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Wedding Etiquette Forum
Bridal Shower Bridezilla?
Soooo I had my bridal shower today! It was perfect, everything from the cute little mason jar centerpieces to the lunch to the cupcakes. My 6 bridesmaids all showed up on time and it was wonderful seeing all my family and friends. I even gave my girls goodie bags (body wash, loofa, lotion, hand sanitizer) for shower gifts because it didn't feel right they did all the work and didn't get to open anything lol (these were not their "bridal party gifts" just something nice for them). My MOH told them ahead of time how much each girl was to pitch in to cover everything and I'm not sure exactly how much but they split it evenly.
Here's the kicker... I didn't recieve a card or gift from 3 of my bridesmaids...I'm not trying to sound selfish, I totally understand that since they helped pay for the shower I'm not expecting a GIFT, but a CARD? Really? I was kind of sad that I didn't get a card..I'm sentimental, and they know that, and I love keeping mementos and would have loved to look back and read those every once in a while. Are the wedding hormones getting to me or am I normal when I say my feelings are hurt? It's not like I'm going to say anything to them about it but I just need some reassurance that it's ok to feel a little disappointed that they didn't even think to sign a card for me...
Here's the kicker... I didn't recieve a card or gift from 3 of my bridesmaids...I'm not trying to sound selfish, I totally understand that since they helped pay for the shower I'm not expecting a GIFT, but a CARD? Really? I was kind of sad that I didn't get a card..I'm sentimental, and they know that, and I love keeping mementos and would have loved to look back and read those every once in a while. Are the wedding hormones getting to me or am I normal when I say my feelings are hurt? It's not like I'm going to say anything to them about it but I just need some reassurance that it's ok to feel a little disappointed that they didn't even think to sign a card for me...
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Bridal Shower Bridezilla?
In answer to your comment about wanting reassurance that it was ok to feel disappointment- I don't think you are a bridezilla for feeling it. So feel it for a moment or an hour but move on and don't let it overshadow your wonderful bridal shower. I agree with Simply Fated that the pictures and memories of the shower will be much more meaningful in the long term. Good luck with your wedding planning.
[QUOTE]Soooo I had my bridal shower today! It was perfect, everything from the cute little mason jar centerpieces to the lunch to the cupcakes. My 6 bridesmaids all showed up on time and it was wonderful seeing all my family and friends. I even gave my girls goodie bags (body wash, loofa, lotion, hand sanitizer) for shower gifts because it didn't feel right they did all the work and didn't get to open anything lol (these were not their "bridal party gifts" just something nice for them). My MOH told them ahead of time how much each girl was to pitch in to cover everything and I'm not sure exactly how much but they split it evenly. Here's the kicker... I didn't recieve a card or gift from 3 of my bridesmaids...I'm not trying to sound selfish, I totally understand that since they helped pay for the shower I'm not expecting a GIFT, but a CARD? Really? I was kind of sad that I didn't get a card..I'm sentimental, and they know that, and I love keeping mementos and would have loved to look back and read those every once in a while. <strong>Are the wedding hormones getting to me or am I normal when I say my feelings are hurt?</strong> It's not like I'm going to say anything to them about it but I just need some reassurance that it's ok to feel a little disappointed that they didn't even think to sign a card for me...
Posted by jessk486[/QUOTE]
Unless you're also pregnant, there is no such thing as "wedding hormones." Just psychotic and entitled notions held by brides when they don't get what they want.
It's a card. Let it go.
[QUOTE]In Response to Bridal Shower Bridezilla? : Unless you're also pregnant, there is no such thing as "wedding hormones." Just psychotic and entitled notions held by brides when they don't get what they want. It's a card. Let it go.
Posted by MrsMuq[/QUOTE]
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</div><div>Thank you. This is exactly what I was going to say. </div>
Alright ladies...some of you have been helpful and some of you have just been downright sh*tty. I haven't been on here very long, and I don't post or ask questions very often, but it seems that when I do, I'm always shocked and disappointed at how some of these girls respond. This is supposed to be a helpful, positive place for brides to go to vent, and get advice and share stories with other brides. But to be honest, everytime I leave the discussion boards, I'm more frusterated than I was before I got on! Some of these ladies are rude, obnoxious, and downright hurtful. And I know this by personal experience and by reading other posts too. I know you can't control what other people say, and everyone has an opinion, but that doesn't mean you have to be so mean and negative. I think the whole point of these discussion boards have gotten lost in everyone's sh*tty attitudes.
And for the record, I am MORE THAN grateful for everything my girls have done and they know that because I'm sure to tell them all the time so THEY KNOW I am. I guess I was just surprised that I didn't get a card because I wouldn't forget to get them one. And FYI, I was a bridesmaid for ALL 3 of these girls for their weddings and just thought that it was proper ETIQUETTE to get the bride a card to express their happiness for the soon to be married couple. I'm sure you'll all go ballistic over this posting and leave a bunch of hateful messages..whatever it takes to make you feel good about youself. At the end of the day, YES I'm thankful for wonderful shower, and the card is a material thing and it's not a big deal, and I love my bridesmaids
[QUOTE]Alright ladies...some of you have been helpful and some of you have just been downright sh*tty. I haven't been on here very long, and I don't post or ask questions very often, but it seems that when I do, I'm always shocked and disappointed at how some of these girls respond. This is supposed to be a helpful, positive place for brides to go to vent, and get advice and share stories with other brides. But to be honest, everytime I leave the discussion boards, I'm more frusterated than I was before I got on! Some of these ladies are rude, obnoxious, and downright hurtful. And I know this by personal experience and by reading other posts too. I know you can't control what other people say, and everyone has an opinion, but that doesn't mean you have to be so mean and negative. I think the whole point of these discussion boards have gotten lost in everyone's sh*tty attitudes. And for the record, I am MORE THAN grateful for everything my girls have done and they know that because I'm sure to tell them all the time so THEY KNOW I am. I guess I was just surprised that I didn't get a card because I wouldn't forget to get them one. And FYI, I was a bridesmaid for ALL 3 of these girls for their weddings and just thought that it was proper ETIQUETTE to get the bride a card to express their happiness for the soon to be married couple. I'm sure you'll all go ballistic over this posting and leave a bunch of hateful messages..whatever it takes to make you feel good about youself. At the end of the day, YES I'm thankful for wonderful shower, <strong>and the card is a material thing and it's not a big deal</strong>, and I love my bridesmaids :)
Posted by jessk486[/QUOTE]
I'm glad you recognize that.<div>
</div><div>Honestly, it does sound like you're hung up on a material object that has less value than it's intention. Which is how your post came across, but maybe not how you intended for it to come across?</div><div>
</div><div>I've given birthday gifts without a card and i really hope the reciever didn't feel slighted because they didn't also recieve a card. Yikes, now I'm worried.</div><div>
</div><div><strong>" just thought that it was proper ETIQUETTE to get the bride a card to express their happiness for the soon to be married couple."</strong></div><div>I'm not sure of the proper etiquette procedure here. Does anyone know the answer to this?
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[QUOTE]Alright ladies...some of you have been helpful and some of you have just been downright sh*tty. I haven't been on here very long, and I don't post or ask questions very often, but it seems that when I do, I'm always shocked and disappointed at how some of these girls respond. This is supposed to be a helpful, positive place for brides to go to vent, and get advice and share stories with other brides. But to be honest, everytime I leave the discussion boards, I'm more frusterated than I was before I got on! Some of these ladies are rude, obnoxious, and downright hurtful. And I know this by personal experience and by reading other posts too. I know you can't control what other people say, and everyone has an opinion, but that doesn't mean you have to be so mean and negative. I think the whole point of these discussion boards have gotten lost in everyone's sh*tty attitudes. And for the record, I am MORE THAN grateful for everything my girls have done and they know that because I'm sure to tell them all the time so THEY KNOW I am. I guess I was just surprised that I didn't get a card because I wouldn't forget to get them one. And FYI, I was a bridesmaid for ALL 3 of these girls for their weddings and just thought that it was proper ETIQUETTE to get the bride a card to express their happiness for the soon to be married couple. I'm sure you'll all go ballistic over this posting and leave a bunch of hateful messages..whatever it takes to make you feel good about youself. At the end of the day, YES I'm thankful for wonderful shower, and the card is a material thing and it's not a big deal, and I love my bridesmaids :)
Posted by jessk486[/QUOTE]
Sorry you didn't get the advice you were looking for. The ladies here offer blunt advice and if it's not what you want to hear, I guess it does sound pretty bad when you aren't getting your validation.
Your BMs threw you a great shower! So why are you so obsessed with getting a card? It's a piece of paper, their hard work should live on in your memories.
I just had my shower last weekend and couldn't tell you if someone forgot to get me a card. The awesomeness of the shower and all the thought put into it had me in such a great mood.
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[QUOTE]I don't see where anyone was sh1tty to you, but you asked us our opnions and we gave them to you. I only buy cards for my FI. Any other gifts I give don't have cards with them. Just because cards mean something to you doesn't mean that they do to someone else. Your BMs threw you a lovely shower and you're upset that they didn't give you a card. This comes across sh1ttier than any of the respones you've gotten. You need to get over this, and the attitude that everyone should be shoving rainbows and unicorns up your ass.
Posted by beardownbchs[/QUOTE]
haha I love rainbows and unicorns
[QUOTE]Alright ladies...some of you have been helpful and some of you have just been downright sh*tty. I haven't been on here very long, and I don't post or ask questions very often, but it seems that when I do, I'm always shocked and disappointed at how some of these girls respond. This is supposed to be a helpful, positive place for brides to go to vent, and get advice and share stories with other brides. But to be honest, everytime I leave the discussion boards, I'm more frusterated than I was before I got on! Some of these ladies are rude, obnoxious, and downright hurtful. And I know this by personal experience and by reading other posts too. I know you can't control what other people say, and everyone has an opinion, but that doesn't mean you have to be so mean and negative. I think the whole point of these discussion boards have gotten lost in everyone's sh*tty attitudes. And for the record, I am MORE THAN grateful for everything my girls have done and they know that because I'm sure to tell them all the time so THEY KNOW I am. I guess I was just surprised that I didn't get a card because I wouldn't forget to get them one. And FYI, I was a bridesmaid for ALL 3 of these girls for their weddings and just thought that it was proper ETIQUETTE to get the bride a card to express their happiness for the soon to be married couple. I'm sure you'll all go ballistic over this posting and leave a bunch of hateful messages..whatever it takes to make you feel good about youself. At the end of the day, YES I'm thankful for wonderful shower, and the card is a material thing and it's not a big deal, and I love my bridesmaids :)
Posted by jessk486[/QUOTE]
This. Stop putting weight on the 2.00 that goes to Hallmark and instead focus on what your friends did. Actions speak louder than words.
Why are complaining about a card? They threw you a party. They probably just forgot. Big deal, most people throw out greeting cards a week later anyway.
There is not etiquette about giving cards, so I don't know where you got that from. It was super generous of them to even throw you a shower, as many brides don't get showers at all. You need to move past this.
My bridesmaids were awesome. I love them very much, and they did exactly what I expected of them at my wedding. They did not throw me a shower, only 3 attended my shower at all, and none of them got me shower gifts or cards, except for my sister-in-law, who regifted a nice frame. We only got a wedding gift from my MOH, none of the others got me a gift, and I could not care less. They were there to support me and they did throw me an excellent bachelorette party.
Focus on the good things!