This thread is hilarious. STB basically admits that she won't tell her family and friends the truth because she knows it would cause drama, and continues to try and defend her actions while KNOWING IT WOULD UPSET PEOPLE IF THEY KNEW THE TRUTH.
Amazing.
I "basically admit" nothing of the sort. I even went so far as to further explain what I meant by "drama" and it wasn't that I "know it would cause drama/would upset people" (in the traditional sense of the word drama). Again, I should not have used the word drama, I should have thought it through and used a different word. Then I wouldn't have had to explain much else. THEN I stated that if I had to wager I actually think no one who doesn't currently know the plan would care if they "found out" - which I then classified as highly improbable. If you're going to refer to me or my plans, please, do it correctly. Allow me to help you for next time: Wow, that STBEverhart, she sure is taking a gamble, she and her FI *may* piss some people off, and they're going about their plans anyway! That's pretty dicey. And selfish, careless, rude, mean, crass, (pick a word you like and insert it). Then when I read it, I can think: oh, this person at a minimum gets what's going on. I may not agree with her two cents, or was looking for her counsel, but at least she's factually on point.
@STBMrsEverhart I can tell you from experience with my brother and SIL getting married in Bermuda, we all witnessed her, my brother and my parents signing the marriage license because it was done in front of us all. That's usually how it is done in DWs. It gets done in front of the guests since usually it's a smaller crowd as opposed to a regular wedding.
To the OP, as I have stated above, my brother and SIL got married in Bermuda. They let everyone know that was where they were getting married and they were more than welcome to join if they could afford it. If not, they weren't going to hold it against them. About a month later, my parents hosted a cook out with family and friends to celebrate the wedding. The only thing we had was a cake, which nearly got fucked up. As long as you have extended the invitation to those you are inviting to the at home party to also go to the DW, I see no problem with it.
We are writing/directing (for lack of a better word) our own ceremony for the officiant since it is a symbolic ceremony (versus legal where it would have to be performed in Spanish/translated/and performed a certain way per Mexican law). When we're done vowing/exchanging/kissing/whatever else we have planned, we are leaving the ceremony site together for pics and our guests are heading to the reception area for cocktail hour. We won't be signing anything. They offer a symbolic certification signing (because apparently this is done ALL THE TIME by foreigners) but I think we're going to skip it because really, what are we going to do with a piece of paper emblazoned with the resort's logo attesting A+B got married at such and such a time and date?
I think STB is lying so that in the event her photographer doesn't get good enough photos, she can claim that the lost photos captured "real emotion" and therefore she's entitled to a forth "wedding."
Please don't give me any ideas...... But in reality I think two weddings, an after party and a TTD will be enough pics for one lifetime.
I think that you should let your guests know that they will not be witnessing you marriage and that you are already married. Let them decide if its worth their time and money.
One of my favorite pictures from our WEDDING DAY is of DH, me and the judge who was our officiant holding the marriage certificate we signed. On our WEDDING DAY. Because the day you sign the certificate is, of course, your WEDDING DAY.
As far a marrying for insurance, like STBMrsEverhart is planning to do, DH and I are both self-employed. So we buy our own, individual, health insurance. Because that's what GROWN UPs do. They live with the consequences of their life decisions.
Has anyone else been married in Mexico? I know it might have been discussed on the other thread, but FFS, it can't be that hard to get married there! People have destination weddings all the time, and they actually get married, paperwork and all. You can't be the only person who has had this idea to get married in Mexico.
Has anyone else been married in Mexico? I know it might have been discussed on the other thread, but FFS, it can't be that hard to get married there! People have destination weddings all the time, and they actually get married, paperwork and all. You can't be the only person who has had this idea to get married in Mexico.
Apparently a blood test and arriving a few days early is just TOO MUCH for STB to handle.
But the real reason she's lying to everyone is that she/her FI needs insurance so they're just going to be "kinda married' (you know for insurance purposes, like people who commit fraud) but not be "really married" until the ceremony in Mexico. Oh and according to her none of this is offensive to people who aren't legally permitted to marry and enjoy such luxuries like shared insurance.
Don't worry guys, I have the Wedding Police AND the Whambulance on speed dial!
Has anyone else been married in Mexico? I know it might have been discussed on the other thread, but FFS, it can't be that hard to get married there! People have destination weddings all the time, and they actually get married, paperwork and all. You can't be the only person who has had this idea to get married in Mexico.
Excepted directly from our resort's website. Bolding is mine:
For symbolic ceremonies the following list is not aplicable , this list is only for Legal marriage. The ceremony is preceded by a Judge. In order to get legally married in Tulum, there are a few requirements you need. Bride, Groom & Witnesses must arrive at the Hotel 4 working days prior to the wedding day (Saturdays, Sundays & Holidays do not count), the wedding coordinator must receive the following documents in order to start the corresponding application for a marriage in the Civil Registry Office.
Requirements:Tourist card (you will get them at your arrival to the Cancun airport).Birth certificates from bride and groom.If bride is divorced, and she has her married name in her Passport, she must bring the original Birth Certificates with the stamp (Le Apostille ) of the Registry of your Country. This document should be translated into Spanish and the cost is $110.00 usd +11% tax per each birth certificate, translation must be done here in Mexico, or do the translation at the Mexican embassy in their country by a certified translator. Otherwise will not be valid. (THIS DOCUMENT ALSO APPLY IF BRIDE OR GROOM HAVE A DIFERENT LAST NAME IN THEIR PASSPORTS FROM THEIR BIRTH CERTIFICATE - LAST NAME FATHER MUST BE THE SAME FOR BRIDE & GROOM LAST NAME).If Bride is divorced, she must bring a copy of the Final Divorce Decree with the stamp (Le Apostille) of the Registry of her Country. This document should be translated into Spanish and the cost is $90.00 usd+ 11% tax per page, translation must be done here in Mexico, or she can do the translation at the Mexican embassy in their country just by a certified translator.Valid Passports (This is essential, otherwise the wedding cannot be performed).The blood test are taken in Mexico, they are not valid if it is taken elsewhere. To be considered valid the test should not be taken more than 14 days prior to the ceremony. The blood will be tested for HIV, RPR (sexually transmitted diseases) and blood type. The results will be ready in 24 hours together with a certificate of the blood test and the charge will be $250 usd per couple to be paid directly to the doctor the day when test is taken.Another fee that you should consider the judge's transportation , they usually perform the civil ceremony in their office however is flexible to come to the resort if transportation is provided, the round trip from the city is $55 usd , this should be paid in cash to the judge the wedding date, you can arrange this in advance through the wedding coordinator.The names, addresses, nationalities, ages, occupation, relationship, copy of a tourist card and a valid identification of the 4 witnesses should be provide. Wedding Coordinator will send you the legal form, the witnesses could be relatives , friends or anyone who has valid Passport and over 18 years old.The Marriage Certificate is only valid in Mexico. In order to make it legal Internationally, the wedding coordinator will procsend a copy of your License to Validation Process.The fee for the Validation Procces and Translation of marriage license and shipping will be $ 165 usd, this should be paid in cash before the wedding. The process may take up to 3-4 month to be done. Once the document is Apostilled and tranlasted in English, the Hotel will send all documentation to your home address. Please if you don't receive the document in the time frame contact the wedding coordinator for update your complete address and phone number.* NEW LEGAL REQUIREMENT! Special Certificate (CIR). Please send 2 months prior the wedding scanned copies of the bride and groom's passport and birth certificates to request a NON marriage letter by Quintana Roo State. This letter certifies the couple does not have a previous marriage registered in the State of Quintana Roo. This Certification letter fee is $ 80 USD per wedding couple.If someone is divorced, they must send a scanned copy of the Divorce Decree & Birth Certificate Apostil, so the resort can send it to be translated in Spanish by a certified translator in Mexico.* None of the above mentioned services are included in our Wedding Packages and must be pay in cash before the wedding. All the prices are subject to change without previous notice. It is the couple's responsibility to have all the documents ready before the wedding.
So yea, it really is this big of a pain in the ass. THIS is what we made the decision to marry legally in the US first based on. Health insurance was a second factor made after the decision was made.
@STBMrsEverhart said......" As to your point about my wasting my free time here on TK, it's funny you should mention it, I was having a similar thought. As amusing as I find all of this, I really should be applying my too few hours away from work and other responsibilities doing much more productive things. I believe I shall. Repeating myself over, and over, and over has gotten dull. "
This was the only comment you made that gave me hope. The implication you were done and gone made me giddy. But realization soon sank in when yet another of your banal posts appeared. You do not speak the truth, so shame on me for thinking you would live up to that comment. I also realized that in your world, keeping up with the lies must be exhausting. How do you ever keep up with them all? (PS....this would also be rhetorical.)
If it's so fucking hard to get married in Mexico (all of the requirements you posted are still totally do-able if you really had your heart set on it), then why the fuck would you choose Mexico?
You're telling me there are no beaches anywhere in the world where it wouldn't have been relatively simple to get married?
Don't worry guys, I have the Wedding Police AND the Whambulance on speed dial!
If it is so damn impossible to pay another $800 or so for the proper documentation and to find four people willing to spend a week in Mexico, then you don't pretend to get married there. Take a honeymoon, vacation, whatever. It's just plain stupid to tell people to come to a fake-ass ceremony that they have to pay hundreds of dollars in flight+hotel to get to.
Oh and you know what else is expensive and inconvenient? Attending a destination wedding. But people do it because they want to see you get married. Way to push the inconvenience onto your guests and not even have the decency to tell them what they are actually attending.
Don't worry guys, I have the Wedding Police AND the Whambulance on speed dial!
If it's so fucking hard to get married in Mexico (all of the requirements you posted are still totally do-able if you really had your heart set on it), then why the fuck would you choose Mexico?
You're telling me there are no beaches anywhere in the world where it wouldn't have been relatively simple to get married?
Yes, the requirements are doable. But the associated cost is ridiculous as compared to $30 and it's a waste of time and effort. The main reason we chose Mexico, beside us both loving the Yucatan and having a lot of hookups down there was (A) Ease of travel. The three main places in the US people *may* travel from are all serviced by non-stop flights with major carriers (all the better for those who will be traveling using frequent flyer miles). Assuming most people who have expressed serious interest (as opposed to the, "oh, yea, we'll get back to you," courtesy invite types) will all most likely opt for a 4-5 day weekend. Who wants to chew up the first and last of those days with lengthy layovers, etc.? That's just a waste of precious vacation time. (B) Price, you can't barely beat Mexico! (C) And possibly one of the most important factors is my aunt and uncle close on their still-under-construction condo in the same little beach town about a month prior. It's a pretty big deal to my family and couldn't be a more awesomely convenient coincidence that it'll be ready so soon before our wedding. So pretty much my side is all chomping at the bit to get down there, wedding or no wedding.
No one we're related to or friends with would ever want us to throw away hard earned money to jump through hoops to abide by the rules of the Mexican government when we can get the same outcome for less than $50. If I were to show them the list I posted above, they'd all look at me like I was stupid and say, "take care of it in Denver before you go. Duh."
We're not saddened in the least that everyone on the most-likely-to-attend list is more excited for a tropical vacation and giant party than they are about our wedding. But to assume the people who will actually attend vs. those who were invited (but will decline) view attending as an inconvenience is patently false and a real uninformed assumption to boot. I don't want to use the words "no one cares" that we're getting married but seriously, in the grand scheme of things, people want to vacation, drink tequila, snorkel, sleep in late, scuba dive and sit on the beach. The wedding is an aside, one evening at best that everyone gets to get together and have a great dinner on the beach. We'll have been together 9 years at that point. Everyone has thought of us as married for YEARS. This whole legally married prior to the symbolic ceremony is seriously not a big deal in our circumstance. I'd love to see the data one how many couples say screw this when they see the legal requirements down there and do exactly like we are. We personally know 3 couples who have and I bet we meet more along the way.
@STBMrsEverhart said......" As to your point about my wasting my free time here on TK, it's funny you should mention it, I was having a similar thought. As amusing as I find all of this, I really should be applying my too few hours away from work and other responsibilities doing much more productive things. I believe I shall. Repeating myself over, and over, and over has gotten dull. "
This was the only comment you made that gave me hope. The implication you were done and gone made me giddy. But realization soon sank in when yet another of your banal posts appeared. You do not speak the truth, so shame on me for thinking you would live up to that comment. I also realized that in your world, keeping up with the lies must be exhausting. How do you ever keep up with them all? (PS....this would also be rhetorical.)
I never meant forever, sorry if you took it that way and now you're all disappointed. I meant I need to be more mindful of my priorities and make sure I'm not wasting time that can be spent being productive. I've promised myself only to argue with you girls during my morning coffee and late night hot toddy.
If no one will care that you are getting married before you leave for your fake ceremony in MX then there is no reason to lie to them. You're just continuously trying to rationalize a ton of lies to your family and friends (on the damn internet).
Strangers who have no weight in your life have told you how wrong this is over and over. Instead of having and epiphany of 'holy crap I'm being a selfish liar,' you just defend your poor decisions. (Yes, lying is a poor decision no matter how you choose to sugar coat it).
You are posting on the Etiquette Board where lying matters. I don't think it's necessary for you to keep defending lying on a board that is here to discuss treating your guests properly.
Lying about when your legal ceremony is to your guests is just poor etiquette. So why keep posting here just to receive heavy push back and be continuously told how wrong you are? I would think you would be over it by now?
Plain and simple: You're a liar. You are lying to your guests out of convenience for you. That's a crappy thing to do.
If no one will care that you are getting married before you leave for your fake ceremony in MX then there is no reason to lie to them. You're just continuously trying to rationalize a ton of lies to your family and friends (on the damn internet).
Strangers who have no weight in your life have told you how wrong this is over and over. Instead of having and epiphany of 'holy crap I'm being a selfish liar,' you just defend your poor decisions. (Yes, lying is a poor decision no matter how you choose to sugar coat it).
You are posting on the Etiquette Board where lying matters. I don't think it's necessary for you to keep defending lying on a board that is here to discuss treating your guests properly.
Lying about when your legal ceremony is to your guests is just poor etiquette. So why keep posting here just to receive heavy push back and be continuously told how wrong you are? I would think you would be over it by now?
Plain and simple: You're a liar. You are lying to your guests out of convenience for you. That's a crappy thing to do.
I don't think she is trying to defend her lies. I think she continues to post to practice her "craft" of lying. Trying to remember the cycle of lies laid forth takes a toll on memory. On here she is afforded a running record of the stories she spins. It must be some sort of memory exercise for her. This is nothing but a game to her. Sadly, she plays it in real life, too.
This isn't even about not wanting to jump through hoops in order to get married in Mexico. If it were simply about that, she'd sign the paperwork mere days before. My biggest issue is that she's signing the papers almost a YEAR before so that she can gain access to benefits reserved for married folk, all while claiming that they won't consider themselves to be married. Newsflash sweetheart, you can't have it both ways. You're not "sort of" married; either you are or you aren't. If you aren't, you sure as hell shouldn't be trying to take advantage of the benefits afforded to husbands and wives. If you are, you sure as hell shouldn't be lying to your friends and family about it so that you can trick them into participating in your little party (yes, it's a party and not a wedding; you'll be having your wedding this year - whether you like the style of it or not).
If no one will care that you are getting married before you leave for your fake ceremony in MX then there is no reason to lie to them. You're just continuously trying to rationalize a ton of lies to your family and friends (on the damn internet).
Strangers who have no weight in your life have told you how wrong this is over and over. Instead of having and epiphany of 'holy crap I'm being a selfish liar,' you just defend your poor decisions. (Yes, lying is a poor decision no matter how you choose to sugar coat it).
You are posting on the Etiquette Board where lying matters. I don't think it's necessary for you to keep defending lying on a board that is here to discuss treating your guests properly.
Lying about when your legal ceremony is to your guests is just poor etiquette. So why keep posting here just to receive heavy push back and be continuously told how wrong you are? I would think you would be over it by now?
Plain and simple: You're a liar. You are lying to your guests out of convenience for you. That's a crappy thing to do.
I continue to post because people continue to pose questions. I also know that there are many out there who do not agree with the general consensus on this board, certainly do not appreciate its tone and I enjoy knowing I have helped quite a few individuals.
If no one will care that you are getting married before you leave for your fake ceremony in MX then there is no reason to lie to them. You're just continuously trying to rationalize a ton of lies to your family and friends (on the damn internet).
Strangers who have no weight in your life have told you how wrong this is over and over. Instead of having and epiphany of 'holy crap I'm being a selfish liar,' you just defend your poor decisions. (Yes, lying is a poor decision no matter how you choose to sugar coat it).
You are posting on the Etiquette Board where lying matters. I don't think it's necessary for you to keep defending lying on a board that is here to discuss treating your guests properly.
Lying about when your legal ceremony is to your guests is just poor etiquette. So why keep posting here just to receive heavy push back and be continuously told how wrong you are? I would think you would be over it by now?
Plain and simple: You're a liar. You are lying to your guests out of convenience for you. That's a crappy thing to do.
I continue to post because people continue to pose questions. I also know that there are many out there who do not agree with the general consensus on this board, certainly do not appreciate its tone and I enjoy knowing I have helped quite a few individuals.
No you haven't. If anything, you made problems for these quite a few individuals by giving them bad advice.
This isn't even about not wanting to jump through hoops in order to get married in Mexico. If it were simply about that, she'd sign the paperwork mere days before. My biggest issue is that she's signing the papers almost a YEAR before so that she can gain access to benefits reserved for married folk, all while claiming that they won't consider themselves to be married. Newsflash sweetheart, you can't have it both ways. You're not "sort of" married; either you are or you aren't. If you aren't, you sure as hell shouldn't be trying to take advantage of the benefits afforded to husbands and wives. If you are, you sure as hell shouldn't be lying to your friends and family about it so that you can trick them into participating in your little party (yes, it's a party and not a wedding; you'll be having your wedding this year - whether you like the style of it or not).
This isn't even about not wanting to jump through hoops in order to get married in Mexico. If it were simply about that, she'd sign the paperwork mere days before. My biggest issue is that she's signing the papers almost a YEAR before so that she can gain access to benefits reserved for married folk, all while claiming that they won't consider themselves to be married. Newsflash sweetheart, you can't have it both ways. You're not "sort of" married; either you are or you aren't. If you aren't, you sure as hell shouldn't be trying to take advantage of the benefits afforded to husbands and wives. If you are, you sure as hell shouldn't be lying to your friends and family about it so that you can trick them into participating in your little party (yes, it's a party and not a wedding; you'll be having your wedding this year - whether you like the style of it or not).
This isn't even about not wanting to jump through hoops in order to get married in Mexico. If it were simply about that, she'd sign the paperwork mere days before. My biggest issue is that she's signing the papers almost a YEAR before so that she can gain access to benefits reserved for married folk, all while claiming that they won't consider themselves to be married. Newsflash sweetheart, you can't have it both ways. You're not "sort of" married; either you are or you aren't. If you aren't, you sure as hell shouldn't be trying to take advantage of the benefits afforded to husbands and wives. If you are, you sure as hell shouldn't be lying to your friends and family about it so that you can trick them into participating in your little party (yes, it's a party and not a wedding; you'll be having your wedding this year - whether you like the style of it or not).
Ok. I'm going to repeat this one more time, even though it's been stated in plain english enough times I'd think it could just be taken as a statement of fact by now. We made the decision to sign our marriage license before leaving for Mexico due to the ridiculousness of the hoops we'd have to jump through to abide by Mexican law FIRST. That decision was totally on lockdown, not negotiable, 100% set in stone. THEN the decision about the health insurance was made. So either way health insurance or no health insurance, we would have been legally married in the US prior to our wedding in Mexico. Our nearest and dearest are fully on board and have zero issues with our plan. Had they, our plans would have gone on exactly as they are without their support and attendance. You seem to think I cannot have my cake and eat too. But I say, WTF is the point in having cake then? Regardless of your condescending two cents the thing is: my FI will enjoy the benefits of my health insurance, which we'll pay dearly for, and we will enjoy an amazing, albeit chill and relaxed, wedding next year. So you can call it a party, or some Disneyworld shit until you're blue in the face. That changes nothing for us.
For what should be the last time, @STBMrsEverhart, what you are having in Mexico is NOT a "wedding." That is the first ceremony that declares you husband and wife, even if it's only for insurance purposes. Anything that follows is NOT a "wedding."
If no one will care that you are getting married before you leave for your fake ceremony in MX then there is no reason to lie to them. You're just continuously trying to rationalize a ton of lies to your family and friends (on the damn internet).
Strangers who have no weight in your life have told you how wrong this is over and over. Instead of having and epiphany of 'holy crap I'm being a selfish liar,' you just defend your poor decisions. (Yes, lying is a poor decision no matter how you choose to sugar coat it).
You are posting on the Etiquette Board where lying matters. I don't think it's necessary for you to keep defending lying on a board that is here to discuss treating your guests properly.
Lying about when your legal ceremony is to your guests is just poor etiquette. So why keep posting here just to receive heavy push back and be continuously told how wrong you are? I would think you would be over it by now?
Plain and simple: You're a liar. You are lying to your guests out of convenience for you. That's a crappy thing to do.
I don't think she is trying to defend her lies. I think she continues to post to practice her "craft" of lying. Trying to remember the cycle of lies laid forth takes a toll on memory. On here she is afforded a running record of the stories she spins. It must be some sort of memory exercise for her. This is nothing but a game to her. Sadly, she plays it in real life, too.
I'm not defending a thing. I'm answering questions as they are posed. You seem to think one lie equates to flagrantly lying, non-stop, all the time about everything to everyone. Sure, ok. If that is how it is, I hope you have never told a lie, big or small, white, grey or black, for any reason, ever. Because if you have, and we all know it's impossible to live to adulthood without not a single exaggeration, white lie, omitted detail, or outright fib, you are something far worse than a liar. You're a fucking hypocrite. And for the record, not mentioning something to a group of people doesn't take up any memory at all. It's pretty easy actually. There's lots of things I don't mention to people. And you know @mobkaz, you shouldn't make statements like, "Sadly, she plays it in real life, too" unless you know me in real life. What about my "real life" do you know? Nothing. You know very little about me. You know what I have posted on TK. So that amounts to my future last name, my age, my occupation and where I'll be getting married next year. That's really not that much. It certainly does not afford you the luxury of making assumptions about who I am "in real life." Well, coffee's gone......
So are the people you're lying to not your nearest and dearest? Why'd you even invite them then? Why are you not telling these people the truth too?
Seeing as her plan would have been to say "fuck you we're doing what we want" even if the people she did tell had an issue with it, I think it's safe to say that she has no nearest or dearest. Her people I care about list probably reads, "my, myself and I." I wouldn't be surprised if her husband (I think they're already married?) didn't even make the list.
Don't worry guys, I have the Wedding Police AND the Whambulance on speed dial!
This thread is like a train wreck, I just can't look away. STBEverhart, you sound really selfish and immature. I can at least follow your logic up to the point of lying to your guests. I wouldn't agree with doing the PPD in Mexico, but at least if the couple is honest, loved ones can make an informed decision about traveling. I can't get too up in arms about a couple who at least is honest about what they're doing. It's the lying, and then the lying about the fact that you're lying, that really blows my mind.
And let's not quibble about whether an omission is a lie (FWIW I say yes, at least about this magnitude), because what you're doing is not just an omission. Calling your Fi "fiancé" after your WEDDING (which as PPs have said is the day of your "paperwork" i.e. the day you become married) is a lie. He'll be your husband at that point. Inviting people to a "wedding" when you're already married is a lie. Just using these terms means you are expressly lying to everyone you discuss this with, every time you refer to your H as "Fi," every time you talk about your "wedding" that isn't a wedding.
I understand you've made your bed and are planning to lie in it. My hope is that any other lurking brides on this board can see the overwhelming consensus over lying to one's guests, and decide for themselves it isn't a good idea.
"I'm not a rude bitch. I'm ten rude bitches in a large coat."
If no one will care that you are getting married before you leave for your fake ceremony in MX then there is no reason to lie to them. You're just continuously trying to rationalize a ton of lies to your family and friends (on the damn internet).
Strangers who have no weight in your life have told you how wrong this is over and over. Instead of having and epiphany of 'holy crap I'm being a selfish liar,' you just defend your poor decisions. (Yes, lying is a poor decision no matter how you choose to sugar coat it).
You are posting on the Etiquette Board where lying matters. I don't think it's necessary for you to keep defending lying on a board that is here to discuss treating your guests properly.
Lying about when your legal ceremony is to your guests is just poor etiquette. So why keep posting here just to receive heavy push back and be continuously told how wrong you are? I would think you would be over it by now?
Plain and simple: You're a liar. You are lying to your guests out of convenience for you. That's a crappy thing to do.
I don't think she is trying to defend her lies. I think she continues to post to practice her "craft" of lying. Trying to remember the cycle of lies laid forth takes a toll on memory. On here she is afforded a running record of the stories she spins. It must be some sort of memory exercise for her. This is nothing but a game to her. Sadly, she plays it in real life, too.
I'm not defending a thing. I'm answering questions as they are posed. You seem to think one lie equates to flagrantly lying, non-stop, all the time about everything to everyone. Sure, ok. If that is how it is, I hope you have never told a lie, big or small, white, grey or black, for any reason, ever. Because if you have, and we all know it's impossible to live to adulthood without not a single exaggeration, white lie, omitted detail, or outright fib, you are something far worse than a liar. You're a fucking hypocrite. And for the record, not mentioning something to a group of people doesn't take up any memory at all. It's pretty easy actually. There's lots of things I don't mention to people. And you know @mobkaz, you shouldn't make statements like, "Sadly, she plays it in real life, too" unless you know me in real life. What about my "real life" do you know? Nothing. You know very little about me. You know what I have posted on TK. So that amounts to my future last name, my age, my occupation and where I'll be getting married next year. That's really not that much. It certainly does not afford you the luxury of making assumptions about who I am "in real life." Well, coffee's gone......
Ok not to be a creeper but actually we know your first name (from your other account) and if you google it we know your last name (it means "do-over" which is really ironic) your Fi' first name (begins with a letter very early in the alphabet) the place where you work, the city in which you live and your birthday. But I think what people were referring to is that they know you are lying in real life. By all means throw a party, but this insistence that your wedding is a small part of the vacation is ludacris. 20 people that you know didn't randomly decide to take off work and pick Mexico as a vaca spot. They are doing it because they want to see you get married.
Re: Destination wedding with second reception in home state
Requirements:Tourist card (you will get them at your arrival to the Cancun airport).Birth certificates from bride and groom.If bride is divorced, and she has her married name in her Passport, she must bring the original Birth Certificates with the stamp (Le Apostille ) of the Registry of your Country. This document should be translated into Spanish and the cost is $110.00 usd +11% tax per each birth certificate, translation must be done here in Mexico, or do the translation at the Mexican embassy in their country by a certified translator. Otherwise will not be valid. (THIS DOCUMENT ALSO APPLY IF BRIDE OR GROOM HAVE A DIFERENT LAST NAME IN THEIR PASSPORTS FROM THEIR BIRTH CERTIFICATE - LAST NAME FATHER MUST BE THE SAME FOR BRIDE & GROOM LAST NAME).If Bride is divorced, she must bring a copy of the Final Divorce Decree with the stamp (Le Apostille) of the Registry of her Country. This document should be translated into Spanish and the cost is $90.00 usd+ 11% tax per page, translation must be done here in Mexico, or she can do the translation at the Mexican embassy in their country just by a certified translator.Valid Passports (This is essential, otherwise the wedding cannot be performed).The blood test are taken in Mexico, they are not valid if it is taken elsewhere. To be considered valid the test should not be taken more than 14 days prior to the ceremony. The blood will be tested for HIV, RPR (sexually transmitted diseases) and blood type. The results will be ready in 24 hours together with a certificate of the blood test and the charge will be $250 usd per couple to be paid directly to the doctor the day when test is taken.Another fee that you should consider the judge's transportation , they usually perform the civil ceremony in their office however is flexible to come to the resort if transportation is provided, the round trip from the city is $55 usd , this should be paid in cash to the judge the wedding date, you can arrange this in advance through the wedding coordinator.The names, addresses, nationalities, ages, occupation, relationship, copy of a tourist card and a valid identification of the 4 witnesses should be provide. Wedding Coordinator will send you the legal form, the witnesses could be relatives , friends or anyone who has valid Passport and over 18 years old.The Marriage Certificate is only valid in Mexico. In order to make it legal Internationally, the wedding coordinator will procsend a copy of your License to Validation Process.The fee for the Validation Procces and Translation of marriage license and shipping will be $ 165 usd, this should be paid in cash before the wedding. The process may take up to 3-4 month to be done. Once the document is Apostilled and tranlasted in English, the Hotel will send all documentation to your home address. Please if you don't receive the document in the time frame contact the wedding coordinator for update your complete address and phone number.* NEW LEGAL REQUIREMENT! Special Certificate (CIR). Please send 2 months prior the wedding scanned copies of the bride and groom's passport and birth certificates to request a NON marriage letter by Quintana Roo State. This letter certifies the couple does not have a previous marriage registered in the State of Quintana Roo. This Certification letter fee is $ 80 USD per wedding couple.If someone is divorced, they must send a scanned copy of the Divorce Decree & Birth Certificate Apostil, so the resort can send it to be translated in Spanish by a certified translator in Mexico.* None of the above mentioned services are included in our Wedding Packages and must be pay in cash before the wedding. All the prices are subject to change without previous notice. It is the couple's responsibility to have all the documents ready before the wedding.
If no one will care that you are getting married before you leave for your fake ceremony in MX then there is no reason to lie to them. You're just continuously trying to rationalize a ton of lies to your family and friends (on the damn internet).
Strangers who have no weight in your life have told you how wrong this is over and over. Instead of having and epiphany of 'holy crap I'm being a selfish liar,' you just defend your poor decisions. (Yes, lying is a poor decision no matter how you choose to sugar coat it).
You are posting on the Etiquette Board where lying matters. I don't think it's necessary for you to keep defending lying on a board that is here to discuss treating your guests properly.
Lying about when your legal ceremony is to your guests is just poor etiquette. So why keep posting here just to receive heavy push back and be continuously told how wrong you are? I would think you would be over it by now?
Plain and simple: You're a liar. You are lying to your guests out of convenience for you. That's a crappy thing to do.
I couldn't agree more!
I couldn't agree more!