koopa - that doesn't sound familiar, but it's sadly believable with some of the shiit that gets posted on here.
lp and lvb - I remember both of those.
lp - my sil asked if i felt anything yet...I'm still so early so I really don't know. She's had 3 kids so she's pretty used to it, lol. That's so awesome that he kicked! Do you feel like you have an alien inside you?
sarah - we only invited family kids, so my close friend's 1 year old didn't come. If she had told me that she needed to bring her, I would have of course said yes. She wasn't able to bf (and was really upset about it), but pumps religiously. She brought her pump and asked me if she could use the bridal suite during the reception and I of course said yes!
And, the little ones had a great time at our reception! Where else can they run around and be noisy and no one cares because the music is so loud?
BFP(1) DD1 born 4.17.10 @ 33w5d due to pPROM
BFP(4) DD2 born 2.14.13 @ 35w5d due to pPROM
Personally, as the center picture of my wedding program, I am featuring the Gerber baby with a huge "NO!!" stamped across.
Seriously, I get that people don't want the reverance of the ceremony to be disrupted by a child screaming. But oh well. FI and I are probably the last of our friends to get married, thus if our friends come, they will have their children. I would feel terrible to inconvenience them so much as to make them all figure out what to do with their children. At the very least, I'll have an area designated for people who need to step out if their child is fussy. Just my opinion.
sucrets, I started to feel movement around 17/18 weeks or so I think. It kind of feel like gas at first, so who knows when the movement actually started . The kicking takes some getting used to, what's really freaky is when you can start to see the baby kick.
lp - sil told me that she went with the theory that if it was gas, it passed. If it didn't, it was baby. lol. I thought I felt a flutter the other night when I was laying down for bed, but I just can't be sure.
Oh god, is it like that creepy pic that's on the internet with the foot totally poking through the belly?? I don't know if I could handle that, lol. It still seems so foreign to me that this is all happening because all I feel is FAT.
BFP(1) DD1 born 4.17.10 @ 33w5d due to pPROM
BFP(4) DD2 born 2.14.13 @ 35w5d due to pPROM
I'm late to this tonight, but lpstl, ITA about the thread below being bizarro world. I thought it was so weird that you were the lone voice of dissent on an issue I've seen people flamed to hell and back for on here. I said something, but then it just seemed futile to debate it. Larissa was pretty adamant about her beliefs and was pretty harsh. Lots of caps.
I'm no child lover either, but I can't draw the line at nursing infants. It's not even all about feeding, but not wanting to be separated from your infant. I know my sister absolutely refused to leave my nephew for any more than 30 minutes (and only with her husband) so she could go to the store, and she still felt anxious doing that. This was for the first 3 months.
Anyway, that's old news. I'm so excited for your babeeeees! Seriously.
Taco cat: Always a palindrome. ALWAYS, okay J&K?
"cool......insult my size 2 body or my natural brown hair...or the fact that my parents own a country club, I have no budget for a wedding, and I have horses. I really dont care. Its better then having roots." ~ futurepivko
Yeah, it didn't reflect the typical values of most people on here, just went on and on. I wasn't going to touch that one.
Taco cat: Always a palindrome. ALWAYS, okay J&K?
"cool......insult my size 2 body or my natural brown hair...or the fact that my parents own a country club, I have no budget for a wedding, and I have horses. I really dont care. Its better then having roots." ~ futurepivko
In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_kids-question?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:9aad5a0f-a837-45dd-af5b-8fa88a841b40Post:e072f714-8dc6-4e5b-b58f-39e93efd362a">Re: No kids question</a>: [QUOTE]Ohhhh, you felt a flutter??! Fluttering sounds more babylike and less gaslike to me. I bet it's the baby saying hi :) Hehe, no no. Not a foot, but I'll look down and see my belly bounce on one side or little area when he kicks hard. Posted by lpstl[/QUOTE]
I think it was a flutter. Maybe. I was laying on my back and really focusing on what I felt. It actually surprised me a little bit.
That's funny to see it move! It still creeps me out a bit.
Okay, I made my lunch for tomorrow. Bedtime for reals. Night!
BFP(1) DD1 born 4.17.10 @ 33w5d due to pPROM
BFP(4) DD2 born 2.14.13 @ 35w5d due to pPROM
In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_kids-question?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:9aad5a0f-a837-45dd-af5b-8fa88a841b40Post:055a277f-ce06-4020-8fea-ac6ae88e71e7">Re: No kids question</a>: [QUOTE] I would feel terrible to inconvenience them so much as to make them all figure out what to do with their children. Posted by AlannaF[/QUOTE]
ew, seriously? you would feel terrible letting parents figure out what to do with their kids?
Where do you draw the line?.. I'm one of 20 grandkids. (actually 24, but I do not count the 4 from my dad's side)... The oldest was having kids 2 years after the youngest (my brothers) were born. We draw the lline at a certain category.. You do not have to like it... it's okay. But we say first cousins only are invited. If you are the youngest of the 24 and everyone is married or has a SO that means you have to invite 40 people to you wedding.
Fair or not, we are not one to include infants. But as I've said earlier, our family is known to either decline the invite or not. Either way it is not an issue. And nobody holds a grudge It is what it is and there is always another event to attend..
What differentiates an average host and a great host is anticipating unexpressed needs and wants of their guests. Just because the want/need is not expressed, doesn't mean it wouldn't be appreciated.
In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_kids-question?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:9aad5a0f-a837-45dd-af5b-8fa88a841b40Post:fad135c8-4dde-4a8a-9f79-18285a5c04d9">Re: No kids question</a>: [QUOTE]Oh yeah, it was the stupidity of the mother, but it still ruined that wedding. I have nothing against infants. It's stupid mothers who can't figure out that 200+ people glaring at them means get thefuck out of the room with your little banshee that I can't stand. Posted by BecW2be[/QUOTE] This right here.<div> </div><div>I don't give a flying fukc about attention. If I'm in the big white dress, it's likely that I'm getting a good share of attention that day. And at my own wedding, I was too busy eating and dancing to notice whether anyone was actually looking in my direction. Who cares?</div><div> </div><div>It's about the noise and disruption, and no, I never blame the kid. Kids are fine. I blame the idiot parents for not properly overseeing their children. But they don't have to properly oversee a kid if the kid simply isn't there.</div><div> </div><div>And then there's the fairness issue: If I say no kids, and then say, well... except THAT kid, I think that's bullsh!t and unfair to the other parents who attended.</div><div> </div><div>And very simply, it's my freaking choice to make and I don't *have to* make exceptions.</div>
In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_kids-question?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:9aad5a0f-a837-45dd-af5b-8fa88a841b40Post:63656110-7af4-4020-aaa2-25ca7fbaec85">Re: No kids question</a>: [QUOTE]If it's the crying thing, then I think it's kind of insulting to the parent to say "no babies" because it basically tells them that they suck at parenting. Posted by sucrets4[/QUOTE] From what I've seen, most do.
To me it's not about the kid, attention or anything...
Where do I draw the line? I have cousins who BF until 4 years old... They are BF'ing, they should be able to have their kid there, right?
Wait... I have another cousin does not BF her 2 month old? BF issues. Should she not be given an option b/c she is not BF'ing, Right?
Then I have 3,4, 10, 12 month old BF'ers... Who is allowed to bring their BF'ng kids and who is not? It it fair to allow the BF'er and not the non-BF'ers even thought they are the same age??
I admit my familly is unusually large and crosses many generations... But my point is life is not that simple and sometimes you just have to make a choice and stick to it..
What differentiates an average host and a great host is anticipating unexpressed needs and wants of their guests. Just because the want/need is not expressed, doesn't mean it wouldn't be appreciated.
In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_kids-question?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:9aad5a0f-a837-45dd-af5b-8fa88a841b40Post:747f42c5-9997-433a-8845-1868423d4ed9">Re: No kids question</a>: [QUOTE]To me it's not about the kid, attention or anything... Where do I draw the line? I have cousins who BF until 4 years old... They are BF'ing, they should be able to have their kid there, right? Wait... I have another cousin does not BF her 2 month old? BF issues. Should she not be given an option b/c she is not BF'ing, Right? Then I have 3,4, 10, 12 month old BF'ers... Who is allowed to bring their BF'ng kids and who is not? It it fair to allow the BF'er and not the non-BF'ers even thought they are the same age?? I admit my familly is unusually large and crosses many generations... But my point is life is not that simple and sometimes you just have to make a choice and stick to it.. Posted by lyndausvi[/QUOTE] And right here, we see the fairness issue in play. There you go.<div> </div><div>Oh, and back to the "stealing thunder" and "too cute" crap - most infants are actually NOT cute, so I'm really, really not worried about that. KIDS can be cute. Babies, not so much.</div><div> </div><div>At any rate, I definitely hate older kids at a wedding. They're always dashing around the dance floor and I feel like I have to be careful dancing or I'll step on them. I don't like to be careful when I'm dancing, I like to have fun. They're like my cats... only I don't bring my cats to weddings.</div><div> </div><div>And one last point, based on responses in this thread - yes, a wedding is a celebration of love and family... and "love" and "family" do not require more than TWO people to exist. My husband and I *are* a family. No kids required for that.</div><div> </div><div>Oh... one very last thing. Someone said they could see not wanting kids at a wedding, but SAYING it makes the person look bad. I think saying it makes the person look HONEST. I have no problem saying what I think, pretty much ever. At least you know I'll never bullshit you.</div>
But not to the point where the rest of of the world needs to conform to my choice. If in the event I get pregnant I will BF. But I will not get mad or judge someone who does not invite my child to an event when there might be another thousand other reasons why kids are not invited.
I choose to have a baby, that comes with sacrifices. Depending on the parents, it only means 6-12 months of missing events. some parents only EBF for a few months.. No big deal. Others do it longer,..... again no big deal it's their choice.. But that does mean choices come with negative consquences. And that is okay.. There are a ton of other reasons why people can not attend.. One excuse is better than another..
What differentiates an average host and a great host is anticipating unexpressed needs and wants of their guests. Just because the want/need is not expressed, doesn't mean it wouldn't be appreciated.
I posted down below and stated that I saw the point that Larissa was making. I have made a decision not to have children. Period. If I want to have an adults only party, why not? If people are going to be loud, drunk, (possibly smoking), I don't think that is a place for a baby (of any age). As I stated, if I had a cocktail party for adults, would said mom bring her baby along? Do I need to be concerned about creating an environment suitable for a baby? How is a reception different?
Additionally, I don't want any screaming or crying during the ceremony. I have seen babies more often than not be allowed to cry through an event. Or the parent takes them to the side, like the sound from the side or back is any less irritating. Tonight we watched a show with a baby crying, we had to fast forward it because, to us, it was almost painful to listen to.
As I stated, I would never have to tell a close friend or family member not to bring a baby to one of my parties. They would know. Nothing is kid friendly. I guess another thing to point out is that only one of my good friends has a child and there are NO young children in my immediate family. Maybe if my sister suddenly opted to have a child (which would be an act of god) my mind would change. However, for now, I am still in the no kids camp.
I don't get married often, but when I do, I do it in Las Vegas.
"Lvharpy could be your AE." - direy25
"smokeybailey is the one shining beacon of light in this steaming turd of a thread." - daffodil_jill
"The almighty smokeybailey has spoken."
- some bitch on the Las Vegas board
:sidles up to larissa: you're my new favorite. also, 3 cheers for lynda and smokey - i agree with everything you ladies have said 1000%. thank goodness there are voices of reason out there!
Re: No kids question
lp and lvb - I remember both of those.
lp - my sil asked if i felt anything yet...I'm still so early so I really don't know. She's had 3 kids so she's pretty used to it, lol. That's so awesome that he kicked! Do you feel like you have an alien inside you?
sarah - we only invited family kids, so my close friend's 1 year old didn't come. If she had told me that she needed to bring her, I would have of course said yes. She wasn't able to bf (and was really upset about it), but pumps religiously. She brought her pump and asked me if she could use the bridal suite during the reception and I of course said yes!
And, the little ones had a great time at our reception! Where else can they run around and be noisy and no one cares because the music is so loud?
BFP(4) DD2 born 2.14.13 @ 35w5d due to pPROM
Personally, as the center picture of my wedding program, I am featuring the Gerber baby with a huge "NO!!" stamped across.
Seriously, I get that people don't want the reverance of the ceremony to be disrupted by a child screaming. But oh well. FI and I are probably the last of our friends to get married, thus if our friends come, they will have their children. I would feel terrible to inconvenience them so much as to make them all figure out what to do with their children. At the very least, I'll have an area designated for people who need to step out if their child is fussy. Just my opinion.
BFP(4) DD2 born 2.14.13 @ 35w5d due to pPROM
Oh god, is it like that creepy pic that's on the internet with the foot totally poking through the belly?? I don't know if I could handle that, lol. It still seems so foreign to me that this is all happening because all I feel is FAT.
BFP(4) DD2 born 2.14.13 @ 35w5d due to pPROM
I'm no child lover either, but I can't draw the line at nursing infants. It's not even all about feeding, but not wanting to be separated from your infant. I know my sister absolutely refused to leave my nephew for any more than 30 minutes (and only with her husband) so she could go to the store, and she still felt anxious doing that. This was for the first 3 months.
Anyway, that's old news. I'm so excited for your babeeeees!
Taco cat: Always a palindrome. ALWAYS, okay J&K?
"cool......insult my size 2 body or my natural brown hair...or the fact that my parents own a country club, I have no budget for a wedding, and I have horses. I really dont care. Its better then having roots." ~ futurepivko
Hehe, no no. Not a foot, but I'll look down and see my belly bounce on one side or little area when he kicks hard.
By all means, make it as un-baby friendly as possible, but I think you look bad coming right out and saying it.
Okay, I'm really going to bed now. Stupid school in the morning.
BFP(4) DD2 born 2.14.13 @ 35w5d due to pPROM
Taco cat: Always a palindrome. ALWAYS, okay J&K?
"cool......insult my size 2 body or my natural brown hair...or the fact that my parents own a country club, I have no budget for a wedding, and I have horses. I really dont care. Its better then having roots." ~ futurepivko
infants are the makers of the most ear-splitting sound in existence. do not want at my wedding. get it away from me.
[QUOTE]Ohhhh, you felt a flutter??! Fluttering sounds more babylike and less gaslike to me. I bet it's the baby saying hi :) Hehe, no no. Not a foot, but I'll look down and see my belly bounce on one side or little area when he kicks hard.
Posted by lpstl[/QUOTE]
I think it was a flutter. Maybe. I was laying on my back and really focusing on what I felt. It actually surprised me a little bit.
That's funny to see it move! It still creeps me out a bit.
Okay, I made my lunch for tomorrow. Bedtime for reals. Night!
BFP(4) DD2 born 2.14.13 @ 35w5d due to pPROM
[QUOTE] I would feel terrible to inconvenience them so much as to make them all figure out what to do with their children.
Posted by AlannaF[/QUOTE]
ew, seriously? you would feel terrible letting parents figure out what to do with their kids?
jaw.drop.
Where do you draw the line?.. I'm one of 20 grandkids. (actually 24, but I do not count the 4 from my dad's side)... The oldest was having kids 2 years after the youngest (my brothers) were born. We draw the lline at a certain category.. You do not have to like it... it's okay. But we say first cousins only are invited. If you are the youngest of the 24 and everyone is married or has a SO that means you have to invite 40 people to you wedding.
Fair or not, we are not one to include infants. But as I've said earlier, our family is known to either decline the invite or not. Either way it is not an issue. And nobody holds a grudge It is what it is and there is always another event to attend..
[QUOTE]Oh yeah, it was the stupidity of the mother, but it still ruined that wedding. I have nothing against infants. It's stupid mothers who can't figure out that 200+ people glaring at them means get thefuck out of the room with your little banshee that I can't stand.
Posted by BecW2be[/QUOTE]
This right here.<div>
</div><div>I don't give a flying fukc about attention. If I'm in the big white dress, it's likely that I'm getting a good share of attention that day. And at my own wedding, I was too busy eating and dancing to notice whether anyone was actually looking in my direction. Who cares?</div><div>
</div><div>It's about the noise and disruption, and no, I never blame the kid. Kids are fine. I blame the idiot parents for not properly overseeing their children. But they don't have to properly oversee a kid if the kid simply isn't there.</div><div>
</div><div>And then there's the fairness issue: If I say no kids, and then say, well... except THAT kid, I think that's bullsh!t and unfair to the other parents who attended.</div><div>
</div><div>And very simply, it's my freaking choice to make and I don't *have to* make exceptions.</div>
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[QUOTE]If it's the crying thing, then I think it's kind of insulting to the parent to say "no babies" because it basically tells them that they suck at parenting.
Posted by sucrets4[/QUOTE]
From what I've seen, most do.
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Where do I draw the line? I have cousins who BF until 4 years old... They are BF'ing, they should be able to have their kid there, right?
Wait... I have another cousin does not BF her 2 month old? BF issues. Should she not be given an option b/c she is not BF'ing, Right?
Then I have 3,4, 10, 12 month old BF'ers... Who is allowed to bring their BF'ng kids and who is not? It it fair to allow the BF'er and not the non-BF'ers even thought they are the same age??
I admit my familly is unusually large and crosses many generations... But my point is life is not that simple and sometimes you just have to make a choice and stick to it..
[QUOTE]To me it's not about the kid, attention or anything... Where do I draw the line? I have cousins who BF until 4 years old... They are BF'ing, they should be able to have their kid there, right? Wait... I have another cousin does not BF her 2 month old? BF issues. Should she not be given an option b/c she is not BF'ing, Right? Then I have 3,4, 10, 12 month old BF'ers... Who is allowed to bring their BF'ng kids and who is not? It it fair to allow the BF'er and not the non-BF'ers even thought they are the same age?? I admit my familly is unusually large and crosses many generations... But my point is life is not that simple and sometimes you just have to make a choice and stick to it..
Posted by lyndausvi[/QUOTE]
And right here, we see the fairness issue in play. There you go.<div>
</div><div>Oh, and back to the "stealing thunder" and "too cute" crap - most infants are actually NOT cute, so I'm really, really not worried about that. KIDS can be cute. Babies, not so much.</div><div>
</div><div>At any rate, I definitely hate older kids at a wedding. They're always dashing around the dance floor and I feel like I have to be careful dancing or I'll step on them. I don't like to be careful when I'm dancing, I like to have fun. They're like my cats... only I don't bring my cats to weddings.</div><div>
</div><div>And one last point, based on responses in this thread - yes, a wedding is a celebration of love and family... and "love" and "family" do not require more than TWO people to exist. My husband and I *are* a family. No kids required for that.</div><div>
</div><div>Oh... one very last thing. Someone said they could see not wanting kids at a wedding, but SAYING it makes the person look bad. I think saying it makes the person look HONEST. I have no problem saying what I think, pretty much ever. At least you know I'll never bullshit you.</div>
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But not to the point where the rest of of the world needs to conform to my choice. If in the event I get pregnant I will BF. But I will not get mad or judge someone who does not invite my child to an event when there might be another thousand other reasons why kids are not invited.
I choose to have a baby, that comes with sacrifices. Depending on the parents, it only means 6-12 months of missing events. some parents only EBF for a few months.. No big deal. Others do it longer,..... again no big deal it's their choice.. But that does mean choices come with negative consquences. And that is okay.. There are a ton of other reasons why people can not attend.. One excuse is better than another..
Additionally, I don't want any screaming or crying during the ceremony. I have seen babies more often than not be allowed to cry through an event. Or the parent takes them to the side, like the sound from the side or back is any less irritating. Tonight we watched a show with a baby crying, we had to fast forward it because, to us, it was almost painful to listen to.
As I stated, I would never have to tell a close friend or family member not to bring a baby to one of my parties. They would know. Nothing is kid friendly. I guess another thing to point out is that only one of my good friends has a child and there are NO young children in my immediate family. Maybe if my sister suddenly opted to have a child (which would be an act of god) my mind would change. However, for now, I am still in the no kids camp.
Now with more wedded bliss.
I don't get married often, but when I do, I do it in Las Vegas.
"Lvharpy could be your AE." - direy25
"smokeybailey is the one shining beacon of light in this steaming turd of a thread." - daffodil_jill
"The almighty smokeybailey has spoken." - some bitch on the Las Vegas board