I judge

Megan+Adam

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_i-judge?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:c4a6efd4-44fc-4f53-965e-3bf900f76fbePost:7b2caf69-3739-4984-8f34-5b60088a7645">Re: I judge</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: I judge : Does this happen often?
Posted by sparent2010[/QUOTE]

<div>I'd say it happens at 50% of the weddings I go to. Sometimes someone will just pull me into one and then I have to figure out how to escape without becoming the front of my own stupid line.</div>

specialk84

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_i-judge?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:c4a6efd4-44fc-4f53-965e-3bf900f76fbePost:85c34205-081d-4223-ad03-8c1cec6ed9f1">Re: I judge</a>:
[QUOTE]I feel bad enough that I'm going to have to pester people to donate to the Leukemia and Lymphoma society - but just being like "Buy shiit from me!!" ain't cool. At least my stuff is going to a charity. I feel less bad at about it.
Posted by LDYGTR13[/QUOTE]

<div>Well, a chunk of it is going to charity. Another chunk is paying for your hotel, airfare, and entry fee, correct?</div><div>
</div><div>I'll still donate.</div>

[Deleted User]

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_i-judge?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:c4a6efd4-44fc-4f53-965e-3bf900f76fbePost:db470780-19a7-47ee-bbf7-a4cb873bb8ec">Re: I judge</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: I judge : I'd say it happens at 50% of the weddings I go to. Sometimes someone will just pull me into one and then I have to figure out how to escape without becoming the front of my own stupid line.
Posted by Megan+Adam[/QUOTE]

I just try to be discretely out of the room and at the bar until the madness ends.

mdeidre

I judge my former friend who got $250K in a lawsuit last year and is broke already with nothing to show for it!  She is still iving in the projects but hey, she's got new clothes and furniture.  If I had gotten that money, I would have bought a nice house in a decent neighborhood, two nice cars for FI and I and put the rest into either buying rental property or some other low risk investment.  Heck, even if I put it in the bank it would be better than that!

She's got another $250K coming in 15 years but she's already got loans against it, so how much is she really going to end up with in the long run?

AllAboutTheBenjamin

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_i-judge?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:c4a6efd4-44fc-4f53-965e-3bf900f76fbePost:41f861ee-b571-4142-94af-edde53ac4893">Re: I judge</a>:
[QUOTE]AATB - yea, that situation would make me feel squiggly. Do you think y'all are going to go?
Posted by rachers1017[/QUOTE]


See, it's this terrible decision - if I tell Ben we are most certainly not going, then he and I would be the only ones in the in-law family not going.  So then I'd look like an asshole, because I would be the one saying.  But if we do go, then we are also assholes, because we weren't officially invited.

Weddings are making me nuts right now.  A friend of mine is getting married this summer and I'm debating whether or not to go because my psycho ex will be there.  And another friend of mine invited us to their reception.  Yes.  A tiered wedding. 

The only wedding I want to go to this year is my best friend's in October.  And that's only because I get to wear a bridesmaids dress and get my hair all did.

blgrout

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_i-judge?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:c4a6efd4-44fc-4f53-965e-3bf900f76fbePost:8260e1e5-8766-45ea-905e-8a191401b046">Re: I judge</a>:
[QUOTE]I judge FI's great aunt for telling FI's grandmother that instead of bringing her husband to our wedding, she's bringing her two grand children. I wrote everyone's name on the RSVP for a reason. 
Posted by onloveonlife[/QUOTE]

One of my other cousins did this too.  Instead of bringing his wife, he's bringing one of his sons.  He asked if that was ok, if he promised to make him sit on his lap and share his plate. FFS, just bring your damn kid, he can have a chair and a plate, even though the invite was to you and your wife.  Apparently writing names on the RSVP cards is meaningless to some.

ceh789

I judge Pampered Chef parties masquerading as Wedding Showers.

I also judge people who invite you to a "cocktail party" and it's really a sales party.

myname1234

I also judge my ex-MIL for inviting herself to a get-to-know-you dinner (FI met my ex-SIL/BIL ....they are still part of the kids' lives), telling me I'm paying for her meal, not saying thank you afterward and THEN proceeding to tell me FI will never replace her son.

Trust me - he wouldn't want to.

LDYGTR13

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_i-judge?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:c4a6efd4-44fc-4f53-965e-3bf900f76fbePost:8a5d3593-9374-46f3-b27e-1015de19cc8b">Re: I judge</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: I judge : Well, a chunk of it is going to charity. Another chunk is paying for your hotel, airfare, and entry fee, correct? I'll still donate.
Posted by specialk84[/QUOTE]
Well yes, technically, but without those amenities and stuff it's only $2800 - and I'd be perfectly fine footing $400 for the trip if I could still get the discounts they get for us for having so many TNT folks :)<div>
</div><div>And I love you. </div>

specialk84

I've gone to Mary Kay, Tupperware, and Silpada parties. I needed new Tupperware stuff, and I wanted some new makeup (and free samples). The Silpada thing was a waste of time.

I have no idea what these other things are.

AllAboutTheBenjamin

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_i-judge?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:c4a6efd4-44fc-4f53-965e-3bf900f76fbePost:33bcb2cb-45f2-4479-8572-88f10d1cfcda">Re: I judge</a>:
[QUOTE]I agree with LDY. I am so dang sick of my friends asking me to buy things and host parties for them. NO.
Posted by jennamarie10[/QUOTE]


Okay, yeah.  Hate this too.  Under what circumstance is it okay to invite a friend to a party where they're expected to buy a bunch of shiit so you can get a fucking discount?!  Those parties make me want to bite my own fingers off in a psychotic rage.

adamar15

I actually like the pampered chef stuff, I just don't want to see 10 posts every day about hosting a party. 

LDYGTR13

And so many times folks who do direct sales of bullshit get screwed out of their own money. I've had NUMEROUS friends lose hundreds (and one over a thousand) to Mary Kay. Fuuck Mary Kay and her pink bathtub.

specialk84

Ceh, people DO that? I'd walk right out the door.

Megan+Adam

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_i-judge?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:c4a6efd4-44fc-4f53-965e-3bf900f76fbePost:b5c314f8-38be-4304-b44c-cd32cbf6993c">Re: I judge</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: I judge : I just try to be discretely out of the room and at the bar until the madness ends.
Posted by vonclancy[/QUOTE]

<div>That's usually my strategy. I'm not sure how effectively I'll be able to hide at my own reception though. That white dress will probably make it hard to blend in at the bar. </div><div>
</div><div>I think I might just let this be my one bridezilla moment and tell the band not to play any music that could cause a conga line to form. </div>

DodgersBride

LDY FI's aunt does some thing called Stamping Up. I have no idea what exactly it is but I know she makes her own greeting cards and such. She always sends email to our joint account to final sales stuff and parties that people we don't know that I am sure she doesn't know are having. She even held a Santa Making party at FIL's house. I want to say she didn't tell FIL until that day.

Anysunrise

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_i-judge?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:c4a6efd4-44fc-4f53-965e-3bf900f76fbePost:6b479bc8-5d9a-40c0-b787-becb6fa49a77">Re: I judge</a>:
[QUOTE]I would be terrible in a job where I had to sell stuff.
Posted by sparent2010[/QUOTE]

<div>It's awful. I thought it was like an optional thing where you'd just get the bonus if you did it, but no, I'm required to. It makes me angry.</div>

[Deleted User]

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_i-judge?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:c4a6efd4-44fc-4f53-965e-3bf900f76fbePost:c274e9b7-e2c0-40ad-a999-62e5c27a1d9a">Re: I judge</a>:
[QUOTE]Jeez, Bay. The "getting pregnant by trickery" routine is pretty common with H's cousins. It makes him rageful, especially when they start bitching about what a deadbeat the guy is.
Posted by specialk84[/QUOTE]
I would consider "oopsing" a man to be a form of sexual assault. Not legally, since it would be hard to proved. But I think that socially it ought to be thought of this way and the offenders ostracized accordingly.

Fluffernut

I agree, AATB, I'd be uncomfortable going to that wedding.

Bay--I feel bad for her hubby.

I judge people who don't read e-mails, reports, and posts thoroughly and then ask questions that were already addressed in the original post. 

specialk84

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_i-judge?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:c4a6efd4-44fc-4f53-965e-3bf900f76fbePost:b3d1d736-7554-4ff6-8d06-ed0d8fb50a3a">Re: I judge</a>:
[QUOTE]AATB - I would fake illness on that day. But I absolutely hate awkward situations.
Posted by rachers1017[/QUOTE]

<div>This, or just say you already have plans. I'm sure Fishy would have a beer with you. </div>

adamar15

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_i-judge?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:c4a6efd4-44fc-4f53-965e-3bf900f76fbePost:57e98e2e-bf98-4bfb-aea5-393ce2836aad">Re: I judge</a>:
[QUOTE]And so many times folks who do direct sales of bullshit get screwed out of their own money. I've had NUMEROUS friends lose hundreds (and one over a thousand) to Mary Kay. Fuuck Mary Kay and her pink bathtub.
Posted by LDYGTR13[/QUOTE]

I think the same person that's spamming with the PC stuff also lost a bunch of money doing Slumber Parties. 

[Deleted User]

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_i-judge?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:c4a6efd4-44fc-4f53-965e-3bf900f76fbePost:872753b0-5668-431b-ab08-87dd12b69bb3">Re: I judge</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: I judge : That's usually my strategy. I'm not sure how effectively I'll be able to hide at my own reception though. That white dress will probably make it hard to blend in at the bar.  I think I might just let this be my one bridezilla moment and tell the band not to play any music that could cause a conga line to form. 
Posted by Megan+Adam[/QUOTE]

Oh, I am warning my DJ that "Celebrate," "YMCA," "We Are Family," "The Chicken Dance," and any of that ridiculous or conga line forming music is forbidden.  I think if it somehow happens, the FI and I will just choose that moment to go pose for pictures or something.

Megan+Adam

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_i-judge?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:c4a6efd4-44fc-4f53-965e-3bf900f76fbePost:e7dd22cb-e7ae-41f0-9085-34511a9eab7b">Re: I judge</a>:
[QUOTE]I also judge my ex-MIL for inviting herself to a get-to-know-you dinner (FI met my ex-SIL/BIL ....they are still part of the kids' lives), telling me I'm paying for her meal, not saying thank you afterward and THEN proceeding to tell me FI will never replace her son. Trust me - he wouldn't want to.
Posted by myname1234[/QUOTE]

<div>Ugh she sounds awful.</div>

onloveonlife

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_i-judge?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:c4a6efd4-44fc-4f53-965e-3bf900f76fbePost:8d048a28-dc5e-4673-9cf0-9bfe2536515e">Re: I judge</a>:
[QUOTE]I just the wedding invitation we just got in the mail.  The reception info card says... "P.S. If you don't RSVP, bring a chair and a sandwich." I wish I was kidding.
Posted by ILoveMilkDuds[/QUOTE]

<div>Hahahaha</div>

Annas2013

I judge people who walk in lines of 3 or 4 and take up an entire sidewalk.  Especially when they walk really slow.  Mostly because I tend to walk quickly.

sparent2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_i-judge?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:c4a6efd4-44fc-4f53-965e-3bf900f76fbePost:8d048a28-dc5e-4673-9cf0-9bfe2536515e">Re: I judge</a>:
[QUOTE]I just the wedding invitation we just got in the mail.  The reception info card says... "P.S. If you don't RSVP, bring a chair and a sandwich." I wish I was kidding.
Posted by ILoveMilkDuds[/QUOTE]

Wow-

ceh789

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_i-judge?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:c4a6efd4-44fc-4f53-965e-3bf900f76fbePost:7c138252-f816-4d11-b4b5-7c899fecd26c">Re: I judge</a>:
[QUOTE]Ceh, people DO that? I'd walk right out the door.
Posted by specialk84[/QUOTE]

<div>I've heard of it once and had it happen once.  The time it happened to me it was someone from high school who posted an open invite via FB to "stop by for drinks so we can show off the new house!".  It was a Pampered Chef show.  I'm pretty sure she was trying to throw herself a housewarming shower.  I had 1 glass of wine and left.</div>

AllAboutTheBenjamin

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_i-judge?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:c4a6efd4-44fc-4f53-965e-3bf900f76fbePost:8d048a28-dc5e-4673-9cf0-9bfe2536515e">Re: I judge</a>:
[QUOTE]I just the wedding invitation we just got in the mail.  The reception info card says... "P.S. If you don't RSVP, bring a chair and a sandwich." I wish I was kidding.
Posted by ILoveMilkDuds[/QUOTE]

Oh.  My.  Hell.

baystateapple

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_i-judge?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:c4a6efd4-44fc-4f53-965e-3bf900f76fbePost:ffdd3d34-4e89-4707-97a5-67c6e804439f">Re: I judge</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: I judge : I would consider "oopsing" a man to be a form of sexual assault. Not legally, since it would be hard to proved. But I think that socially it ought to be thought of this way and the offenders ostracized accordingly.
Posted by daffodil_jill[/QUOTE]

I agree.  One of H's cousin's wives did this two years ago.  H is still pissed about it.  So is the rest of the family.  I'm sure she thought she wouldn't be caught, but H's cousin told everyone that she "pulled the goalie" (his words) on him, and it leaked all over the family.

I understand wanting a child.  I really, really wanted to be a mother by this point.  But not badly enough to do something that wretchedly stupid to someone that I claim I love.

specialk84

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_i-judge?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:c4a6efd4-44fc-4f53-965e-3bf900f76fbePost:ffdd3d34-4e89-4707-97a5-67c6e804439f">Re: I judge</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: I judge : I would consider "oopsing" a man to be a form of sexual assault. Not legally, since it would be hard to proved. But I think that socially it ought to be thought of this way and the offenders ostracized accordingly.
Posted by daffodil_jill[/QUOTE]

<div>Agreed. There are some rumors that SIL did this. I feel super terrible for saying this, but I think about it every time I see her daughter. She's also the type of woman who whines about child support, saying, "How am I supposed to raise two kids on $X?" You aren't, genius. You're supposed to provide some money, too.</div>