Wedding Etiquette Forum

good grief

245

Re: good grief

  • chibiyui said:
    Honey, have yourself a margarita and calm down. No one was bashing you.

    When I first started posting on here, I got my ass (rightfully) handed to me. There was nothing in the honeymoon thread to get upset over. We all have bad ideas, thats why we bounce ideas off people.
    She probably has to grow the hell up 1st before she can legally have a margarita. . . unless the drinking age in your state is 12 ;-)

    She should also grow the hell up before she gets married.

    "Love is the one thing we're capable of perceiving that transcends time and space."


  • Shout out to @PrettyGirlLost for having my favourite siggy right now. Sorry to everyone else. :)
  • I lurk sometimes, but when I heard the $$ dance was tacky, I was shocked, surprised but also understood.  Apparently this was a Polish custom that was brought to America.  When I went to several wedding when I was younger, they had the $$ dance but I never thought any thing of it.

    Personally I wouldn't even consider one, even though my FI is half Polish/half Italian.

    @loveislouder - I agree with you about thinking all of the regulars on here have got our asses handed to us once or twice.
  • Shout out to @PrettyGirlLost for having my favourite siggy right now. Sorry to everyone else. :)
    QFT.

    Srsly, I love your sig.
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    Anniversary
  • tiphenieB said:
    I see the people who don't have lives are the only ones commenting..... I'm making a general statement. I have been reading other discussions and its the same thing. People (all of you) bashing brides for their plans in their weddings.... get a life.

    So you posted this thread to not get comments? Riiiight. That's a good one!
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  • chibiyui said:
    Shout out to @PrettyGirlLost for having my favourite siggy right now. Sorry to everyone else. :)
    QFT.

    Srsly, I love your sig.
    Thank you!

    The smoosh cat is how I feel on here some days.  I can be cute and unassuming and then BAM!  The claws come out!!!

    "Love is the one thing we're capable of perceiving that transcends time and space."


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    But for real, no one was bashing you.

    You have a terrible idea.  Etiquette exists to help you treat your family and friends with dignity and respect, without looking like an ass.  Just because it's 2014 does not mean you can be rude.  

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  • Shout out to @PrettyGirlLost for having my favourite siggy right now. Sorry to everyone else. :)
    No one can resist the Smoosh!!!!

    "Love is the one thing we're capable of perceiving that transcends time and space."


  • OP, when I first started reading the message boards I thought the tone could get a bit harsh sometimes too. Until I realized that the ladies on here really, genuinely CARE, and their main concern is helping out. Granted, every so often you will see a post that maybe crosses the line a bit, and feel free to call that person out when it happens. But overall, no one is here to be mean. No one is here because they "don't have a life," and no one would bother to spend time replying to posts if they didn't want to help. 

    People didn't agree with you. Maybe that offends you. But take a deep breath, accept some constructive criticism, and stop being offended. Trust me, these Knotties are total life savers. They've helped me out more times than I can count. And yeah, they can be brutally honest. But if you didn't want honest opinions, then why did you ask in the first place? 

    THIS.  I'm in the same boat here.  When I first came I thought wow! these people are just being mean!  And even posted a few times about how everyone needs to back off.. but now that I have stuck around, I see that a lot of the reasoning behind these forums makes sense, and I have taken the advice from several of the threads in planning my own wedding.  What the "knotties" here are trying to do it save you from potential embarrassment. 
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  • beetherybeethery member
    5000 Comments 500 Love Its First Anniversary First Answer
    edited October 2014
    tiphenieB said:
    I see the people who don't have lives are the only ones commenting..... I'm making a general statement. I have been reading other discussions and its the same thing. People (all of you) bashing brides for their plans in their weddings.... get a life.
    Please go back to your life, hopefully it doesn't require driving (I'd fear for others) or thought. You are clearly incapable.

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    I'm the fuck
    out.

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  • Oh look, another 'mean brides' post.

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  • esstee33 said:
    penguin44 said:
    penguin44 said:
    esstee33 said:
    penguin44 said:
    The etiquette forum is probably not for you...

    **SITB** 

    Or, like, the internet in general. 
    Well yeah. But this would be like me going to a penguin-killing website (I hope this doesn't exist), and then getting upset that they talk about killing penguins.
    Oh, man, I really hope a website like that doesn't exist. 

    Although, sidenote: Did you know there's a bar in Japan at which you can actually watch live penguins? http://www.penginbar.jp/en/

    I would get so wasted, just sitting there watching penguins. 
    That is so cool! I just sent the link to DH. Haha. I'm pretty sure people think I'm weird when I go see the penguins at the zoo. I stand there for about 30 minutes. Is that not normal?
    That's how I am with lemurs and fruit bats. At the Cleveland Zoo, the fruit bats are in this huge enclosure with lots of space in front of it, so I sit right there on the floor and just watch them. I absolutely love bats. 
    I'm sad I joined in on this so late. I adore penguins. DH always makes fun of me at the zoo, because not only do I spend a good chunk of time watching them, I always go back a second time before we leave. Also, love bats. Everyone else thinks I'm crazy. I totally love them. I'd have one as a pet if a could. A penguin too.

    And now, getting back on track, OP, I'll add my name to the list of people who got their ass handed to them their first post. My feelings were so hurt that I didn't come back for months. But the comments made stayed with me, and they made me think a lot. Made me reevaluate some things. (This was about a family conflict and how to handle it at the wedding.) I eventually came back and learned a lot. So take a deep breath, reflect on what was said, and then move on with your life. Hopefully, you'll even come back here and learn a couple things, just like the rest of us did.
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  • Bingo!

    I'm extra miffed because TWICE I gave you very thoughtful, even historical, explanations for why honeyfunds are tacky but regular registries are not.  I guess that must have been over your head. Sorry, next time I'll use more age-appropriate language.
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
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    "I'm not a rude bitch.  I'm ten rude bitches in a large coat."


  • tiphenieB said:

    I see the people who don't have lives are the only ones commenting..... I'm making a general statement. I have been reading other discussions and its the same thing. People (all of you) bashing brides for their plans in their weddings.... get a life.

    We don't have a life?  Hey, as a certain someone once said....

    "YOU DON'T KNOW ME!"


    *snort*

    I just laughed way too hard. You win the internet.
    Anniversary
  • I have a real question. Is that your real name? Is it pronounced like Tiffany? I'm genuinely curious.

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  • I think a lot of it, too, is that we have 18 threads about one topic on the main page and get sick of answering the same damn question over and over when there are other topics RIGHT THERE.

    I get that it's hard to search, but come on. The main page? Your situation is no different than the 18 other brides who asked about registering when they already have everything they need, want to create a honeyfund, don't have any money, etc. Seriously.
  • Seriously? This is the TK equivalent of facebook statusing "I'm SO upset and I don't want to talk about it!"

    Your plan was rude, and strangers told you so. Please tell me how we should support rude plans? If someone asks me if it is OK to invite someone to dinner, and then demand £50 at the end, I am going to say "No, that is rude". You can see how laughable it would be for that person to then say "WHY DON'T YOU SUPPORT ME?!?!?!?!"


    ...and at least I have lived enough life to know how to spell the name "Tiffany" correctly...
  • I know I'm late to the party and that you are probably not reading this, but for those who are...I too was dished some straight up cold advice that I didn't like.  It made me want to be defensive and almost deterred me from coming back. 

    But then, I lurked some more and started to realize that these people are only trying to help.  They have no personal stake, at all, in what you do at your wedding.  In the end, I learned to love them...and they gave some great advice to both me and the others on what we can do and what we should avoid.

    Thanks to TK forums I had a great etiquette approved wedding and guess what, everyone loved it.  Everyone had a great time, and some people even thanked me for not doing things that are tacky/rude.  So there's that!

  • I know I'm late to the party and that you are probably not reading this, but for those who are...I too was dished some straight up cold advice that I didn't like.  It made me want to be defensive and almost deterred me from coming back. 

    But then, I lurked some more and started to realize that these people are only trying to help.  They have no personal stake, at all, in what you do at your wedding.  In the end, I learned to love them...and they gave some great advice to both me and the others on what we can do and what we should avoid.

    Thanks to TK forums I had a great etiquette approved wedding and guess what, everyone loved it.  Everyone had a great time, and some people even thanked me for not doing things that are tacky/rude.  So there's that!

    Agreed!  I quit this site and came back four or five times.  I didn't realize when I first posted that the reason I was getting such an abrupt answer was because the regulars get the same question five times a day and are tired.  Take the good advice from the answers and learn to ignore the abruptness of them.
  • I think the ladies on here are very supportive. I got a few replies to quesitons that hurt my feelings too, but I listened and had a much better wedding because of it.

    ANDalsoPLUS in your Honeyfund thread, you actually, literally said: Thank you to everyone who replied. It is nice to get outside opinions. :)

    So, I guess you take that back now?

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