Wedding Etiquette Forum

is it rude to not serve meat?

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Re: is it rude to not serve meat?

  • jenajjthr said:
    NYCBruin said:
    jenajjthr said:
    If you are vegan, then you are not expected to serve meat even if you know you have meat eaters in attendance, (some like my husband don't really eat veggies because they have texture issues and avoid them at all cost) but you are not being rude if you don't. Meat eaters can suck it up for 6 hours, eat before or after, they aren' going to starve if they don't eat then and there. If you do eat meat, then you HAVE to provide at least a vegetarian option, if needed, or you are a rude host. This is a life style choice, stomachs can't handle meat any more, it's rude not to accommodate them, etc. Why the difference in which host is rude and which is not? If you choose to be vegan, awesome, but why force that on me? I sort of understand the ethics, but plants are living things as well. They have to be killed for our sustenance. What makes one killing better than the rest? That is where I think both sides need to be accommodating. You, again general you, may not approve of something, but remember not all guests hold those beliefs and should be hosted properly (both sides). For meat eaters find something more than mashed potatoes, veggies, or pasta with marinara. For vegans, be just as accommodating, it doesn't have to be steak, but there are meat dishes out there that are fulfilling, but aren't in your face either.
    This post is ridiculous and offensive.  Asking someone who eats meat to offer a vegetarian option is completely different than asking a vegan to offer meat.  One is asking someone to pay for something they are morally/ethically opposed to an one does not.

    The more appropriate analogy here would be to drinks.  Those who enjoy alcohol are expected to offer non-alcoholic options because otherwise the non-drinkers would be very thirsty.  Those who do not drink are not required to offer booze.  If you are at a dry wedding and you don't enjoy the non-alcoholic drinks offered (let's say you don't drink iced tea, but that's the only offering), then you're stuck with water but you can't say that you were forced to be thirsty.  You just didn't like the options offered.  There's nothing rude about the host not catering to your specific desires.  

    If someone is at a vegan wedding and decides they don't like the entree options, then they may have to fill up on sides.  Too bad, but that's what happens when you're picky and don't like the choices offered.  If I don't eat fish and don't like chicken, but those are the only two choices offered by the host, that's on me and not on the host.  The fact that the entree choices just happen to not include meat doesn't magically make it rude to not offer a guests' first choice.
    Most vegetarians/vegans I know fall into two camps...it's a healthy lifestyle choice or I'm opposed to the killing of animals. I'll address each separately. 

    Lifestyle for health reasons only. This is where I fully believe you should provide a meat option. This is your lifestyle choice, not everybody else's. If it's rude for me not to provide you a vegetarian/vegan option for your lifestyle choice than it's rude for you not to provide me a meat option for my omnivore lifestyle choice. (For me, it's mostly carnivore due to other issues neither here nor there...don't eat many plant based foods)

    If you choose to be vegetarian/vegan due to the morals and ethics of killing then I talk semantics and where I pissed off other pp's. I'm not a plant person, have a black thumb, but that doesn't mean that I don't recognize that they are beautiful living creatures that do respond to positive and negative feedback. Science has shown that plants do respond positively and negatively to different types of talk, music, environment, and so on. Plants do respond, just not in the cutesy, lovey, ways that animals do. They can't look at us with big brown eyes and with music playing in the background showing us the horror of their death. They can't make noise when we cut them from the ground, ripping them from their life source. But yet they die as well. But hey, since they aren't sentient in they way we say/think they should be then it's okay to kill them. It wasn't so long ago that we as humans didn't think animals were considered sentient beings either. I would say that there is probably still some scientific controversy on that aspect still.

    To respond to the drink analogy. I've been to weddings were I've only been offered coffee, tea, or water. No, didn't go thirsty, but I don't drink tea or coffee. I was slightly offended, not that I didn't get free alcohol, but soda is extremely cheap. It would be nice if it was offered as well. As for serving alcohol vs not serving alcohol. Alcohol is not food, therefore not really a good comparison to make. 
    plants don't have nerve endings. they don't have any way to process pain. this is the stupidest goddamn argument I've ever heard to explain away the entitlement of meat eaters, but i can guarentee someone who is so empathetic they won't kill a plant isnt eating meat, either. 
    I'm just saying if a person who is against killing because it's so bad, can't pick and choose which kind of killing is okay. It's not that I'm that empathetic, I'm the partial omnivore, remember? I just don't get the reasoning. I think it's illogical and using your words one of the "stupidest goddam arguments" I've heard for not choosing something to eat. 
  • mimivac said:
    To the poster who has never had a meal that did not contain an animal product, you have very unusual dietary preferences/restrictions. The couple are not obligated to cater to extremely specific guest preferences. That is your responsibility. It sounds as though even if pasta were served, you would object if it was prepared without eggs. This is too beyond the pale.
    I'm assuming you are not talking to me. . .

    Because if you are, I think you need to go back and re-read my posts.

    "Love is the one thing we're capable of perceiving that transcends time and space."


  • jenajjthr said:
    jenajjthr said:
    NYCBruin said:
    jenajjthr said:
    If you are vegan, then you are not expected to serve meat even if you know you have meat eaters in attendance, (some like my husband don't really eat veggies because they have texture issues and avoid them at all cost) but you are not being rude if you don't. Meat eaters can suck it up for 6 hours, eat before or after, they aren' going to starve if they don't eat then and there. If you do eat meat, then you HAVE to provide at least a vegetarian option, if needed, or you are a rude host. This is a life style choice, stomachs can't handle meat any more, it's rude not to accommodate them, etc. Why the difference in which host is rude and which is not? If you choose to be vegan, awesome, but why force that on me? I sort of understand the ethics, but plants are living things as well. They have to be killed for our sustenance. What makes one killing better than the rest? That is where I think both sides need to be accommodating. You, again general you, may not approve of something, but remember not all guests hold those beliefs and should be hosted properly (both sides). For meat eaters find something more than mashed potatoes, veggies, or pasta with marinara. For vegans, be just as accommodating, it doesn't have to be steak, but there are meat dishes out there that are fulfilling, but aren't in your face either.
    This post is ridiculous and offensive.  Asking someone who eats meat to offer a vegetarian option is completely different than asking a vegan to offer meat.  One is asking someone to pay for something they are morally/ethically opposed to an one does not.

    The more appropriate analogy here would be to drinks.  Those who enjoy alcohol are expected to offer non-alcoholic options because otherwise the non-drinkers would be very thirsty.  Those who do not drink are not required to offer booze.  If you are at a dry wedding and you don't enjoy the non-alcoholic drinks offered (let's say you don't drink iced tea, but that's the only offering), then you're stuck with water but you can't say that you were forced to be thirsty.  You just didn't like the options offered.  There's nothing rude about the host not catering to your specific desires.  

    If someone is at a vegan wedding and decides they don't like the entree options, then they may have to fill up on sides.  Too bad, but that's what happens when you're picky and don't like the choices offered.  If I don't eat fish and don't like chicken, but those are the only two choices offered by the host, that's on me and not on the host.  The fact that the entree choices just happen to not include meat doesn't magically make it rude to not offer a guests' first choice.
    Most vegetarians/vegans I know fall into two camps...it's a healthy lifestyle choice or I'm opposed to the killing of animals. I'll address each separately. 

    Lifestyle for health reasons only. This is where I fully believe you should provide a meat option. This is your lifestyle choice, not everybody else's. If it's rude for me not to provide you a vegetarian/vegan option for your lifestyle choice than it's rude for you not to provide me a meat option for my omnivore lifestyle choice. (For me, it's mostly carnivore due to other issues neither here nor there...don't eat many plant based foods)

    If you choose to be vegetarian/vegan due to the morals and ethics of killing then I talk semantics and where I pissed off other pp's. I'm not a plant person, have a black thumb, but that doesn't mean that I don't recognize that they are beautiful living creatures that do respond to positive and negative feedback. Science has shown that plants do respond positively and negatively to different types of talk, music, environment, and so on. Plants do respond, just not in the cutesy, lovey, ways that animals do. They can't look at us with big brown eyes and with music playing in the background showing us the horror of their death. They can't make noise when we cut them from the ground, ripping them from their life source. But yet they die as well. But hey, since they aren't sentient in they way we say/think they should be then it's okay to kill them. It wasn't so long ago that we as humans didn't think animals were considered sentient beings either. I would say that there is probably still some scientific controversy on that aspect still.

    To respond to the drink analogy. I've been to weddings were I've only been offered coffee, tea, or water. No, didn't go thirsty, but I don't drink tea or coffee. I was slightly offended, not that I didn't get free alcohol, but soda is extremely cheap. It would be nice if it was offered as well. As for serving alcohol vs not serving alcohol. Alcohol is not food, therefore not really a good comparison to make. 
    plants don't have nerve endings. they don't have any way to process pain. this is the stupidest goddamn argument I've ever heard to explain away the entitlement of meat eaters, but i can guarentee someone who is so empathetic they won't kill a plant isnt eating meat, either. 
    I'm just saying if a person who is against killing because it's so bad, can't pick and choose which kind of killing is okay. It's not that I'm that empathetic, I'm the partial omnivore, remember? I just don't get the reasoning. I think it's illogical and using your words one of the "stupidest goddam arguments" I've heard for not choosing something to eat. 
    no, you're just taking the argument to ridiculous extremes because, for who knows what reason, some meat eaters seem to think they're entitled to eat meat at a free meal provided for people with different morals.

    they day a corn stalk is shown to know pain is the day I stop eating it. but since that is biologically impossible..... 
  • MagicInk said:
    Most dried pasta does not have eggs in it.



    MagicInk said:
    Oreos @prettygirllost, oreos are vegan. See, you've had vegan food. Also I looked up Barilla pasta's ingredient list (because it was the first brand of pasta) and it looks vegan to me. No eggs or dairy listed.
    Lol, that's not real pasta.  We make ours from scratch or I buy the scratch made from an Italian grocery store;-)

    You got me on Oreos, yay!!!  I do love those, however I only have them with milk. . . they are so rich I need to wash them down with something!  I tried Scotch once and I am ashamed to admit it was kinda gross.

    ETA: How the fuck are these companies making pasta dough w/o eggs? Vegetable oil?
    Oh hell, if I boil dry pasta I consider that more then enough cooking. None of this fancy making it yourself business.   It's actually super easy to make pasta dough and spaghetti if you have a good dough recipe and a machine. . . raviolis on the other hand are a major pain in the ass!!!

    Did you...did you dunk the Oreos in the Scotch? I'm picturing that way for some reason. But...you wouldn't ruin scotch/oreos like that...right? Oh Heaven's no!  I just ate an Oreo or too, then tried to drink a bit of Scotch afterwards, but the two really didn't mix well.  We were out of milk and it was too late to go get any. . . well I was too lazy to go to a gas station to get any.  And we were already drinking Scotch so I thought, what the heck?!

    This is a shot of their ingredients. I dunno what each thing is to be honest. Also I didn't take this picture. Google gave it to me.  That's interesting. . . I wonder how they get the dough to stick together?  Now I'm really hungry for pasta!!!

    image


    "Love is the one thing we're capable of perceiving that transcends time and space."


  • jenajjthr said:
    It's rude to not serve a vegetarian option to vegetarians because they do not eat meat. It's not rude to serve vegan choices to omnivores because they do eat vegan food. You can say you don't eat vegan food all you want but it's not true - you just eat them in combination with animal based foods.
    Most vegan dishes offered to me though are not dishes I would eat, re: list provided earlier in this thread as examples. Yes, I do eat pasta with marinara, but I doubt that is what a vegan is planning on offering as one of their choices. 

    Off topic question to vegans specifically because this does baffle me. Why if you don't eat meat or dairy, especially for ethical reasons, do you manipulate some of your food to look like meat/dairy products? Hamburgers, meatballs, ice cream? Why do you want it to have the taste and texture of that product if you are so opposed to it? This is a serious question, not meant to be snarky or rude. I'm really curious and would love to know your reasons. 
    because being opposed to the absolutely horrific way a living, breathing, feeling creature was treated to make a product absolutely means we can't acknowledge that said products are delicious. and we can't recreate that product for our own guilt-free, cruelty-free enjoyment. 
    Thank you, that is the first time a person was able to give me an honest answer to why they want recreations. Most look at me like I grew a second head and go, "umm, I don't know" 


  • If you choose to be vegetarian/vegan due to the morals and ethics of killing then I talk semantics and where I pissed off other pp's. I'm not a plant person, have a black thumb, but that doesn't mean that I don't recognize that they are beautiful living creatures that do respond to positive and negative feedback. Science has shown that plants do respond positively and negatively to different types of talk, music, environment, and so on. Plants do respond, just not in the cutesy, lovey, ways that animals do. They can't look at us with big brown eyes and with music playing in the background showing us the horror of their death. They can't make noise when we cut them from the ground, ripping them from their life source. But yet they die as well. But hey, since they aren't sentient in they way we say/think they should be then it's okay to kill them. It wasn't so long ago that we as humans didn't think animals were considered sentient beings either. I would say that there is probably still some scientific controversy on that aspect still.

    So, to recap one of the most priceless anti-vegetarian screeds I've read since the early 90s:
    1) Vegetarians' ethical beliefs are mostly based on PETA videos with silly music in the background.
    2) Plants respond to external stimuli, much as single-celled bacteria and viruses do, therefore it's really hard to tell whether they find being eaten more painful than animals do.
    3) Sentience MIGHT come in many forms, and since we only know of one (you know, things with brains) and haven't figured out the others yet, it's stupid to treat the one form that we know of ethically, because reasons.
  • jenajjthr said:
    jenajjthr said:
    NYCBruin said:
    jenajjthr said:
    If you are vegan, then you are not expected to serve meat even if you know you have meat eaters in attendance, (some like my husband don't really eat veggies because they have texture issues and avoid them at all cost) but you are not being rude if you don't. Meat eaters can suck it up for 6 hours, eat before or after, they aren' going to starve if they don't eat then and there. If you do eat meat, then you HAVE to provide at least a vegetarian option, if needed, or you are a rude host. This is a life style choice, stomachs can't handle meat any more, it's rude not to accommodate them, etc. Why the difference in which host is rude and which is not? If you choose to be vegan, awesome, but why force that on me? I sort of understand the ethics, but plants are living things as well. They have to be killed for our sustenance. What makes one killing better than the rest? That is where I think both sides need to be accommodating. You, again general you, may not approve of something, but remember not all guests hold those beliefs and should be hosted properly (both sides). For meat eaters find something more than mashed potatoes, veggies, or pasta with marinara. For vegans, be just as accommodating, it doesn't have to be steak, but there are meat dishes out there that are fulfilling, but aren't in your face either.
    This post is ridiculous and offensive.  Asking someone who eats meat to offer a vegetarian option is completely different than asking a vegan to offer meat.  One is asking someone to pay for something they are morally/ethically opposed to an one does not.

    The more appropriate analogy here would be to drinks.  Those who enjoy alcohol are expected to offer non-alcoholic options because otherwise the non-drinkers would be very thirsty.  Those who do not drink are not required to offer booze.  If you are at a dry wedding and you don't enjoy the non-alcoholic drinks offered (let's say you don't drink iced tea, but that's the only offering), then you're stuck with water but you can't say that you were forced to be thirsty.  You just didn't like the options offered.  There's nothing rude about the host not catering to your specific desires.  

    If someone is at a vegan wedding and decides they don't like the entree options, then they may have to fill up on sides.  Too bad, but that's what happens when you're picky and don't like the choices offered.  If I don't eat fish and don't like chicken, but those are the only two choices offered by the host, that's on me and not on the host.  The fact that the entree choices just happen to not include meat doesn't magically make it rude to not offer a guests' first choice.
    Most vegetarians/vegans I know fall into two camps...it's a healthy lifestyle choice or I'm opposed to the killing of animals. I'll address each separately. 

    Lifestyle for health reasons only. This is where I fully believe you should provide a meat option. This is your lifestyle choice, not everybody else's. If it's rude for me not to provide you a vegetarian/vegan option for your lifestyle choice than it's rude for you not to provide me a meat option for my omnivore lifestyle choice. (For me, it's mostly carnivore due to other issues neither here nor there...don't eat many plant based foods)

    If you choose to be vegetarian/vegan due to the morals and ethics of killing then I talk semantics and where I pissed off other pp's. I'm not a plant person, have a black thumb, but that doesn't mean that I don't recognize that they are beautiful living creatures that do respond to positive and negative feedback. Science has shown that plants do respond positively and negatively to different types of talk, music, environment, and so on. Plants do respond, just not in the cutesy, lovey, ways that animals do. They can't look at us with big brown eyes and with music playing in the background showing us the horror of their death. They can't make noise when we cut them from the ground, ripping them from their life source. But yet they die as well. But hey, since they aren't sentient in they way we say/think they should be then it's okay to kill them. It wasn't so long ago that we as humans didn't think animals were considered sentient beings either. I would say that there is probably still some scientific controversy on that aspect still.

    To respond to the drink analogy. I've been to weddings were I've only been offered coffee, tea, or water. No, didn't go thirsty, but I don't drink tea or coffee. I was slightly offended, not that I didn't get free alcohol, but soda is extremely cheap. It would be nice if it was offered as well. As for serving alcohol vs not serving alcohol. Alcohol is not food, therefore not really a good comparison to make. 
    plants don't have nerve endings. they don't have any way to process pain. this is the stupidest goddamn argument I've ever heard to explain away the entitlement of meat eaters, but i can guarentee someone who is so empathetic they won't kill a plant isnt eating meat, either. 
    I'm just saying if a person who is against killing because it's so bad, can't pick and choose which kind of killing is okay. It's not that I'm that empathetic, I'm the partial omnivore, remember? I just don't get the reasoning. I think it's illogical and using your words one of the "stupidest goddam arguments" I've heard for not choosing something to eat. 
    So are you really trying to say that killing an animal and killing a plant is the same thing? Really? Does a plant cry out in pain? 

    What about killing a human and killing a plant? The same? 

  • jenajjthr said:
    jenajjthr said:
    It's rude to not serve a vegetarian option to vegetarians because they do not eat meat. It's not rude to serve vegan choices to omnivores because they do eat vegan food. You can say you don't eat vegan food all you want but it's not true - you just eat them in combination with animal based foods.
    Most vegan dishes offered to me though are not dishes I would eat, re: list provided earlier in this thread as examples. Yes, I do eat pasta with marinara, but I doubt that is what a vegan is planning on offering as one of their choices. 

    Off topic question to vegans specifically because this does baffle me. Why if you don't eat meat or dairy, especially for ethical reasons, do you manipulate some of your food to look like meat/dairy products? Hamburgers, meatballs, ice cream? Why do you want it to have the taste and texture of that product if you are so opposed to it? This is a serious question, not meant to be snarky or rude. I'm really curious and would love to know your reasons. 
    because being opposed to the absolutely horrific way a living, breathing, feeling creature was treated to make a product absolutely means we can't acknowledge that said products are delicious. and we can't recreate that product for our own guilt-free, cruelty-free enjoyment. 
    Thank you, that is the first time a person was able to give me an honest answer to why they want recreations. Most look at me like I grew a second head and go, "umm, I don't know" 


    i'm sorry my reply was snappy. the other poster has me infuriated and I shouldn't have snarked at you ecause of it. 
  • MagicInk said:
    Most dried pasta does not have eggs in it.



    MagicInk said:
    Oreos @prettygirllost, oreos are vegan. See, you've had vegan food. Also I looked up Barilla pasta's ingredient list (because it was the first brand of pasta) and it looks vegan to me. No eggs or dairy listed.
    Lol, that's not real pasta.  We make ours from scratch or I buy the scratch made from an Italian grocery store;-)

    You got me on Oreos, yay!!!  I do love those, however I only have them with milk. . . they are so rich I need to wash them down with something!  I tried Scotch once and I am ashamed to admit it was kinda gross.

    ETA: How the fuck are these companies making pasta dough w/o eggs? Vegetable oil?
    Oh hell, if I boil dry pasta I consider that more then enough cooking. None of this fancy making it yourself business.   It's actually super easy to make pasta dough and spaghetti if you have a good dough recipe and a machine. . . raviolis on the other hand are a major pain in the ass!!!

    Did you...did you dunk the Oreos in the Scotch? I'm picturing that way for some reason. But...you wouldn't ruin scotch/oreos like that...right? Oh Heaven's no!  I just ate an Oreo or too, then tried to drink a bit of Scotch afterwards, but the two really didn't mix well.  We were out of milk and it was too late to go get any. . . well I was too lazy to go to a gas station to get any.  And we were already drinking Scotch so I thought, what the heck?!

    This is a shot of their ingredients. I dunno what each thing is to be honest. Also I didn't take this picture. Google gave it to me.  That's interesting. . . I wonder how they get the dough to stick together?  Now I'm really hungry for pasta!!!

    image


    My guess is the pasta is held together by one of the unidentifiable ingredients.
  • actually, i take it back, i thought you were two different posters. i did mean to be snarky to you. 
  • jdluvr06 said:
    MagicInk said:
    Most dried pasta does not have eggs in it.



    MagicInk said:
    Oreos @prettygirllost, oreos are vegan. See, you've had vegan food. Also I looked up Barilla pasta's ingredient list (because it was the first brand of pasta) and it looks vegan to me. No eggs or dairy listed.
    Lol, that's not real pasta.  We make ours from scratch or I buy the scratch made from an Italian grocery store;-)

    You got me on Oreos, yay!!!  I do love those, however I only have them with milk. . . they are so rich I need to wash them down with something!  I tried Scotch once and I am ashamed to admit it was kinda gross.

    ETA: How the fuck are these companies making pasta dough w/o eggs? Vegetable oil?
    Oh hell, if I boil dry pasta I consider that more then enough cooking. None of this fancy making it yourself business.   It's actually super easy to make pasta dough and spaghetti if you have a good dough recipe and a machine. . . raviolis on the other hand are a major pain in the ass!!!

    Did you...did you dunk the Oreos in the Scotch? I'm picturing that way for some reason. But...you wouldn't ruin scotch/oreos like that...right? Oh Heaven's no!  I just ate an Oreo or too, then tried to drink a bit of Scotch afterwards, but the two really didn't mix well.  We were out of milk and it was too late to go get any. . . well I was too lazy to go to a gas station to get any.  And we were already drinking Scotch so I thought, what the heck?!

    This is a shot of their ingredients. I dunno what each thing is to be honest. Also I didn't take this picture. Google gave it to me.  That's interesting. . . I wonder how they get the dough to stick together?  Now I'm really hungry for pasta!!!

    image


    My guess is the pasta is held together by one of the unidentifiable ingredients.
    niacin is a jelly-like product made from fruit and is what gives it hold :) the other sciency sounding ingredients are vitamins
  • jdluvr06 said:
    MagicInk said:
    Most dried pasta does not have eggs in it.



    MagicInk said:
    Oreos @prettygirllost, oreos are vegan. See, you've had vegan food. Also I looked up Barilla pasta's ingredient list (because it was the first brand of pasta) and it looks vegan to me. No eggs or dairy listed.
    Lol, that's not real pasta.  We make ours from scratch or I buy the scratch made from an Italian grocery store;-)

    You got me on Oreos, yay!!!  I do love those, however I only have them with milk. . . they are so rich I need to wash them down with something!  I tried Scotch once and I am ashamed to admit it was kinda gross.

    ETA: How the fuck are these companies making pasta dough w/o eggs? Vegetable oil?
    Oh hell, if I boil dry pasta I consider that more then enough cooking. None of this fancy making it yourself business.   It's actually super easy to make pasta dough and spaghetti if you have a good dough recipe and a machine. . . raviolis on the other hand are a major pain in the ass!!!

    Did you...did you dunk the Oreos in the Scotch? I'm picturing that way for some reason. But...you wouldn't ruin scotch/oreos like that...right? Oh Heaven's no!  I just ate an Oreo or too, then tried to drink a bit of Scotch afterwards, but the two really didn't mix well.  We were out of milk and it was too late to go get any. . . well I was too lazy to go to a gas station to get any.  And we were already drinking Scotch so I thought, what the heck?!

    This is a shot of their ingredients. I dunno what each thing is to be honest. Also I didn't take this picture. Google gave it to me.  That's interesting. . . I wonder how they get the dough to stick together?  Now I'm really hungry for pasta!!!

    image


    My guess is the pasta is held together by one of the unidentifiable ingredients.
      Supposedlyit's just held together with water.

    "Love is the one thing we're capable of perceiving that transcends time and space."


  • oops, actually i'm thinking of pectin lol. niacin is a vitamin too. 
  • AddieCake said:
    JFC I cannot believe this argument has gone on for 7 pages. I am probably the pickiest eater on this site, and it would not affect me at all to eat a vegan meal for one meal. If it affected me, it would be b/c I didn't care for it, but I run that risk any time I go to a new restaurant, someone's house, or wedding or other function because there are tons of foods I don't like. I even had a hell of a time choosing food for my own wedding because of this. Guess what? If I don't get enough to eat, I stop and get something else on the way home.
    @AddieCake agreed. This is silly. 

    I understand being bummed if it wasn't food you liked. I have to say that I'd be bummed if I didn't like anything there, I'm a picky eater too, and I might grouch to FI in the car, away from everyone else. But I wouldn't really be upset, just hungry and I'd get over it when FI buys me a lovely milkshake and burger on the way home (since he would have eaten my plate clean). I would never say anything to the couple or even let any hungry complaints be heard by anyone but FI.   Anyways, FI always goes hungry at events because he eats about 2-3 times as much as I do for dinner and he would never complain about not getting enough. Why would it be different if they just happened to serve food I don't like?  Most of the time, I give him my meat and veggies for his potatoes anyways.  The point is that this is a free meal, being hosted by the couple. I wouldn't bitch if their wasn't soda or alcohol, how come meat is so special? 

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  • I wanted to know why one host (meat eater/omnivore) has to offer a choice, but one host (vegetarian/vegan) doesn't have to take ALL their guests into consideration. I did serve a vegan option at my wedding. I will be taking my now diagnosed diabetic niece and newly diagnosed niece with Crohn's at the graduation party for my stepson into consideration, no vegetarians this time. I do have vegetarian friends, none vegan, and although none would go so far as to provide steak, they would take my comfort level into account when having me at their hosted event. That may mean finding some meat dish or finding a non meat dish that isn't to their particular liking. I didn't like the vegetarian option at my wedding, but then again, I wasn't eating eat, they were. I made sure their comfort came before my own, like a good host should. That is my point. It stops being about me when I invite others. I kind of get annoyed that I'm told that I can suck it up for one meal, but gosh darn it my vegan friends can't. You are right, they can't. It would be downright rude. So it is to be just as rude to me. Doesn't mean you have to give this "entitled" meat eater steak, but it would be nice if you gave me just as much consideration as this meat eater gave you.
  • This has seriously gone on for 7 pages? FFS. There is nothing wrong with not serving meat!
  • jenajjthr said:
    I wanted to know why one host (meat eater/omnivore) has to offer a choice, but one host (vegetarian/vegan) doesn't have to take ALL their guests into consideration. I did serve a vegan option at my wedding. I will be taking my now diagnosed diabetic niece and newly diagnosed niece with Crohn's at the graduation party for my stepson into consideration, no vegetarians this time. I do have vegetarian friends, none vegan, and although none would go so far as to provide steak, they would take my comfort level into account when having me at their hosted event. That may mean finding some meat dish or finding a non meat dish that isn't to their particular liking. I didn't like the vegetarian option at my wedding, but then again, I wasn't eating eat, they were. I made sure their comfort came before my own, like a good host should. That is my point. It stops being about me when I invite others. I kind of get annoyed that I'm told that I can suck it up for one meal, but gosh darn it my vegan friends can't. You are right, they can't. It would be downright rude. So it is to be just as rude to me. Doesn't mean you have to give this "entitled" meat eater steak, but it would be nice if you gave me just as much consideration as this meat eater gave you.
    I was going to write out a response, but if you can't understand after everything that has already been said, then you are a lost cause. 
    sexy, harry styles, best song ever, cute, beautiful, asdjglñlñ, marcel
  • jenajjthr said:
    I wanted to know why one host (meat eater/omnivore) has to offer a choice, but one host (vegetarian/vegan) doesn't have to take ALL their guests into consideration. I did serve a vegan option at my wedding. I will be taking my now diagnosed diabetic niece and newly diagnosed niece with Crohn's at the graduation party for my stepson into consideration, no vegetarians this time. I do have vegetarian friends, none vegan, and although none would go so far as to provide steak, they would take my comfort level into account when having me at their hosted event. That may mean finding some meat dish or finding a non meat dish that isn't to their particular liking. I didn't like the vegetarian option at my wedding, but then again, I wasn't eating eat, they were. I made sure their comfort came before my own, like a good host should. That is my point. It stops being about me when I invite others. I kind of get annoyed that I'm told that I can suck it up for one meal, but gosh darn it my vegan friends can't. You are right, they can't. It would be downright rude. So it is to be just as rude to me. Doesn't mean you have to give this "entitled" meat eater steak, but it would be nice if you gave me just as much consideration as this meat eater gave you.
    because one has valid reason to not eat meat. the other is throwing a temper tantrum, stomping their feet because it's not FAIR they have to eat a meat free meal they would be perfectly happy with if they threw some chicken in.
    Serious question...Why is the vegan choice more valid than mine? Gonna play this argument out since you think I'm throwing a temper tantrum. Actually I'm sitting in my chair, with a mild migraine, being as logical as I can. I understand that a person who has chosen to be a vegetarian/vegan has done so with very strong convictions and it should be respected. But that doesn't mean my choice to eat meat is any less valid. I can eat a non meat dish, and have eaten them, but my vegetarian friends have made sure it would be something I like. They did this by talking to me, finding out my likes and dislikes when it came to non meat food if they didn't want to pay for meat. What they didn't do was tell me to suck it up for one meal and treat me as less than. If I'm close enough to be invited to their party, then I'm close enough to be considered to when it comes to choosing their menu. 

    Sometimes I think people who are vegetarian/vegan have this holier than thou attitude towards people who eat meat. Like we are some stupid neanderthals who don't know any better. We kill, we bad. 
  • jenajjthr said:
    I wanted to know why one host (meat eater/omnivore) has to offer a choice, but one host (vegetarian/vegan) doesn't have to take ALL their guests into consideration. I did serve a vegan option at my wedding. I will be taking my now diagnosed diabetic niece and newly diagnosed niece with Crohn's at the graduation party for my stepson into consideration, no vegetarians this time. I do have vegetarian friends, none vegan, and although none would go so far as to provide steak, they would take my comfort level into account when having me at their hosted event. That may mean finding some meat dish or finding a non meat dish that isn't to their particular liking. I didn't like the vegetarian option at my wedding, but then again, I wasn't eating eat, they were. I made sure their comfort came before my own, like a good host should. That is my point. It stops being about me when I invite others. I kind of get annoyed that I'm told that I can suck it up for one meal, but gosh darn it my vegan friends can't. You are right, they can't. It would be downright rude. So it is to be just as rude to me. Doesn't mean you have to give this "entitled" meat eater steak, but it would be nice if you gave me just as much consideration as this meat eater gave you.
    So are we all supposed to ask every single guest their personal likes and dislikes regarding food? There are plenty of vegan or vegetarian options that are considered a full entree at many restaurants. Butternut squash ravioli, for example. Am I supposed to ask you if you like butternut squash? Because just because there is no meat in it does not mean it is not a valid meal option. It is food that does not contain meat. 

    If you can't eat gluten, that's another story and there will be another non-meat, gluten-free option for you. But I'm not going to ask each guest what they'd personally like to eat at the wedding.

    If you don't like any of those options, eat a big lunch before and stop for a hamburger on the way home. Do you know how many times I've gone to a luncheon or event, and happily ate non-meat side dishes or discreetly brought my own power bar? Get over yourself.
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