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Introduction Post (just a little late!)

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Re: Introduction Post (just a little late!)

  • Oh great, high school finals must me over with. OP, I know three couples who got married at a really young age (under 25). Out of those three, only one couple is still married. The other two couples split up because they realized they had a lot of growing up to do and things to experience alone.

     Wedding Countdown Ticker




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  • No one, that I've seen at least, has said anything derogatory about you or your character. They have simply stated that your are not emotionally and mentally mature enough to marry yet. There is not one single reason that marrying now is more beneficial than waiting just a few more years even. It could definitely work, and I pray it does, but is waiting just a few years really that big of a deal if it could mean a better marriage?

    I didn't doubt you'd disagree with all of us, after all we're the old hangs and you're the youngin' who knows everything. Because teenagers feel they know everything. You can't even admit or acknowledge that you are young and that maybe all these women have a point. Would there really be any harm in at least thinking about all of this?.

    After 6 years and 2 boys, finally tying the knot on October 27th, 2013!

    doeydoKeptInStitchescarliealissa
  • BreMRBreMR member
    500 Love Its 500 Comments Second Anniversary Name Dropper
    I have been keeping tabs on this thread since it started, I was one who said way far back that I've been with my boyfriend since we were 16 and are still not married at 28. I would have also fought tooth and nail that me and my bf would have beat the odds at your age... but our rough patch that came when were 24 and following 8  month break up was nothing I would have predicted.We are finally discussing marriage after going through that rough period about 3 years ago. Which would have resulted in a divorce of that I am a certain. 

    However, you seem very confident that getting married now is the right answer for you, and obviously opinions on a message board will not change that. If you are always this passionate about fighting for your marriage perhaps you will be a couple to beat the odds... I wish you luck...and I mean that sincerely.  
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    wiggsaj
  • @BreMR -- 
    Thank you. That was the nicest thing someone has said to me on this board. 
  • Why the hell did you ask what makes a happy marriage if you didn't want to have a discussion about it? Seriously, I wrote a novel of a post on it, which I pretty much never do, and you just ignored it.

    Rude


    Cant get out of the box...

    Why does this happen?



    I did read it, and I loved it. You were one of the few who responded to my question, so I didn't continue asking it. But I appreciate it. I agree with what you said. I'm sorry if I didn't say that in any of my posts. I meant to!

  • wiggsaj said:
    If you were reading, you'd know that I'm not taking college classes to be a psychologist. I'm taking them to be a teacher. 
    I googled it to find an article for you all to read, if you don't believe me. 
    It's pretty funny how I could find at least 4 articles on something that doesn't exist in the first page of the google search. Hmm.

    Must be because I am uneducated.

    Please enjoy the following:






    NOT reliable sources. Not at all. Regardless of which field you're going into, I hope you will learn to use peer-reviewed journals to support your arguments. I love Psychology Today, but to really evaluate the argument, you have to look at the actual data and not the writer's interpretation of it. Just sayin'.

    wiggsaj said:

    Honestly, the only response I was expecting when I created this post was a "welcome" or something. Just because it's what you expect, does not mean that's what we're required to offer. People have been blunt, but they are offering you advice and considerations that they genuinely want you to have. It's for YOU, my dear, not for us. I have tried wedding websites before, and I have only ever run into brutal and horrible things being said by women who have every religious and civil right to be married as I do. I'm sorry if you disagree, but that's a fact.

    I am a hard working, kind, happy, loving young woman. I do my job as a human by showing up to work on time, by donating money and time to those who need it, and by being exactly the person I am supposed to be. I have unique personality trates, such as the fact that I don't like to read and I like potatoes every single way because I'm a carb fanatic. I'm sorry if you disagree with those things, but that's who I am and I don't care to change for any one of you. Again, not asking you to change for us. It makes no difference to us what you do. People have taken time and thought to tell you what they think because they want to HELP YOU. It's a tough-love situation. If you've ever had someone you care about make a decision you strongly felt they would regret, you understand the impulse to make them think twice. That being said, it's obvious that all of our efforts are falling on deaf ears. I'm a proponent of saying it once and letting it go, and that's what I will be doing after this post. As I said, I genuinely hope things work out for you, but I'm not optimistic that they will. Based on my own experience and that of many of my peers, I feel like making such a massive commitment before you've completed at least two decades of life is not likely to be successful. In any case, don't think you'd be changing your mind for ANY of us. Consider changing it for yourself. Not even changing your mind about this guy - just waiting until you graduate from college! Learn to rely on yourself and your own judgment BEFORE becoming part of a married couple is so crucial, and it saddens me that you will be missing out on this.  It's sad that you'd ask that of me.

    I don't deserve to have any one of you attack me with these personal offenses. Not any single one of you. That said, it's pretty clear to me that I'm not the only one who has a little bit of growing up to do.

    None of us know how to be a spouse yet. I don't think anyone ever truly knows how to be a spouse. Maybe some of you are married now, or have been married before. If that's the case, sure, you have more experience than I do. In fact, I think all of you have been alive at least two years longer than myself, so you at least have a little bit more life experience under your belt. Some of you may know much more than I do about marriage and I love to read about those experiences. If you know another couple who got married young (below 20 is probably closest to my situation) and they either made it or didn't, please share their stories. If you did marry young, please share your story. Even still, while I love to hear your story and your words of wisdom, I don't need you to tell me that the odds are against me. I don't need you to curse at me or make fun of me. I don't need anyone to consider themselves better than me, because I consider all people equal. That is not constructive. Literally none of you ladies know me. Not a single one. All you know is what I've told you on this post (or other posts, for the few that have made the efforts to seriously continue this nastiness on other posts). That's not enough to make any sort of decisions about me or the things I'm doing. 

    If there is anything I've learned in my insignificant lifetime it is that it's okay to disagree with someone. Just because someone is doing something you don't like, that doesn't mean that you have to beat them down. It's okay to live the life you live without forcing others to agree with you. 
    So at this point I'm going to take my own advice and enjoy the life I lead to the fullest extent without having everyone agree with the things I'm doing. I think I should have stuck with my first approach by ignoring the snide remarks and not trying to defend my decisions. When some of you said that you were offended by that, I tried to go back and answer questions, being as naive as I am. I should have foreseen the mistreatment that I was in for. It was silly of me to assume that saying anything at all would earn respect. Especially when I was raised to believe that respect is something given, not earned. I'm in no place to ask you to take my advice by trying to live your own life without needing to have me agree with you, but I may as well recomend that to you because it makes for a much happier lifestyle. 
    I'd also like to ask if we could skip to the part where we all agree to disagree? You are welcome to do that at any time. You don't need anyone else to stop responding; YOU need to if you are done. I know you all have very valid things to say, but I can most likely guarantee you that I've heard it before either through this forum alone or elsewhere in my life. I don't need any more rudeness or hurtful remarks. As rude as that request may seem, it's very consuming to read these every weekend. I respect you all and I know that few to none of you respect me. I'm willing to fully accept that. I knew that would happen the moment I said yes. Now that we're clear, is that a fair request?

    Lastly, I don't need any of you to be my friend. We're on a forum. So I'm not understanding AT ALL what you want here. I don't remember you participating in ANY other discussions so far. You just keep responding to this one thread. Just very confused about your goals here. If you don't want to make friends OR enemies, what brings you here? Not being snarky; I am genuinely perplexed. If you want to comment on my posts, great! If you don't, great! I'll be happy to read and comment on your posts when I see them. When I refer to the relationships that I'll build with you, I'm simply talking about the next 3-6 months that I'll be on this website. I have plenty of friends in my actual life. I'm not really interested in making any more through a website. You don't need to worry about rejecting me. 

    Absolutely none of this was written in sarcasm. It may seem like it, but you have my word.
    I hope you all have a great day!

    KeptInStitchesdoeydo
  • doeydo said:
    I just read through this entire thread and am shocked at how in denial you seem to be about how your age affects your ability to make adult decisions and how it will affect your marriage.  These men and women have good points, and you should listen to them instead of just brushing them aside as if "This won't happen to me/doesn't apply to me".  Also, I think a sad and large part of you choosing to get married right away has to do with your religiousness and wanting to wait for sex until marriage.  If you get married now, you can have sinless sex, as I am sure you two are tempted to.   http://forums.thenest.com/discussion/12014507/did-anyone-wait#latest  In case anyone is interested. 
    OP, when I was a teenager I was constantly referred to as mature for my age, but I still made stupid decisions that I regret now.  I have been dating my FI since I was 16.  We got started living together and got engaged when I was 20, and plan on getting married when I am 22.   I have changed a hell of a lot since we started dating.  I am in college and working.  My FI, who is older than myself, also works.  I love him to death, and if you had asked me a couple of years ago if I thought we would get married and be together forever I would undoubtedly have said yes. Lately, though, we have been having a few issues and honestly, right now I am not sure how it will work out, but I hope it does.
    So, you seriously do not have a favourite book?  
    I just want you to think about what you seriously just said to me. 

    I have absolutely no words.

    Think as you wish.
  • AuroraRose41AuroraRose41 New York member
    500 Love Its 1000 Comments Second Anniversary Name Dropper
    edited April 2014
    wiggsaj said:

    If the OP ever returns, I just want to chime in. I am also one of the younger ones on TK (just turned 23 years old).  I moved across the country away from everything I had ever known at age 22, and left behind my current boyfriend who I had been dating for over a year at the time, never knowing when I would see him next. That was the one of the most difficult things that I ever had to do, but the job offer was too great to pass up. At 17, I would have laughed in your face out of disbelief if you told me that I would end up on the opposite coast in a few years. We talked about breaking up, just so that we would both have a chance to be with someone close by to where we each lived. Fortunately a few months after my move, he got a better job offer near where I lived, and we now live together. My point is, there are going to be things that you couldn't even imagine happen in the next few years of your life. Those are going to be exponentially more difficult to work out if you are married.

    What happens if you get a teaching job in an area of the country hours away from your fiance at the end of college? Have you considered that possibility? Yes. We will find something local so that we never have to be so far away from family. Someone that I know who went to Harvard for a teaching degree is currently teaching in China. What if that happens to you? I agree with previous posters in that if it is meant to be, it will work out eventually.

    Also, I would like to know how you plan on financing a house with no credit? Guess what, you get good credit by having loans, and a small credit card won't help to improve your credit score as much as a large car loan that you don't miss payments on would. Just something else to consider. There are plenty of other ways to build credit. For example, renting an apartment and paying on time every month. Having a credit card and making maximum payments on it. Renting property and paying every month on time. It's not required to take loans on big purchases if you can afford to do otherwise.

    Thank you for your concern, though. 
    & I truly appreciate the inside view. Thanks for sharing your story!
    @wiggsaj to the white highlighted statement, did you even read my anecdote? If life was that easy, I WOULDN'T HAVE MOVED ACROSS THE COUNTRY FROM MY FAMILY AND MY BOYFRIEND. There were companies hiring for my position in the area where I grew up. The pay sucked and the working conditions were even worse. These same companies fired friends of mine who had graduated the year before, and went and rehired new people, who are also on the verge of losing their jobs. As a result, I took a job with much better pay and a better working environment, at the cost of moving to the opposite side of the U.S. from where I grew up. The economy and job market still are not that great at the moment, and there is no good way to predict where you will end up after college, because you grow and change in college. What happens if there are no available teaching jobs in that area once you both graduate? What happens if only one of you gets a job in that area, but the other one gets rejected for jobs in that area? These things happen a whole lot more often then you think, and a matter of fact statement like that shows all of us that you really haven't thought any of this through. You are, in fact, acting like a teenager who knows everything, and you absolutely don't. I am not attacking you; I am pointing out that you need to think things through a lot more, and focusing on getting through college and finding a good job should be at the top of your priority list.

    If you can't listen to this advice and the advice that other PP's have given you, then you are not mature enough for marriage. Marriage requires listening to someone else, even if you don't fully agree with it at first, and actually considering what that person has to say. PP's have given you great advice on here, and it would be wise of you to listen.

    ETF: punctuation.

    doeydoGoldenPenguinKeptInStitchesluckysnorkel
  • @Swazzle, I apologize for the long post below.

    @Wiggsaj, you are going to do what you're going to do regardless of what is said on this board. You will get married in July, and thats your choice. Not everyone is going to be supportive of your marriage, because the idea of being married at your age is unfathomable to a majority of us. Its really nice that you have all the optimism in the world, but I hope you take the time to read what is being said, and handle this feedback with grace. 

    Right now, I'm more concerned as to whether or not you've formed a fully developed identity outside of your relationship. I believe that couples your age should grow together, but develop independently. College/your early twenties is a time of growth, change, and a lot of obstacles. I feel as though you are limiting yourself by getting married this early. I get the feeling that you haven't been "independent" (i.e. spending extended time periods away from your home, church, your FI, close family members, being totally 100% financially independent etc.) for very long. It may benefit you to wait in order to gain more experience in being independent as it is a critical life skill/ a good tool to have in case things start going south in your relationship. I know that your mind is set in stone, and that you're gonna walk down that aisle come hell or high water, but I sincerely hope that you heed my advice in terms of growing together but developing independently.
     


    mbross3
  • ShallowSeasShallowSeas Indianapolis, IN member
    Sixth Anniversary 1000 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    wiggsaj said:
    Viczaesar said:
    wiggsaj said:
    So it takes a complete explination of each and every life decision to "gain" respect from all of you? 

    I didn't even want to answer your questions because I know that no matter what I would have said, you would have argued that I was being immature. I don't respond at all, I'm immature. I don't answer your questions because I don't care what you all have to say about my decisions when you don't know me, I'm immature. I try to answer your questions in the very most polite and respectable way I possibly can, I'm immature. I say I don't like to read, I'm immature. I say I love Jesus, I'm immature. I say that it's politically incorrect to ask a woman if she's pregnant, I'm immature. I say that I can't wait to get to know all of you, I'm immature.

    My family, my friends, my coworkers, my pastors, even my grandparents (who were married at 18 and just celebrated their 40th anniversary) are all blindly convinced that even though I'm a "speshul snowflake" (whatever that is) that my relationship is very healthy and they foresee it lasting forever. Literally the only issue that we could have due to our age would be finances, and because we've been saving for so long, we could put a heafty downpayment on a house. So finances are not an issue for us either. 

    Yes, we will change in our tewnties. And our thirties. And our fourties. But isn't the art of a relationship growing and changing together? I've changed more in the last three years of my life than I have changed ever sense I was a toddler, and all three of those years have been a dance between he and myself. We change and grow together through communication, sharing precious time, laughs, tears, and many kisses. Our relationship is based off of mutual respect, trust, and love of each other and Jesus. When we fight, we do not yell or scream, we discover. There is no hiding your feelings in our relationship. We think before we talk and we ALWAYS talk through everything. We go through premarital counseling and relationship classes. We know the statistics. We know the odds. More importantly than all of that, we love each other faithfully and endlessly, and we know that for a fact. 

    Why do I want to get married right now?
    When I look at my future, my past, and today, I couldn't be happier with the way it all looks. I can't picture myself traveling the world, going to school, or further discovering myself without my best friend beside me in the process. You all ask me, "why now" and I can't help but answer with "why wait?" They say that when you know, you just know. You guys, I'm so happy. I really am so happy. I know I've got so much to learn about being a bride and being a wife. Quite honestly, I'll probably never quite figure it out. But I can't wait to start that adventure with my beautiful soon to be husband. People have honestly told me that I should feel so lucky because I've found a man who loves me more than most people will ever be loved in their whole life, and that even more so, I've found him while I'm so young. This isn't like some little fling. This isn't one of those break-up-every-week-but-want-to-get-married-to-make-it-officail type of things. No, this is something very beautiful and special. 

    All of you that are trying to tell me that I should expect this type of behavior, you should be especially ashamed of yourselves. If we all met up and had coffee one day, none of you would even guess my age unless I told you. I'm a very honest young woman, so I'd tell you, but we could talk for hours before you'd know. I don't mean the way I look, because standing next to 17 year olds I look 17 while standing next to 22 year olds I look 22 (according to just about everyone who has met me). I mean that I'm not an ignorant child, but rather a very sensitive old soul. The people that have actually met me have all agreed. If any of you had an ounce of education in psychology, you'd know that the things you notice about other people are things you actually notice about yourself. Directly translated: I'm very sorry that you all feel insecure about yourselves or your relationships. I pray blessings over your current or future marriages. 

    That's my piece. If I had the time or the energy to tell you all the reasons I'm getting married than I would. However this is not my first rodeo and I'm not ignorant enough to believe that any of you would actually respect me after reading this. I know that your 2-10 years of life experience gives you all "wisdom" but the fact that I actually know me, and I know the situation in it's entirety gives me a leg up over any word of advice coming from someone who doesn't know anything about me other than my age and the fact that I don't like to read. I know some of you will quote me and type in some snide remarks about how "immature" or "wrong" I am, or about how something I said is "BS." Some of you will comment and explain how what I'm doing is stupid and I shouldn't go through with it because the odds are against me, or anyway they were against you when you were 17. Some of you wont even respond either due to the fact that you have no idea what you should say or because you wont be waisting your time with someone as immature as myself. I, on the other hand, will continue being "rude" and get back to my real human life. As you all know, it's Sunday and I'm not going to be back for another 5 days (or 12 years, as some of you like to exaggerate).

    While I'm gone, just remember that no matter what you say on this forum, I wont judge you as a human being, and I continue to anticipate the relationships I'll create with you. I'm sure that outside of this, you are all beautiful people who would never honestly think it's appropriate to treat a person this way. So, I will accept all of your snide remarks or completely rude comments as "congratulations on your engagement!" :)

    For that, thanks!



    Is this an example of the "college education" you're supposedly getting? 
    If you were reading, you'd know that I'm not taking college classes to be a psychologist. I'm taking them to be a teacher. 
    I googled it to find an article for you all to read, if you don't believe me. 
    It's pretty funny how I could find at least 4 articles on something that doesn't exist in the first page of the google search. Hmm.

    Must be because I am uneducated.

    Please enjoy the following:





    We don't really have to read your intro to figure that out...
    Anniversary
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    mbross3
  • pinkcow13pinkcow13 The Concrete Jungle member
    2500 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its First Answer
    OP, you are so young. I have been with my FI since we were 18 (we are now both 29), and we still managed to have wonderful lives without rushing into marriage. In fact, I can honestly say we would probably not have survived marriage at such a young age. We finished college together, got excellent jobs, lived in our own apartments, I started grad school, and we did all these things together as a couple, without having to be married. I can honestly say that I changed so much from when I was 17, 18, and the fact that FI and I did not rush into anything has kept us strong. My HS bff moved in with her BF at 17, and decided to postpone college and work full time because she was sure he was the one. Now, she is back living at home after a few failed relationships, and just finished school last year.

    I wish you luck, and hope you weigh your decision carefully. At the end of the day you are going to do what you want. So, good luck to you and your FI I do wish you both the best. I am hoping that you defy the odds and have a long and happy marriage.
                                 Anniversary
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    JCbride2015parkera92
  • @jcbride2014- that's a big one for me too- law school.  It wasn't even a consideration in my mind at 17-  that consideration arose at 23 as a result of the things I'd done, the people I'd met, and the growth experiences I'd had in the meantime. 

    I truly do remember how mature,capable, wise and confident I felt at 17.  I was a freshman in college at 17.  It won't be for another 5-10 years, OP, until you realize how obscenely young 17 is. That's normal!!

     

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    mbross3JCbride2015AuroraRose41parkera92
  • AuroraRose41AuroraRose41 New York member
    500 Love Its 1000 Comments Second Anniversary Name Dropper

    @JCBride2014 and @carliealissa, I am currently 23 and considering law school in the next year or two (currently studying for the LSAT; any tips would be super appreciated!).

    @wiggsaj At 17, I was dead set on engineering, and now, with an engineering degree in hand and a dream job for most engineers, I don't like it as much as I thought I would! This is what I was trying to tell you in my earlier posts; that you do change a lot and grow a lot in your late teens to early 20's, and at 17 no one knows what their future truly holds. You might have an idea now, but that could easily change in a year or two, and that's what this time should be about!


    carliealissa
  • @JCBride2014 This speaks to me as well! I made the decision to go to law school after a few years out from college and some work experience, etc. BF and I had only been together for a year at that point, but he decided that he was in a place where his life was flexible enough that he could move with me to a new state to go to school. I was able to accept a high ranked law school and move to a new city because we weren't tied down and completely settled in our old city. Best decision we've made!
    JCbride2015AuroraRose41carliealissaashley8918
  • mbross3mbross3 member
    250 Love Its 100 Comments First Anniversary First Answer
    edited April 2014
    doeydo said:
    I just read through this entire thread and am shocked at how in denial you seem to be about how your age affects your ability to make adult decisions and how it will affect your marriage.  These men and women have good points, and you should listen to them instead of just brushing them aside as if "This won't happen to me/doesn't apply to me".  Also, I think a sad and large part of you choosing to get married right away has to do with your religiousness and wanting to wait for sex until marriage.  If you get married now, you can have sinless sex, as I am sure you two are tempted to.   http://forums.thenest.com/discussion/12014507/did-anyone-wait#latest  In case anyone is interested. 
    OP, when I was a teenager I was constantly referred to as mature for my age, but I still made stupid decisions that I regret now.  I have been dating my FI since I was 16.  We got started living together and got engaged when I was 20, and plan on getting married when I am 22.   I have changed a hell of a lot since we started dating.  I am in college and working.  My FI, who is older than myself, also works.  I love him to death, and if you had asked me a couple of years ago if I thought we would get married and be together forever I would undoubtedly have said yes. Lately, though, we have been having a few issues and honestly, right now I am not sure how it will work out, but I hope it does.
    So, you seriously do not have a favourite book?  
    Omg, this is so common where I'm from. Common, irritating, and the marriages don't last. 


    ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    UGH I just read this other post. OP you try so hard to disclaim judgment, and obviously you're very defensive (another sign of your age), but you seem unable to realize that you are, in fact, judging everyone else. You are throwing out "statistics" (FWIW you can find "sources" on the internet to support anything) and judgments on decisions whether or not to wait for marriage to have sex, and using these tools to justify your choices while demeaning PP knowledge, relationships, and choices. FWIW saying "no offense" does not negate offensive or judgmental statements. You saying "I'm not judging" in one breath and in the next claiming that you're "pure" because you are waiting for sex and everyone who doesn't is impure, hey that is judgment. 

    Everyone here is offering you advice, not judgment. People have shared their stories, offered insights, and answered your questions. People were honest with you and were met with defensiveness and judgment in return. Honestly, you're wasting everyone's time. 

    ETA: idk what is up with the quote box!!
    GoldenPenguinKeptInStitchesdoeydo
  • @JCBride2014 and @carliealissa, I am currently 23 and considering law school in the next year or two (currently studying for the LSAT; any tips would be super appreciated!).

    @wiggsaj At 17, I was dead set on engineering, and now, with an engineering degree in hand and a dream job for most engineers, I don't like it as much as I thought I would! This is what I was trying to tell you in my earlier posts; that you do change a lot and grow a lot in your late teens to early 20's, and at 17 no one knows what their future truly holds. You might have an idea now, but that could easily change in a year or two, and that's what this time should be about!

    Hi Aurora,  I actually didn't study for the LSAT.  I just kind of took it to see what would happen, and it was all downhill from there- lol jk :) My advice, easier said than done I guess, would be to remain as calm and relaxed as possible about the whole thing.  I remember there were a LOT of people taking and retaking it, so anxiety-ridden, freaking out like they felt their life depended on the outcome of the test.  I think that the fact that I wasn't nervous at all, because in my mind I had nothing riding on it, was the reason I did so well.

    It's just another standardized test, whatever the outcome, things will work out :)

     

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    AuroraRose41mbross3
  • JCbride2015JCbride2015 Dirty Jerz member
    5000 Comments 500 Love Its Second Anniversary First Answer
    edited April 2014
    @AuroraRose41 PM me if you want to chat more, but here are my basic thoughts.  Law school is a good idea if you have a really clear idea of what you want to do and think you can get a specific job-- ex. you are an engineer (and interested in patent law, right?) so you plan to use that experience and join the field as a lawyer.  Not a good idea for people just out of undergrad who think law school is just the next best thing to do.  It sounds like you're on a pretty targeted path and have some work experience under your belt, so you are already in a good position!

    The LSAT: unlike @carliealissa, I actually think you should really study.  I studied out of a book off-and-on for a few weeks, got a very good score, and went to a law school ranked in the 20s.  I was bored off my ass and somewhat unhappy for the whole first year, got almost straight A's, and then transferred to my current Ivy League school where I am much more challenged and have better job prospects.  I'm not telling you this to brag about my grades, but to point out that my current school did not accept me the first time around because my LSAT was in a low 90s percentile, not the 95th+ percentile.  Those few points really matter if you are already doing well.  It can make the difference between, say, Harvard and Fordham (not my actual schools).

    I did not take an LSAT class the first time around because I didn't want to spend the $2k.  Now I wish I had, because I probably could have squeaked out the points that would make a difference, and I could have avoided transferring.

    Anyway.  It all worked out, I have a great job lined up, and I'm really excited to graduate and start working.  But I would advise it's worth some time and money to do your best on the LSAT because just a few points can make or break you at some schools.

    ETA: but I echo Carlie's advice not to stress or freak out too much.  Preparing =/= freaking out.  This is also true for final exam time.  Yes, study, prepare, work hard.  But stay away from the law library, don't let other people psych you out, and try to relax.
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    "I'm not a rude bitch.  I'm ten rude bitches in a large coat."

    carliealissaAuroraRose41Fran1985 BrandNewJ
  • @JCBride2014- that's interesting.  At the time I took the LSAT, I didn't really think of it as an exam you could/really needed to prepare for, in that they aren't testing your knowledge base.  I thought unless you were having a really off day, you'd be likely to score within a few points range no matter how much studying you do.  I scored 96th percentile.  (Lucky for me because my undergrad grades weren't so hot, and also I needed all the scholarship money I could get.)  Then again, a couple points wouldn't have mattered so much for me since I was looking at lower tiered schools.  Congrats on Ivy League, that's pretty awesome!  Best of luck to you starting your career.

     

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  • AuroraRose41AuroraRose41 New York member
    500 Love Its 1000 Comments Second Anniversary Name Dropper

    @JCBride2014 and @carliealissa thanks! I am an engineer, and would go into patent law if I do make that jump. My company makes all of it's profits off of their IP, and actually have a training program to transfer engineers over to the IP law group/patent counsel department as an associate, help with the cost of tuition at a law school that my company has a partnership with, and guarantee you a job at the end as a patent attorney in the department (contingent on grades). So I am actually only interested in this one school, which is not an Ivy or top 20 law school overall, but it's good enough for my Fortune 500 company to partner with (I think it is in the top 20 for IP law though). The top LSAT scores are normally 75th-80th percentile, and I think it is very attainable as a result. Of course, I want to score as high as possible to increase my chances, but I am not too nervous about taking it. I am more nervous about breaching the subject with my manager! I have a few prep books that I have already studied, and have more studying to do, but it is helping me achieve those few extra points.

    @wiggsaj, sorry to thread hijack, but I want to illustrate a point here. The advice these ladies have given me on law school in this thread has been very insightful, and it's from people who have been in similar situations to the one that I am considering. All of the ladies in this thread have been trying to do the same for you.


    mbross3JCbride2015
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