Inviting cousin's druggy boyfriend...

velvethelicopters

I apologize for not responding sooner. This is pretty hard on me. But I'll try to explain.

With my kids - I adopted via a very well regulated agency. I'm not done with my caseworker for 5 years post adoption. That's why I worked with them. If I know someone is a drug addict, then willing expose my girls to that person, I have an unacceptable to me risk of losing my girls via child endangerment charges. So I am over protective. My girls have had enough trauma, I won't add forced abandonment to that.

Yes, I know that plenty of addicts are hiding their addiction. But, my mind can't go to anything beyond the child endangerment. I have to do what I can to protect my girls. Unknowns keep me up at night.

But my bias started with the early days of losing my family. The summer I had knee surgery (17 at the time), my college age brother came home. He didn't try to hide his addictions, but that was fine to our BSC parents, after all, he was the oldest son, thus perfect.

I had strong opioid pain control. I was stupid as fuck, when I went to PT, I locked my drugs up in two lock boxes, one which I had screwed to the floor, then locked my room with the door lock, then with a hasp and keyed padlock. When I got home, brother had broken all the locks and taken every single pill I had. I called 911. He barely survived. Got out of the hospital and promptly used a massive dose of heroin. I didn't get home in time.

On the first, I wasn't supposed to call the paramedics. On the second, I killed him by not being home. I left home, once or twice a year contact until I adopted and realized I needed to stop playing door mat. I now have no family.

So, I can't bring myself to tolerate drug abuse. It destroyed my family.

[Deleted User]