Etiquette of Rehearsal Dinner HELL I MEAN HELP!

bride2b71614 · September 2015

I think there is a lot of deep rooted resentment with your future in laws. I'm sorry that you felt pressured to say yes, but I think that you should at least indulge your future in laws and go to a family dinner. You don't have to ask your wedding party to be there. I also think that you need to let go of the the anger you have toward your future in laws and your father and step mom. Just because they aren't showing enthusiasm doesn't mean they don't care. It was difficult for me to realize this myself, but it's the best thing to do going forward.

photokitty · September 2015

I would reply with sage advice, but I can't because I'm too busy dying over a taste test being a once in a lifetime event.

Are you fucking kidding me??? That is some funny shit right there!!!

Good one...bye Felicia.

spockforprez · September 2015

OP, it's hard to have perspective now, but try to think about how you will feel after the wedding when you look back at all the fuss you went through (or were put through, however it's gone down) over this Friday night dinner.

Your FMIL and FSIL will presumably be a part of your life for the next 30-50 years. It sounds to me like they're trying to make up for the fact that they can't be a part of the rehearsal and still want to spend time celebrating you & your FH before the wedding. That's a good thing - try to see it that way. It's not at a restaurant that's super convenient for you, and that's a bummer, but not a big deal when you think about 30-50 years of celebrations, dinners, holidays, special occasions. Especially since you mentioned your WP is only two adults and two kids. That's not asking a dozen or more people to make a special trip. Even if it were, you could nix inviting the WP and have it just be family.

Unless the FMIL and FSIL are truly emotionally manipulative or abusive (in which case you are free to draw a line and shut them down) try to assume positive intent rather than malice.

ShesSoCold · September 2015

Knottie26706181 said:

Someone calling me psycho and I don't love or like my in-laws...that's pretty rude in my opinion. Have you read every response? Some of the things are pretty rude from someone not knowing me and exactly what has transpired. No people dont have to show up, but I am sure if they get invited to something they will feel a little pressure to show up. We have a very small party so if the best man or maid of honor doesnt show up then 1/6 of the wedding party isnt showing up, its me, him, bm, moh, flower girl and ringbearer. Why wouldnt we invite them if it such a small party, then doesnt that look rude? Or maybe its not me...maybe that is it. Maybe that his mom has always treated him extremely different from his brother and sister and this situation isnt much different than how the rest of his life has gone how about that? I wont get into that either, but lets just if he has a blue collar job it isnt quite up her alley. He has always been the blacksheep of the family so yeah if I am marrying him maybe so then maybe I am not good enough for their family since he has never been? Even though that is totally not fair or the case so dont say nasty things like that. That is exactly what I am saying, rude people I tell you when you only know a quarter of the whole deal. I shouldnt even be explaining myself but I have never been in situation where I felt like I needed to defend myself so much and I shouldnt have to. You are right I probably shouldnt of agreed to it but I was under pressure and trying to make them happy and so I finally gave in and after sitting on it for a week I was sick of feeling like it was not what we wanted so he had the talk. She did have to put a deposit down which I said I would pay for however we are now applying that deposit to the brunch the day after the wedding so no money was lost.

southernbelle0915 · September 2015

photokitty said:

I would reply with sage advice, but I can't because I'm too busy dying over a taste test being a once in a lifetime event. Are you fucking kidding me??? That is some funny shit right there!!! Good one...bye Felicia.

This. LOL!

We didn't even have a tasting....

Nooooo!! Life = incomplete.

PrettyGirlLost · September 2015

scribe95 said:

Did I miss where OP was called a psycho?

If you did, then so did I.

Knottie26706181 said:

SP29 said:

STARMOON44 said:

Yeah but she's saying "thanks but no thanks" to his mother being able to attend the rehearsal dinner at all so she can go to the spa. That's just so selfish, and childish, and wrong I can't even with it. I mean sure, totes "correct" I guess but don't come crying when his whole family thinks you're a psycho.

Oh. . . well just consider the source, lol.

STARMOON44 · September 2015

PrettyGirlLost said:

scribe95 said:

Did I miss where OP was called a psycho?

If you did, then so did I.

Knottie26706181 said:

SP29 said:

STARMOON44 said:

Maggie0829 said:

Yeah but she's saying "thanks but no thanks" to his mother being able to attend the rehearsal dinner at all so she can go to the spa. That's just so selfish, and childish, and wrong I can't even with it. I mean sure, totes "correct" I guess but don't come crying when his whole family thinks you're a psycho.

Oh. . . well just consider the source, lol.

Excuse me?

ShesSoCold · September 2015

STARMOON44 said:

scribe95 said:

Did I miss where OP was called a psycho?

If you did, then so did I.

Knottie26706181 said:

SP29 said:

STARMOON44 said:

Yeah but she's saying "thanks but no thanks" to his mother being able to attend the rehearsal dinner at all so she can go to the spa. That's just so selfish, and childish, and wrong I can't even with it. I mean sure, totes "correct" I guess but don't come crying when his whole family thinks you're a psycho.

Oh. . . well just consider the source, lol.
Excuse me?

STUCK ---------------------

Please tell me someone else watched RHOOC last night where Tamra and Brooks have this EXACT SAME exchange.

Maggie0829 · September 2015

PrettyGirlLost said:

scribe95 said:

Did I miss where OP was called a psycho?

If you did, then so did I.

Knottie26706181 said:

SP29 said:

STARMOON44 said:

Yeah but she's saying "thanks but no thanks" to his mother being able to attend the rehearsal dinner at all so she can go to the spa. That's just so selfish, and childish, and wrong I can't even with it. I mean sure, totes "correct" I guess but don't come crying when his whole family thinks you're a psycho.

Oh. . . well just consider the source, lol.

Etiquette of Rehearsal Dinner HELL I MEAN HELP!

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