Breastfeeding controversy in my town. What say ye? UPDATED with links to the articles

aleighc3

Well, her hormones are still all out of whack, so I can see how she could be exaggerating, but in any case, being told to stop breast feeding your child would upset any mother.

mysticl

CrazyCatLady3 said:

Two points:

1) I don't think women are offended by the sight of a breast per se, it's the bodily function aspect of it that grosses some people out a little.  I fall in the middle on this.  I don't care if you want to BF in the park, at a coffee shop etc, but I would be grossed out if you did it at the dinner table.  Breast milk can also carry diseases, etc. so I think this is where some people get squeamish.  

2) If people think there should be no problem openly exposing boobs in the public for BFing, then why are they laws against toplessness?  Would you be okay if a woman who was hot on a 95 degree day decided to take off her shirt and bra and walk around topless because she felt uncomfortable in her clothes?

Very few diseases are transmitted via breastmilk.  In fact if the mother is sick she is often encouraged to breastfeed because her milk will contain antibodies to whatever she has and those antibodies will help protect the baby.  If the mother does have a disease that has potential to be transmitted via breastmilk (for example HIV) then she most likely won't be breastfeeding because she doesn't want to infect her child.  

ETA:  How is the dinner table not an appropriate place for someone to eat their dinner?

jdluvr06

aleighc3 said:

Well, her hormones are still all out of whack, so I can see how she could be exaggerating, but in any case, being told to stop breast feeding your child would upset any mother.

If he told her to stop. For all we know he asked her to use a cover or something and she got mad and started spewing that he told her to stop feeding and to "put it away". I do think she was exaggerating based on the interviews I watched but no one except the woman and the police officer know what was said and so far we only have one side of the story.

aleighc3

jdluvr06 said:

aleighc3 said:

Well, her hormones are still all out of whack, so I can see how she could be exaggerating, but in any case, being told to stop breast feeding your child would upset any mother.

If he told her to stop. For all we know he asked her to use a cover or something and she got mad and started spewing that he told her to stop feeding and to "put it away". I do think she was exaggerating based on the interviews I watched but no one except the woman and the police officer know what was said and so far we only have one side of the story.

I can agree that we don't know what really happened. BUT if he did tell her that, then he would be in the wrong...in my opinion.

mysticl

PrettyGirlLost said:

grumbledore said:

PrettyGirlLost said:

grumbledore said:

Two points:

1) I don't think women are offended by the sight of a breast per se, it's the bodily function aspect of it that grosses some people out a little.  I fall in the middle on this.  I don't care if you want to BF in the park, at a coffee shop etc, but I would be grossed out if you did it at the dinner table.  Breast milk can also carry diseases, etc. so I think this is where some people get squeamish.  

2) If people think there should be no problem openly exposing boobs in the public for BFing, then why are they laws against toplessness?  Would you be okay if a woman who was hot on a 95 degree day decided to take off her shirt and bra and walk around topless because she felt uncomfortable in her clothes?

Good point. I actually think it's absurd that women are required to cover their breasts.

I don't.  I don't neccessarily want to see your boobs.  I think women of all shapes and sizes are gorgeous and boobs are amazing and I wish I had them, but I don't necessarily want to see you topless.

I don't want to see hairy ass dudes walking around topless either.  And I sure as hell don't want to see men walking around with their schlongs hanging out. . . that would be the next argument- Well if it's ok for women to walk around topless now. . .

I don't care if a women is BFing in public, but it makes me feel of less of a voyeur if she is discreet about it and covers up. . . and 99% of the women I have seen BFing in public already do this.

I also agree that I would never want to BF in a public restroom, nor would I ever think it was ok to ask another woman to do so.

And PS the "you" I was referring to earlier in this post is the general "you" and not grumbledore.  I do not presume to make any statements about her breasts!

I don't want to see 99.9% of men shirtless either, but they have the right to be and so should I.

Also, a breast is not a penis.

Yep, but the reason women can't walk around topless and men can't walk around with their schlongs hanging out are the same- it's illegal and deemed indecent.

Although supposedly it isn't actually illegal for women to walk around topless in same states. . . someone posted this a few posts up.

In some states the law says a woman cannot show her nipples, it says nothing about breast tissue. She can walk around without a shirt on as long as her nipples are covered.  So a couple of bandaids would make her legal. However, men can show their nipples.  What makes male nipples acceptable and female nipples obscene?  

Also, those laws do not apply when a woman is in the act of breastfeeding.  In other words if her nipple is exposed while in the process of getting the baby to latch on or when the baby unlatches it is not illegal.  

kkitkat79

Maggie0829 said:

Maggie0829 said:

CrazyCatLady3 said:

kaos16 said:

http://www.27east.com/news/article.cfm/Westhampton-Beach-Surrounding-Areas/58802/Woman-Hoping-Local-Cops-Can-Be-Eduacated-About-Breastfeeding

http://riverheadlocal.com/local-news/nurse-in-demonstration-planned-for-riverhead-police-hq-saturday

These are two of the articles about the incident. . . . one referencing the nurse-in the woman now has decided to have.

 

Yeah, if the lady was BFing in her car, I don't see why the cop made a big deal of it.  If he was uncomfortable talking to her like that, he should have just waited until she was done and got out of the car.

Um, cops have other things to do and can't always just wait around until someone is ready to give their statement, especially when that person is the one who called them out for help.

It would be like calling a plumber in an emergency and when they arrive you tell them they have to wait to fix your sink because you are doing dishes.  No, that is not how that works.

I think part of being a police officer is knowing how to provide the service of "serve and protect" to the satisfaction of those he "serves and protects". There are so many better ways the police officer could've handled that situation other than saying "put that away" and "I'm not going to ask you again". And yes, he could've waited for five minutes because that's his job. That woman (if she's paying taxes) is paying his salary. And that training they are getting is ridiculous. The only option is for them to ask the mother to cover up. What if the baby won't nurse under covers? That training is build with one and only one thought in mind, the comfort of the officer, not the comfort of the public they are supposed to serve. Oh, and it's not like doing dishes at all unless you are comparing the need of the dish to be washed to the need of the baby to be fed.

I'm sorry but you are kidding me with this shit right? If the woman called the police then it must have been an emergency. And when they respond to the call their job is to get interviews done and get to the bottom of the disturbance to sort things out so that they can then get back out on the road to respond to other calls. They should not have to wait for someone to finish breastfeeding her child, or someone to finish their dinner, or someone to finish folding some shirts. When you call the police you should have the respect to follow their orders and speak to them in a timely manner. 

And the training is not built for their comfort. Like many other people have said on here, that training is to protect them from dumb ass perv charges being brought against them because the woman in question may not like how they handled the situation if it didn't end in her favor. 

And also who really even knows if he said those words to her in that manner. For all we know she could be making it up or taking the words out of context to help her story. 

But it seriously irritates the fuck out of me that so many people are ready to blame the cop in any situation because god forbid people take responsibility for their own actions.

Not kidding actually, no. She was in the car, right? How difficult is to talk to a person in the car without looking at them? He is standing up, she is sitting down... his line of sight would be above her head. Or he could've turned around. Does he have to gaze into her eyes while talking to her. No. It would be more convenient for him, but totally not necessary. And that's my point, had he only bothered to think outside the box I'm sure he could've arrived at a solution that was acceptable to both him and the mother. But, it would've taken some effort on his part. I am not saying all police officers are like that, but that particular one was just lazy. And training that suggests to a mother to either wait for a female officer or cover up is designed with officer's comfort in mind, not the mother. I am not saying that the police officers shouldn't be trained to protect themselves, but I don't think it's too much to ask to make that training a bit more population friendly.

SJM7538

I would like to weigh in on this bc H is a police officer and I just asked him about what he would do in this situation.

His response was that if she was in the privacy of her own home it would not be appropriate to ask. Since she was technically in public (outside in the car) it was fine of the officer to ask but he said it wasn't necessary. He said that since she is in public and choosing to breast feed out in the open then she is making the choice to potentially expose herself and if she tried to make a claim that the officer was staring she would have no claim. So maybe the officer was trying to cover his @ss
But I don't believe it was necessary in the situation.

And I would also like to say that it disappoints me to the See PPs saying negative things about law enforcement and that he "could have waited." My H goes to work every day and I don't know if he is going to come home or not. He risks not coming home to me for safety of the public... So no if you call the police then don't expect them to wait. Some towns don't have more than a few officers on at a time. If another call comes in and someone is in serous danger or is dying but the officer can't leave bc "he has to wait wait for someone to finish breast feeding or to finish their dinner" then that is not okay.


Lots of officers are also first responders... What if your grandma is having a heart attack and the police show up five minutes too late bc someone wants to finis their dinner? Then is it okay for him to wait?

pinkshorts27

kkitkat79 said:

Maggie0829 said:

Maggie0829 said:

CrazyCatLady3 said:

kaos16 said:

http://www.27east.com/news/article.cfm/Westhampton-Beach-Surrounding-Areas/58802/Woman-Hoping-Local-Cops-Can-Be-Eduacated-About-Breastfeeding

http://riverheadlocal.com/local-news/nurse-in-demonstration-planned-for-riverhead-police-hq-saturday

These are two of the articles about the incident. . . . one referencing the nurse-in the woman now has decided to have.

 

Yeah, if the lady was BFing in her car, I don't see why the cop made a big deal of it.  If he was uncomfortable talking to her like that, he should have just waited until she was done and got out of the car.

Um, cops have other things to do and can't always just wait around until someone is ready to give their statement, especially when that person is the one who called them out for help.

It would be like calling a plumber in an emergency and when they arrive you tell them they have to wait to fix your sink because you are doing dishes.  No, that is not how that works.

I think part of being a police officer is knowing how to provide the service of "serve and protect" to the satisfaction of those he "serves and protects". There are so many better ways the police officer could've handled that situation other than saying "put that away" and "I'm not going to ask you again". And yes, he could've waited for five minutes because that's his job. That woman (if she's paying taxes) is paying his salary. And that training they are getting is ridiculous. The only option is for them to ask the mother to cover up. What if the baby won't nurse under covers? That training is build with one and only one thought in mind, the comfort of the officer, not the comfort of the public they are supposed to serve. Oh, and it's not like doing dishes at all unless you are comparing the need of the dish to be washed to the need of the baby to be fed.

I'm sorry but you are kidding me with this shit right? If the woman called the police then it must have been an emergency. And when they respond to the call their job is to get interviews done and get to the bottom of the disturbance to sort things out so that they can then get back out on the road to respond to other calls. They should not have to wait for someone to finish breastfeeding her child, or someone to finish their dinner, or someone to finish folding some shirts. When you call the police you should have the respect to follow their orders and speak to them in a timely manner. 

And the training is not built for their comfort. Like many other people have said on here, that training is to protect them from dumb ass perv charges being brought against them because the woman in question may not like how they handled the situation if it didn't end in her favor. 

And also who really even knows if he said those words to her in that manner. For all we know she could be making it up or taking the words out of context to help her story. 

But it seriously irritates the fuck out of me that so many people are ready to blame the cop in any situation because god forbid people take responsibility for their own actions.

Not kidding actually, no. She was in the car, right? How difficult is to talk to a person in the car without looking at them? He is standing up, she is sitting down... his line of sight would be above her head. Or he could've turned around. Does he have to gaze into her eyes while talking to her. No. It would be more convenient for him, but totally not necessary. And that's my point, had he only bothered to think outside the box I'm sure he could've arrived at a solution that was acceptable to both him and the mother. But, it would've taken some effort on his part. I am not saying all police officers are like that, but that particular one was just lazy. And training that suggests to a mother to either wait for a female officer or cover up is designed with officer's comfort in mind, not the mother. I am not saying that the police officers shouldn't be trained to protect themselves, but I don't think it's too much to ask to make that training a bit more population friendly.

Because a police officer shouldn't be observing her mannerisms to see if something is off.  I don't think it is appropriate for police officer to have to turn his back on her. The officers I know look you in the eyes to observe you and show respect. 

Now, I'm not saying that what he did was right, but to just assume he could turn his back is ridiculous, IMHO. I don't like turning my back on people to talk. Now I'm sure officers in potentially dangerous situations probably don't want to either.

Viczaesar

Ms. Zeledon said she had called the Riverhead Town Police to a Wading River residence to file a report against an acquaintance who she said was violating a court order. The officer arrived on scene, and Ms. Zeledon remained outside in her car with her children, 12-year-old Richard and her 9-week-old daughter, Sophia, while a report was written.

While she was waiting in the car, her daughter became fussy, so Ms. Zeledon said she remained in the car and started to breastfeed. When the officer—who she said had been very polite and helpful until then—returned to the car and observed her breastfeeding the baby, she said he told her to “put that away.”

Taken aback, she said she reminded the officer that it is illegal, under New York State law, to ask a woman who is breastfeeding a child to stop. Out of courtesy, she said she would cover up—to which the officer allegedly responded, “I’m not going to ask you again.” She complied.

“I was in my car,” Ms. Zeledon said. “If I was in a park or at a baseball game, I could understand a little better—I’ve been to sporting events, and I won’t breastfeed there—but for a grown man of a legal caliber of authority to come and intimidate you in that way, and to tell you, ‘I don’t want to have to tell you again,’ that is inappropriate,” she said. “I honestly thought at the time that if I didn’t cover up, he was going to arrest me.”

According to New York State Penal Code 79-e, women have the right to nurse babies in public and should not be told to cover up or leave: “Notwithstanding any other provision of law, a mother may breast feed her baby in any location, public or private, where the mother is otherwise authorized to be, irrespective of whether or not the nipple of the mother’s breast is covered during or incidental to the breast feeding.”

lyndausvi

pinkshorts27 said:

kkitkat79 said:

Maggie0829 said:

Maggie0829 said:

CrazyCatLady3 said:

kaos16 said:

http://www.27east.com/news/article.cfm/Westhampton-Beach-Surrounding-Areas/58802/Woman-Hoping-Local-Cops-Can-Be-Eduacated-About-Breastfeeding

http://riverheadlocal.com/local-news/nurse-in-demonstration-planned-for-riverhead-police-hq-saturday

These are two of the articles about the incident. . . . one referencing the nurse-in the woman now has decided to have.

 

Yeah, if the lady was BFing in her car, I don't see why the cop made a big deal of it.  If he was uncomfortable talking to her like that, he should have just waited until she was done and got out of the car.

Um, cops have other things to do and can't always just wait around until someone is ready to give their statement, especially when that person is the one who called them out for help.

It would be like calling a plumber in an emergency and when they arrive you tell them they have to wait to fix your sink because you are doing dishes.  No, that is not how that works.

I think part of being a police officer is knowing how to provide the service of "serve and protect" to the satisfaction of those he "serves and protects". There are so many better ways the police officer could've handled that situation other than saying "put that away" and "I'm not going to ask you again". And yes, he could've waited for five minutes because that's his job. That woman (if she's paying taxes) is paying his salary. And that training they are getting is ridiculous. The only option is for them to ask the mother to cover up. What if the baby won't nurse under covers? That training is build with one and only one thought in mind, the comfort of the officer, not the comfort of the public they are supposed to serve. Oh, and it's not like doing dishes at all unless you are comparing the need of the dish to be washed to the need of the baby to be fed.

I'm sorry but you are kidding me with this shit right? If the woman called the police then it must have been an emergency. And when they respond to the call their job is to get interviews done and get to the bottom of the disturbance to sort things out so that they can then get back out on the road to respond to other calls. They should not have to wait for someone to finish breastfeeding her child, or someone to finish their dinner, or someone to finish folding some shirts. When you call the police you should have the respect to follow their orders and speak to them in a timely manner. 

And the training is not built for their comfort. Like many other people have said on here, that training is to protect them from dumb ass perv charges being brought against them because the woman in question may not like how they handled the situation if it didn't end in her favor. 

And also who really even knows if he said those words to her in that manner. For all we know she could be making it up or taking the words out of context to help her story. 

But it seriously irritates the fuck out of me that so many people are ready to blame the cop in any situation because god forbid people take responsibility for their own actions.

Not kidding actually, no. She was in the car, right? How difficult is to talk to a person in the car without looking at them? He is standing up, she is sitting down... his line of sight would be above her head. Or he could've turned around. Does he have to gaze into her eyes while talking to her. No. It would be more convenient for him, but totally not necessary. And that's my point, had he only bothered to think outside the box I'm sure he could've arrived at a solution that was acceptable to both him and the mother. But, it would've taken some effort on his part. I am not saying all police officers are like that, but that particular one was just lazy. And training that suggests to a mother to either wait for a female officer or cover up is designed with officer's comfort in mind, not the mother. I am not saying that the police officers shouldn't be trained to protect themselves, but I don't think it's too much to ask to make that training a bit more population friendly.

Because a police officer shouldn't be observing her mannerisms to see if something is off.  I don't think it is appropriate for police officer to have to turn his back on her. The officers I know look you in the eyes to observe you and show respect. 

Now, I'm not saying that what he did was right, but to just assume he could turn his back is ridiculous, IMHO. I don't like turning my back on people to talk. Now I'm sure officers in potentially dangerous situations probably don't want to either.

He could have turned around?  You are fucking kidding me?  A cop turning around could become a dead cop at the hands of a breastfeeding mom.      

kkitkat79

lyndausvi said:

pinkshorts27 said:

kkitkat79 said:

Maggie0829 said:

Maggie0829 said:

CrazyCatLady3 said:

kaos16 said:

http://www.27east.com/news/article.cfm/Westhampton-Beach-Surrounding-Areas/58802/Woman-Hoping-Local-Cops-Can-Be-Eduacated-About-Breastfeeding

http://riverheadlocal.com/local-news/nurse-in-demonstration-planned-for-riverhead-police-hq-saturday

These are two of the articles about the incident. . . . one referencing the nurse-in the woman now has decided to have.

 

Yeah, if the lady was BFing in her car, I don't see why the cop made a big deal of it.  If he was uncomfortable talking to her like that, he should have just waited until she was done and got out of the car.

Um, cops have other things to do and can't always just wait around until someone is ready to give their statement, especially when that person is the one who called them out for help.

It would be like calling a plumber in an emergency and when they arrive you tell them they have to wait to fix your sink because you are doing dishes.  No, that is not how that works.

I think part of being a police officer is knowing how to provide the service of "serve and protect" to the satisfaction of those he "serves and protects". There are so many better ways the police officer could've handled that situation other than saying "put that away" and "I'm not going to ask you again". And yes, he could've waited for five minutes because that's his job. That woman (if she's paying taxes) is paying his salary. And that training they are getting is ridiculous. The only option is for them to ask the mother to cover up. What if the baby won't nurse under covers? That training is build with one and only one thought in mind, the comfort of the officer, not the comfort of the public they are supposed to serve. Oh, and it's not like doing dishes at all unless you are comparing the need of the dish to be washed to the need of the baby to be fed.

I'm sorry but you are kidding me with this shit right? If the woman called the police then it must have been an emergency. And when they respond to the call their job is to get interviews done and get to the bottom of the disturbance to sort things out so that they can then get back out on the road to respond to other calls. They should not have to wait for someone to finish breastfeeding her child, or someone to finish their dinner, or someone to finish folding some shirts. When you call the police you should have the respect to follow their orders and speak to them in a timely manner. 

And the training is not built for their comfort. Like many other people have said on here, that training is to protect them from dumb ass perv charges being brought against them because the woman in question may not like how they handled the situation if it didn't end in her favor. 

And also who really even knows if he said those words to her in that manner. For all we know she could be making it up or taking the words out of context to help her story. 

But it seriously irritates the fuck out of me that so many people are ready to blame the cop in any situation because god forbid people take responsibility for their own actions.

Not kidding actually, no. She was in the car, right? How difficult is to talk to a person in the car without looking at them? He is standing up, she is sitting down... his line of sight would be above her head. Or he could've turned around. Does he have to gaze into her eyes while talking to her. No. It would be more convenient for him, but totally not necessary. And that's my point, had he only bothered to think outside the box I'm sure he could've arrived at a solution that was acceptable to both him and the mother. But, it would've taken some effort on his part. I am not saying all police officers are like that, but that particular one was just lazy. And training that suggests to a mother to either wait for a female officer or cover up is designed with officer's comfort in mind, not the mother. I am not saying that the police officers shouldn't be trained to protect themselves, but I don't think it's too much to ask to make that training a bit more population friendly.

Because a police officer shouldn't be observing her mannerisms to see if something is off.  I don't think it is appropriate for police officer to have to turn his back on her. The officers I know look you in the eyes to observe you and show respect. 

Now, I'm not saying that what he did was right, but to just assume he could turn his back is ridiculous, IMHO. I don't like turning my back on people to talk. Now I'm sure officers in potentially dangerous situations probably don't want to either.

He could have turned around?  You are fucking kidding me?  A cop turning around could become a dead cop at the hands of a breastfeeding mom.      

You right, I take it back. He should not have turned around. He should have, as a police officer, followed the law and allowed the mother to finish breastfeeding while taking her statement. Because, as mentioned in PP, in that state a mother has the right to breastfeed in public regardless of what is showing. 

Or, like I say previously, and I stand by what I said, the police officer should have thought outside the box and figured out how to take the statement without asking the mother to cover up or stop breastfeeding. His job is to serve and protect, he should've have been doing that. I realize that the job is difficult, but that is not a good excuse to do it poorly.

Maggie0829

All of you defending the mother and saying that the cop could have just turned around or looked above her head are freaking ridiculous and apparently have no knowledge of what it is like and what it takes to be a police officer. Sure he could have turned around and then she could have pulled a gun and shot him. She could have pulled a knife and stabbed him. She could have taken off in her car possibly hitting him and placing her kids in danger. No police officer will look away from a person that they are supposed to be questioning and taking a statement from. Actually I am surprised he didn't ask her to step out of her vehicle.

And the person saying her hormones are still out of whack. What the actual fuck?! Sorry but you can't use hormones as an excuse for shitty behavior. And again just because the woman said that the officer spoke to her in a certain manner and told her "to put that away" is pretty much heresay and edited to make her look like a victim.

aleighc3

Yeah, what the actual fuck! Do you have any children? If you have you would realize that sometimes, that hormones have an effect on the way that people feel or maybe even the way that people take things. Huh, I can't wait until you have kids, and someone tells you to stop feeding you child NO MATTER what the situation is. Oh I also forgot that ALL cops are saints. Sorry, not buying it.

monkeysip

I have absolutely no disrespect for cops, and I know they have a tough job.  I agree the cop shouldn't just turn around or something.

But I just find it ridiculous that a cop shouldn't be able to look at her while she does that.  I'm not criticizing the cop *if* that's how he was instructed.  Cops need to follow their orders.  But if that was his orders, his orders are dumb.

Nudity (and modesty in general) depends on CONTEXT.  A woman in a bikini at a beach is perfectly normal.  A woman in a bikini at church is not normal.  A doctor examining a naked patient has nothing to do with indecency or sexuality.  No one would ask an injured person to "cover up".  I view breastfeeding in a *similar* fashion.  The context of the nudity (although there really isn't much nudity at all with breastfeeding) renders it not indecent or sexual.  

If a woman were to claim that a cop were looking at her breasts, it would seem clear that that was her choice to expose herself to feed her child.  I doubt any breastfeeding woman would claim that.

SJM7538

aleighc3 said:

Yeah, what the actual fuck! Do you have any children? If you have you would realize that sometimes, that hormones have an effect on the way that people feel or maybe even the way that people take things. Huh, I can't wait until you have kids, and someone tells you to stop feeding you child NO MATTER what the situation is. Oh I also forgot that ALL cops are saints. Sorry, not buying it.

No you are right, not all cops are saints. But when there is another potential emergency or god forbid a life threatening situation going on that isn't getting much needed attention bc someone expects an officer to wait (for whatever reason. Not just breast feeding) then yes that situation will take precedent and if it involves asking a mother to stop feeding her child then so be it.

Maggie0829

Well the lasts two posts have solidified my decision to bow out of this discussion. There is just too much crazy for me and you can't talk to crazy in an adult or logical manner.

kkitkat79

Maggie0829 said:

And again just because the woman said that the officer spoke to her in a certain manner and told her "to put that away" is pretty much heresay and edited to make her look like a victim.

And exactly what is her incentive to lie? From what I have read she made the call, was waiting in the car, and while waiting started breastfeeding. She wasn't the one in trouble so it's not like she's trying to get way with something by framing the police officer. On the other hand I can see why the police officer is on the defensive. He did something that was against the state law. Of course he's going to try and justify himself. And I have no trouble believing that he did in fact told her to stop or cover up in those exact words because, as PP mentioned in this thread, some people find breastfeeding repulsive and disgusting. He was disgusted and because he's the police he thought he could get way with asking her to stop or to cover up. 

Again, not saying that the entire police force everywhere is like that, but some are and based on the information in the article and the fact that the mother has no incentive at all to lie I believe her.

aleighc3

bye.

SJM7538

kkitkat79 said:

Maggie0829 said:

And again just because the woman said that the officer spoke to her in a certain manner and told her "to put that away" is pretty much heresay and edited to make her look like a victim.

And exactly what is her incentive to lie? From what I have read she made the call, was waiting in the car, and while waiting started breastfeeding. She wasn't the one in trouble so it's not like she's trying to get way with something by framing the police officer. On the other hand I can see why the police officer is on the defensive. He did something that was against the state law. Of course he's going to try and justify himself. And I have no trouble believing that he did in fact told her to stop or cover up in those exact words because, as PP mentioned in this thread, some people find breastfeeding repulsive and disgusting. He was disgusted and because he's the police he thought he could get way with asking her to stop or to cover up.
Again, not saying that the entire police force everywhere is like that, but some are and based on the information in the article and the fact that the mother has no incentive at all to lie I believe her.


I think the fact that she went straight to the media says a lot about her right there. We live in a world where people complain and sue each other over the most ridiculous crap.

I can see filing a complaint against the officer if she really felt that he acted inappropriately, which she is well within her right to do, but what's the point in going to the media other the to stir up controversy and gain attention.

PrettyGirlLost

kkitkat79 said:

Maggie0829 said:

And again just because the woman said that the officer spoke to her in a certain manner and told her "to put that away" is pretty much heresay and edited to make her look like a victim.

And exactly what is her incentive to lie? From what I have read she made the call, was waiting in the car, and while waiting started breastfeeding. She wasn't the one in trouble so it's not like she's trying to get way with something by framing the police officer. On the other hand I can see why the police officer is on the defensive. He did something that was against the state law. Of course he's going to try and justify himself. And I have no trouble believing that he did in fact told her to stop or cover up in those exact words because, as PP mentioned in this thread, some people find breastfeeding repulsive and disgusting. He was disgusted and because he's the police he thought he could get way with asking her to stop or to cover up. 

Again, not saying that the entire police force everywhere is like that, but some are and based on the information in the article and the fact that the mother has no incentive at all to lie I believe her.

To stir up shit, gain publicity, to get on TV.  Who the hell knows.  People do a lot of lying and say a lot of shit to get their 10 seconds of fame.

And news stories are typically not reported in an unbiased manner so I take everything I read- be it from a local paper, an article on BBC, or CNN, Fox, etc- with a heavy dose of salt.

kkitkat79

SJM7538 said:

Maggie0829 said:

And again just because the woman said that the officer spoke to her in a certain manner and told her "to put that away" is pretty much heresay and edited to make her look like a victim.

And exactly what is her incentive to lie? From what I have read she made the call, was waiting in the car, and while waiting started breastfeeding. She wasn't the one in trouble so it's not like she's trying to get way with something by framing the police officer. On the other hand I can see why the police officer is on the defensive. He did something that was against the state law. Of course he's going to try and justify himself. And I have no trouble believing that he did in fact told her to stop or cover up in those exact words because, as PP mentioned in this thread, some people find breastfeeding repulsive and disgusting. He was disgusted and because he's the police he thought he could get way with asking her to stop or to cover up. Again, not saying that the entire police force everywhere is like that, but some are and based on the information in the article and the fact that the mother has no incentive at all to lie I believe her.

I think the fact that she went straight to the media says a lot about her right there. We live in a world where people complain and sue each other over the most ridiculous crap. I can see filing a complaint against the officer if she really felt that he acted inappropriately, which she is well within her right to do, but what's the point in going to the media other the to stir up controversy and gain attention.

Only when a police officer breaks the law that he is supposed to uphold it is not ridiculous crap. And she did not sue him nor did she go straight to the media. She contacted the chief and all she was looking for was a recognition that the officer was out of line. Instead she got the "he didn't do anything wrong" line.

We only have those rights that we can defend and good on that woman for standing up for hers. I guess gay people should just quietly write to their congressmen instead of publicly protesting. After all stirring up controversy and directing public attention to a problem never got anyone anywhere. What's the point indeed. 

grumbledore

Viczaesar said:

Ms. Zeledon said she had called the Riverhead Town Police to a Wading River residence to file a report against an acquaintance who she said was violating a court order. The officer arrived on scene, and Ms. Zeledon remained outside in her car with her children, 12-year-old Richard and her 9-week-old daughter, Sophia, while a report was written.

While she was waiting in the car, her daughter became fussy, so Ms. Zeledon said she remained in the car and started to breastfeed. When the officer—who she said had been very polite and helpful until then—returned to the car and observed her breastfeeding the baby, she said he told her to “put that away.”

Taken aback, she said she reminded the officer that it is illegal, under New York State law, to ask a woman who is breastfeeding a child to stop. Out of courtesy, she said she would cover up—to which the officer allegedly responded, “I’m not going to ask you again.” She complied.

“I was in my car,” Ms. Zeledon said. “If I was in a park or at a baseball game, I could understand a little better—I’ve been to sporting events, and I won’t breastfeed there—but for a grown man of a legal caliber of authority to come and intimidate you in that way, and to tell you, ‘I don’t want to have to tell you again,’ that is inappropriate,” she said. “I honestly thought at the time that if I didn’t cover up, he was going to arrest me.”

According to New York State Penal Code 79-e, women have the right to nurse babies in public and should not be told to cover up or leave: “Notwithstanding any other provision of law, a mother may breast feed her baby in any location, public or private, where the mother is otherwise authorized to be, irrespective of whether or not the nipple of the mother’s breast is covered during or incidental to the breast feeding.”

Shut up with your facts.

theartistformerlyknownas

Hey everybody. Let's all go watch Emma Stone's lip sync battle and be friends. Today has been enough of a headache. :-*

aleighc3

grumbledore said:

Viczaesar said:

Ms. Zeledon said she had called the Riverhead Town Police to a Wading River residence to file a report against an acquaintance who she said was violating a court order. The officer arrived on scene, and Ms. Zeledon remained outside in her car with her children, 12-year-old Richard and her 9-week-old daughter, Sophia, while a report was written.

While she was waiting in the car, her daughter became fussy, so Ms. Zeledon said she remained in the car and started to breastfeed. When the officer—who she said had been very polite and helpful until then—returned to the car and observed her breastfeeding the baby, she said he told her to “put that away.”

Taken aback, she said she reminded the officer that it is illegal, under New York State law, to ask a woman who is breastfeeding a child to stop. Out of courtesy, she said she would cover up—to which the officer allegedly responded, “I’m not going to ask you again.” She complied.

“I was in my car,” Ms. Zeledon said. “If I was in a park or at a baseball game, I could understand a little better—I’ve been to sporting events, and I won’t breastfeed there—but for a grown man of a legal caliber of authority to come and intimidate you in that way, and to tell you, ‘I don’t want to have to tell you again,’ that is inappropriate,” she said. “I honestly thought at the time that if I didn’t cover up, he was going to arrest me.”

According to New York State Penal Code 79-e, women have the right to nurse babies in public and should not be told to cover up or leave: “Notwithstanding any other provision of law, a mother may breast feed her baby in any location, public or private, where the mother is otherwise authorized to be, irrespective of whether or not the nipple of the mother’s breast is covered during or incidental to the breast feeding.”

Shut up with your facts.

wow

MairePoppy

aleighc3 - I believe grumbledore was engaging in sarcasm : )

SJM7538

kkitkat79 said:

SJM7538 said:

kkitkat79 said:

Maggie0829 said:

And again just because the woman said that the officer spoke to her in a certain manner and told her "to put that away" is pretty much heresay and edited to make her look like a victim.

And exactly what is her incentive to lie? From what I have read she made the call, was waiting in the car, and while waiting started breastfeeding. She wasn't the one in trouble so it's not like she's trying to get way with something by framing the police officer. On the other hand I can see why the police officer is on the defensive. He did something that was against the state law. Of course he's going to try and justify himself. And I have no trouble believing that he did in fact told her to stop or cover up in those exact words because, as PP mentioned in this thread, some people find breastfeeding repulsive and disgusting. He was disgusted and because he's the police he thought he could get way with asking her to stop or to cover up.
Again, not saying that the entire police force everywhere is like that, but some are and based on the information in the article and the fact that the mother has no incentive at all to lie I believe her.

I think the fact that she went straight to the media says a lot about her right there. We live in a world where people complain and sue each other over the most ridiculous crap.

I can see filing a complaint against the officer if she really felt that he acted inappropriately, which she is well within her right to do, but what's the point in going to the media other the to stir up controversy and gain attention.

Only when a police officer breaks the law that he is supposed to uphold it is not ridiculous crap. And she did not sue him nor did she go straight to the media. She contacted the chief and all she was looking for was a recognition that the officer was out of line. Instead she got the "he didn't do anything wrong" line.

We only have those rights that we can defend and good on that woman for standing up for hers. I guess gay people should just quietly write to their congressmen instead of publicly protesting. After all stirring up controversy and directing public attention to a problem never got anyone anywhere. What's the point indeed. 

I never said she sued him, I was just making a point that people make a big deal out of ridiculous things. And I was wrong when I said she went straight to the media, my fault for misreading the article. However... The fact that she went to the media at all over this issue I think is ridiculous and was only done for attention. That's just my opinion. If contacting the chief didn't get the response she wanted then she could have filed a complaint against the officer and his behavior would have been looked.


And I don't think this can really be compared to gay people publicly protesting. It's different. She's not trying to get laws put into place for breast feeding mothers (those already exist as previously stated) and she wasn't claiming discrimination.

She was upset about the behavior of the officer. How is going to the media going to correct the officers behavior if he acted inappropriately? It's not, all it's going to do is draw negative attention to the police department. As if their jobs aren't hard enough.

banana468

AmandaE13 said:

I have no problems with women breastfeeding.  In public or in the privacy of her home.  Covered or uncovered.  If the mom feels comfortable without being covered then so be it.  What I do have a problem with are the ones that don't cover up "just because they can" and want to start controversy.  At that point it feels like she's trying to make a point rather than provide sustenance for her child.

For those of you that say the police officer should have waited until she was done - uh what?  He's got things to do.  She called him.  Why couldn't SHE have waited a few minutes.  The article says the officer returned to the car.  So that indicates he had already been there and talking to Andrea.  Why couldn't she have waited a few more minutes until he was finished and leaving and then start feeding her baby?  Do you drop everything you're doing the moment you start to feel hungry and make yourself food?

There are two sides to a story.  This article was written to make the mom look like the victim.  If the officer were to give his side, the truth would probably lie somewhere in the middle.

We are talking about a 9 wk old. At that age, a newborn feeds on demand. It's pretty preposterous to compare the eating habits of an adult to a human that often requires nourishment every 2-3 hours.

theartistformerlyknownas

Do you drop everything you're doing the moment you start to feel hungry and make yourself food?

Yes. It's in everyone's best interests.

kaos16

A lot of the articles indicate that the baby is 11 months old. The video shows a decent sized baby. I have no idea how old he or she really is.

I haven't given my two cents yet, or any other background info that I have, so I will now.

1. Apparently this woman has a reputation throughout town as a pot stirrer. The father of the child, whose house this incident took place at allegedly has an order of protection from what I understand.

2. The Police officer involved is pretty new, so he would have just completed any and all police training within the previous year or two. I am friends with someone close to him, and have always heard him to "not have a mean bone in his body"

My take: the woman was probably already agitated when the police officer showed up, as I imagine custody issues to be stressful for all parties involved. I'm sure a fussy child adds stress to that situation. We'll never know what exactly the officer said to her, but based on how new he is it it would make sense to me that he'd ask her to cover up. I think police officers are well aware of the sue-happy society in which we live.

I find it ridiculous as a person in the legal field that everyone is out to sue anyone and everyone at the drop of a hat, that's my personal opinion. If this woman was offended by the officer's actions (which is her right) she should have gone through the proper channels at the police department instead of turning it into a media circus. I think she turned a very simple disagreement into much more than it needed to be.

Lastly, as someone who works with police on a regular basis, I firmly believe that they are the same as any group of people...... You have your good and bad representatives of the bunch. I am grateful that we have a police force to protect us, even if there are some bad ones in the bunch!

banana468

Ok. 11 mo is much different from 9 wks!