TK confessions?

ricksang

I will!

AllAboutTheBenjamin

I wish I had more poop stories.  I'm in a storytelling mood.

Nebb

All I know is finding someones poop in your yard is NOT pleasant. Not even a little. Setting boobie traps with their poop afterwards on the off chance they come back is the only upside.

lbarr088

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_tk-confessions-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:e82b958c-3afa-4008-b31e-0d9d5f3033f3Post:5cb956f2-ca0c-46a6-b5f4-1f6e15ff1f4a">Re: TK confessions?</a>:
[QUOTE]I wish I had more poop stories.  I'm in a storytelling mood.
Posted by AllAboutTheBenjamin[/QUOTE]

<div>Here's mine:</div><div>
</div><div>FI's grandfather died of cancer right before I met FI.  FI's dad converted part of their house into an apartment for him.  I guess one day his dad was startled because the grandfather started screaming the dad's name.  Dad came running (thinking he fell, or much worse) to find grandpa proudly pointing to a turd in the toilet bowl.  I guess he hadn't pooped in awhile and was proud of the accomplishment.</div><div>
</div><div>Not as cool as your uncle, AATB, but I figured I'd give it a go...</div>

AllAboutTheBenjamin

Omg I cannot imagine finding human poop in my yard.  I get irritated if I find dog shiit, but if I found human shiit, I would probably explode into a fireball of raging rageness.

With that said, I can't help but die at the thought of my uncle pooping in someone's yard.  Can't you just see it - a well dressed man, nice tie, expensive watch - crouched down in the shadows between houses, risking public embarrassment and possibly an indecent exposure arrest, because he literally cannot NOT poop.

AllAboutTheBenjamin

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_tk-confessions-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:e82b958c-3afa-4008-b31e-0d9d5f3033f3Post:92326cb7-c16a-4c16-8c1c-8ecf9bba003e">Re: TK confessions?</a>:
[QUOTE]You know when poop is NOT fun? When your pomeranian gets a poop-butt plug because you were a bad pet owner who didn't get his butt hair shaved off.
Posted by rachers1017[/QUOTE]

I know EXACTLY what you're talking about.  My SIL and BIL have a pomeranian.

lbarr - I think that's hilarious!

celticmyss

Walking around the city I often see piles of poop on the sidewalk and wonder whether it is dog or human. I am convinced a small percentage of it is definitely human but I in no way investigate this theory.

J&K10910

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_tk-confessions-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:e82b958c-3afa-4008-b31e-0d9d5f3033f3Post:95388bb3-5957-45ae-8e59-6d0dae5c3eff">Re: TK confessions?</a>:
[QUOTE]I had to go to a PPD last Memorial Day weekend.  Man that sucked bag of nut sacks.
Posted by AllAboutTheBenjamin[/QUOTE]

I don't get this.  Was someone holding a gun to your head?  If you really didn't want to go that much, why did you go?

(Sorry if this has been addressed, this is as far as I am.)

AllAboutTheBenjamin

Any of you guys watch It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia?  The one about "who pooped the bed."  Fucking shite, that was hilarious.

september's bride

I just got stuck on the longest client call EVER, and I admit the whole time I was listening to him talk, I was wondering about AATB's answer to my Benefiber question.

I think I might try it, just to see how it goes. This pregnancy thing does some weird things to you. Wow.

AllAboutTheBenjamin

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_tk-confessions-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:e82b958c-3afa-4008-b31e-0d9d5f3033f3Post:3b102348-14ea-4a1b-8a63-761f05861a8d">Re: TK confessions?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: TK confessions? : I don't get this.  Was someone holding a gun to your head?  If you really didn't want to go that much, why did you go? (Sorry if this has been addressed, this is as far as I am.)
Posted by J&K10910[/QUOTE]

Well of course we didn't have to go, but we went because Ben's mom is very good friends with the mother of the bride, so we felt obligated to go and make a weekend trip home out of it.

And maybe this is asshole of me, but I was also pretty damn curious.  The couple is kind of a hot mess, I almost had to see the wedding.  Er, PPD.

lbarr088

J&K, we have moved on to poop-talk, FYI.  

J&K10910

Fair enough, AATB.

And I don't do poop talk.

I don't poop either.

lbarr088

MandK9

Lol. "Some animals poop and pay no attention."  Those animals are so apathetic.

KarleeKrause35

Ugh, the other morning I woke up so thrilled because Nelson slept for 10 hours. I practically skipped down the hall. I went to wake him up, and could hear him snoring, which was cute until I noticed that he had gotten diarrhea in the middle of the night, and didn't bark at all, so he slept in it.

I don't know how he did it, but he got it EVERYWHERE. He has huge, fluffy husky fur and he even got it in the fur on his face. I was just amazed because usually if he has to go, he whines and I go let him out. Or, if he has an accident, he wails blue bloody murder. Trying to wash the shiit off of him was not an experience I want to participate again.

AllAboutTheBenjamin

My dog will poop on purpose out of spite sometimes.  If we go away for a weekend and she's at the kennel for a couple days, it doesn't matter how long we play with her outside.  She'll wait until we go inside, on the carpet.  Then she'll poop.  And she'll look at us like, "That'll teach you.  Hos."

lbarr088

Ly has long hair and sometimes if it works out just right the poop gets stuck in her fur, and the poor thing keeps hunching thinking it's not quite all out yet.  Then I have to take the poop baggie and try and get it off her and she runs in circles around me (because the plastic noise from the bag freaks her out) and it looks like I'm trying to beat my dog.  Awesome.

avsfan33

My dog is horrible for pooping. Turn the vacuum on - he poops. Use the drill - he poops. Basically any loud noise, he poops. He literally gets the shiit scared out of him. He gets excited - he poops. Stand outside waiting 20 minutes for him to poop? Nothing. Start going on a walk - he poops. And it's always in front of people.

He also can't stand still and poop, he has to walk in circles and poop.

AllAboutTheBenjamin

I hate that Rach!!  Lucy did that one time on our loveseat.  She jumped on it and pissed.  No warning, no hesitation.  WTF.

Nebb

Vin does this thing where he wiggles his leg around in a circular motion when he poops, we think hes trying to grind it out or something.

 

Also, why is there an APPLE on the everybody poops book - do apples poop?!

J&K10910

Ok, my TK confession is I'm a huge poop prude, and poop conversations weird me out.

KarleeKrause35

I've never had a dog pee on me before, but I had a friend who had a dog that literally peed every time someone came over. It wasn't even like, a dribble. A full on piss.

She took him to a lot of vets and they all said that he was just overly excitable. It would have driven me batshiit.

lbarr088

Eating healthy food (apples) makes you poop! I know they have some fiber... otherwise I don't understand the significance.  

Nebb

but pooping is awesome J!

lbarr088

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_tk-confessions-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:e82b958c-3afa-4008-b31e-0d9d5f3033f3Post:590554f0-d7e9-47f6-94da-c3e34e6f7306">Re: TK confessions?</a>:
[QUOTE]I've never had a dog pee on me before, but I had a friend who had a dog that literally peed every time someone came over. It wasn't even like, a dribble. A full on piss. She took him to a lot of vets and they all said that he was just overly excitable. It would have driven me batshiit.
Posted by KarleeKrause35[/QUOTE]

<div>Ly peed on me while I was clipping her nails.  She was fighting it and I had it so she was belly up and pee shot up at my face.  Fcuk you dog.</div>

Nebb

I babysat some friends kids who had all sorts of rat pets, one was like a chinchilla looking thing. It was crawling all over me and being all cute, climbed up in my hair and pissed on me. I was not impressed and it smelled atrocious.

KarleeKrause35

OMG Ibarr- I wouldn't know whether to laugh or throw up.

Rach, how often does he do it? Like, just when there's visitors?

KarleeKrause35

I miss my family dog so much. He's like, the most dosile dog I've ever seen. He's fully content to just lay with you for hours. But he's got the weakest stomach ever. He once vomited all over my chest while he was laying on top of me sleeping.

ETA: Jesus, Nebb. That would be nasty! When rats pee, is it a lot? (Not that it's relevant, I'm just trying to put the pieces together for this horrible mental image.)

avsfan33

Butters only pees when he's excited sometimes and only certain people. My mom he pees for when he sees her (if it's been awhile). FMIL not so much.