Community› Wedding Discussion Boards› Not Engaged Yet
Not Engaged Yet
New Discussion
Options

N00b! Hi!

135

Re: N00b! Hi!

  • Options
    anythinggoldanythinggold member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    AudgiePodge: Eh, the new season of Fringe starts up in September so we'll probably have long stopped by then!  Breaking Bad has already taken some of the edge off. 

    Lunar: have you been able to "turn back the clock" on that?
    *** LilySlim Weight loss tickers
    Report Reply
  • Options
    anythinggoldanythinggold member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Oceana: Oh pleeeeeease don't think I meant I was thinking/saying that! 
    *** LilySlim Weight loss tickers
    Report Reply
  • Options
    lunarsongbirdlunarsongbird member
    First Anniversary Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_n00b-hi?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:85240aa6-c229-4ef0-9a3c-948d21aaa2b2Post:36191982-970c-4f00-b1e1-0b1294b43487">Re: N00b! Hi!</a>:
    [QUOTE]AudgiePodge: Eh, the new season of Fringe starts up in September so we'll probably have long stopped by then!  Breaking Bad has already taken some of the edge off.  <strong>Lunar: have you been able to "turn back the clock" on that?</strong>
    Posted by anythinggold[/QUOTE]

    Yup- enough time has passed that now we are just in this warm and fuzzy stage before the engagement.

    We are both totally excited to go and look at the mock-up of our ring tomorrow.

    I've also found that a lot of guys are only able to totally focus on one thing at a time...so right now, I think he wants to be more focused on the proposal then the wedding, which is quite a ways away.
    LilySlim Weight loss tickers
    Report Reply
  • Options
    Elle1036Elle1036 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    Gold - Do you like Harry Potter?  You can win over #2 by answering this simple question correctly.
    Report Reply
  • Options
    AnneR15AnneR15
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_n00b-hi?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:85240aa6-c229-4ef0-9a3c-948d21aaa2b2Post:b6f5df9b-ca13-4121-abfc-350c436d98ff">Re: N00b! Hi!</a>:
    [QUOTE]Jeter: Haha, whew! 1 won over, 1000 more to go :-P We actually had the conversation about the surprise accidentally being ruined. He let it slip that he had been looking at rings and then the surprise went downhill from there. The reason we're not considering ourselves engaged is because even though we know we're getting married, we want to salvage whatever can be left of a surprise, <strong>even if that means waiting a while until I magically forget!
    </strong>Posted by anythinggold[/QUOTE]

    Okay, how are you going to forget if y'all are talking about it all the time? Magic really would be the only way. Just sayin'.

    I think some of the other posters have hit it dead on. You don't need the internet to validate your actions. If you and your BF want to look at wedding stuff, you're going to look at wedding stuff. I think most of us are just trying to encourage you to not bring that talk onto this board. A lot of ladies (I was definitely one of them) came here to get wedding/engagement thoughts out of their heads, and it doesn't help to have someone who's not engaged yet bringing it up a lot - it feeds the BSC.

    Okay, I'm done.

    How do you feel about potatoes? Pasta? Wine?
    PhotobucketWedding Countdown Ticker
    Report Reply
  • Options
    anythinggoldanythinggold member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Elle: Unfortunately, I may get it wrong -- I could never get in to fantasy. I'm getting more and more in to Sci-Fi, though! 

    AnneR15: I think that's where I got confused when I started on this board. Although I started so I could stop pestering SO with my wedding stream of consciousness I figured that since everyone here was signing on to the Knot they wouldn't be averse to wedding talk. I'm still kind of confused about that, but at least I know to keep my big mouth shut!  

    Potatoes, pasta and wine are why I'm losing weight!  SO is a vegetarian, so we got chunky on pasta, potatoes and cheese before we realized that our metabolism had slipped!  I live in VA near a blossoming wine country, so I have a lot of fun with that!!  
    Favorite pasta or potato dish?
    *** LilySlim Weight loss tickers
    Report Reply
  • Options
    anythinggoldanythinggold member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Lunar: are you able to look at rings together and still make the proposal itself a surprise? The surprise aspect completely crumbled when he let it slip that he was ring-shopping! 
    *** LilySlim Weight loss tickers
    Report Reply
  • Options
    lunarsongbirdlunarsongbird member
    First Anniversary Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_n00b-hi?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:85240aa6-c229-4ef0-9a3c-948d21aaa2b2Post:a9cf8aa7-fd26-4d8b-b2ee-0b6dd70f2cce">Re: N00b! Hi!</a>:
    [QUOTE]Lunar: are you able to look at rings together and still make the proposal itself a surprise? The surprise aspect completely crumbled when he let it slip that he was ring-shopping! 
    Posted by anythinggold[/QUOTE]

    Sure thing- because I have no idea <em>when </em>he is going to propose...or <em>how</em>...or <em>where</em>. All I know is why....and that's because he loves me.

    And I'll know that I'm going to like the ring in his hand- which is also good. We are taking his grandmother's and my grandmother's diamonds and making them into a ring.
    LilySlim Weight loss tickers
    Report Reply
  • Options
    desertsundesertsun member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    First, I love that you used my "Seriously?!" face, Audge. I literally LOL'd when I saw it.

    Next, Hi, Gold! Everyone here understands what it's like to be in a committed, happy relationship and have exciting talks about "At our wedding..." No one here is saying you can't have the occasional short conversation related to your someday wedding.

    What we ARE telling you, b/c we HAVE been where you are, is that wedding planning GETS OLD. Seriously. You WILL get tired of it. It's truly best to save your excitement and energy for when you really need it -- AFTER you get engaged.

    I think what other posters find frustrating (myself included) is when new posters disregard our advice.

    The experience of the vast majority of knotties is that wedding planning ceases to be fun at some point.

    You are not a special snowflake. You are not the exception that will prove the rule.

    We are seriously looking out for you when we tell you you will be much happier in the long run if you stop looking at wedding related stuffs now, and just focus on your relationship and enjoying your life together AS it happens instead of living in anticipation of some future moment. It is much more fulfilling to do it our way. Promise.

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker


    Report Reply
  • Options
    anythinggoldanythinggold member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    yaga: I read about her!  Eek!  That's how I felt but somehow this thread got me all confused!  SO was hoping that the whole thing would be a surprise. I do want him to pick out the ring himself, but with guidance from me -- hopefully we're going to look this weekend. 

    Lunar: That's awesome, I was really hoping to do that with SO but it doesn't look like it will work out, so now I've embraced the fact that even though it will be much smaller the diamond I'll have will make me think of him and only him when I look at it.  
    *** LilySlim Weight loss tickers
    Report Reply
  • Options
    NurseyKNurseyK
    Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_n00b-hi?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:85240aa6-c229-4ef0-9a3c-948d21aaa2b2Post:ba29e7f6-c06a-4836-9e50-b231f564afb5">Re: N00b! Hi!</a>:
    [QUOTE]Here's the thing: it isn't us being rude and just going "stop planning, you suck". There really are reasons why you shouldn't start planning before you're engaged. If you're engaged without a ring- great! But your "proposed wedding date" is SO far off, that even if you were engaged there really wouldn't be much for you to plan. <strong>As some of the married and engaged girls have shared, wedding planning gets to be exhausting after a while</strong>. The main point is to focus on the PRESENT, and not the future. Regardless of whether you two are on the same page or not. There's no reason to start looking around and doing comparison shopping now. I thought the sticky made that fairly clear. If you jump in with "Hey I'm not engaged, but it's joint planning and I'm a planner anyways so it's all good!" This is exactly what you're going to end up with.
    Posted by heyimbren[/QUOTE]

    truestory.
    www.nurseyk.weebly.com
    Report Reply
  • Options
    lunarsongbirdlunarsongbird member
    First Anniversary Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_n00b-hi?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:85240aa6-c229-4ef0-9a3c-948d21aaa2b2Post:ff3873a2-78d0-43b8-ae43-1a511b563f02">Re: N00b! Hi!</a>:
    [QUOTE]yaga: I read about her!  Eek!  That's how I felt but somehow this thread got me all confused!  SO was hoping that the whole thing would be a surprise. I do want him to pick out the ring himself, but with guidance from me -- hopefully we're going to look this weekend.  Lunar: That's awesome, I was really hoping to do that with SO but it doesn't look like it will work out, so now <strong>I've embraced the fact that even though it will be much smaller the diamond I'll have will make me think of him and only him when I look at it.  </strong>
    Posted by anythinggold[/QUOTE]

    True, true! My center stone is actually only going to be 0.3 carats. I don't really care much about size though. It's the meaning behind it.

    <a href="#" title="Click to view a larger photo" onclick="return gSiteLife.LoadForumPage('ForumImage', 'plckPhotoId', '1fc03f71-c0d3-41bf-8cfe-3b006aa6372a', 'plckRedirectUrl', gSiteLife.EscapeValue(window.location.href));"> <img src="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/images/store/15/12/1fc03f71-c0d3-41bf-8cfe-3b006aa6372a.medium.jpg" alt="" /></a>

    I've always loved this lolcat.
    LilySlim Weight loss tickers
    Report Reply
  • Options
    alanna91alanna91 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Hey N00bcake/sauce/nub/newb. If you and BF have settled on a date you want to get married at, that's being engaged. You've made an agreement not only when to get married but what month and year. And of course, I'm assuming the agreement is mutual! Getting a ring isn't going to make it any more "official"! Thats my opinion, atleast! :)
    Sorry if it's already been said, but pages 2 and three won't load for some reason />:(

    Also, welcome!
    White Knot
    Report Reply
  • Options
    anythinggoldanythinggold member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    lunar: too cute! Also .3 carats is still great -- I have tiny dainty hands that would fall over if I had much more!  

    That lolcat is perfect because I've spent the past month saying the same thing about another couple who has the snowflake syndrome. The only difference is that i ARE a special snowflake.  Kidding!  I do think that my situation deserves more facts that "omg you said planning we hate you rawr" :-)
    *** LilySlim Weight loss tickers
    Report Reply
  • Options
    Jeter1028Jeter1028 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_n00b-hi?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:85240aa6-c229-4ef0-9a3c-948d21aaa2b2Post:4b99b564-6189-4311-8e8e-c62d244921fe">Re: N00b! Hi!</a>:
    [QUOTE]<strong>Elle: Unfortunately, I may get it wrong -- I could never get in to fantasy. I'm getting more and more in to Sci-Fi, though!</strong>  AnneR15: I think that's where I got confused when I started on this board. Although I started so I could stop pestering SO with my wedding stream of consciousness I figured that since everyone here was signing on to the Knot they wouldn't be averse to wedding talk. I'm still kind of confused about that, but at least I know to keep my big mouth shut!   Potatoes, pasta and wine are why I'm losing weight!  SO is a vegetarian, so we got chunky on pasta, potatoes and cheese before we realized that our metabolism had slipped!  I live in VA near a blossoming wine country, so I have a lot of fun with that!!   Favorite pasta or potato dish?
    Posted by anythinggold[/QUOTE]

    Sometimes it's completely justified to lie.  You should have just said "Yes I <3 Harry Potter!"  LOL
    BabyFruit Ticker
    Report Reply
  • Options
    anythinggoldanythinggold member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    alanna: I know this, is crazy long...

    Although we've settled on a fair number of things and I know we're doing it a little backwards, we still want to have the opportunity to get engaged for realsies, not just fall into it by our accidental wedding planning :-) If the BF wants to have a ring to do that, so be it.  
    *** LilySlim Weight loss tickers
    Report Reply
  • Options
    AnneR15AnneR15
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_n00b-hi?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:85240aa6-c229-4ef0-9a3c-948d21aaa2b2Post:4b99b564-6189-4311-8e8e-c62d244921fe">Re: N00b! Hi!</a>:
    [QUOTE]Elle: Unfortunately, I may get it wrong -- I could never get in to fantasy. I'm getting more and more in to Sci-Fi, though!  AnneR15: I think that's where I got confused when I started on this board. Although I started so I could stop pestering SO with my wedding stream of consciousness I figured that since everyone here was signing on to the Knot they wouldn't be averse to wedding talk. I'm still kind of confused about that, but at least I know to keep my big mouth shut!   Potatoes, pasta and wine are why I'm losing weight!  SO is a vegetarian, so we got chunky on pasta, potatoes and cheese before we realized that our metabolism had slipped!  I live in VA near a blossoming wine country, so I have a lot of fun with that!!   Favorite pasta or potato dish?
    Posted by anythinggold[/QUOTE]

    Well, one of the fun things about this board is that you get to hear about some of the wedding plans of engaged posters. So wedding talk itself isn't banned. A lot of girls on here enjoy weddings, and love to hear about their friend finding her dress or choosing her photogropher - they just steer clear of doing that planning/looking for themselves.

    I love VA wine country - it is so superior to Texas wines. I went to college at UVa, and we made a trip out to one of the nearby vineyards. I'd love to do a more extensive tour next time I visit.

    Hmm, I love plain old mashed potatoes, especially the way my grandma makes them. But scalloped is probably a close second right now. The way I eat them most often is in my breakfast tacos :)  Pasta is harder, because I love pretty much all of it. It's hard to beat good ol' spaghetti and tomato sauce, and my favorite favorite dish is probably a spaghetti bolognese that my cousin's fiance makes - to die for! I've been on a big gnocchi kick lately, too.
    PhotobucketWedding Countdown Ticker
    Report Reply
  • Options
    lunarsongbirdlunarsongbird member
    First Anniversary Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_n00b-hi?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:85240aa6-c229-4ef0-9a3c-948d21aaa2b2Post:b467b182-000d-4868-bb2d-f3f5af75bd2e">Re: N00b! Hi!</a>:
    [QUOTE]lunar: too cute! Also .3 carats is still great -- I have tiny dainty hands that would fall over if I had much more!   That lolcat is perfect because I've spent the past month saying the same thing about another couple who has the snowflake syndrome. The only difference is that i ARE a special snowflake.  Kidding!  I do think that my situation deserves more facts that <strong>"omg you said planning we hate you rawr</strong>" :-)
    Posted by anythinggold[/QUOTE]
    <a href="#" title="Click to view a larger photo" onclick="return gSiteLife.LoadForumPage('ForumImage', 'plckPhotoId', 'a1060bfd-55c7-438d-8834-13b6a1aa5d72', 'plckRedirectUrl', gSiteLife.EscapeValue(window.location.href));">
    </a><a href="#" title="Click to view a larger photo" onclick="return gSiteLife.LoadForumPage('ForumImage', 'plckPhotoId', 'ac1fafd7-326d-44b0-a6bb-bbfa63426a0b', 'plckRedirectUrl', gSiteLife.EscapeValue(window.location.href));"> <img src="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/images/store/12/6/ac1fafd7-326d-44b0-a6bb-bbfa63426a0b.medium.png" alt="" /></a>
    LilySlim Weight loss tickers
    Report Reply
  • Options
    anythinggoldanythinggold member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Anne: good to know.  I'm sure if I misstep I will be promptly put back in line! 

    I'm glad VA wine country has a fan in TX! I'm originally from MD and I'm still trying to get my dad on board...The Southwest is supposedly the next up-and-comer. There was a great documentary on Netflix 'Blood Into Wine" about the guy from Tool's winery. Really interesting stuff. I'm actually planning to go to a few wineries with my mom in a couple of weeks! 

    Special-occasion mashed potatoes are the best. Twice a year, my mom will add cream cheese and sour cream.  
    *** LilySlim Weight loss tickers
    Report Reply
  • Options
    lunarsongbirdlunarsongbird member
    First Anniversary Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Now you must pick out an avatar. Or we will pick one out for you. :) Or you can use the lolcat I made you. Haha.
    LilySlim Weight loss tickers
    Report Reply
  • Options
    anythinggoldanythinggold member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Haha Lunar, I'm totally saving that.  You're my new hero.  And I got over my post-sticky-reading fear after seeing how nice you were in all the threads!! Picking avatar now..
    *** LilySlim Weight loss tickers
    Report Reply
  • Options
    desertsundesertsun member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_n00b-hi?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:85240aa6-c229-4ef0-9a3c-948d21aaa2b2Post:4b99b564-6189-4311-8e8e-c62d244921fe">Re: N00b! Hi!</a>:
    [QUOTE]Elle: Unfortunately, I may get it wrong -- I could never get in to fantasy. I'm getting more and more in to Sci-Fi, though!  AnneR15: I think that's where I got confused when I started on this board. Although I started so I could stop pestering SO with my wedding stream of consciousness <strong>I figured that since everyone here was signing on to the Knot they wouldn't be averse to wedding talk. I'm still kind of confused about that, but at least I know to keep my big mouth shut!   </strong>Potatoes, pasta and wine are why I'm losing weight!  SO is a vegetarian, so we got chunky on pasta, potatoes and cheese before we realized that our metabolism had slipped!  I live in VA near a blossoming wine country, so I have a lot of fun with that!!   Favorite pasta or potato dish?
    Posted by anythinggold[/QUOTE]

    I just want to say...Please don't front. If you're going to be a pre-planner. own it. Own your crazy. I have a lot more respect for people who aren't afraid to go their own way than I do for people who fake it up to fit in.

    Just be yourself!

    Also...I'm a vegetarian, and I hear you on the cheese, potatoes, and pasta! It's easy to eat extra carbs in place of meat! Personally, I find carbs WAY more delicious than meat!  I'm the original mashed potato slut of the board, and I used to have my own special badge that said so. It was a good match for my "mac n cheese, please!" badge. Hee hee hee. :)
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker


    Report Reply
  • Options
    SKP82SKP82 member
    Combo Breaker First Comment First Anniversary
    edited December 2011
    So, I missed all of this while FI and I were going over our rental and catering quotes.  So much fun!!! /sarcasm (well, maybe not just yet)

    OP - there is absolutely NO reason to be planning a wedding when you're not engaged.  ESPECIALLY if said wedding is in Sept 2013.  It does not take that long to plan a wedding.  And, as PPs have already said, wedding planning gets old QUICK!  I have been engaged for a month and I've already experienced some of that.  Plus, what you like now vs. what you will like in 2 years will change.  Just stop and enjoy your relationship as it is right now. 

    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_n00b-hi?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:85240aa6-c229-4ef0-9a3c-948d21aaa2b2Post:954ad81e-fddf-4d00-9476-0dc9790f04a9">Re: N00b! Hi!</a>:
    [QUOTE]Oceana: "Are you engaged" "Yes and no...Yes I'm engaged, no he isn't". I imagine you get that a lot around here :-)
    Posted by anythinggold[/QUOTE]

    WTF does this even mean?  It just makes you even more BSC in my eyes.

    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_n00b-hi?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:85240aa6-c229-4ef0-9a3c-948d21aaa2b2Post:7263fc73-7107-4dfb-9dc3-0dfb5cf2600d">Re: N00b! Hi!</a>:
    [QUOTE]First, I love that you used my "Seriously?!" face, Audge. I literally LOL'd when I saw it. Next, Hi, Gold! Everyone here understands what it's like to be in a committed, happy relationship and have exciting talks about "At our wedding..." No one here is saying you can't have the occasional short conversation related to your someday wedding. What we ARE telling you, b/c we HAVE been where you are, is that wedding planning GETS OLD. Seriously. You WILL get tired of it. It's truly best to save your excitement and energy for when you really need it -- AFTER you get engaged. I think what other posters find frustrating (myself included) is when new posters disregard our advice. The experience of the vast majority of knotties is that wedding planning ceases to be fun at some point. You are not a special snowflake. You are not the exception that will prove the rule. We are seriously looking out for you when we tell you you will be much happier in the long run if you stop looking at wedding related stuffs now, and just focus on your relationship and enjoying your life together AS it happens instead of living in anticipation of some future moment. It is much more fulfilling to do it our way. Promise.
    Posted by desertsun[/QUOTE]

    All of what Desert said, as usual.

    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_n00b-hi?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:85240aa6-c229-4ef0-9a3c-948d21aaa2b2Post:b467b182-000d-4868-bb2d-f3f5af75bd2e">Re: N00b! Hi!</a>:
    [QUOTE]lunar: too cute! Also .3 carats is still great -- I have tiny dainty hands that would fall over if I had much more!   That lolcat is perfect because I've spent the past month saying the same thing about another couple who has the snowflake syndrome. The only difference is that i ARE a special snowflake.  Kidding!  <strong>I do think that my situation deserves more facts that "omg you said planning we hate you rawr" :-)
    </strong>Posted by anythinggold[/QUOTE]

    Everyone thinks their situation is special and deserves an exception.  It doesn't. 

    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_n00b-hi?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:85240aa6-c229-4ef0-9a3c-948d21aaa2b2Post:19954b51-62ae-4ce7-a1f2-b1533ac28d31">Re: N00b! Hi!</a>:
    [QUOTE]alanna: I know this, is crazy long... Although we've settled on a fair number of things and I know we're doing it a little backwards, <strong>we still want to have the opportunity to get engaged for realsies, not just fall into it by our accidental wedding planning</strong>:-) If the BF wants to have a ring to do that, so be it.  
    Posted by anythinggold[/QUOTE]

    If your BF wants to propose, let him do it.  Don't plan beforehand and take away from what that proposal will mean.  If he proposes in a year and you already have your whole damned wedding planned, WTF is the proposal for?  It's just a formality at that point and loses a lot of meaning.

    We are not trying to be mean to you.  We are trying to give you <u>FANTASTIC</u> advice based on lots of experience.  If you chose not to take it, that's your problem.  But don't expect that we will miraculously begin to accept your preplanning craziness, because we won't (or at least, I won't).
    IMG_6364
    "Life is not orderly. No matter how we try to make life so, right in the middle of it we die, lose a leg, fall in love, drop a jar of applesauce." - Natalie Goldberg
    Report Reply
  • Options
    anythinggoldanythinggold member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    SKP: Don't really need acceptance, TBH. I now know not to mention it here lest the "well-intentioned advice" be hurled (some of it I'm sure is, some is really just witchy people being witchy), lesson learned. As for the thing you said makes me BSC, well I thought it was clear I was kidding and in case it wasn't I made it clear that I was. 

    I also said a lot of things that you seem to have skipped (which is pefectly fine given it's a ridiculously long thread, just don't appreciate people showing up at the end to pile on things that have already been said) including it's not real planning and what I'm doing is getting basic pricing down so I know how much to save (which is why the wedding is so far in the future). I obviously don't expect to spend the next 2 years planning for a dinner for 60 people, I just need to have a goal in mind both so I have an incentive to save and I have a dress I can picture when I want a piece of chocolate cake. I know it will be a different dress in 2 years, but it's how I'm rolling now. 

    I had fun on here lurking today during a slow day at work. Some people seem super cool and genuinely sweet. Others are, well, I don't think I'm a special snowflake, but I do think that people need to take time to ask quesitons before making assumptions and jumping. 
    *** LilySlim Weight loss tickers
    Report Reply
  • Options
    thelamarrsthelamarrs
    Name Dropper First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    So I've spent about.... 40 minutes reading this thread. :)

    And of course, I agree with PP but I do really like you so far.

    You haven't run away or deleted your first post, which is a plus in my mind.
    Plus, although I disagree that anyone has been rude (this is no where close), you have been very nice despite the onslaught of disapproving regs. :)

    And I'm like most girls, I came on the knot to do some pre-planning (hence the username), but have fallen even more in love with BF after the wedding talk stopped.

    We picked out my ring and got my finger sized, and until he gives me a ring (which could be tomorrow or two years... probably two years.) I will know nothing at all and I'm comfortable with that.

    My view on pre-planning is the same as most of the ladies. But I know in two years, my taste will change, the economy will be changing no doubt (which will mess with the value of money and who knows what else!) and styles will change. Everything will change, except for the love you feel for your BF. I can't wait for my PPD, but I can't wait even more for the day that I can say he's my HUSBAND, or the day we find out we're expecting our first child (and all of the others!). 

    How do you feel about cookies?

    Oh, and welcome. :)
    image
    ididn't i just say... i dont give a fuuuuuuuuuck?
    My completed crafts pinboard! | Twitter! | My blog (updated 7/10)!
    Report Reply
  • Options
    CASK85CASK85 member
    5 Love Its First Anniversary Name Dropper Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    SKP, I <3 you more and more as time goes by. You always seem to sum up exactly what I'm wanting to sum up. Also Bren had some great points here. And before OP accuses me of not understanding her special situation, let me assure you I've read every inch of this thread. . . and none of your justifications will make the vast majority of us think that what you and BF are doing is totally fine under your circumstances. Just absorb the good advice you got and stop trying to fend everyone off - knowing how to admit you're wrong is a wonderful trait to develop.
    Image and video hosting by TinyPic
    Married Bio
    Anniversary
    Report Reply
  • Options
    SKP82SKP82 member
    Combo Breaker First Comment First Anniversary
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_n00b-hi?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:85240aa6-c229-4ef0-9a3c-948d21aaa2b2Post:73c3b3d5-9526-4b2e-a079-b866a9994295">Re: N00b! Hi!</a>:
    [QUOTE]<strong>SKP, I <3 you more and more as time goes by. You always seem to sum up exactly what I'm wanting to sum up.</strong> Also Bren had some great points here. And before OP accuses me of not understanding her special situation, let me assure you I've read every inch of this thread. . . and none of your justifications will make the vast majority of us think that what you and BF are doing is totally fine under your circumstances. Just absorb the good advice you got and stop trying to fend everyone off - knowing how to admit you're wrong is a wonderful trait to develop.
    Posted by cschiano[/QUOTE]

    Awwwzz.  You don't know how much this means to me. <3

    I, too, read every inch of the thread and agree with Chiano.
    IMG_6364
    "Life is not orderly. No matter how we try to make life so, right in the middle of it we die, lose a leg, fall in love, drop a jar of applesauce." - Natalie Goldberg
    Report Reply
  • Options
    oceana919oceana919
    First Anniversary Name Dropper First Comment
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_n00b-hi?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:85240aa6-c229-4ef0-9a3c-948d21aaa2b2Post:73c3b3d5-9526-4b2e-a079-b866a9994295">Re: N00b! Hi!</a>:
    [QUOTE]SKP, I <3 you more and more as time goes by. You always seem to sum up exactly what I'm wanting to sum up. Also Bren had some great points here. And before OP accuses me of not understanding her special situation, let me assure you I've read every inch of this thread. . . and none of your justifications will make the vast majority of us think that what you and BF are doing is totally fine under your circumstances. Just absorb the good advice you got and stop trying to fend everyone off - knowing how to admit you're wrong is a wonderful trait to develop.
    Posted by cschiano[/QUOTE]

    This. Absolutely this.

    Image and video hosting by TinyPic

    "Oceana swings from logical to anus punching." - Buttons

    Planning / Married / Blog

    Report Reply
  • Options
    anythinggoldanythinggold member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Why are you on a wedding planning site?
    *** LilySlim Weight loss tickers
    Report Reply
  • Options
    oceana919oceana919
    First Anniversary Name Dropper First Comment
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_n00b-hi?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:85240aa6-c229-4ef0-9a3c-948d21aaa2b2Post:f5133c7d-9610-4376-9884-9a13ddf194eb">Re: N00b! Hi!</a>:
    [QUOTE]Why are you on a wedding planning site?
    Posted by anythinggold[/QUOTE]

    Ditto.

    Image and video hosting by TinyPic

    "Oceana swings from logical to anus punching." - Buttons

    Planning / Married / Blog

    Report Reply
This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards