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Wedding Etiquette Forum

Destination Wedding Gift Registry

I have an idea but am not sure if it's good wedding etiquette or not so I'd like to get some more opinions. 
My boyfriend and I are both divorced and have both had our big beautiful weddings. We live together and are financially secure enough that we already have everything we could need as far as wedding gifts would usually go. In fact, since we moved in together we two of mostly everything. We both agree that when we get married we would like to go to a beach vacation and just get married by ourselves. Our families, for the most part, support this and think that if it's what makes us happy then they are happy. My question is, would it be appropriate for us to set up a registry for the vacation as though it were a honeymoon registry even though we are getting married on this vacation? I know that many of our friends and family will want to buy us gifts but like I  said, we really don't need anything. We will be having a party upon our return that we will invite everyone to and celebrate our recent vows. 
So, please give me any opinions that you may have! Thank you!!
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Re: Destination Wedding Gift Registry

  • Honeymoon registries are against etiquette.  If you truly don't need gifts, do not have a registry.  Your family and friends will realize that if they want to give you a gift, they should just give cash, without the rudeness of a HM registry.
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_destination-wedding-gift-registry?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:ba428a69-d080-43fe-9260-5f8cd8230597Post:26b192de-91db-4296-9be9-b0e5083a22cb">Destination Wedding Gift Registry</a>:
    [QUOTE]I have an idea but am not sure if it's good wedding etiquette or not so I'd like to get some more opinions.  My boyfriend and I are both divorced and have both had our big beautiful weddings. We live together and are financially secure enough that we already have everything we could need as far as wedding gifts would usually go. In fact, since we moved in together we two of mostly everything. We both agree that when we get married we would like to go to a beach vacation and just get married by ourselves. Our families, for the most part, support this and think that if it's what makes us happy then they are happy. <strong>My question is, would it be appropriate for us to set up a registry for the vacation as though it were a honeymoon registry even though we are getting married on this vacation?</strong> I know that many of our friends and family will want to buy us gifts but like I  said, we really don't need anything. We will be having a party upon our return that we will invite everyone to and celebrate our recent vows.  So, please give me any opinions that you may have! Thank you!!
    Posted by lkbaird1982[/QUOTE]<div>
    </div><div>No. Pay for your own vacation.

    </div>
  • Seriously? Read the thread 2 down.
  • I think registering (for anything) when you are eloping is rude. 
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  • Honeymoon registries are never appropriate, even if you aren't having a destination wedding. If you don't need anything, just don't register - people will either give you cash or a gift of their choice if they want to give you something. Have fun planning!
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_destination-wedding-gift-registry?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:ba428a69-d080-43fe-9260-5f8cd8230597Post:123e7549-51af-4308-85c4-fe2d269c21e5">Re: Destination Wedding Gift Registry</a>:
    [QUOTE]I think registering (for anything) when you are eloping is rude. 
    Posted by Habs2Hart[/QUOTE]

    I agree.  Also, why do people always assume their friends will want to buy them a gift?  I'll be honest, I don't usually think about gifts unless I'm invited to the wedding.  My first thought is to congratulate the couple, but not necessarily to run out and buy something for them.
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  • Adamar, I agree...I can only think of two people in my life aside from my sisters who I would buy a wedding gift for no matter what. 
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  • Seriously?  OP READ BEFORE POSTING.

    This topic is CURRENTLY being covered.  TODAY.  Right this moment.  In another thread.
  • I like buying or making gifts for people. There are some people I genuinely would buy gifts for, even if I wasn't invited to the wedding.

    Even then, please trust that I could find something suitable on my own, without your HM registry. If you registered at an actual store, I'd probably get you something from there. If you didn't register at all, I'd use my best judgement and get you something I think you'd like.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_destination-wedding-gift-registry?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:ba428a69-d080-43fe-9260-5f8cd8230597Post:123e7549-51af-4308-85c4-fe2d269c21e5">Re: Destination Wedding Gift Registry</a>:
    [QUOTE]I think registering (for anything) when you are eloping is rude. 
    Posted by Habs2Hart[/QUOTE]

    <div>Exactly this and registering for a honeymoon fund is doubly rude.  What you're wanting to do, register for essentially a vacation fund, is rude beyond belief.</div>
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  • I don't think it's wrong to make a small registry in cases where the couple elopes and then has a big party for friends and family.  Some people may want to buy gifts and may ask--just because you register, it doesn't mean that you broadcast it (whether you elope or have a giant wedding or anything in between).

    Trying to imagine this conversation though:
    Friend: I heard you got married, congrats!  I'd love to get you and your new H a little something.  Did you register?
    OP: Yes, we registered for money for our vacation.  Please give us money.
  • I apologize that this was already being discussed in another post. I actually just joined because I had a question. This was an idea that a few of my friends had mentioned but I didn't think it sounded like it was in good etiquette to do so. Thank you all for your posts and I will keep them in mind when anyone else mentions it. Smile
  • Honeymoon registries are in poor taste in general.  And giving gift information to people who aren't even invited to the wedding is even worse.  Elope, enjoy being married, the end.
  • edited January 2012
    You're setting up a registry so people who aren't even invited to your wedding can pay for your wedding?  It didn't sound like good etiquette because it isn't good etiquette.  I'm glad you realize that, OP.
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  • MyUserName1MyUserName1 member
    5000 Comments Fourth Anniversary 5 Love Its
    edited January 2012
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_destination-wedding-gift-registry?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:ba428a69-d080-43fe-9260-5f8cd8230597Post:f9d89a2a-0a85-4534-88f6-12ebb8d08c7a">Re: Destination Wedding Gift Registry</a>:
    [QUOTE]You're setting up a registry so people who aren't even invited to your wedding can pay for your wedding?  It didn't sound like good etiquette because it isn't good etiquette.  I'm glad you realize that, OP.
    Posted by StephBeanWed61502[/QUOTE]

    <div>thiiiiiis all over. Hope you change your plan, OP</div><div>
    </div><div>ETA:  Oooops. Missed that you said you would! </div>
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_destination-wedding-gift-registry?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:ba428a69-d080-43fe-9260-5f8cd8230597Post:021a0f71-2795-440d-8e9f-8b68bebcce09">Re: Destination Wedding Gift Registry</a>:
    [QUOTE]Seriously?  OP READ BEFORE POSTING. This topic is CURRENTLY being covered.  TODAY.  Right this moment.  In another thread.
    Posted by MyUserName1[/QUOTE]

    SHUT.UP. Seriously you annoy the crap out of me. Band Wagon Groupie.
  • If you hate me so much, you should have the balls to tell me so under your own name, not an AE.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_destination-wedding-gift-registry?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:ba428a69-d080-43fe-9260-5f8cd8230597Post:aeb0c772-f5fb-4081-a0d9-ea580b1a40c9">Re: Destination Wedding Gift Registry</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Destination Wedding Gift Registry : SHUT.UP. Seriously you annoy the crap out of me. Band Wagon Groupie.
    Posted by whonamesthemselvessnippybetches[/QUOTE]

    Oh hi, AE.  Nice to meet you too.
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_destination-wedding-gift-registry?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:ba428a69-d080-43fe-9260-5f8cd8230597Post:aeb0c772-f5fb-4081-a0d9-ea580b1a40c9">Re: Destination Wedding Gift Registry</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Destination Wedding Gift Registry : SHUT.UP. Seriously you annoy the crap out of me. Band Wagon Groupie.
    Posted by whonamesthemselvessnippybetches[/QUOTE]

    <div>Someone made an anti-Snippy AE. For some reason, this made me laugh way too hard.</div>
  • But didn't go out to attack Snippy with it.  That, I sort of find surprising.
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  • I don't hate you, you just annoy me. Say what you mean not what you think the regs on here do.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_destination-wedding-gift-registry?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:ba428a69-d080-43fe-9260-5f8cd8230597Post:9f1ce11c-4360-49cd-be3b-1233851c52d3">Re: Destination Wedding Gift Registry</a>:
    [QUOTE]But didn't go out to attack Snippy with it.  That, I sort of find surprising.
    Posted by baystateapple[/QUOTE]

    I'll get to her later
  • My point still stands.  You want to criticize me but you're too chicken to do it yourself.  That's crap.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_destination-wedding-gift-registry?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:ba428a69-d080-43fe-9260-5f8cd8230597Post:579d6f56-1eb1-44fe-aa35-80d1d8ca6710">Re: Destination Wedding Gift Registry</a>:
    [QUOTE]I'm not the AE, but OP came back and stated clearly that she saw the error of her ways.  Stop harping, dudes.
    Posted by EaglesBride2012[/QUOTE]

    <div>Agreed.</div><div>
    </div><div>Though now I want to know who hates Snippy so much.</div>
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_destination-wedding-gift-registry?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:ba428a69-d080-43fe-9260-5f8cd8230597Post:929ee9ac-d555-4057-834b-7feb4066a039">Re: Destination Wedding Gift Registry</a>:
    [QUOTE]My point still stands.  You want to criticize me but <strong>you're too chicken to do it yourself.</strong>  That's crap.
    Posted by MyUserName1[/QUOTE]

    I didn't realize I switched bodies today.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_destination-wedding-gift-registry?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:ba428a69-d080-43fe-9260-5f8cd8230597Post:de1a5628-75d9-4712-a37d-d634de44838e">Re: Destination Wedding Gift Registry</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Destination Wedding Gift Registry : <strong>I'll get to her later</strong>
    Posted by whonamesthemselvessnippybetches[/QUOTE]

    <div>
    </div><div>Hahahahaha now I'm looking forward to seeing this. </div>
    image
  • Snippy call out throw down.  You're going down AE.  All my money is on Snips. 
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  • I would like for this to get good enough for Bay to use her new powers. She has to test them somewhere, right?
  • Whatever, if you want to do this, we can.  But not under an AE.  I'm done.
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