Opinions

KatyRoseM · April 2011

I don't think all the spouses should have to love each other. You don't have to love a man to marry him, I don't get why it should be different. If I want to be the 9th wife to some jerk, thats my choice. (In the world where this is legal, now not so much).

cupcakesfrosting · April 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_opinions-6?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:f726adca-42c1-4c91-86dd-53a5a2a089a5Post:59b407f1-238b-47ff-aac9-d71e57758839">Re: Opinions</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Opinions : I don't know that there's any way to measure or prove that though.
Posted by LessThanZero[/QUOTE]

Nope. I don't really have a card in this game though. I guess I just don't care?

My dad claims that homosexuals are against the bi-sexuals, because they won't let them marry. I don't think he fully understands what he's talking about. I have to explain to him the difference.

SarahPLiz · April 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_opinions-6?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:f726adca-42c1-4c91-86dd-53a5a2a089a5Post:a35f256b-193c-4183-92e8-2ba3e539ef3e">Re: Opinions</a>:
[QUOTE]Since we're talking about it. I'm not so sure I feel polygamy should be illegal. Who is it hurting if people want to enter into a consensual marriage that way?
Posted by Sweded[/QUOTE]

<div>I think the issue is the connection between polygamy and child sexual abuse, which seems to be linked in all of the high profile cases. Utah (and the Mormon church) doesn't want that image to be associated with them, so polygamy is outlawed. I agree that what the Browns are doing is trying to show a different face of polygamy, but I still think those wives lack self esteem and that their female children are growing up thinking that its entirely ok them not to be enough for the man they love.. that they can never have all of his love. THat sucks in my opinion, but I doubt it is child abuse. </div>

Sweded · April 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_opinions-6?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:f726adca-42c1-4c91-86dd-53a5a2a089a5Post:56c36597-ec0a-4f3a-a84c-1dc693847e30">Re: Opinions</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Opinions : I think that for it to be a legal polygamist relationship, ALL of the wives/husbands need to be in love with each other. Not just one guy decided he wanted 7 wives and they went along with it.
Posted by cupcakesfrosting[/QUOTE]

I agree, but there's no way t prove that all of the wives are in love with each other. They do, however, have to agree to allowing another woman into the relationship. I think the best way to promote that is to have all parties already involved in the marriage sign the marriage certificate and say vows at the ceremony.

Mainly, I'd like for it to be legal so that the second, third, fourth (and so on) wives would have the same rights as the first. Plus, if they're legally married the subsequent wives can't claim to be single mothers and get on state assistance under false pretenses.

pirategal03 · April 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_opinions-6?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:f726adca-42c1-4c91-86dd-53a5a2a089a5Post:c1b64d20-0940-4d21-8b18-dfcb63e4389d">Re: Opinions</a>:
[QUOTE]<strong>In Response to Re: Opinions : When I order a Diet Coke and the server says, "Is Diet Pepsi okay?" I'm always tempted to say, "Sure, if Monopoly money is okay for my bill." </strong>Opinion: It's possible to be dressed comfortably without looking like you just rolled out of bed and walked out the door in your PJs! Last term, I sat behind a bunch of girls in my criminal law class who always showed up with messy hair and pajama pants to a 3pm class. I just cannot understand why someone would wear pajamas outside the house. FSIL keeps trying to explain it to me, but I just can't wrap my head around it.
Posted by specialk84[/QUOTE]

True story:

When we're at a restaurant the convo with the waitress/waiter often begins like this:

Them: "mumbly greeting, can I get you started with something to drink?"
H: "Coke please"
Them: "Is Pepsi okay?"
H: "No. I'll have water"
Them: awkward stare

Denise91980 · April 2011

My opinion, which apparently is a popular one....KD's siggy pic is HOT! I know you all have said it, but I will say it again!

[Deleted User] · April 2011

I think they should prosecute that dude with all of the wives just because he has hair that makes him look like a diick.

cupcakesfrosting · April 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_opinions-6?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:f726adca-42c1-4c91-86dd-53a5a2a089a5Post:9e1f4df9-2722-45fb-b1ae-0bc537fa4ae8">Re: Opinions</a>:
[QUOTE]I'm not going to lie y'all, I sometimes judge based on the label thing. Not always, not even most of the time, but sometimes. If I got a labeled invite similar to what Shay described, I'd probably have a completely different reaction than I had to the one I received last month that was a crooked white label on a cream envelope with our name spelled wrong. (and yes, we're declining the invitation, although not only for the label). If I can tell that you care, then I'm not going to judge based on a label. But, I'd personally rather receive hand-written chicken scratch then most of the labeled invitations I get.
Posted by pirategal03[/QUOTE]

I totally agree with this.

I can tell everyone right now, my invites are going to be printed, labels and all. I can't afford a calligrapher, nor do I have the time/money/want to learn myself.

But I most definitely am not going to just throw the label on the envelope and hope it looks ok. I'm going to spend HOURS on them, making sure they're perfect.

KatyRoseM · April 2011

Its illegal because of the moral harms people thought it caused. Also there are arguments about what it inherently does to women. If you read the 19th wife (the book published in the 1800's or the new one) you can see the arguments they used at the time. Also at the time there was some element of treason in polygamy. Utah was settled with a plan of being independent, and a religious country. The Union was concerned with the power of the church and the differences it caused. This was also right after the civil war, when people were legitimately worried that parts of the territory claimed by the US would just up and go. By making the church conform to the rest of the US's morals the country felt more able to deal with the LDS church.

Now we focus on the abuses, but historically that wasn't all that was going on.

OBX2011 · April 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_opinions-6?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:f726adca-42c1-4c91-86dd-53a5a2a089a5Post:6958fa6e-5055-4031-8357-edad1c74cc4a">Re: Opinions</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Opinions : My opinion: Coke in a can is better that Pepsi in a can, but Pepsi in a glass bottle beats all.
Posted by anna.oskar[/QUOTE]

Im the same way with Mt Dew....it only tastes right in a can to me

K&J64 · April 2011

I agree polygamy should be legal so long as any combination of polygamy/polyandry are allowed to be married (men with multiple wives, women with multiple husbands, bisexual combinations, homosexual, etc.) and so long as no additional privileges, tax credits etc. are given to polyamorous marriages versus monogamous marriages. I care not about the love lives of other consenting adults.

Denise91980 · April 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_opinions-6?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:f726adca-42c1-4c91-86dd-53a5a2a089a5Post:2d2607ce-17ef-49a8-a77a-054130033c28">Re: Opinions</a>:
[QUOTE]I think they should prosecute that dude with all of the wives just because he has hair that makes him look like a diick.
Posted by cew515[/QUOTE]

Yeah, he does look kiinda phallic!

<a href="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/images/store/2/9/12d53400-16f3-4427-89d0-1ee22c7301b4.large.jpg" title="Click to view a larger photo" onclick="return gSiteLife.LoadForumPage('ForumImage', 'plckPhotoId', '12d53400-16f3-4427-89d0-1ee22c7301b4', 'plckRedirectUrl', gSiteLife.EscapeValue(window.location.href));" class="PhotoLink"><img src="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/images/store/2/9/12d53400-16f3-4427-89d0-1ee22c7301b4.medium.jpg" alt="" /></a>

Sweded · April 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_opinions-6?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:f726adca-42c1-4c91-86dd-53a5a2a089a5Post:099001a6-47c9-46a9-897c-0eea42fb3a4d">Re: Opinions</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Opinions : I think the issue is the connection between polygamy and child sexual abuse, which seems to be linked in all of the high profile cases. Utah (and the Mormon church) doesn't want that image to be associated with them, so polygamy is outlawed. I agree that what the Browns are doing is trying to show a different face of polygamy, but I still think those wives lack self esteem and that their female children are growing up thinking that its entirely ok them not to be enough for the man they love.. that they can never have all of his love. THat sucks in my opinion, but I doubt it is child abuse.
Posted by SarahPLiz[/QUOTE]

IMO, they should focus on the child abuse, then. That's like making drinking illegal because it sometimes leads to domestic abuse. There should be a separation of church and state, but I don't see that happening in Utah.

I don't think polygamist wives necessarily have a low self esteem. From what I understand of the religion (which, admittedly, mostly comes from "Big Love") it's not about "not being enough". They believe that they are doing the right thing by God.

KatyRoseM · April 2011

Its also about God's plan. God wanted polygamy and you should have at least 3 wives. I'm not totally sure why God is supposed to have wanted it that way, its just in the plan.

mehgank · April 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_opinions-6?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:f726adca-42c1-4c91-86dd-53a5a2a089a5Post:10111b85-294b-41c3-b67b-66230a47c4b0">Re: Opinions</a>:
[QUOTE]I agree polygamy should be legal so long as any combination of polygamy/polyandry are allowed to be married (men with multiple wives, women with multiple husbands, bisexual combinations, homosexual, etc.) and so long as no additional privileges, tax credits etc. are given to polyamorous marriages versus monogamous marriages. I care not about the love lives of other consenting adults.
Posted by kcullen37[/QUOTE]

I agree with you 100%. Amen, sister. Fair is fair, so we should apply the law to everyone, not just men who want multiple wives.

cupcakesfrosting · April 2011

I am of the opinion that if you continue to pull the woe-is-me-I'm-so-down shiit you won't have anyone left to boost you up.

Sweded · April 2011

I have another unpopular one:

I'm not convinced that prostitution should be illegal, either. I feel like if that's what a woman chooses to do with her body, let her. She is performing a service that she is expecting payment for. To me (at least on that level), it's no different than the guy who comes to cut your lawn. At least if it were legal that income could be taxed and regulations could be set to protect both the workers and their Johns (or Janes).

I am so getting flamed for this.

azdancer8 · April 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_opinions-6?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:f726adca-42c1-4c91-86dd-53a5a2a089a5Post:95d0d32f-a559-4511-8732-ded33b17adbf">Re: Opinions</a>:
[QUOTE]Its also about God's plan. God wanted polygamy and you should have at least 3 wives. I'm not totally sure why God is supposed to have wanted it that way, its just in the plan.
Posted by KatyRoseM[/QUOTE]

Huh? Is this sarcasm font? Or an argument that they actually use?

kd.joseph · April 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_opinions-6?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:f726adca-42c1-4c91-86dd-53a5a2a089a5Post:48b55285-520c-4e55-98f0-3061e79ea42f">Re: Opinions</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Opinions : Yeah, he does look kiinda phallic!
Posted by Denise91980[/QUOTE]

HA! I agree with Cew on this one.

And TY Denise, I think you are kinda Hawt yourself!

K&J64 · April 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_opinions-6?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:f726adca-42c1-4c91-86dd-53a5a2a089a5Post:2cd1f489-b6ea-4a1a-a3aa-b94d62f7abb9">Re: Opinions</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Opinions : I agree with you 100%. Amen, sister. Fair is fair, so we should apply the law to everyone, not just men who want multiple wives.
Posted by mehgank[/QUOTE]

I don't see how it could be made legal otherwise. I would have to seriously question the sanity of any female who would vote in favor of legalizing polygamy if it were just for men to take on multiple wives.

KatyRoseM · April 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_opinions-6?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:f726adca-42c1-4c91-86dd-53a5a2a089a5Post:11ea59f8-bf18-443e-a29b-bb48f6d025b1">Re: Opinions</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Opinions : Huh? Is this sarcasm font? Or an argument that they actually use?
Posted by azdancer8[/QUOTE]

No really, you need 3 wives to go to heaven. Because God planed it that way.

Sweded · April 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_opinions-6?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:f726adca-42c1-4c91-86dd-53a5a2a089a5Post:0ae1788b-19a0-43c8-a0b5-cd228eb1a168">Re: Opinions</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Opinions : I don't see how it could be made legal otherwise. I would have to seriously question the sanity of any female who would vote in favor of legalizing polygamy if it were just for men to take on multiple wives.
Posted by kcullen37[/QUOTE]

Yes, I meant from the beginning that it should be legal for anyone to marry whomever they want (polygamist OR monogamist). I don't care if it's for religious reasons or just because you're that much of a pimp. To each their own.

ETA: Someone mentioned that the daughters of these relationships learn from mothers with low self esteem. I meant to add that there are plenty of little girls out there learning how to hate themselves with just two parents.

cupcakesfrosting · April 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_opinions-6?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:f726adca-42c1-4c91-86dd-53a5a2a089a5Post:91bec8e5-c07f-4ad7-b9e9-26f3a19c57f1">Re: Opinions</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Opinions : No really, you need 3 wives to go to heaven. Because God planed it that way.
Posted by KatyRoseM[/QUOTE]

So, are you one of three?

K&J64 · April 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_opinions-6?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:f726adca-42c1-4c91-86dd-53a5a2a089a5Post:b3e8576d-b6c1-400c-becd-b7090f22fd00">Re: Opinions</a>:
[QUOTE]I have another unpopular one: I'm not convinced that prostitution should be illegal, either. I feel like if that's what a woman chooses to do with her body, let her. She is performing a service that she is expecting payment for. To me (at least on that level), it's no different than the guy who comes to cut your lawn. At least if it were legal that income could be taxed and regulations could be set to protect both the workers and their Johns (or Janes). I am so getting flamed for this.
Posted by Sweded[/QUOTE]

No flame from me, I agree. It's legal in Vegas, and the hookers there are disease free (the ones working in legal brothels that is). If someone wants to/has to pay for sex and someone else want to enlist in the oldest profession, have at it.

I think, in general, Americans need to stop being such Puritans and lighten up when it comes to sex and marriage.

KatyRoseM · April 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_opinions-6?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:f726adca-42c1-4c91-86dd-53a5a2a089a5Post:8ec64b8a-cf19-40b1-b714-b8a17017b597">Re: Opinions</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Opinions : So, are you one of three?
Posted by cupcakesfrosting[/QUOTE]

:) nope, I'm not LDS, or FLDS, I'm Jewish. If they are right I'm so going to hell. Of course, if a decedent converts I get out, so that's ok.

pirategal03 · April 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_opinions-6?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:f726adca-42c1-4c91-86dd-53a5a2a089a5Post:b3e8576d-b6c1-400c-becd-b7090f22fd00">Re: Opinions</a>:
[QUOTE]I have another unpopular one: I'm not convinced that prostitution should be illegal, either. I feel like if that's what a woman chooses to do with her body, let her. She is performing a service that she is expecting payment for. To me (at least on that level), it's no different than the guy who comes to cut your lawn. At least if it were legal that income could be taxed and regulations could be set to protect both the workers and their Johns (or Janes). I am so getting flamed for this.
Posted by Sweded[/QUOTE]

No flames here. I think prostitution should be legalized, unionized, regulated, zoned and taxed.

cupcakesfrosting · April 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_opinions-6?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:f726adca-42c1-4c91-86dd-53a5a2a089a5Post:9ab2fd6d-cd27-45b7-aabe-311b6b51d396">Re: Opinions</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Opinions : No flames here. I think prostitution should be legalized, unionized, regulated, zoned and taxed.
Posted by pirategal03[/QUOTE]

Yup.

Sweded · April 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_opinions-6?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:f726adca-42c1-4c91-86dd-53a5a2a089a5Post:58ea930c-8f77-4585-a302-cccec50baf8d">Re: Opinions</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Opinions : No flame from me, I agree. It's legal in Vegas, and the hookers there are disease free (the ones working in legal brothels that is). If someone wants to/has to pay for sex and someone else want to enlist in the oldest profession, have at it. I think, in general, Americans need to stop being such Puritans and lighten up when it comes to sex and marriage.
Posted by kcullen37[/QUOTE]

Amen. I think too many laws are based on moral convictions stemming from religion. As I have said before, there is supposed to be a separation of church and state in this country. It may not be directly linked, but I can't think of one reason that prostitution should be illegal that doesn't come back to morality vs. posing an actual danger to our society.

NatesGirl16 · April 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_opinions-6?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:f726adca-42c1-4c91-86dd-53a5a2a089a5Post:9ab2fd6d-cd27-45b7-aabe-311b6b51d396">Re: Opinions</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Opinions : No flames here. I think prostitution should be legalized, unionized, regulated, zoned and taxed.
Posted by pirategal03[/QUOTE]

Taxed to high hell, yup. Let's make some money off this bitch, for real.

Sweded · April 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_opinions-6?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:f726adca-42c1-4c91-86dd-53a5a2a089a5Post:1b89f840-35ae-4b53-9702-1329f687eb4e">Re: Opinions</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Opinions : There's a country in Africa, for life of me I can't remember which right now, where when a man gets married he has to decide then and there whether to be polygamous or monogamous and stick to it. I like that idea, even better if it's put into place where both have to agree. I think if the guy changes his mind from monogamous to polygamous, the husband and wife must both face a judge to say that they're ok with it. I want to say it's Senegal.
Posted by rhonwynv[/QUOTE]

I like that idea, too. It stops a guy from getting bored and just picking up another wife because he's too lazy to get a divorce.

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