Snarky Brides

Why are some people weird about babies and weddings?

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Re: Why are some people weird about babies and weddings?

  • edited May 2010
    Love this thread:-).

    Although I do want kids at some point in life, in general I am not a "kid" person.  However, my FI and I are okay with having kids at our wedding.  Kids are a part of life, and many of my friends and a lot of our relatives (especially on my side) have young babies and toddlers.  If you're around kids enough (and again since I have friends with kids I find myself around kids quite a bit), you learn to accept their cuteness and tune out their annoyingness.  Also, considering that much of my family is coming from OOT (5-6 hours away), that's a lot to expect of them to leave their young kids behind for days at a time, even if they do have babysitters.  If we had a "no kid" rule, hardly anyone in my family would show up.  I'm planning to have some activities for the toddlers and young kids (since the wedding and reception are outdoors on a farm, it gives us a lot of leeway in terms of planning "out the box" and being somewhat informal). It will give them something to do so their parents won't have as hard a time entertaining them.

    And pregnant BMs...not too worried about it...none of my BMs are in relationships (although things do happen)...my MOH (sister) swears off kids and my other BMs are pretty conservative.  But even if it did come up, I can't imagine freaking out over it, especially for vanity reasons.  My only concern would be that they wouldn't be able to make it to the wedding, but I would understand if they were pregnant and didn't want to (or couldn't) make the trip.
  • This thread needs to die.


  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_people-weird-babies-weddings?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:d2e8a745-99c8-4da6-8eda-8f37ee4395a7Post:55fb2419-df7b-4165-8137-4217c50f6d50">Re: Why are some people weird about babies and weddings?</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Why are some people weird about babies and weddings? : It probably had more to do with the fact that 6 year olds are ephing annoying.. Don't assume everything is about vanity and a lustful need for attention. Some people just really don't like children. 
    Posted by jamjar11[/QUOTE]

    Bahahaha couldn't agree more. I don't want kids at my wedding just because they kind of gross me out.
  • My second cousin was a baby when my parents got married and screamed at the top of his lungs throughout their entire ceremony.  My one grandma has still never forgiven the kid and my parents have been married 36 years!  Grandma is quite adement that I shouldn't allow children at my wedding, but I'm going to respectfully disagree.  If you have people coming from out of town, what do you expect them to do with their kids for the weekend?  Also, for my parent's wedding, the problem wasn't that my cousin screamed, it was that my aunt and uncle didn't take him out of the church.  I love kids, they are a part of family and a part of life and should be at a wedding.  The parents just need to take responsibility for them and respect the seriousness of the wedding ceremony.  Another thing that is great about kids at weddings is that they have no shame getting out on the dance floor and being ridiculous.
  • The pubic hair and laser-eye posts completely upstaged my intended projectile-vomiting post.

    I humbly bow in wit defeat.

    We're just two lost souls swimmin' in a fish bowl, year after year
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_people-weird-babies-weddings?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:d2e8a745-99c8-4da6-8eda-8f37ee4395a7Post:6d27a799-bcf5-4f83-866b-5f1a587ce927">Re: Why are some people weird about babies and weddings?</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Why are some people weird about babies and weddings? : Yeah. That's same reason why I didn't invite a bunch of pubic hairs to mine.
    Posted by cew515[/QUOTE]

    Can you include waxing gift certificates in your invitations, or would that be considered tacky?
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_people-weird-babies-weddings?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:d2e8a745-99c8-4da6-8eda-8f37ee4395a7Post:1d396147-6b37-4b9c-b503-24347fc18609">Re: Why are some people weird about babies and weddings?</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Why are some people weird about babies and weddings? : Can you include waxing gift certificates in your invitations, or would that be considered tacky?
    Posted by christyran1228[/QUOTE]

    Yes because it would imply that they already had pubic hair.
  • Crying babies do not equal romance to me...
    I am having children at my wedding but I do hope if a baby starts crying or a child starts acting up the parents have enough decency to leave until they have calmed down.

  • I love kids and am definitely inviting all nieces and nephews to the wedding - we'll have three one-and-a-half year olds there along with two three year olds, and I'm excited to see them all.  Pregnant bridesmaids also don't bother me in the least - however, I am a bit concerned about one of my bridesmaids getting pregnant and then not being able to attend if she's too far along because she's out of town.  I know that's a bit self-centered and I'll be thrilled for her if that happens (I know she loves kids) but it would be a bummer for her to miss the day.
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  • kkidd28kkidd28 member
    Ninth Anniversary 100 Comments

    One of my bridesmaids found out last week that she is 2 months pregnant!  I was really excited...till she said - I'm gonna have to get a new dress!  Mine won't fit.  Turns out since this is she & hubby's 3rd child, she's already showing and I am now begging Alfred Angelo to take the dress back and let her get a maternity dress in a different style...So its not the baby I'm not excited about. Its the begging I'm having to do cause she's having to buy a 2nd dress.....

    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_people-weird-babies-weddings?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:d2e8a745-99c8-4da6-8eda-8f37ee4395a7Post:e86aa280-7051-4771-bb39-fc0f73e24531">Re: Why are some people weird about babies and weddings?</a>:
    [QUOTE]Crying babies do not equal romance to me... I am having children at my wedding but I do hope if a baby starts crying or a child starts acting up the parents have enough decency to leave until they have calmed down.
    Posted by superheroprincess[/QUOTE]

    <div>Its never safe to assume people have any decency.</div>
    April 2011 November Siggy: Venue Photobucket Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • So far our tally is 175 adults and 12 kids <8.  If 175 adults can't handle 12 kids, then I think we have bigger issues to deal with!  But seriously, all but 2 are very well behaved, and even the 2 bad ones aren't so awful that they can't be out in public. 

    My MOH plans to move to Boston to marry her girlfriend within the next 2 years, and she told me I wasn't allowed to be pregnant because no fat people were going to be in their wedding.  I told her she needed to hurry up and get married then because I plan on getting pregnant within the next 2-3 years!  (I told my FI he has until I'm 25, and I just turned 23.)  So too bad for her lol :)
  • My best friend will be 7 months prego in our wedding! I can't wait! It's her first child and it makes me want to cry when I think about it. I am honored that she is still making the 1,500 mile journey to be in my wedding and I can't imagine it without her! Plus, we're going to be able to look at these pictures in 20 years and see the beginning of her family. I'm personally so excited to have her big belly in all of our wedding pix!
  • My sister's one of my BM's and she'll be 8 months pregnant! My only concern is for her to be as comfortable as possible on my wedding day! She asked me 100 times if I minded that she was in my bridal party but with 250 guests, if I can get some attention off of me? PERFECT! hahahaha I'm really excited and yes, some people don't want babies or children even at their wedding.  I say, grow up! :) Who cares if a baby starts crying, have a little patience! So, I agree with you, I don't know why pople have issues, but some do!

    Lazers...hahahahhahaa
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  • I am so glad I came across this board!!

    Ok...I thought my brother was nuts about not having kids at the wedding.  They had a very upscale event, and yes some of our family threw fits.  My wedding is not going to be as elaborate - just not my style....however, going to a cousin's wedding with all the family AND all the kids....yikes!

    First...some of our family just let the kids run around - UNATTENDED.  Fingers were in the cake before the bride and groom got to see it!  Favors were all over the place, they were running around knocking into people etc.

    I just don't know what to do!  We can't invite some kids and not others....I would be fine if the parents tended to their kids - took them out of the cermony if they are fussy.  The kids that are old and should no better the parents left unattended at the cousin's wedding and with all the effort and energy, I don't know if I want all the kids around.

    Not sure if it would be ok to say come to the ceremony but not reception and pay for some baby sitters, have a pizza party etc??  I know when I was a kid I went ton ONE wedding with my parents because my uncle requested us to attend...aside from that all other weddings my parents left us as home...

    what to do...so lost!
    imageimage

    Sept 2011 Siggy Challenge: Favorite Ceremony Photo Anniversary

    ~~Planning~~


    ~~FOR SALE~~
  • I don't mind kids at the wedding.  And I don't know if I'd mind an older baby, say 5 or 6 months old.  My brother and his wife are having their baby just mere weeks before my wedding.  I'm not sure I'd love for them to bring their baby.  Only because this is the one time in my life that people will have the chance to focus on me and my fiance.  And if they bring their brand new baby, the focus will be on the baby. 

    I already have a shower that is more about my sister-in-law than about me.  I'd like my wedding to NOT be the same!
  • In response with: "I'm one of those no babies at weddings type of person...." Posted by landra310sPosted by landra310s

    A whiney, loud child just drives me nuts. I am a wedding photojournalist and I have been to a lot of weddings and I don't understand how someone just lets their child or baby disrupt the ceremony, they make crying rooms for a reason. My fiancee's family has a lot of kids and he nixed the idea of no kids so if they are family they may bring their children but we have suites reserved at the hotel (reception is there) where there will be sitters and the parents can leave their kids in one of those rooms. 
    I am asking that any in town guest who is not family not bring their child. I don't want kids running around at my reception causing unwanted distractions, loudness or even injuries when they slip on the dance floor. Parents can't have a good time watching their kid the whole time. I want all of my guests to have a blast! and that is why I don't want kids there.

    But if a BM was preggers I don't care about that. Just as long as she can have someone take care of it during appropriate times.
  • Younger kids may be cute, but if the wedding is later in the day that is when kids get cranky and start to whine or scream.. VERY LOUDY! Babysitters were invented for that reason.. so mom and dad can go have fun while the kiddys are asleep.. at home!
    I am asking for kids under 5 to be left home.. it may be mean, but i dont want a screaming baby interupting our ceremony!
  • Because a wedding is a SACRED ceremony and it's not a place for children. And, I went to my best friend wedding a months ago and some lady had her baby in there and that baby screamed and cried during the entire ceremony and the mother did NOT get up and take the baby out of the church. All you could hear in her wedding video was a screaming baby...It's because of rude people like that. That's why babies should not be allowed at weddings.
  • I said no children under 5 years old were allowed at the wedding and I provided a nusery.
  • If one of my bridesmaids were pregnant I'd be thrilled!  As long as they were comfortable in the dress I think all would be fine!  What I don't like is babies at the wedding.  I agree totally that a crying baby while you are expressing your eternal love is inappropriate.  I have a big problem through my soon to be sister in law is pregnant and will have a 2 months old by our wedding.  I don't mind the baby at the reception, but at the church no way!  My future mother in law already informed me the baby would be there.  The kids in this family are not disciplined and my FI nephew's are unruly and I'm scared to death how they will behave ( they are are ring bearers) now add a new born to the mix...can I get a break!  PS I have a could friend who's daughter I'm close to that I don't mind her bringing either because i know she will step out if Maddie gets cranky.
  • I actually have a prego BM!  She found out after I asked her and people looked at me like i was going to cancel her and find someone else!!! I think the reason people do this is simply because a pregenant bridesmaid is not the picture perfect ideal, but bridesmaids come in all sizes and shapes and they are prego not a monster.  My cousin looks really nice in her maternity dress for our wedding in a couple of weeks.  Now if you are a 'zilla and want skinny minny picture perfect bridesmaids then maybe that would be an issue, but there are ways to still get great photos without drawing attention to a prego belly (if you have a good photographer)
  • Well if you are ok with kids at the cermony but not the reception, you could set up a kids only area away from everything else and have hire babysitters to look after the kids.. dont know if the parents would be cool with that.. but its an idea..
  • vtbd26vtbd26 member
    First Comment
    my moh is due 5 weeks befor the wedding:) i think i will be grate to have a new life at my wedding and if it starts to cry well dady can step out side and all the kids will be gone by 9pm at my wedding:) babys should be a good thing but some ppl think it will take a way from the bride, the way i see if you feel that way you need to read more self help books and find out why .
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • Some of our close friends (they are both in our wedding) just had a baby a few days ago.  She will be 5 months old by the time we get married.  I'm not sure if they're planning to bring her to the wedding, but I wouldn't be upset if they did.  We all grew up together, so we're inviting a lot of our friend's parents to the wedding as well.  I'm sure any of them would be thrilled to watch the baby during the ceremony/leave if the baby started crying.

    Plus, if we had a no kids policy, then we would have like 5 people at the wedding because so many people in our family have kids and everyone who would watch them will be attending the wedding.

  • I work as a bridal consultant, and let me tell you: I've seen a LOT of brides annoyed with pregnant wedding party members. It can be hard to find them dresses, hard to plan what the dresses will look like, and sometimes, if the wedding is close to the due date, hard to plan if the bridesmaid will even be there. STILL, I don't think any of that warrants getting upset about something you can't control. Besides, babies are exciting!

    Yet, I must admit, it was actually a pretty hard decision for my fiance and I to decide on no kids under 16 at the wedding. I really love all my small cousins, and some people are coming from pretty far away. For us, though, it was a monetary issue. We simply couldn't afford to feed an extra 15 people. Additionally, when I mentioned the "kidless" idea to someone, she practically jumped for joy at the chance for a day out without her child (this actually surprised me, because I was banking on everyone hating me).

  • sboldonsboldon member
    First Comment
    edited May 2010
    We are having babies and toddlers at our wedding. I am thinking about putting an FYI in on the back page of our ceremony program that will refer to the church's nursery location.
  • I took my daghter to 3 weddings in the first 6 weeks of her life.  I missed the first two ceremonie because I had to step out with the fussy darling.  She didn't attend the receptions because family wanted to babysit.  The 3rd ceremony she was quiet and at the reception she was held by everyone else, except when I needed to feed her.

    My wedding will allow kids since only about 10% of the guests live where we do.We don't want to keep people away because they can't find overnight care for their children.  Besides, I would feel funny having my little one there, she will be 9 mo., and not allow others.
  • One time, this space ship showed up in the front lawn and when I went out to see what it was doing there, they abducted me and got me pregnant with their space babies. When I gave birth to the space babies, they were all dressed like little brides. It was creepy as hell.
  • We will have absolutely NO kids! I am not paying $75 a head to have a little tyke run around while his parents drink wine I paid for! We are hiring a babysitter. Plus, we're have a late, formal wedding on Bourbon St. in New Orleans.
    image
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