable.

As for the mob, I'm in! Although I like the fucking up the ass with a cactus that Haley suggested. Firebabe sounds like she watches too much Dexter.

firebabe6519

@cokezerofreak What's Dexter? Is it on Netflix?

pumpkinsandturkeys

firebabe6519 said:

@cokezerofreak What's Dexter? Is it on Netflix?

** stuck in box **

@firebabe6519 Please tell me this is a joke. You've never heard of Dexter??

firebabe6519

I don't do TV. FI only recently got me Netflix on my phone.

Cokezerofreak

Yes lol. Go watch it. I'm starting season 4 now. If it's not a joke of course.

SmileDamnit

Cokezerofreak said:

Firebabe sounds like she watches too much Dexter.

What about Law Abiding Citizen? That guys does awesome (read: torturous & so, SO deserved) things to that rapist fucker (…pardon my french).

pumpkinsandturkeys

Firebabe, get on Dexter ASAP. Right up your alley, from the sounds of it  

 ETF spelling

MyNameIsNot

firebabe6519 said:

I think its soooooo much crueler to leave the bastard alive after. You can slowly dismember a live and coherent human one tiny sliver at a time until nothing but a head, neck, and mangled trunk of a body remain without causing death all the while keeping the person alive and able to feel every Godforsaken second of the hell inflicted. I'm pretty partial to this method. :-P

firebabe6519  Yodeling potato?

Pumpkins, I'm so sorry that this happened to you.  I too suspect that the host is involved or knows something.  I do hope that you ultimately decide to file a police report, but that's a difficult decision that you need to make yourself.  I hope you go with the anonymous route soon to report everything 'fresh".  

firebabe6519

Definitely! I must look this up...

Cookie Pusher

I'm kind of envisioning a "Braveheart" type scene, very old-school.

chibiyui

@firebabe6519 I love that you know you can slowly dismember someone and keep them alive, but have not heard of Dexter. and by love I mean I'm slightly scared of you

Pumpkin, holy shit, that host is king douche and I really think he's involved. I'm still totally down for the angry mob.

firebabe6519

I know we are now an angry mob... But this was too precious to pass up.

pumpkinsandturkeys

Well, even angry mob members love bunnies, right?

Senecaf

I've been thinking of you all day. Your most recent update is horrible. What a terrible "friend" he is being. More hugs and sorries. I'm down to kick some ass, just let me know!

pumpkinsandturkeys

I'm realizing now that, despite all of the support and empowerment both online and offline, I don't know if I'm going to be able to handle going in to work tomorrow. I know that's a perfectly valid thing to feel, but it also makes me feel like a victim and a flake -- as if I should be stronger than this and be able to go on with my life as usual and not let this control me. I'm not used to feeling out of control.

AshleyNicole1218

@pumpkin Lots of hugs coming your way, lovie. I hope you're able to find the support you (and FI) need. One day at a time...

firebabe6519

Don't feel bad! The simple fact that you managed to get up and get dressed this morning, much less go in to work, is incredible! You are doing great pumpkin!

You were a victim. WERE... Whether you remain one is up to you. But taking some time to recoop and gather yourself does not make you a victim. That is surviving and conquering! You have been so strong, and I admire how you have managed to keep moving forward!

You go girl! Keep your head up and don't let your mind over think things.

Lots of hugs! Praying for ya!

lc07

This is my first post on this thread so I want to add my sympathies that you are going through this, Pumpkin.

Remember that there is no prize for first place. For pushing through and being a hero. Take it one day at a time, one hour at a time, one minute at a time. You don't have to decide right now about work. And if you would feel better going, go, and know you can leave. If you feel better staying home, then stay home, and get out of the house if you need to. You don't need to have all of the answers right now. Just continue to take care of yourself.

Sending you lots of love.

smalfrie19

pumpkinsandturkeys said:

I'm realizing now that, despite all of the support and empowerment both online and offline, I don't know if I'm going to be able to handle going in to work tomorrow. I know that's a perfectly valid thing to feel, but it also makes me feel like a victim and a flake -- as if I should be stronger than this and be able to go on with my life as usual and not let this control me. I'm not used to feeling out of control.

Your feelings are 100% valid. Take the time to heal. 

MyNameIsNot

It's perfectly fine to take tomorrow off.  This is still very new and very fresh.  You need to take things slowly and do them at your own pace.  Take the rest of the week off if you need to, and don't begin to feel guilty or wimpy for doing it.  

pumpkinsandturkeys

Thanks, guys. I think I'll take tomorrow off, and just go day-by-day. I'm just not really sure what to do with my time... Read? Sleep? Cry? I guess just whatever feels right..?

SmileDamnit

pumpkinsandturkeys said:

Thanks, guys. I think I'll take tomorrow off, and just go day-by-day. I'm just not really sure what to do with my time... Read? Sleep? Cry? I guess just whatever feels right..?

Just be. I believe someone else mentioned that there is no timeline to which you must follow. Be gentle with yourself. I have a quote tattooed on my arm that I reference every single day: this too shall pass. If I know nothing else in this world, I know this to be true. ((Hugs to you))

lc07

I am not going through anything similar to what you are going through but I am battling some personal problems right now and each day feels hard in it's own way. Yoga has helped me a lot. There are days when I just want to crawl into a hole and doing nothing but I force myself to go to yoga because I know that I always feel better afterwards. Even if just going to that class is the only "accomplishment" I have for the day, I know it's benefiting me. Do you have anything like that in your life? I also give myself points for getting basic things accomplished like eating healthy meals, drinking enough water etc. Basically, taking care of myself. 

That's a big accomplishment when dealing with adversity.  

Kauris

My family has about 1800 acres of land in Texas, no body would find any "parts" anytime soon.

MaryGraceRich

Im sorry that this happened to you!
I say we torture this guy Game of Thrones style with a rat and a bucket. But that may make me sound crazier than I am.

pinkcow13

pumpkinsandturkeys said:

Thanks, guys. I think I'll take tomorrow off, and just go day-by-day. I'm just not really sure what to do with my time... Read? Sleep? Cry? I guess just whatever feels right..?

The more I read through this thread the more pissed off I became. I definitely think that asshole of a host and "friend" is involved, somehow. He is absolutely pathetic. A true friend would have made sure that you were okay, or sent you home with your other friend, DD. Especially as the fucking host. If I had a gathering at our home, and one of the guests was passed out drunk in my bedroom, I would be checking on them every few minutes, even if just to make sure they didn't barf all over my bed. I would either try and send them home with their DD if they had one, or I would let them sleep it off. But I sure as hell would not leave them incapacitated like that, what the hell?? Who DOES that?! 

I am glad that you are thinking of taking tomorrow off. You def should. Do whatever feels right. I find that crying can be very therapeutic, so cry your eyes out if you need to, let it all out. And just try to relax, if you like to read, do that. Or just let it be a lazy netflix day. Catch up on Mad Men, Dexter, or any other show/movie that you enjoy. Chat on TK.  Spoil yourself. Eat ice cream and cookies, or whatever goodies you like. Just take the time to heal, and relax. Sending you tons of hugs!

jdluvr06

Yeah hon you should definitely not go to work tomorrow. Stay home and pamper yourself. If you need to vent we're all here for you.

JCbride2015

It's totally valid to take time off of work.  Lots of us here can identify with what you're going through in some way or another, and everybody processes trauma differently.  You've been through a trauma, made perhaps more traumatic because you aren't sure exactly what happened.  It's completely normal to need time to just be alone, not go to work, and do whatever feels right.

After I went through a trauma last year, I found myself alternating between totally beasting school, and then skipping multiple classes in a single week.  I felt this incredible pressure (coming only from myself, really) to immediately pick myself back up and just soldier on.  In retrospect I really wish I had taken more time immediately after the trauma to level myself, care for myself, and get centered again.  I think taking more time out in the beginning would have helped me recover more quickly.

Everyone's experience is different and I did not go through an assault, but my point is just that whatever self-care YOU think you need, you should do it.  You're the one who knows what's best for yourself.

hellohkb

Pumpkin, I am so so so sorry to hear about this *major hug*. Your "friend" is a major asshole. I really hope everything works out in your favor.

Whether this bridal mob is Beauty and the Beast style or AHS style, I'm in. I've got my torch and pitchfork waiting. I'm on the East Coast, where things can go missing, so to speak. *shifty eyes*