FFF

Nebb · March 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_fff-24?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:9bd9d026-06c1-4f5f-b2d1-efa516f01de7Post:cd56567f-4468-44e4-8d20-61ff3e95bfa9">Re: FFF</a>:
[QUOTE]Nuggs, why is okay for people to say you're running on CPT, though? If I'm late, my friends don't blame it on my race. They'd probably just be annoyed. Not chalk it up to a character flaw that's shared by millions of people due to some genes. I remembered my other flame. The girl who posted about her cousin possibly picking the same wedding date based on the Chinese lunar calendar and how to address it. A lot of regulars made fun of her, brimcleod commented, everyone flipped out at her, and the OP got really upset. She actually PMed me and I apologized on behalf of the board. Come on, she was a newb. I know posts get way off topic sometimes,<strong> but she deserved a serious answer to her question</strong>. So I'm not flaming her, I'm flaming the regs who were being ridiculous in that thread.
Posted by msmerymac[/QUOTE]
She DID get quite a few serious answers, from a variety of people.

SarahSmile23 · March 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_fff-24?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:9bd9d026-06c1-4f5f-b2d1-efa516f01de7Post:b72d2791-9b5a-41ea-94b0-a41a218bc816">Re: FFF</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: FFF : Me too! And that girl who said the reason she doens't want this reform is because she wants her husban who is a doctor to make big bucks. riiight.
Posted by kkchisholm[/QUOTE]

this is not what she said. re-read the thread because i think you might have misunderstood. she was pointing out that doctors have very tons of student loans by the time they graduate and that they should deserve to be rewarded financially when they are finally in the workforce. i'm not sure why she was flamed then and i'm not sure why she is being flamed again now. yes, she could have been more gentle in how she stated it, but the fact is that people who spend the time and money to go to med school should be allowed to say that they want to make a profit.

and mery, nobody said that everybody on the planet could be Harvard graduates. it was simply stated that people overcome obstacles every day and we live in a country where just because you are born poor doesn't mean you have to die poor. are you flaming heels for sharing her story and showing how people who have nothing really can be successful if they work hard?

beatlesgirl25 · March 2010

Late to this today, but I flame that chick on Invites and Paper who had her mommy come online and tell us all to LEAVE BRITNEY ALONE!!! Or that pretended that she was her mom telling us to leave her alone. I'm still not sure which option was more lame.

NuggetBrain · March 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_fff-24?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:9bd9d026-06c1-4f5f-b2d1-efa516f01de7Post:cd56567f-4468-44e4-8d20-61ff3e95bfa9">Re: FFF</a>:
[QUOTE]Nuggs, why is okay for people to say you're running on CPT, though? If I'm late, my friends don't blame it on my race. They'd probably just be annoyed. Not chalk it up to a character flaw that's shared by millions of people due to some genes. Posted by msmerymac[/QUOTE]

Because they aren't being serious, and neither am I. That's the difference. CPT is a funny concept, one of those little ironic things. I'm late because I'm late not because I'm black, but since there's a stereotype that black folks are always late, it's kind of a funny irony and that's where the joking about CPT comes in. Which is why, if I was late and Cuban, they might say I'm on Cuban Time. Or Native Time, if I'm late and Native American. It's an inside joke that isn't so inside anymore, if that makes any sense.

For a really funny definition, see the following:

<a href="http://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/Colored_People's_Time">http://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/Colored_People's_Time</a>

andyandhillary · March 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_fff-24?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:9bd9d026-06c1-4f5f-b2d1-efa516f01de7Post:0dcadbb5-7f8d-41f6-9116-370b1ed0f0ae">Re: FFF</a>:
[QUOTE]I flame three things this week: Tide, for complaining the county/city was getting on her to clean up her yard. I don't know the situation, but where I'm from (upstate NY) it takes a LOT for them to warn you to clean your property. As in, they think it is a safety hazard for either fires or infestation. Not just, "there's a bunch of leaves you haven't raked and your grass is 6 inches tall." <strong>AndyandHillary for saying that Walmart Cashiers and McDonald's cooks basicalyl choose their own profession and they ALL could be graduates of Harvard law if they really applied themselves (also from one of the healthcare threads)</strong> And then Lynda, too, like PP said. I had a third one, though. I hope I remember it.
Posted by msmerymac[/QUOTE]

Really? That's not a very good flame. You are flaming me for believing in people?

RachNRich · March 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_fff-24?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:9bd9d026-06c1-4f5f-b2d1-efa516f01de7Post:0dcadbb5-7f8d-41f6-9116-370b1ed0f0ae">Re: FFF</a>:
[QUOTE]I flame three things this week: Tide, for complaining the county/city was getting on her to clean up her yard. I don't know the situation, but where I'm from (upstate NY) it takes a LOT for them to warn you to clean your property. As in, they think it is a safety hazard for either fires or infestation. Not just, "there's a bunch of leaves you haven't raked and your grass is 6 inches tall." <strong>AndyandHillary for saying that Walmart Cashiers and McDonald's cooks basicalyl choose their own profession and they ALL could be graduates of Harvard law if they really applied themselves (also from one of the healthcare threads)</strong> And then Lynda, too, like PP said. I had a third one, though. I hope I remember it.
Posted by msmerymac[/QUOTE]

<div>This. Times a million. </div>

temerityjane · March 2010

SarahSmile - Agreed. It seems as though she was flamed for she and her husband not being 100% altruistic. A very "how dare you say MONEY!" kind of thing. Doctors are paid a shiitton of money because they spent more time and more effort and more money learning more things than the average person knows, AND how to apply them without KILLING SOMEONE. Nowhere did that poster say they wanted to be rich. She said that he husband deserved, as much as anyone else, to make money at his chosen career.

And to act like he got into medicine EXPECTING to be rich - not comfortable, but rich - practicing medicine just for the money - come on. Before I even ENROLLED in college, I looked at the earning potential of my possible career choices. No one goes all the way through med school, residencies, etc and graduates surprised that they're in debt and not making money hand over fist.

A lot of that thread was argued from an emotional standpoint (I have a preexisting condition, my brother was sick, what about me, what about my specific circumstances) rather than logical, and it went all weird.

goheels05 · March 2010

Sarah, she's right, I'm obviously an anomaly.

Actually, people overcame poverty and other obstacles all the time decades ago before our society became so focused on entitlement. I'm sad that so many people subscribe to this notion that not everyone can be successful.

beatlesgirl25 · March 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_fff-24?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:9bd9d026-06c1-4f5f-b2d1-efa516f01de7Post:a24cf103-f8bc-4a70-949e-de419a16dfdc">Re: FFF</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: FFF : Really? That's not a very good flame. You are flaming me for believing in people?
Posted by andyandhillary[/QUOTE]

I didn't read the original thread for this, but to me it <em>sounded</em> like she was flaming your mindset that blames people for being stuck in entry level jobs without consideration for what other socioeconomic factors might be influencing that.

AlexiaANDRobert · March 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_fff-24?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:9bd9d026-06c1-4f5f-b2d1-efa516f01de7Post:2c9c8452-5cc7-4385-bd42-b913c0e24772">Re: FFF</a>:
[QUOTE]I flame anyone who is too thick-headed to understand why doctors are paid well, and anyone who thinks that they are "rich" after paying hundreds of thousands in student loans, 40% to taxes, and who knows how much in malpractice insurance.
Posted by goheels05[/QUOTE]

Agreed.

RachNRich · March 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_fff-24?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:9bd9d026-06c1-4f5f-b2d1-efa516f01de7Post:a24cf103-f8bc-4a70-949e-de419a16dfdc">Re: FFF</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: FFF : Really? That's not a very good flame. You are flaming me for believing in people?
Posted by andyandhillary[/QUOTE]

<div>It has nothing to do with not believing in people. Not. At. All. I believe in people. But? Not everyone can be a doctor. Not everyone can be a lawyer. Not everyone has the same opportunities---that's just the nature of the beast. And in this economy, that women with 4 children that works as a cashier that you bashed? What about her background? What if her husband left her--and she lost her job, and took the only available position she could find? I just don't see the point in bashing someone's career --- we need people to work those jobs. That women cashier is just as important as the guy that picks up the garbage weekly, and the family that runs a ceptic (read: poop drain in your backyard) cleaning business---they are sucky jobs, but someone has to do them---and it doesn't make them bad people. </div>

andyandhillary · March 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_fff-24?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:9bd9d026-06c1-4f5f-b2d1-efa516f01de7Post:7852da9c-0732-4c4f-8a3f-00d2e611dff7">Re: FFF</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: FFF : I didn't read the original thread for this, but to me it sounded like she was flaming your mindset that blames people for being stuck in entry level jobs without consideration what other socioeconomic factors might be influencing that.
Posted by beatlesgirl25[/QUOTE]

Oh no, I get what she was saying. But I'm not looking "down" on these people or judging them. That wasn't the focus of my statement. The focus was to point out that there are always ways to get out of a "bad" place. I know it's not easy and not everyone may have the emotional strength to cope but I still believe it's possible.

Maybe that doesn't clear it up and maybe I people will still dislike me for it, but that's fine.

sweetpea0911 · March 2010

=[ Just an apology for the over excessive posts about FI. No one to talk to hear and didn't know where else to go. I'll stop, promise.

In the meantime, I have no flames. But ya'll picked up on a lot of stuff I missed.

andyandhillary · March 2010

I just genuinely disagree with you guys and you genuinely disagree with me. I don't think anyone is wrong or right, it's an opinion, not a fact. I could come up with tons of heartwarming stories of succeeding against the odds but you'll still disagree.

FWIW, like i said before there's no judgment. My mom cleaned houses for a few years and there is no shame in it. She's also the person who told me to believe what I do.

RachNRich · March 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_fff-24?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:9bd9d026-06c1-4f5f-b2d1-efa516f01de7Post:546dca09-b024-488c-aab4-ad9754b0a2dc">Re: FFF</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: FFF : Oh no, I get what she was saying. But I'm not looking "down" on these people or judging them. That wasn't the focus of my statement. <strong>The focus was to point out that there are always ways to get out of a "bad" place. </strong>I know it's not easy and not everyone may have the emotional strength to cope but I still believe it's possible. Maybe that doesn't clear it up and maybe I people will still dislike me for it, but that's fine.
Posted by andyandhillary[/QUOTE]

<div>I don't think this is necessarily true. Because, and this is probably just my emotions talking, someone is always going to be at the bottom. One person gets to be Valedictorian, ya know? Everyone in school can try as hard as they want---but only one person gets it. That's how I view life---doesn't mean everyone should give up, or shouldn't bother trying---but there are limits. </div>

beatlesgirl25 · March 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_fff-24?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:9bd9d026-06c1-4f5f-b2d1-efa516f01de7Post:ba3db14f-3e4f-4d52-b51e-ade1ab060206">Re: FFF</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: FFF : I don't think this is necessarily true. Because, and this is probably just my emotions talking, someone is always going to be at the bottom. One person gets to be Valedictorian, ya know? Everyone in school can try as hard as they want---but only one person gets it. That's how I view life---doesn't mean everyone should give up, or shouldn't bother trying---but there are limits.
Posted by RachNRich[/QUOTE]

Again, I'm not familiar with the thread you guys are referencing, but I agree with this. I can appreciate Andyandhillary's erm, attitude, about beating the odds and creating a heartwarming story. I'll probably tell my future hypothetical kids that too so they don't grow up too cynical. But realistically these are more exceptions, because it's impossible for the majority of people to be on top.

temerityjane · March 2010

I'm too lazy to go back through the thread to check if this overlap exists, but if it does, I flame those people - Anyone who basically said "it's lame for you to be offended by Raptor Jesus" and then also expressed astonishment that Nebb ISN'T offended by BlameCanada's bio.

Yeah. So if anyone said both of those things, I flame those people, because, come on. It's dumb to be offended if someone makes a joke about Jesus but POUTINE? MY GOD!

andyandhillary · March 2010

Yeah, I see what you're saying rach. I was thinking in more general terms. Like say you want to be a lawyer but you aren't great at those subjects. Well you can try and try again and never be good at it. you could go to a less awesome grad school than others, but you're still a lawyer. You could also keep trying to get into harvard your whole life. It's all about choices, IMO, and I know you disagree but we can do that and still co-exist

kkchisholm · March 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_fff-24?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:9bd9d026-06c1-4f5f-b2d1-efa516f01de7Post:ba3db14f-3e4f-4d52-b51e-ade1ab060206">Re: FFF</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: FFF : I don't think this is necessarily true. Because, and this is probably just my emotions talking, someone is always going to be at the bottom. One person gets to be Valedictorian, ya know? Everyone in school can try as hard as they want---but only one person gets it. That's how I view life---doesn't mean everyone should give up, or shouldn't bother trying---but there are limits.
Posted by RachNRich[/QUOTE]

This<img src="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/scripts/tinymce/plugins/emotions/images/smiley-laughing.gif" border="0" alt="Laughing" title="Laughing" />

Has anyone seen the movie Precious? Are you telling me that baby boy who is born from insest who was given nothing but fatty foods in utero, and has a mother whos is HIV+ has the same opportunities at day 1 as the kid who was born in an upper middle class family? And Precious didn't just eat the fatty foods because she liked them. She ate them because it's what is available, and what is cheap. Dollar menue. In inner cities, especially poor inner cities, Mcdonalds is in walking distance, Wholefoods is not. Same opportunities? I think not.

Now you'll all dissagree... it's okay... I'm use to it. I am a strong beleiver in social justice.

andyandhillary · March 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_fff-24?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:9bd9d026-06c1-4f5f-b2d1-efa516f01de7Post:98df2b21-5198-4f0a-9141-62d0cb783017">Re: FFF</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: FFF : Again, I'm not familiar with the thread you guys are referencing, but I agree with this. I can appreciate Andyandhillary's erm, attitude, about beating the odds and creating a heartwarming story. I'll probably tell my future hypothetical kids that too so they don't grow up too cynical. But realistically these are more exceptions, because it's impossible for the majority of people to be on top.
Posted by beatlesgirl25[/QUOTE]

Why lie to your kids if you don't believe it yourself?

andyandhillary · March 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_fff-24?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:9bd9d026-06c1-4f5f-b2d1-efa516f01de7Post:5716cdc2-a9b9-4ef3-8bb8-af947a305fb4">Re: FFF</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: FFF : This Has anyone seen the movie Precious? Are you telling me that baby boy who is born from insest who was given nothing but fatty foods in utero, and has a mother whos is HIV+ has the same opportunities at day 1 as the kid who was born in an upper middle class family? And Precious didn't just eat the fatty foods because she liked them. She ate them because it's what is available, and what is cheap. Dollar menue. In inner cities, especially poor inner cities, Mcdonalds is in walking distance, Wholefoods is not. Same opportunities? I think not. Now you'll all dissagree... it's okay... I'm use to it. I am a strong beleiver in social justice.
Posted by kkchisholm[/QUOTE]

I'm a strong believer in social justice too. Your previous statements don't really tie into that. I think you can believe in it without having the government involved. Once upon a time, people used to help eachother instead of relying on the government.

beatlesgirl25 · March 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_fff-24?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:9bd9d026-06c1-4f5f-b2d1-efa516f01de7Post:b3e1f62d-2e66-4fc7-b8bb-824c768472c1">Re: FFF</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: FFF : Why lie to your kids if you don't believe it yourself?
Posted by andyandhillary[/QUOTE]

I'm not going to lie to my kids, I said I'm going to impart the spirit of what you were saying onto them. Rather than say, "you can try to be the best at what you do, but odds are you won't be," I'd tell them that they can follow their dreams and succeed at what they do.

I also don't believe that succeeding in life is based on going to college and/or grad school. So if my kids are in a job that makes them happy and fulfilled, regardless of what it is, I'll consider that a success. I think college is a waste of time for many people and sets them up for disappointment in the real world.

goheels05 · March 2010

Also, I don't think we should have such a narrow view of success. Doctors, lawyers, and engineers aren't the only people who are "successful." You can work in fast food and be successful. It's a very subjective word. Like Rach said, in different words, our society needs people who do undesirable jobs--collecting trash, working in chicken plants, etc. But to me, I don't automatically write people in those jobs off as unsuccessful.

RachNRich · March 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_fff-24?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:9bd9d026-06c1-4f5f-b2d1-efa516f01de7Post:62672d1e-4a77-445c-a59f-b11b19ccd2df">Re: FFF</a>:
[QUOTE]Yeah, I see what you're saying rach. I was thinking in more general terms. Like say you want to be a lawyer but you aren't great at those subjects. Well you can try and try again and never be good at it. you could go to a less awesome grad school than others, <strong>but you're still a lawyer</strong>. You could also keep trying to get into harvard your whole life. It's all about choices, IMO, and I know you disagree but we can do that and still co-exist :)
Posted by andyandhillary[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>This is true. That person would still be a lawyer---but, a degree from a top tier law school will produce better outcomes (job placement and whatnot) than a degree, from--let's say, The University of Toledo law school. </div><div>
</div><div>I wish it were all about choices---but, it isn't. Some students with, for instance, dyslexia, might struggle (even with help) to a point that will hold them back---probably something they wouldn't choose. In fact, it's probably something they would choose not to have happen. </div><div>
</div><div>So, with that, we agree to disagree :)</div>

luckyme502 · March 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_fff-24?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:9bd9d026-06c1-4f5f-b2d1-efa516f01de7Post:163ac683-2282-4b18-9f2a-55c5ac9e2bb1">Re: FFF</a>:
[QUOTE]TJ, I am not a Twit, or Tweeter, or the proper noun is in this situation, but I kinda see where that lady is coming from. I wouldn't expect base housing to be wonderful, because it is taxpayer funded. Not an issue of deserving decent housing, but all too often government-funded endeavors (read, funding of schools, paying police and firefighters, etc.) aren't up to what the recipients deserve.
Posted by sarabellam[/QUOTE]

This does not make sense to me. So because often times people's jobs who are government funded don't get what they deserve, they should never get what the deserve? I fail to see the logic in this argument. But, you need not worry, I don't think anyone would call military housing wonderful.

beatlesgirl25 · March 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_fff-24?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:9bd9d026-06c1-4f5f-b2d1-efa516f01de7Post:0dd1247a-eedc-4b6f-b6d2-66856bfdfcc5">Re: FFF</a>:
[QUOTE]Also, I don't think we should have such a narrow view of success. Doctors, lawyers, and engineers aren't the only people who are "successful." You can work in fast food and be successful. It's a very subjective word. Like Rach said, in different words, our society needs people who do undesirable jobs--collecting trash, working in chicken plants, etc. But to me, I don't automatically write people in those jobs off as unsuccessful.
Posted by goheels05[/QUOTE]

Exactly heels. That's what I was trying to say.

RachNRich · March 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_fff-24?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:9bd9d026-06c1-4f5f-b2d1-efa516f01de7Post:0dd1247a-eedc-4b6f-b6d2-66856bfdfcc5">Re: FFF</a>:
[QUOTE]Also, I don't think we should have such a narrow view of success. Doctors, lawyers, and engineers aren't the only people who are "successful." You can work in fast food and be successful. It's a very subjective word. Like Rach said, in different words, our society needs people who do undesirable jobs--collecting trash, working in chicken plants, etc. But to me, I don't automatically write people in those jobs off as unsuccessful.
Posted by goheels05[/QUOTE]

<div>I have a big fat girl crush on you. So big, in fact, that I've decided to move close to you just to feel better about it.</div>

kkchisholm · March 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_fff-24?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:9bd9d026-06c1-4f5f-b2d1-efa516f01de7Post:0dd1247a-eedc-4b6f-b6d2-66856bfdfcc5">Re: FFF</a>:
[QUOTE]Also, I don't think we should have such a narrow view of success. Doctors, lawyers, and engineers aren't the only people who are "successful." You can work in fast food and be successful. It's a very subjective word. Like Rach said, in different words, our society needs people who do undesirable jobs--collecting trash, working in chicken plants, etc. But to me, I don't automatically write people in those jobs off as unsuccessful.
Posted by goheels05[/QUOTE]

I completely agree.

salt78 · March 2010

I don't like Andyandhillary. Not for any reason specifically. I just cringe every time she posts.

goheels05 · March 2010

Well, at least we can agree on that.

FFF

Re: FFF

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