Wedding Etiquette Forum

As a guest, would you care if you received a wedding day text (not a group text) from bride/groom?

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Re: As a guest, would you care if you received a wedding day text (not a group text) from bride/groom?

  • scribe95    haha right? i need new friends.

    this comes up because i have spoken with a lot of my friends that are already married, and some of them had problems with people (mostly their younger friends) forgetting the invitations to their weddings, going to the wrong place, etc.

    i feel like some people need their hand held; most people do not though. 


    it would be cool to text out the social media information, but if we have a nice board set up that works just as well. good stuff guys, thanks
    Honestly, this is not my problem on the day of our wedding. If people forget their invitation or don't know where they should park, that's not something I want to be bothered with. I feel like sending out a mass text opens yourself (the B or G) up to a flow of contact from guests throughout the day... when really, depending on the size of your guest list, you probably don't want that happening. JMO.
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    PrettyGirlLostSP29
  • scribe95    haha right? i need new friends.

    this comes up because i have spoken with a lot of my friends that are already married, and some of them had problems with people (mostly their younger friends) forgetting the invitations to their weddings, going to the wrong place, etc.

    i feel like some people need their hand held; most people do not though. 


    it would be cool to text out the social media information, but if we have a nice board set up that works just as well. good stuff guys, thanks
    Yeah but on the morning of your wedding, you are not going to want to be the one holding their hands.  Trust me.

    I had a wedding website, detailed invitatons, and I sent the WP and parents an email that listed times, addresses, and Google Map link directions and people were still calling me the morning of the wedding, asking me questions they should have been able to find the answers to on their own.

    I had no patience for it.

    "Love is the one thing we're capable of perceiving that transcends time and space."


    tcnobleluckysnorkelKnottie0021480
  • I really can't think of any information that would need to be communicated to wedding guests the day off. All of that can be contained on the website, Honestly, getting a text like that would make me think, "Control freak" and "Micro-manager". 
  • scribe95    haha right? i need new friends.

    this comes up because i have spoken with a lot of my friends that are already married, and some of them had problems with people (mostly their younger friends) forgetting the invitations to their weddings, going to the wrong place, etc.

    i feel like some people need their hand held; most people do not though. 


    it would be cool to text out the social media information, but if we have a nice board set up that works just as well. good stuff guys, thanks
    Yeah but on the morning of your wedding, you are not going to want to be the one holding their hands.  Trust me.

    I had a wedding website, detailed invitatons, and I sent the WP and parents an email that listed times, addresses, and Google Map link directions and people were still calling me the morning of the wedding, asking me questions they should have been able to find the answers to on their own.

    I had no patience for it.
    This is a good point -- I found it very helpful in weddings I was in when the bride did send the WP and family a wedding timeline that told us where to be when. This could be done a week or even two weeks before the actual wedding. 

    On the day of my sister's wedding I took her phone and fielded questions as best I could and tried not to bother her unless I didn't know the answer. 
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    Knottie0021480 PrettyGirlLost
  • This reminds me of my 5th graders.. "Before you ask me a question, I want you to think REALLY hard and decide if it's a question you could answer yourself, or you're lazy and want me to do the thinking for you."
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    PrettyGirlLost
  • the way I asked in this thread was "as a guest, would you care..." and these responses are great. some people would be pissed and insulted (I get that); some people not so much (and I understand that too). 

    I have watched weddings unfold and I have listened to others tell their stories, and I know guests still text you, call you, etc. on your wedding day when I had all the same information and made it there just fine. and yes I know, that is their fault blah blah.

    e-mailing the link (again) would work right before. I think my e-mail provider lets you set a date/time ahead of time. 
  • For the more tech savvy, make sure your wedding website has key info like the addresses and times. We are using Appy Couple for our website. It allows guests to access the website online or download the free app. I figure that should head off some day-of confusion. 

  • That would 100% depend on the content of the text.  If you texted me something I already knew from the invite, I'd be annoyed that I was being reminded, as I am adult that can manage my own shit.  But if there was an accident on a certain route to the venue, or for any reason something got postponed, or there was a typo on the invite etc. then I would absolutely be fine with receiving a text to let me know.   
    Basically if it's new information, I think a text would be fine. but if it's old information you're just repeating, trust that your guests can handle their own schedules.  
    image
    Knottie0021480
  • edenisleedenisle member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment Name Dropper
    edited December 2014
    I don't know how I'd feel.  I don't think it would upset me, though.

    I do know where you are coming from.  My fiance was in a wedding 2 months ago that we flew to California for.  Being that he was in the wedding, I didn't try to micromanage him and assumed that he would know the details of time, etc.  That was a mistake on my part!  He literally couldn't tell me anything and had forgotten the invitation at home. 


    Frustrating, but we figured it out. And I learned my lesson...sometimes, even when I think it seems micromanag-y, I still need to follow up the FI about stuff.

    Edit: Spelling mistake!
    Knottie0021480
  • The only thing I hate about group texts is that people don't know how to respond to just the person who sent the text. Then I get a whole bunch of one worded texts about excitement and whatever and it gets annoying because it blows my phone up. 

    Besides that, I guess it's nice just as a reminder though I am normally very careful about remember where everything is and doing my research before hand so I'm not late or showing up at the wrong place.
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    Knottie0021480 huskypuppy14
  • ChemFanatic25 that is one thing I absolutely hate about texting. omg.

  • Sounds like this would be something to post on your wedding website. Less to worry about on the big day, and a lot less hassle.
    Knottie0021480
  • I chose "I don't know" because while I wouldn't be outraged, the whole thing is just weird- unless it is an actual emergency or something that changes the plan for the day.

    The address is on the invitation. It is up to the guest to get directions and know where to go.

    "Don't park in front of the church"- my first response to this was, "No duh!" but just like anywhere else, a guest should follow parking signs and know where to park. If one needs to save a spot for the B/G car, then put pylons in that space.

    A guest should discover their table number at the reception. Even if you text it beforehand, who is going to remember? You'll need your display anyway, or you'll have guests all pulling out there phones to find the text again. Most people complain about the use of phones at weddings, right? 

    Also, on the day of, the B&G should not be spending the amount of time it would take to text everyone! You will be busy and it's not your responsibility on the day of. 

    Wedding websites can do wonders for sharing information. No, not everyone will use it, but it's there (say someone forgets the address- they can use their phone to look up the website).
    Knottie0021480 badbnagdway
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