I feel like we haven't had a naughty TMI thread in a while

doeydo

lacqueredlover said:

Yeah and if you are having to imagine people other than the person you're having sex with, well you might want to look into that.

Honestly that's how I finally knew it was over with my ex, I mean I knew before that that it had to end and we weren't right for each other, but once I found I could no longer orgasm with him, well that was what gave me the kick in the ass to finally do it (and how he knew it was a problem.)

Faking orgasms only hurts yourself, that's always been a big no-no for me.  

And if you're having trouble achieving orgasm even with being attracted, well that's what vibrators during sex are for.  There are some really cool couples ones available now too!

(Can you tell I used to write a sex column in college and that I have a friend who works in a sex shop?  haha)

Hmm.  Before being with my SO, I slept around a fair bit.  I think I was attracted to some of the guys, one of which we had had great cyber sex before (he lived far away) but it was kind of meh when we got together in person.  As for with SO, I think I was attracted to him especially during the beginning.  Still didn't do anything for me sex-wise.  
Regarding masturbation, I've only ever gotten off to stuff like Suicide Girls and porn made by and for lesbians.  Big (or small) penises and the actual PinV doesn't turn me on at all.  IDK, maybe I'm just weird sexually.
ETA there are hot guys out there.  Like Daniel Radcliffe, lemme at him.  I don't want to make it sounds like I am a lesbian or something (not anything wrong with lesbians at all, I just reread what I wrote and thought it might sounds that way).  Daniel Radcliffe had a tiny sex scene with another dude in Kill Your Darlings and it turned me on, TBH.

lacqueredlover

doeydo said:

lacqueredlover said:

Yeah and if you are having to imagine people other than the person you're having sex with, well you might want to look into that.

Honestly that's how I finally knew it was over with my ex, I mean I knew before that that it had to end and we weren't right for each other, but once I found I could no longer orgasm with him, well that was what gave me the kick in the ass to finally do it (and how he knew it was a problem.)

Faking orgasms only hurts yourself, that's always been a big no-no for me.  

And if you're having trouble achieving orgasm even with being attracted, well that's what vibrators during sex are for.  There are some really cool couples ones available now too!

(Can you tell I used to write a sex column in college and that I have a friend who works in a sex shop?  haha)

Hmm.  Before being with my SO, I slept around a fair bit.  I think I was attracted to some of the guys, one of which we had had great cyber sex before (he lived far away) but it was kind of meh when we got together in person.  As for with SO, I think I was attracted to him especially during the beginning.  Still didn't do anything for me sex-wise.  
Regarding masturbation, I've only ever gotten off to stuff like Suicide Girls and porn made by and for lesbians.  Big (or small) penises and the actual PinV doesn't turn me on at all.  IDK, maybe I'm just weird sexually.

We're all weird sexually ;-)

Have you ever tried having sex with a woman?  Just a thought, might do something differently for you!

doeydo

lacqueredlover said:

doeydo said:

lacqueredlover said:

Yeah and if you are having to imagine people other than the person you're having sex with, well you might want to look into that.

Honestly that's how I finally knew it was over with my ex, I mean I knew before that that it had to end and we weren't right for each other, but once I found I could no longer orgasm with him, well that was what gave me the kick in the ass to finally do it (and how he knew it was a problem.)

Faking orgasms only hurts yourself, that's always been a big no-no for me.  

And if you're having trouble achieving orgasm even with being attracted, well that's what vibrators during sex are for.  There are some really cool couples ones available now too!

(Can you tell I used to write a sex column in college and that I have a friend who works in a sex shop?  haha)

Hmm.  Before being with my SO, I slept around a fair bit.  I think I was attracted to some of the guys, one of which we had had great cyber sex before (he lived far away) but it was kind of meh when we got together in person.  As for with SO, I think I was attracted to him especially during the beginning.  Still didn't do anything for me sex-wise.  
Regarding masturbation, I've only ever gotten off to stuff like Suicide Girls and porn made by and for lesbians.  Big (or small) penises and the actual PinV doesn't turn me on at all.  IDK, maybe I'm just weird sexually.

We're all weird sexually ;-)

Have you ever tried having sex with a woman?  Just a thought, might do something differently for you!

Oh gosh I'd love to, but no I haven't yet.  And thanks  

theartistformerlyknownas

doeydo said:

lacqueredlover said:

Yeah and if you are having to imagine people other than the person you're having sex with, well you might want to look into that.

Honestly that's how I finally knew it was over with my ex, I mean I knew before that that it had to end and we weren't right for each other, but once I found I could no longer orgasm with him, well that was what gave me the kick in the ass to finally do it (and how he knew it was a problem.)

Faking orgasms only hurts yourself, that's always been a big no-no for me.  

And if you're having trouble achieving orgasm even with being attracted, well that's what vibrators during sex are for.  There are some really cool couples ones available now too!

(Can you tell I used to write a sex column in college and that I have a friend who works in a sex shop?  haha)

Hmm.  Before being with my SO, I slept around a fair bit.  I think I was attracted to some of the guys, one of which we had had great cyber sex before (he lived far away) but it was kind of meh when we got together in person.  As for with SO, I think I was attracted to him especially during the beginning.  Still didn't do anything for me sex-wise.  
Regarding masturbation, I've only ever gotten off to stuff like Suicide Girls and porn made by and for lesbians.  Big (or small) penises and the actual PinV doesn't turn me on at all.  IDK, maybe I'm just weird sexually.
ETA there are hot guys out there.  Like Daniel Radcliffe, lemme at him.  I don't want to make it sounds like I am a lesbian or something (not anything wrong with lesbians at all, I just reread what I wrote and thought it might sounds that way).  Daniel Radcliffe had a tiny sex scene with another dude in Kill Your Darlings and it turned me on, TBH.

That doesn't sound weird, it sounds like you don't like dudes. You should more than THINK you're attracted to someone, especially your SO.

Thinking someone you've never met is hot isn't the same as being sexually attracted to them. I think Mila Kunis is hot as hell but that doesn't mean I want to have sex with her. If you put us in a room together I'd probably just ask her how she gets her hair so shiny.

esstee33

I think I understand what @doeydo‌ is getting at, and I don't t think it sounds like she doesn't like dudes.

For me, I'm like 98% straight. If pressed for an answer, I'd say "straight-ish." I've fooled around with women and every time it's been like "Ehhhhh, yeah, this is doing basically nothing for me." I had no desire to do anything more than making out and small amounts of petting, because it just wasn't there. Like, it was fun, no doubt, but each time it's just reaffirmed that I'm mostly into men.

That said, women are fucking beautiful and there's nothing that gets me hotter than thinking about them during sex. Specifically, it's the mental image of women *being pleasured* that really gets me going. And it's not just porn chicks; sometimes it's just ordinary women who happen to have some quality I find attractive. I'm super into FI and what he's doing while I'm thinking about it, too. I'm not trying to imagine I'm with someone else. FI is hot as fuck and I'm thrilled with our sex life. I just like thinkin' about hot chicks, too.

sarawifenow

Not to thread jack, but has anyone had a WTF thought that popped into their head during sex? So last night, H and I were getting it on and all of the sudden my mind went to, "it would be so hot if H banged me while I was making Christmas dinner..." Then I thought about it a little more and, no, that would be unsanitary.

climbingsingle

sarawifenow said:

Not to thread jack, but has anyone had a WTF thought that popped into their head during sex? So last night, H and I were getting it on and all of the sudden my mind went to, "it would be so hot if H banged me while I was making Christmas dinner..." Then I thought about it a little more and, no, that would be unsanitary.

Yes, and it was tramautizing. I don't even think I can discuss it. 

Sugargirl1019

I had my jingle bell lingerie on, hair curled, red lipstick on when DH came home from work... He said maybe later, I don't want us to get all messed up before we go shopping. Super angry. So it's like 11 now and I put my lingerie back on and it's totally not sexy now and he seems to want to do something but I fell. asleep. While he was touching me. And now this morning I'm so upset that yesterday he turned me down when I was all dressed up, (I told him I'd be too tired if we waited) and of course, I fall asleep, which I'm pissed about..

I do not have good juju with sex right now, and he just asked me to have the lingerie on when he gets home from work, but yesterday nobody was home and today everyone will be home when he gets home. And I just can't get on with having sex right now.. And it's been 10 days since the last time. I'm upset about our sex life.

theartistformerlyknownas

Sugargirl1019 said:

I had my jingle bell lingerie on, hair curled, red lipstick on when DH came home from work... He said maybe later, I don't want us to get all messed up before we go shopping. Super angry. So it's like 11 now and I put my lingerie back on and it's totally not sexy now and he seems to want to do something but I fell. asleep. While he was touching me. And now this morning I'm so upset that yesterday he turned me down when I was all dressed up, (I told him I'd be too tired if we waited) and of course, I fall asleep, which I'm pissed about.. I do not have good juju with sex right now, and he just asked me to have the lingerie on when he gets home from work, but yesterday nobody was home and today everyone will be home when he gets home. And I just can't get on with having sex right now.. And it's been 10 days since the last time. I'm upset about our sex life.

Hang in there Sugar, you'll be in your own house soon!

Kahlyla

lolo883 said:

Thinking someone you've never met is hot isn't the same as being sexually attracted to them. I think Mila Kunis is hot as hell but that doesn't mean I want to have sex with her. If you put us in a room together I'd probably just ask her how she gets her hair so shiny.

This is so true. I have my list in my head of absolutely gorgeous women, but they seldom coincide with the women I'm actually attracted to (I identify as mostly straight, I guess). Women I would actually want to fool around with (were I single) tend to be a little bit androgynous with a bit of a masculine energy, and they tend to actually be gay or bi. Missy Higgins is probably my biggest actual female crush.

Anyhoo, I orgasm about 99% of the time during intercourse with H. It used to be just with him on top, now it's with me on top as well, and lately I've gotten very close a few times from behind. I think I'm getting more orgasmic in general, though (I'm 32 in case that's relevant). I've been having orgasms in my sleep for a few years now, and as of late I can actually orgasm while watching porn without even touching myself or moving in any way. It's incredibly intense and kind of full-body actually.

jenna8984

I'm super impressed that our sampling is the opposite of most "studies" out there that say 70% no. We're only at 28% no, which is pretty awesome!

beethery

Sugargirl1019 said:

I had my jingle bell lingerie on, hair curled, red lipstick on when DH came home from work... He said maybe later, I don't want us to get all messed up before we go shopping. Super angry. So it's like 11 now and I put my lingerie back on and it's totally not sexy now and he seems to want to do something but I fell. asleep. While he was touching me. And now this morning I'm so upset that yesterday he turned me down when I was all dressed up, (I told him I'd be too tired if we waited) and of course, I fall asleep, which I'm pissed about.. I do not have good juju with sex right now, and he just asked me to have the lingerie on when he gets home from work, but yesterday nobody was home and today everyone will be home when he gets home. And I just can't get on with having sex right now.. And it's been 10 days since the last time. I'm upset about our sex life.

Do what I used to do as a teenager: leave. I'd make excuses to go off wherever, and I'd go pound it out in the car in as secluded place I could find.

It's pretty simple. Also, music/loud TV and locked doors. Work the shit out.

princessofgenovia

Well if we're talking just penis going in and out of a vagina (which in my opinion is the shittiest definition of sex, I've had plenty of sex that didn't require a penis at all), no touching of breasts, nipple stimulation, hair pulling, biting, spanking, clit touching, just pure his penis in and out of my vagina, no, I've never orgasmed that way. Because I've never had sex that way. 

If they aren't playing with my breasts or touching my clit, fucking I am. And that definitely contributes to my orgasm. That's why I do it. Why have sex if I can't derive pleasure from all parts of my body. Bite my neck, stroke my thighs, kiss me, all of that feeds into my orgasm.

Of course, I've only had sex a few times where I didn't orgasm and that was when I first started having sex cause we didn't really know what we were doing. And once because he was fucking shitty in bed and believed once he came sex ended. 

Sugargirl1019

Guys, DH just walked through the door because I've been so upset and was whining about wanting him to leave work..... I can't believe he just came home. Cryinngggg. I start my period this weekend ahhhhhhhh.

theartistformerlyknownas

Sugargirl1019 said:

Guys, DH just walked through the door because I've been so upset and was whining about wanting him to leave work..... I can't believe he just came home. Cryinngggg. I start my period this weekend ahhhhhhhh.

So get off TK and go bang it out!

lacqueredlover

lolo883 said:

Sugargirl1019 said:

Guys, DH just walked through the door because I've been so upset and was whining about wanting him to leave work..... I can't believe he just came home. Cryinngggg. I start my period this weekend ahhhhhhhh.

So get off TK and go bang it out!

Yeah seriously, dont' come on  here to tell us, go spend time with him!  lol

beethery

Sugargirl1019 said:

Guys, DH just walked through the door because I've been so upset and was whining about wanting him to leave work..... I can't believe he just came home. Cryinngggg. I start my period this weekend ahhhhhhhh.

I am not sorry about this.

Figure out how to fuck your husband like an adult. It is not difficult.

lovedryn

Sugargirl1019 said:

Guys, DH just walked through the door because I've been so upset and was whining about wanting him to leave work..... I can't believe he just came home. Cryinngggg. I start my period this weekend ahhhhhhhh.

At least you aren't on now. Sounds like it should be frisky time!

princessofgenovia

beethery said:

Sugargirl1019 said:

Guys, DH just walked through the door because I've been so upset and was whining about wanting him to leave work..... I can't believe he just came home. Cryinngggg. I start my period this weekend ahhhhhhhh.

I am not sorry about this.

Figure out how to fuck your husband like an adult. It is not difficult.

For real. You're married adults. I don't care who is home, go into the bedroom, lock door and bang your brains out. Marriage means a blessing from everyone (even the Pope!) to fuck like bunnies.

Invest in some nice gags if you're worried about people hearing you.

theycallmelinz

princessofgenovia said:

beethery said:

Sugargirl1019 said:

Guys, DH just walked through the door because I've been so upset and was whining about wanting him to leave work..... I can't believe he just came home. Cryinngggg. I start my period this weekend ahhhhhhhh.

I am not sorry about this.

Figure out how to fuck your husband like an adult. It is not difficult.

For real. You're married adults. I don't care who is home, go into the bedroom, lock door and bang your brains out. Marriage means a blessing from everyone (even the Pope!) to fuck like bunnies.

Invest in some nice gags if you're worried about people hearing you.

TBH: Some of the best times FI and I have had were when we were living with my parents and I was burying my face in a pillow to keep quiet. Utilize what you've got!

lacqueredlover

theycallmelinz said:

princessofgenovia said:

beethery said:

Sugargirl1019 said:

Guys, DH just walked through the door because I've been so upset and was whining about wanting him to leave work..... I can't believe he just came home. Cryinngggg. I start my period this weekend ahhhhhhhh.

I am not sorry about this.

Figure out how to fuck your husband like an adult. It is not difficult.

For real. You're married adults. I don't care who is home, go into the bedroom, lock door and bang your brains out. Marriage means a blessing from everyone (even the Pope!) to fuck like bunnies.

Invest in some nice gags if you're worried about people hearing you.

TBH: Some of the best times FI and I have had were when we were living with my parents and I was burying my face in a pillow to keep quiet. Utilize what you've got!

Every time my FI and I stay either at his parents place in Fire Island or my parents place, we have the craziest sex haha.  I mean honestly, we live together, I'm pretty sure the jig is up that we have sex

theycallmelinz

lacqueredlover said:

theycallmelinz said:

princessofgenovia said:

beethery said:

Sugargirl1019 said:

Guys, DH just walked through the door because I've been so upset and was whining about wanting him to leave work..... I can't believe he just came home. Cryinngggg. I start my period this weekend ahhhhhhhh.

I am not sorry about this.

Figure out how to fuck your husband like an adult. It is not difficult.

For real. You're married adults. I don't care who is home, go into the bedroom, lock door and bang your brains out. Marriage means a blessing from everyone (even the Pope!) to fuck like bunnies.

Invest in some nice gags if you're worried about people hearing you.

TBH: Some of the best times FI and I have had were when we were living with my parents and I was burying my face in a pillow to keep quiet. Utilize what you've got!

Every time my FI and I stay either at his parents place in Fire Island or my parents place, we have the craziest sex haha.  I mean honestly, we live together, I'm pretty sure the jig is up that we have sex

Side note: FI and I went out of town this past weekend to visit his family and celebrate early Christmas with them. Those assholes made us sleep in separate rooms. I'm still annoyed by it. I wanted to be all, "I PAY MY OWN BILLS AND CAN SLEEP WITH MY FI IF I WANT TO!!!!"

jenna8984

Even when I was 18 and my then boyfriend used to sleep over my parents' in my twin bed, we had NO problem getting it on hahah

beethery

All I'm getting at is that if you can't figure out to either leave your house, lock your door and expect privacy (as a married adult, this is a reasonable expectation, I can assure you), or time it for when they're not awake, you are not doing it right. 

Granted, I fucked FI after my parents got home with the door wide open and it was fine because we kept it quiet and made sure to pay attention to if someone was coming upstairs. It doesn't take anything close to genius-level intelligence to make the shit happen. If you can't get it together, I'm not sympathetic to your nonsense.

Also, if you insist on wearing jingle-bell lingerie to fuck your husband and you can't handle the mild inconvenience of waiting until no one is home, you need to get a hotel room and get over it.

lacqueredlover

beethery said:

All I'm getting at is that if you can't figure out to either leave your house, lock your door and expect privacy (as a married adult, this is a reasonable expectation, I can assure you), or time it for when they're not awake, you are not doing it right. 

Granted, I fucked FI after my parents got home with the door wide open and it was fine because we kept it quiet and made sure to pay attention to if someone was coming upstairs. It doesn't take anything close to genius-level intelligence to make the shit happen. If you can't get it together, I'm not sympathetic to your nonsense.

Also, if you insist on wearing jingle-bell lingerie to fuck your husband and you can't handle the mild inconvenience of waiting until no one is home, you need to get a hotel room and get over it.

I admit I'm curious about the jingle bell lingerie (I'm too lazy for lingerie haha).  Like does it have bells on the tatas?  Why the need for curled hair and makeup?  Sex isn't like putting on a high school drama play, you just do it when you want to

Sugargirl1019

It's the emotions getting in the way of wanting to do it, not if people are home. Though that was something my sad brain latched onto when it was spiraling out of control whining about why I can't do it.

This morning I just feel so.. sad and my brain keeps trying to lie to me about why we didn't have sex yesterday and I have no motivation today for anything and I'm just randomly crying. I was texting DH about how terrible I feel today and was getting really dramatic asking him to come home because I need him and I broke his computer and I need to send files for the mortgage and I just was overwhelmed and sad. So I was surprised and happy (and crying) when he showed up on his lunch. He came home to check on me and make sure I was okay, because my mind just isn't okay today. I don't know what's going on. I'm going back to sleep now that he's hugged me and reminded me that one loves me despite my crazy moods. Moods? I feel like this way too much though.

beethery

Sugargirl1019 said:

It's the emotions getting in the way of wanting to do it, not if people are home. Though that was something my sad brain latched onto when it was spiraling out of control whining about why I can't do it. This morning I just feel so.. sad and my brain keeps trying to lie to me about why we didn't have sex yesterday and I have no motivation today for anything and I'm just randomly crying. I was texting DH about how terrible I feel today and was getting really dramatic asking him to come home because I need him and I broke his computer and I need to send files for the mortgage and I just was overwhelmed and sad. So I was surprised and happy (and crying) when he showed up on his lunch. He came home to check on me and make sure I was okay, because my mind just isn't okay today. I don't know what's going on. I'm going back to sleep now that he's hugged me and reminded me that one loves me despite my crazy moods. Moods? I feel like this way too much though.

You need to sort out your priorities if you got sad that he wanted to have sex at a different time.

lacqueredlover

I still wanna know about the jingle bell lingerie,...

slothiegal

lacqueredlover said:

I still wanna know about the jingle bell lingerie,...

theartistformerlyknownas

beethery said:

Sugargirl1019 said:

It's the emotions getting in the way of wanting to do it, not if people are home. Though that was something my sad brain latched onto when it was spiraling out of control whining about why I can't do it.

This morning I just feel so.. sad and my brain keeps trying to lie to me about why we didn't have sex yesterday and I have no motivation today for anything and I'm just randomly crying. I was texting DH about how terrible I feel today and was getting really dramatic asking him to come home because I need him and I broke his computer and I need to send files for the mortgage and I just was overwhelmed and sad. So I was surprised and happy (and crying) when he showed up on his lunch. He came home to check on me and make sure I was okay, because my mind just isn't okay today. I don't know what's going on. I'm going back to sleep now that he's hugged me and reminded me that one loves me despite my crazy moods. Moods? I feel like this way too much though.

You need to sort out your priorities if you got sad that he wanted to have sex at a different time.

It's not always that easy to rationalize like that though. I know when I get into depressed funks no amount of logic and reason will convince me that the thing I'm freaking out about is not, in fact, the end of the world. I've had myself thinking that because H made himself chicken after the gym he must not want to eat dinner with me, did I do something wrong, our relationship is in jeopardy, he thinks I'm fat, etc. It's completely neurotic, and I realize that LATER, but in the meantime I'm really sad. Then he comes and asks what's for dinner cuz a whole chicken breast and sweet potato at 4:00 are just a snack, and I try not to let him see what an idiot I am.