Hey! I was gone all weekend+ at a DW where I didn't get any of the good cake (i.e. chocolate. mine had kiwi or some shit in it. IDK) and there was a cash bar and a shower where everyone had to pay for their own meal without warning.
And yesterday I smashed a spider and it exploded into a bazillion baby spiders. I did not think that was a thing that could happen and now I have trust issues.
I would also like some 7 layer dip.
@lolo883 let's talk about something that doesn't make my skin crawl. How about a post about the shit show wedding?
"I'm not a rude bitch. I'm ten rude bitches in a large coat."
Hey! I was gone all weekend+ at a DW where I didn't get any of the good cake (i.e. chocolate. mine had kiwi or some shit in it. IDK) and there was a cash bar and a shower where everyone had to pay for their own meal without warning.
And yesterday I smashed a spider and it exploded into a bazillion baby spiders. I did not think that was a thing that could happen and now I have trust issues.
I would also like some 7 layer dip.
So what you're saying is you burned down your house and now need a place to live/somewhere to hide until the heat dies down as you're wanted for arson?
We've got a guest bedroom and guacamole. If you're interested.
I'll be on the next flight.
Thankfully the spiderpocalypse was in the garage, not the house proper. Otherwise yes, I would have burninated it.
Hey! I was gone all weekend+ at a DW where I didn't get any of the good cake (i.e. chocolate. mine had kiwi or some shit in it. IDK) and there was a cash bar and a shower where everyone had to pay for their own meal without warning.
And yesterday I smashed a spider and it exploded into a bazillion baby spiders. I did not think that was a thing that could happen and now I have trust issues.
I would also like some 7 layer dip.
So what you're saying is you burned down your house and now need a place to live/somewhere to hide until the heat dies down as you're wanted for arson?
We've got a guest bedroom and guacamole. If you're interested.
I'll be on the next flight.
Thankfully the spiderpocalypse was in the garage, not the house proper. Otherwise yes, I would have burninated it.
Oh so you just burned down the garage. Garages aren't necessary.
Hey! I was gone all weekend+ at a DW where I didn't get any of the good cake (i.e. chocolate. mine had kiwi or some shit in it. IDK) and there was a cash bar and a shower where everyone had to pay for their own meal without warning.
And yesterday I smashed a spider and it exploded into a bazillion baby spiders. I did not think that was a thing that could happen and now I have trust issues.
I would also like some 7 layer dip.
So what you're saying is you burned down your house and now need a place to live/somewhere to hide until the heat dies down as you're wanted for arson?
We've got a guest bedroom and guacamole. If you're interested.
Burning down a house because of a baby spider infestation should be legal.
Hey! I was gone all weekend+ at a DW where I didn't get any of the good cake (i.e. chocolate. mine had kiwi or some shit in it. IDK) and there was a cash bar and a shower where everyone had to pay for their own meal without warning.
And yesterday I smashed a spider and it exploded into a bazillion baby spiders. I did not think that was a thing that could happen and now I have trust issues.
I would also like some 7 layer dip.
@lolo883 let's talk about something that doesn't make my skin crawl. How about a post about the shit show wedding?
Yes, please. I have an old dresser downstairs that I was going to start sanding, and I just frightened myself out of going into my own basement.
Hey! There's trogdor the burninator up there! I love him!
JCbride2015 said:
lolo883 said:
Hey! I was gone all weekend+ at a DW where I didn't get any of the good cake (i.e. chocolate. mine had kiwi or some shit in it. IDK) and there was a cash bar and a shower where everyone had to pay for their own meal without warning. And yesterday I smashed a spider and it exploded into a bazillion baby spiders. I did not think that was a thing that could happen and now I have trust issues. I would also like some 7 layer dip.
@lolo883 let's talk about something that doesn't make my skin crawl. How about a post about the shit show wedding?
- - - Where's the box? - - -
So. The whole thing was not a shit show. AKA I love my friend dearly and don't want to snark on her TOO MUCH, especially on things that are out of her control. HOWEVER.
DW, a few hours from her hometown and several states away from where the couple (and her MOH) now live. Rather than throwing a smaller shower in their current state, the MOH invited all wedding guests to one in the wedding city 2 days before the wedding. So we all had to travel with gifts. Then when the waitress was taking drink orders, she said "separate checks, then?" to which the MOH nodded emphatically "yes." Oh, well ok then. It was a buffet restaurant, so nobody even had the chance to order anything less expensive if they hadn't anticipated paying their own way.
Invitations, which were not formal in appearance, dictated formal attire. She later informed us this was "just so nobody wears jeans." Super duper.
FB IMed all the guests, and put note in the program, about "being there with us" and not taking pictures. Widely ignored at the ceremony, including one guy who recorded the whole thing on his phone with the flash/spotlight on.
She didn't have much of a backup plan in case of rain, and rain it did. All day long. Moved the ceremony to a gazebo, but we all still had to walk through the rain to get to it. Not a long walk; no longer than the walk in from the parking lot, but still a walk in the rain. I was actually super impressed with her composure as we watched the storm forecast and tornado warnings all day.
Head table so I didn't get to sit with my honey. And one of the guests moved the place cards around so the other BM's husband got stuck with total strangers, rather than the other WP SO's and parents.
Partial cash bar, which I don't think anyone actually used. The bartenders would even make suggestions like "are you sure you want Jack and Coke? the Jim is free" to get people around having to pay. Giant bowl for tips which I ignored.
The bouquet toss got stuck in the chandelier. The MOH climbed onto the BM's shoulders to retrieve it and it was hilarious.
When I first moved in with H, I saw a spider that looked kinda black widow ish. So, like an idiot, even though I only moved all of 30 miles, I googled "poisonous spiders in Northern Maryland"
I hate all of you for this spider talk.
When I first moved in with H, I saw a spider that looked kinda black widow ish. So, like an idiot, even though I only moved all of 30 miles, I googled "poisonous spiders in Northern Maryland"
I didn't sleep that night.
Hey! I was gone all weekend+ at a DW where I didn't get any of the good cake (i.e. chocolate. mine had kiwi or some shit in it. IDK) and there was a cash bar and a shower where everyone had to pay for their own meal without warning.
And yesterday I smashed a spider and it exploded into a bazillion baby spiders. I did not think that was a thing that could happen and now I have trust issues.
I would also like some 7 layer dip.
So what you're saying is you burned down your house and now need a place to live/somewhere to hide until the heat dies down as you're wanted for arson?
We've got a guest bedroom and guacamole. If you're interested.
I'll be on the next flight.
Thankfully the spiderpocalypse was in the garage, not the house proper. Otherwise yes, I would have burninated it.
@lolo883 I honestly was not aware that it was possible to love you more, and you bring up Trogdor.
Hey! I was gone all weekend+ at a DW where I didn't get any of the good cake (i.e. chocolate. mine had kiwi or some shit in it. IDK) and there was a cash bar and a shower where everyone had to pay for their own meal without warning.
And yesterday I smashed a spider and it exploded into a bazillion baby spiders. I did not think that was a thing that could happen and now I have trust issues.
I would also like some 7 layer dip.
So what you're saying is you burned down your house and now need a place to live/somewhere to hide until the heat dies down as you're wanted for arson?
We've got a guest bedroom and guacamole. If you're interested.
I'll be on the next flight.
Thankfully the spiderpocalypse was in the garage, not the house proper. Otherwise yes, I would have burninated it.
@lolo883 I honestly was not aware that it was possible to love you more, and you bring up Trogdor.
Hey! I was gone all weekend+ at a DW where I didn't get any of the good cake (i.e. chocolate. mine had kiwi or some shit in it. IDK) and there was a cash bar and a shower where everyone had to pay for their own meal without warning.
And yesterday I smashed a spider and it exploded into a bazillion baby spiders. I did not think that was a thing that could happen and now I have trust issues.
I would also like some 7 layer dip.
So what you're saying is you burned down your house and now need a place to live/somewhere to hide until the heat dies down as you're wanted for arson?
We've got a guest bedroom and guacamole. If you're interested.
I'll be on the next flight.
Thankfully the spiderpocalypse was in the garage, not the house proper. Otherwise yes, I would have burninated it.
Garages are fucking evil. I got my first scorpion sting in a garage. And my second. My third was out hiking. I've learned to avoid garages and also the outdoors.
I once had a spider crawl across my pillow while I was laying in bed.
and then I moved out.
I used to tell people that famed makeup model Nikki Taylor saved me from a spider once.
I was reading a magazine and a spider was breakdancing on my arm, so I slapped the shit out of it with the magazine. Nikki Taylor was on a CoverGirl ad on the back. Thanks Nikki Taylor.
I'm not afraid of spiders but I can't kill them. When I was little my babysitter told me that is was unlucky to kill spiders and ever since then it is the back of my head that if I kill a spider something bad will happen.
If bugs come in my house I cover them with paper cups or bowls and let H deal with them when he gets home.
One time I went to do some laundry in my basement and I noticed a huge wolf spider. H had just left to go eat dinner with friends. I called him and begged him to come home and kill it. He said he would be home soon and will deal with it then. I proceeded to sit and watch that spider in my cold unfinished basement until he got home. No way was I going to let it out of my sight because if it disappeared I was never going to go down to the basement again.
Hey! I was gone all weekend+ at a DW where I didn't get any of the good cake (i.e. chocolate. mine had kiwi or some shit in it. IDK) and there was a cash bar and a shower where everyone had to pay for their own meal without warning.
And yesterday I smashed a spider and it exploded into a bazillion baby spiders. I did not think that was a thing that could happen and now I have trust issues.
I would also like some 7 layer dip.
Just gonna jump in here, but I did not either! WORST.THING.EVER!
I once had a spider crawl across my pillow while I was laying in bed.
and then I moved out.
I used to tell people that famed makeup model Nikki Taylor saved me from a spider once.
I was reading a magazine and a spider was breakdancing on my arm, so I slapped the shit out of it with the magazine. Nikki Taylor was on a CoverGirl ad on the back. Thanks Nikki Taylor.
My cats caught a mouse and were only toying with it and wouldn't finish the job.
I did this:
A couple weeks ago I came home and was going to water the little seedlings I had in the window and found a brown furry bat taking a siesta amongst my baby vegetable plants.
The following is the text message that FI promptly received, "Holy ******* ****there is a ******* bat in the house!!! When will you be home?!?!?!" He replied with, "You know, it's been a long hot day so I think I'll stop for an ice cold beer at the bar."
If bugs come in my house I cover them with paper cups or bowls and let H deal with them when he gets home.
One time I went to do some laundry in my basement and I noticed a huge wolf spider. H had just left to go eat dinner with friends. I called him and begged him to come home and kill it. He said he would be home soon and will deal with it then. I proceeded to sit and watch that spider in my cold unfinished basement until he got home. No way was I going to let it out of my sight because if it disappeared I was never going to go down to the basement again.
We used to have a little portable bug zapper thing - it looked like a badminton racket but was electric. I LOVED it. I found a GIANT spider at the bottom of the stairs and FI was like an hour away. It took me a long time to get the courage to zap this guy. So I zap him and go upstairs and check every few minutes to make sure the corpse is still there. After like 10 minutes, it's gone. GONE. So I go down there with a broom and start moving shoes around and there he is - giant zombie spider. Moving all slow, dragging a few of his legs. Terrifying. I put a cup over him and sit there and watch him until FI got home.
I miss my bug zapper, even though it created a monster.
If bugs come in my house I cover them with paper cups or bowls and let H deal with them when he gets home.
One time I went to do some laundry in my basement and I noticed a huge wolf spider. H had just left to go eat dinner with friends. I called him and begged him to come home and kill it. He said he would be home soon and will deal with it then. I proceeded to sit and watch that spider in my cold unfinished basement until he got home. No way was I going to let it out of my sight because if it disappeared I was never going to go down to the basement again.
Fi's friend's wife puts cups over spiders. He got home from a golf weekend once, and there were cups all over the fucking house. Anything that crawled got a cup.
Good thing they hadn't had their kids yet.
My cats caught a mouse and were only toying with it and wouldn't finish the job.
I did this:
A couple weeks ago I came home and was going to water the little seedlings I had in the window and found a brown furry bat taking a siesta amongst my baby vegetable plants.
The following is the text message that FI promptly received, "Holy ******* ****there is a ******* bat in the house!!! When will you be home?!?!?!" He replied with, "You know, it's been a long hot day so I think I'll stop for an ice cold beer at the bar."
I cant' share my reply.
Oh gosh. All I can think about is Stellaluna. What did you do with the bat? You could probably just wrap it in a towel and bring it outside, right?
I guess my real question is how the fuck a BAT got inside your house. Whoa.
"I'm not a rude bitch. I'm ten rude bitches in a large coat."
If bugs come in my house I cover them with paper cups or bowls and let H deal with them when he gets home.
One time I went to do some laundry in my basement and I noticed a huge wolf spider. H had just left to go eat dinner with friends. I called him and begged him to come home and kill it. He said he would be home soon and will deal with it then. I proceeded to sit and watch that spider in my cold unfinished basement until he got home. No way was I going to let it out of my sight because if it disappeared I was never going to go down to the basement again.
We used to have a little portable bug zapper thing - it looked like a badminton racket but was electric. I LOVED it. I found a GIANT spider at the bottom of the stairs and FI was like an hour away. It took me a long time to get the courage to zap this guy. So I zap him and go upstairs and check every few minutes to make sure the corpse is still there. After like 10 minutes, it's gone. GONE. So I go down there with a broom and start moving shoes around and there he is - giant zombie spider. Moving all slow, dragging a few of his legs. Terrifying. I put a cup over him and sit there and watch him until FI got home.
I miss my bug zapper, even though it created a monster.
I don't like spiders but I can get close enough to kill it.
Snakes on the other hand, I have deep issues with snakes. My dad is terridied and it rubbed off on me I think. I stepped on a snake coming home from church to change for the church lunch. It didn't bite me but I thought it was an anaconda (I was 4) so I screamed. The entire church was there in 2.5 seconds. Another time I saw a snake fall off the ledge of a door when my cousin opened it and drape around her neck. Most significant memory was when FI and I were packing for a camping trip in his parents' house. I was going back and forth between rooms putting stuff together. Then I saw it. It was a snack just chilling on the window sill. Scarred for life.
My cat also torture mice and I always feel so bad because they look helpless. Then I remember they trespassed in my house, haha.
My cats caught a mouse and were only toying with it and wouldn't finish the job.
I did this:
A couple weeks ago I came home and was going to water the little seedlings I had in the window and found a brown furry bat taking a siesta amongst my baby vegetable plants.
The following is the text message that FI promptly received, "Holy ******* ****there is a ******* bat in the house!!! When will you be home?!?!?!" He replied with, "You know, it's been a long hot day so I think I'll stop for an ice cold beer at the bar."
I cant' share my reply.
Oh gosh. All I can think about is Stellaluna. What did you do with the bat? You could probably just wrap it in a towel and bring it outside, right?
I guess my real question is how the fuck a BAT got inside your house. Whoa.
Bats are good at squeezing into little spaces. I've had a couple of bats get in the house we used to live in. Oddly enough the thing that saved from getting them repeatedly was buying a bat house and hanging it in the tree in our back yard. It gave the bats somewhere more appealing to go then our screened in porch.
Shit last week, I was picking up some yoga pants off the floor to wear and there was a TINY spider on them, dropped them on the floor and went and got a new pair..nope nope nope.
@emmaaa I can't kill the mice when they get in my house. I had a full on sobfest one night when I saw a mouse run on to the glue trap FI had set out. Inconsolable. I hate the fact that they're in my living space but I can't kill them either. I just pray that I never see the mouse again and hope that it makes its way out of my house on its own.
Re: There are people missing.
And yesterday I smashed a spider and it exploded into a bazillion baby spiders. I did not think that was a thing that could happen and now I have trust issues.
I would also like some 7 layer dip. @lolo883 let's talk about something that doesn't make my skin crawl. How about a post about the shit show wedding? - - - Where's the box? - - - So. The whole thing was not a shit show. AKA I love my friend dearly and don't want to snark on her TOO MUCH, especially on things that are out of her control. HOWEVER.
When I first moved in with H, I saw a spider that looked kinda black widow ish. So, like an idiot, even though I only moved all of 30 miles, I googled "poisonous spiders in Northern Maryland"
I didn't sleep that night.
I'm the fuck out.
I was reading a magazine and a spider was breakdancing on my arm, so I slapped the shit out of it with the magazine. Nikki Taylor was on a CoverGirl ad on the back. Thanks Nikki Taylor.
I'm the fuck out.
Oh my gosh. Hahaha
But still.
I'm the fuck out.
I'm the fuck out.
Bats are good at squeezing into little spaces. I've had a couple of bats get in the house we used to live in. Oddly enough the thing that saved from getting them repeatedly was buying a bat house and hanging it in the tree in our back yard. It gave the bats somewhere more appealing to go then our screened in porch.