I eloped, but i still want to have a wedding!

prymar08 · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_ceremony-ideas_i-eloped-but-i-still-want-to-have-a-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:10Discussion:8136f908-050e-4841-82f3-fa2a8502b174Post:5f8f3933-10dc-4272-8270-cf3f899de59a">Re: I eloped, but i still want to have a wedding!</a>:
[QUOTE]It's like talking to a wall in here. Some people are so dumb.
Posted by Joy2611[/QUOTE]

And are we all to assume that you are vastly superior because you have perfect grammar and troll the wedding forums looking for insults to throw at others?

AdeleDazeem · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_ceremony-ideas_i-eloped-but-i-still-want-to-have-a-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:10Discussion:8136f908-050e-4841-82f3-fa2a8502b174Post:30605308-0c9e-4f5b-8590-d5c95fe20cbb">Re: I eloped, but i still want to have a wedding!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: I eloped, but i still want to have a wedding! : And are we all to assume that you are vastly superior because you have perfect grammar and troll the wedding forums looking for insults to throw at others?
Posted by prymar08[/QUOTE]

<img src="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/scripts/tinymce/plugins/emotions/images/smiley-cool.gif" border="0" alt="Cool" title="Cool" />

serenity5689 · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_ceremony-ideas_i-eloped-but-i-still-want-to-have-a-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:10Discussion:8136f908-050e-4841-82f3-fa2a8502b174Post:30605308-0c9e-4f5b-8590-d5c95fe20cbb">Re: I eloped, but i still want to have a wedding!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: I eloped, but i still want to have a wedding! : And are we all to assume that you are vastly superior because you have perfect grammar and troll the wedding forums looking for insults to throw at others?
Posted by prymar08[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>Shall I say **5** (for those who don't know, it means HIGH 5!) </div><div>

</div>

GoodLuckBear14 · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_ceremony-ideas_i-eloped-but-i-still-want-to-have-a-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:10Discussion:8136f908-050e-4841-82f3-fa2a8502b174Post:ffcc2b48-7fea-4847-9234-fbc0de39204e">Re: I eloped, but i still want to have a wedding!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: I eloped, but i still want to have a wedding! : Not at all. You have your opinion and I have mine, that's fine. But for people who so strongly believe something, you sure don't have many good logical reasons behind that belief whatsoever. I just wanted to know why it was bad etiquette.
Posted by prymar08[/QUOTE]

Legal fact is not a logical explanation????

I'm going to have to start bringing a glass of wine to my knotting.

GoodLuckBear14 · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_ceremony-ideas_i-eloped-but-i-still-want-to-have-a-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:10Discussion:8136f908-050e-4841-82f3-fa2a8502b174Post:e493d0f7-164b-44c4-9ec0-dce426daa4fd">Re: I eloped, but i still want to have a wedding!</a>:
[QUOTE]There is NO ROOM FOR LOGIC HERE, GLB!
Posted by 1covejack[/QUOTE]

Which do you prefer? Red or White? Because I'm buying the first round here. Maybe if we get drunk enough and stand on our heads some of these posts will start to make sense.

prymar08 · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_ceremony-ideas_i-eloped-but-i-still-want-to-have-a-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:10Discussion:8136f908-050e-4841-82f3-fa2a8502b174Post:b2987283-2d7a-40cf-854c-242e695ad448">Re: I eloped, but i still want to have a wedding!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: I eloped, but i still want to have a wedding! : Legal fact is not a logical explanation???? I'm going to have to start bringing a glass of wine to my knotting.
Posted by GoodLuckBear14[/QUOTE]

<div>What does any of this debate have to do with legal fact? For the hundredth time, OP is not trying to sign two documents with the government. She's not getting "married twice." She got married, and is having her CEREMONY at a later date.
</div><div>
</div><div>Bad etiquette doesn't apply to OP's situation. She couldn't have had friends and family present in the courtroom if she wanted to. A wedding is for family and friends; it would be bad etiquette if she DIDN'T share it with anyone. Did she ask for attention and presents when she signed the contract? Then how the hell can she be acting "self-centered." </div><div>
</div><div>PLENTY of people marry in a courthouse and have their ceremony and reception later. I"ve known quite a few who have done this and none of them regret it. </div><div>
</div><div>
</div>

GoodLuckBear14 · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_ceremony-ideas_i-eloped-but-i-still-want-to-have-a-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:10Discussion:8136f908-050e-4841-82f3-fa2a8502b174Post:a4718db7-c3a2-4b87-a35c-6fc8998c99b0">Re: I eloped, but i still want to have a wedding!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: I eloped, but i still want to have a wedding! : What does any of this debate have to do with legal fact? For the hundredth time, OP is not trying to sign two documents with the government. She's not getting "married twice." She got married, and is having her CEREMONY at a later date. Bad etiquette doesn't apply to OP's situation. She couldn't have had friends and family present in the courtroom if she wanted to. A wedding is for family and friends; it would be bad etiquette if she DIDN'T share it with anyone. Did she ask for attention and presents when she signed the contract? Then how the hell can she be acting "self-centered." PLENTY of people marry in a courthouse and have their ceremony and reception later. I"ve known quite a few who have done this and none of them regret it.
Posted by prymar08[/QUOTE]

In order to have a wedding ceremony, you have to have a marriage license. If you cannot get a marriage license because you are already married, then you cannot have a wedding nor can you call a ceremony a wedding. You would be having a vow renewal.

OP and her FI made their choice as to what kind of wedding they were going to have. I don't care what the circumstances were. At some point, they decided that being married immediately was more important than a PPD. That is fine. It is also part of being a grown up. You don't get a do over here so she needs to put on her big girl panties and accept the decision that OP and her FI made.

prymar08 · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_ceremony-ideas_i-eloped-but-i-still-want-to-have-a-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:10Discussion:8136f908-050e-4841-82f3-fa2a8502b174Post:88afc465-6417-423a-917b-bccf460343b7">Re: I eloped, but i still want to have a wedding!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: I eloped, but i still want to have a wedding! : In order to have a wedding ceremony, you have to have a marriage license. If you cannot get a marriage license because you are already married, then you cannot have a wedding nor can you call a ceremony a wedding. You would be having a vow renewal. OP and her FI made their choice as to what kind of wedding they were going to have. I don't care what the circumstances were. At some point, they decided that being married immediately was more important than a PPD. That is fine. It is also part of being a grown up. You don't get a do over here so she needs to put on her big girl panties and accept the decision that OP and her FI made.
Posted by GoodLuckBear14[/QUOTE]

<div>You don't have to have a marriage license to have a wedding. Lots of people have the ceremony and reception and choose not to sign the marriage license. This is not an uncommon idea. </div><div>
</div><div>There are legal matters, which she's not trying to overstep, and there is no one telling anyone that they can't have a wedding ceremony if they've already signed the papers. </div>

RamonaFlowers · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_ceremony-ideas_i-eloped-but-i-still-want-to-have-a-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:10Discussion:8136f908-050e-4841-82f3-fa2a8502b174Post:e5f94956-2f16-4a56-9175-bcf579caa68f">Re:I eloped, but i still want to have a wedding!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re:I eloped, but i still want to have a wedding!: I'm not holding my breath, but I'm willing to try it. Why not split the difference and go with a nice blush?
Posted by StageManager14[/QUOTE]

Pssh, forget wine. Between this, the "celemony" post and the pot-stirring she's doing on P&I, I'm moving on to tequila. Feel free to join me, but bring extra limes, I'm running low.

GoodLuckBear14 · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_ceremony-ideas_i-eloped-but-i-still-want-to-have-a-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:10Discussion:8136f908-050e-4841-82f3-fa2a8502b174Post:ad04c49d-88bd-45ef-9533-cf7df7fece76">Re:I eloped, but i still want to have a wedding!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re:I eloped, but i still want to have a wedding! : Pssh, forget wine. Between this, the "celemony" post and the pot-stirring she's doing on P&I, I'm moving on to tequila. Feel free to join me, but bring extra limes, I'm running low.
Posted by RamonaFlowers[/QUOTE]

Okay. I'm just bringing all of the alcohol that we have here. Tequila is the one thing we don't have so I'm counting on you to bring that Ramona - along with some new recipes from your vacation :)

RamonaFlowers · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_ceremony-ideas_i-eloped-but-i-still-want-to-have-a-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:10Discussion:8136f908-050e-4841-82f3-fa2a8502b174Post:91989b47-2262-4eac-9a0c-a6f5302fbbb0">Re:I eloped, but i still want to have a wedding!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re:I eloped, but i still want to have a wedding! : Okay. I'm just bringing all of the alcohol that we have here. Tequila is the one thing we don't have so I'm counting on you to bring that Ramona - along with some new recipes from your vacation :)
Posted by GoodLuckBear14[/QUOTE]

Seriously ... I drank things that I don't even know what they were. I would go to the bar and be like "Give me something blue/with vodka/frozen/whatever" and they would just hand me stuff! It was fabulous <img src="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/scripts/tinymce/plugins/emotions/images/smiley-smile.gif" border="0" alt="Smile" title="Smile" />

serenity5689 · May 2012

Really, now that is immature... The whole wine thing.

Lets have this subject dropped, it's getting REALLY REALLY old. U have ur believes, we have ours, that's settled. Not gonna force u to believe same as us, and sertainly not gonna let u force us to believe the same as u.

I am 27 years old, married for 7 years and pregnant with baby number 5. I am planning to have my Vow Renewal Wedding between march to april of 2013. That's my interduction, you dont have to like the way I said it but that's how I said it and it's not gonna change.

((Notice, I DID NOT say I was gonna have a DO OVER WEDDING, I said VOW RENEWAL WEDDING. 2 different things

))

GoodLuckBear14 · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_ceremony-ideas_i-eloped-but-i-still-want-to-have-a-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:10Discussion:8136f908-050e-4841-82f3-fa2a8502b174Post:5c0d4e4b-9883-4121-9246-3e3246a8a232">Re: I eloped, but i still want to have a wedding!</a>:
[QUOTE]Really, now that is immature... The whole wine thing. Lets have this subject dropped, it's getting REALLY REALLY old. U have ur believes, we have ours, that's settled. Not gonna force u to believe same as us, and sertainly not gonna let u force us to believe the same as u. I am 27 years old, married for 7 years and pregnant with baby number 5. I am planning to have my Vow Renewal Wedding between march to april of 2013. That's my interduction, you dont have to like the way I said it but that's how I said it and it's not gonna change. ((Notice, I DID NOT say I was gonna have a DO OVER WEDDING, I said VOW RENEWAL WEDDING. 2 different things ))
Posted by serenity5689[/QUOTE]

In case you haven't noticed, we did drop it. You are the one who keeps bringing it up. Some of us have become friends here over the years and we are joking around with eachother.

prymar08 · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_ceremony-ideas_i-eloped-but-i-still-want-to-have-a-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:10Discussion:8136f908-050e-4841-82f3-fa2a8502b174Post:64f89f30-00a2-4028-abce-a33adcd0a83e">Re:I eloped, but i still want to have a wedding!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re:I eloped, but i still want to have a wedding!: Actually, she could have had her family and friends at the courthouse. I've attended several courthouse weddings. She also could have hired an officiant to come to her house, a park, etc for about the same price as going to the JOP and had her ceremony there with family and friends. The only reason she didn't have guests at her ceremony was because she decided to keep it a secret. But there I go introducing facts again.
Posted by StageManager14[/QUOTE]

<div>Completely missing the point. </div><div>She could not have had her entire family and friends at the courthouse. There are probably a myriad of reasons why she didn't have a more formal marriage ceremony. Who cares anyway? There are no written rules. </div>

GoodLuckBear14 · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_ceremony-ideas_i-eloped-but-i-still-want-to-have-a-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:10Discussion:8136f908-050e-4841-82f3-fa2a8502b174Post:23a57c64-3318-49f7-ab11-8648849d5479">Re:I eloped, but i still want to have a wedding!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re:I eloped, but i still want to have a wedding! : Seriously ... I drank things that I don't even know what they were. I would go to the bar and be like "Give me something blue/with vodka/frozen/whatever" and they would just hand me stuff! It was fabulous
Posted by RamonaFlowers[/QUOTE]

And that is the mark of a kick ass vacation :)

[Deleted User] · May 2012

Have your wedding! the rest of you are horrible! It's up to you and your husband, you two are the only opinion that matters. God bless you both!

[Deleted User] · May 2012

Amen

Alex3Mom · May 2012

Of course, you can do whatever you want, but the purpose of these boards is to discuss what is and what is not in good taste. That is ultimately your question, and the answer is a do over wedding is never in good taste. You can have any kind of party you would like to celebrate your marriage or your anniversary; you just can't call it a wedding (you've already had that) or do wedding things. Once you're married, all of the traditional wedding things (Dad walking you down the aisle, a big white dress, cake cutting, bouquet toss, etc) become show biiz. Instead of people smiling and crying softly, they are mostly giggling at the silly display and tasteless display.

Kristin789 · May 2012

Just wanted to comment on this part:

>>When people elope they often have a party to celebrate with all of their loved ones.

When people elope or have a very small group at the courthouse or whatever, they often invite many, many people to an after-party/reception. But these days few people go to those, because they weren't invited to the actual ceremony - so they know that this "party" is really to collect a lot of really great gifts. So they send a card, and just don't go.

A friend of mine tried this. Got married in a DW far from the home town. And then her parents invited about 200 people to go on a dinner cruise in the hometown. And something like 30 people went. Most of those people were IN the wedding + spouses. Her parents lost a TON of money on this.

You don't want that to happen to you.

Lisa50 · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_ceremony-ideas_i-eloped-but-i-still-want-to-have-a-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:10Discussion:8136f908-050e-4841-82f3-fa2a8502b174Post:f3204369-1428-4420-b335-6e9c80f656f4">Re: I eloped, but i still want to have a wedding!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: I eloped, but i still want to have a wedding! : Careful, your second agenda is hanging out.
Posted by 1covejack[/QUOTE]

Hey there covejack! What's shaking? Long time, no see. I hope you're doing well. OK, back to the circular drama ...

nataliexiomara · July 2012

You can have whatever you want. I think it is so dumb people are judging you because you eloped and still want to have a ceremony and reception. Some people don't want a ceremony and reception but you do and that's important to you so do it. Who cares what everyone else says, at least you aren't divorced trying to get married again, what you are doing is totally fine. It's not a re-do, anyone who says that is snobby and totally close minded. You are simply celebrating what you didn't get to the first time, and personally if you are part of a religion it's not the same getting married in the court house as it is by a minister or other religious official. Do what you want and enjoy your day. The rest of you brides need serious attitude adjustments, she is entitled to a dress just as much as all you other brides are. Seriously, you guys are being rude bridal brats.

essdeebee · July 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_ceremony-ideas_i-eloped-but-i-still-want-to-have-a-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:10Discussion:8136f908-050e-4841-82f3-fa2a8502b174Post:57f1129d-6b2f-4b55-aeb1-25a4f965bb1c">Re: I eloped, but i still want to have a wedding!</a>:
[QUOTE]I wouldn't listen to most of the people on this site, they seem like they spend way too much time on here. Seriously calling people newbies?? How would you know whos a "newbie" unless you stalk these boards day and night. Most of you are married... you move on. Honestly it's your life and YOUR wedding and you should be able to do what you want. If you don't feel good about your couthouse wedding you go out there and do it again. This is a very special day and you should be able to remember it as being perfect! Who cares if these people think it's not proper, I can assure you no one who is invited will think that. I've seen this done many times and I've never heard anyone say anything bad about it. And seriously this site is here for HELP, ADVISE, and SUPPORT not for all this negativity that I am way too used to seeing on these boards.
Posted by JessicaPop[/QUOTE]

I agree. There is negativity everywhere in this community, and it's always from people that are married already. Talk about PPD!
<p class="MsoNormal">I got engaged over a year ago. My fiancé and I planned a wedding (for this Sunday!) and paid for everything. Then, bombshell. Our governor changed state laws on health insurance, and we found out that if we did not get married by a June 22 deadline, I could not waive my benefits and we'd be out $5000. That is the cost of my wedding. You can sure as hell believe we went down to the courthouse THAT day and got married to save $5000. Not doing so would be just plain stupid, and if anyone has enough money to state otherwise, then feel free to share with me.</p><p class="MsoNormal">My friends all thought it was genius, and the other teachers at my school and his that are getting married this summer did the same thing. Another friend got married a week ago so she could afford emergency surgery on her husband's insurance, though her planned wedding will be in August. Should I have given up $5000 and should she have suffered without her surgery because etiquette deemed this inappropriate? Whatever.</p>

I eloped, but i still want to have a wedding!

Re: I eloped, but i still want to have a wedding!

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