Wedding Etiquette Forum

game? you might judge me for this but...?

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Re: game? you might judge me for this but...?

  • I've slipped back into full-fledged bulimia OMG....
  • I confess that I continued to lurk on this thread just to see what GoHeels would say. I thought it was going to be much, much worse than what it was. I am not over either of my ex relationships. I don't have feelings for either of them anymore, but the hurt and insecurities are most definitely there still. FI has no idea how much I think about the past. My boobs are very uneven and I hate hate hate it. I don't want FI to touch either of them or look at me. And I hate how my wedding dress, as well as pretty much all my clothes, look because of this. I am willing to go into debt to fix it. I haven't worked since I finished my bachelor's in July because I am marrying FI and after the wedding we are moving to Arkansas (he is in the Air Force). I literally do nothing all day but watch TV and plan my wedding. I am scared that I have become so lazy that working again will be a struggle. I feel much better after writing this out.
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  • Rach, scarlet, coco - I'm glad I'm not the only one. I try not to take it personally in threads like this where people are posting like 5 paragraphs every second. But other times it can feel crappy. And I'm not on here enough to really make a difference in the situation either, so it's like why bother? Then I'm like, jebus, it's just a wedding forum, get over it! Oh well, I'll just keep doing what I'm doing with you ladies.



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    Taco cat: Always a palindrome. ALWAYS, okay J&K?

    "cool......insult my size 2 body or my natural brown hair...or the fact that my parents own a country club, I have no budget for a wedding, and I have horses. I really dont care. Its better then having roots." ~ futurepivko
  • Brie--I applaud you so much--for running, and working out, and doing all the things I wish I had the desire to do. And you look fabulous. And Kati--I'm scared for you to hear that. Please go to a doc. Please?!
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  • Kati!! :((( That makes me very upset.
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  • I'm really sorry to hear that Kati.  I realize you know it, but you really should go see a doctor.  You look great (HOT) in all your sig pics - you deserve health, too.
  • MariahCongratulations on your first half!  It will be fantastic when you are done.  I've done three and a full marathon.  Good luck!
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  • While we're sharing...I hate hate hate working out, but Nebb, you truly inspire me to go and work out and not be a lazy bum. So just know that when I don't feel like going, I think, "WWND" and that alone has gotten me to the gym twice this week.
  • My ex cheated on his girlfriend (now wife) with me before I met DH. I'm proud, she's a biitch.
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  • Brie, why would we judge you for that?  It's awesome that you love your body!  And from looking at your pictures, you look great, so love away!
  • Kati - Take care of yourself.  You are a beautiful woman.  I know it's easy for me to say, and not easy for you to believe, but it's absolutely 100% genuinely true.
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  • My H is also really awesome around the house.  I almost feel lazy sometimes because of everything he does...almost.  And my H compliments me pretty much everyday.  I'm going to go home and give him a hug.
  • Kati - Is this the first time you've admitted this to anyone (this time around)? You are very brave. Can we help?



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    Taco cat: Always a palindrome. ALWAYS, okay J&K?

    "cool......insult my size 2 body or my natural brown hair...or the fact that my parents own a country club, I have no budget for a wedding, and I have horses. I really dont care. Its better then having roots." ~ futurepivko
  • Kati, you need to get help. Bulimia will follow into your marriage and your marriage will most likely fail. My first one did. You can't love someone if you don't know how to love yourself. How many times a day are you throwing up?
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  • My boobs are very uneven and I hate hate hate it. I don't want FI to touch either of them or look at me. And I hate how my wedding dress, as well as pretty much all my clothes, look because of this. I am willing to go into debt to fix it. Me, too.  I'm extremely self conscious about it.  I consider every now and then getting it surgically fixed eventually...but then I don't want to seem "fake" and "vain" to my family members because I'm pretty sure it would be obvious what I did.  You  know what I mean?
  • FI and I both want to go to this really good school for our PhDs (different fields), and I kind of resent him because I have a much better chance at getting in than he does.  He has ADD, so he doesn't do well on standardized tests, and I know that's not his fault, but if I get in, and he doesn't, I'm going to harbor some major resentment, no matter how unhealthy I know it is.
  • Georgia that makes me smile :) thank you. WWND, I like that heh.
  • Oh, Kati, I am so sorry to hear that. :( I hope you can get the help you need.
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  • Vogt, I wish I could punch your brother in his stupid mean face.
  • Thanks, guys.  I wasn't fishing for compliments, but sometimes I feel like there's something wrong with me.  I'm 5'6" and about 163 pounds and I feel like I should want to fling myself off a bridge, but I don't.  Kati, salt, Rach--check out this link.  I [url]http://tinyurl.com/lecpwe[/url]
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  • Mariah- I know EXACTLY what you mean. Especially since there are so many good causes $5000+ could go to...
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  • Kati - Is this the first time you've admitted this to anyone (this time around)? You are very brave. Can we help?Thanks everyone, I know I need to go get help and I'm really close to being able to do so.  FI knows about it, it is impossible to hide it from him, and oddly I am pretty sure my mom knows too even though she is 1000s of miles away.  It's actually some of what FI and I have been fighting about because he can't really handle seeing me be this out of control with it (its the worst relapse I've had in the three years we've been together).  But he also loves going to places where we inevitably end up eating badly and I want him to be happy so I go along with it.  I secretly wish he would realize that this isn't helping and stop suggesting Chili's, etc.
  • Dear Beatles and tacocat... I love you. <3
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  • Smokey, thanks!  I've been training since July and the past month has been horrible.  I hurt my ankle, then I hurt my toe, then I got the flu...and Wednesday I hurt my ankle again.  I feel like the universe is against me!  Hopefully, everything will clear up and I'll be fine soon. I have dreams of running a full marathon though.  Maybe next year.  I figure if I can do a half, then I should be able to do a full eventually!
  • He also tells me I'm perfect when I biitch about being overweight.my H does too. granted, he's not a small dude either, but he really likes the way I look nekkid. I think he's sick, but whatever.
  • Kati, that made me sad.  I wish you knew how beautiful you are.
  • Kati, I'm very sorry to hear that. I don't know what internet strangers can do, but if there's anything, please holler.
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  • How many times a day are you throwing up?Just once a day, but it's back to almost every day.  Honestly if I wasn't with FI I wouldn't even care, but I do want to get help just because I would *hate* myself if it ended up seriously hurting our relationship.  I don't know why he even puts up with me at this point.Brie, that link is awesome!
  • Brie, don't be ashamed for feeling that way! You work so hard to be in shape, that's an awesome feeling!! GA - He's cool now, he knows he treated me like crap in high school but he was just an immature little brat and didn't know any better. He saw how my dad treated me and thought he was being funny. We joke about it now, and we're super close. He's basically my rock, since we're all the family each other has now (except my nephew, his son) - my dad's pretty much chosen his FI's family over us, and mom passed away a couple of years ago.
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  • It took me throwing up blood to say "Enough is enough"what is it going to take for you? "Almost there" can also mean death. You know, we all have relapses. I had a few this year. You can't throw your hands in the air say, "Oh well I fukced up, might as well not try anymore!" You have to keep trying to get better!
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