Wedding Etiquette Forum

What are your etiquette deal breakers?

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Re: What are your etiquette deal breakers?

  • Can't believe this is still going.
    Money dance, bridal party forced to do a silly dance routine or to pull random guests into a dance (experienced that one as an MOH. Only knew the bride and her parents, I nearly had a panic attack). As for tiered weddings: So what if you're invited to the party and not the ceremony? Think about budgets, venue capacity, and etiquette dictating that family is to be on the guest list first. The bride and groom want you to party with them and how many people actually remember the ceremony? Be happy you were invited. Cash bar? Be glad there's booze and if it ticks you off so much, don't drink. Going for a few drinks over full bar may seem a better choice, but in the end it's not up to you. And for all we as guests know, some family member may have insisted on a dollar dance or two hour ceremony or long gap and the happy couple agreed to avoid a huge scene. Be happy you were invited instead of the couples lack of etiquette or tacky choices. No one is forcing you to attend. (And can we lay off on getting thank you cards immediately? Guests have up to a year after the ceremony to give a gift. The receiver should have a little time to relax after the stress of paying for a wedding before stressing over thank you notes. Give it a month or three instead of a week or two before expecting one and if it takes more than six or seven, then get huffy.)

    Oh yeah, I should be thanking my lucky stars I get to attend such a speshul snowflake event. Thank you for your amazing advice.

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  • DaisyMaeMommyDaisyMaeMommy member
    5 Love Its First Comment Name Dropper First Anniversary
    edited May 2014
    ab6704a said:
    Reading some of the comments that his video is receiving... WOW. I can't even... Jeez.

    OH MY GOD


    Visit The Knot! Visit The Knot!
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  • ab6704a said:
    Reading some of the comments that his video is receiving... WOW. I can't even... Jeez.

    OH MY GOD


    You broke the first rule of Internetting... never read the comments.

    Why with the box?
    I always forget that rule and read the comments and then go...why the fuck did I read the comments? Its like one of the few life rules I should actually follow.
  • jseredajsereda member
    First Comment First Anniversary
    edited May 2014

    My fiancé’s sister is having her first child in June. Their mother is planning the baby's Christening the day before our wedding since the majority of their out of town family will be in town for our wedding!!! The worst part is my fiancé’s sister is also my MOH. I am literally stuck between a rock and a hard place. How do I speak up and say "NO! This is our wedding! Damn it, nothing else none wedding related is allowed to go on during this time!" And the worst part is, his mother keeps throwing wedding etiquette in my face. <?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" />

    Would it be bad "wedding etiquette" to un-invite the MOG?

  • Inkdancer said:
    ab6704a said:
    Reading some of the comments that his video is receiving... WOW. I can't even... Jeez.

    OH MY GOD


    You broke the first rule of Internetting... never read the comments.
    I was bored, and thought MAYBE they would be about cash bars being terrible.

    That's what I get for being an optimist.
    Visit The Knot! Visit The Knot!
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  • jsereda said:

    My fiancé’s sister is having her first child in June. Their mother is planning the baby's Christening the day before our wedding since the majority of their out of town family will be in town for our wedding!!! The worst part is my fiancé’s sister is also my MOH. I am literally stuck between a rock and a hard place. How do I speak up and say "NO! This is our wedding! Damn it, nothing else none wedding related is allowed to go on during this time!" And the worst part is, his mother keeps throwing wedding etiquette in my face.

    Would it be bad "wedding etiquette" to un-invite the MOG?

    You get the day of. Not the day before or the week leading up to, or even the day after. Day. Of. If it's a scheduling conflicting with a the rehearsal, talk to your FSIL. Otherwise, what's the problem?
  • ab6704aab6704a member
    5 Love Its First Anniversary Name Dropper First Comment
    edited May 2014
    Inkdancer said:
    ab6704a said:
    Reading some of the comments that his video is receiving... WOW. I can't even... Jeez.

    OH MY GOD


    You broke the first rule of Internetting... never read the comments.
    I was bored, and thought MAYBE they would be about cash bars being terrible.

    That's what I get for being an optimist


    Take heart in the fact that at least one of the biggest wedding industry lackeys understands....maybe, just maybe, the rest will follow.  But until that day happens, definitely don't read the comments!

    Edited to quote...
  • APDSS22APDSS22 member
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its First Answer
    ab6704a said:
    Inkdancer said:
    ab6704a said:
    Reading some of the comments that his video is receiving... WOW. I can't even... Jeez.

    OH MY GOD


    You broke the first rule of Internetting... never read the comments.
    I was bored, and thought MAYBE they would be about cash bars being terrible.

    That's what I get for being an optimist


    Take heart in the fact that at least one of the biggest wedding industry lackeys understands....maybe, just maybe, the rest will follow.  But until that day happens, definitely don't read the comments!

    Edited to quote...
    Oh goodness, I read the comments. 

    I was really emboldened by the fact that he didn't leave the special snowflakes an out.  "No cash bar....ever!"  Then pretty much all the comments are "OMG I'm not paying for people to get drunk!!!11!!!!" 

    *bangs head on keyboard*
  • jsereda said:

    My fiancé’s sister is having her first child in June. Their mother is planning the baby's Christening the day before our wedding since the majority of their out of town family will be in town for our wedding!!! The worst part is my fiancé’s sister is also my MOH. I am literally stuck between a rock and a hard place. How do I speak up and say "NO! This is our wedding! Damn it, nothing else none wedding related is allowed to go on during this time!" And the worst part is, his mother keeps throwing wedding etiquette in my face. <?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" />

    Would it be bad "wedding etiquette" to un-invite the MOG?


    Forget that, that's just plain rude and fucked up if you do that. Seriously, it's the day before your wedding. Are you really that self absorbed that you're worried about a BABY upstaging you the DAY BEFORE your wedding? Do you expect those who fly in the day before to sit with their thumbs up their asses so they're prepared for your day? You are incredibly out of line with this one.

    After 6 years and 2 boys, finally tying the knot on October 27th, 2013!

  • jsereda said:

    My fiancé’s sister is having her first child in June. Their mother is planning the baby's Christening the day before our wedding since the majority of their out of town family will be in town for our wedding!!! The worst part is my fiancé’s sister is also my MOH. I am literally stuck between a rock and a hard place. How do I speak up and say "NO! This is our wedding! Damn it, nothing else none wedding related is allowed to go on during this time!" And the worst part is, his mother keeps throwing wedding etiquette in my face.

    Would it be bad "wedding etiquette" to un-invite the MOG?


    Forget that, that's just plain rude and fucked up if you do that. Seriously, it's the day before your wedding. Are you really that self absorbed that you're worried about a BABY upstaging you the DAY BEFORE your wedding? Do you expect those who fly in the day before to sit with their thumbs up their asses so they're prepared for your day? You are incredibly out of line with this one.
    You know the next day all they're going to do is talking about that fucking baby and how cute it is and no one will notice her in her SUPER SPECIAL DRESS. On her SUPER SPECIAL DAY. 
  • jsereda said:



    My fiancé’s
    sister is having her first child in June. Their mother is planning the baby's
    Christening the day before our wedding since the majority of their out of town
    family will be in town for our wedding!!! The worst part is my fiancé’s sister
    is also my MOH. I am literally stuck between a rock and a hard place. How do I
    speak up and say "NO! This is our wedding! Damn it, nothing else none
    wedding related is allowed to go on during this time!" And the worst part
    is, his mother keeps throwing wedding etiquette in my face. <?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" />



    Would it be
    bad "wedding etiquette" to un-invite the MOG?



    Wow...I went to a wedding on my birthday and didn't have any if the thoughts you did.
    Your wedding, their child's Christening. It's not on the same day. Chill. Wanting to tell them all that is so selfish.
    And you wanted your fiance's sister as your MOH. Be her friend.


  • Money dance, bridal party forced to do a silly dance routine or to pull random guests into a dance (experienced that one as an MOH. Only knew the bride and her parents, I nearly had a panic attack).
    As for tiered weddings: So what if you're invited to the party and not the ceremony? Think about budgets, venue capacity, and etiquette dictating that family is to be on the guest list first. The bride and groom want you to party with them and how many people actually remember the ceremony? Be happy you were invited.
    Cash bar? Be glad there's booze and if it ticks you off so much, don't drink. Going for a few drinks over full bar may seem a better choice, but in the end it's not up to you.
    And for all we as guests know, some family member may have insisted on a dollar dance or two hour ceremony or long gap and the happy couple agreed to avoid a huge scene.
    Be happy you were invited instead of the couples lack of etiquette or tacky choices. No one is forcing you to attend.
    (And can we lay off on getting thank you cards immediately? Guests have up to a year after the ceremony to give a gift. The receiver should have a little time to relax after the stress of paying for a wedding before stressing over thank you notes. Give it a month or three instead of a week or two before expecting one and if it takes more than six or seven, then get huffy.)




    If you had read even 1 page you'd see why there are issues with everything you've said, starting with tiered weddings.




    Nice username, btw.

    I did read page 1. I read every page. And the only issue I see with what I've said is that many people seem easily offended by what they don't like. So explain it to me. Please. If it really is such an issue help me to understand it.
    And I like my username. My fiancé picked it. He thinks it's cute.
  • DaisyMaeMommyDaisyMaeMommy member
    5 Love Its First Comment Name Dropper First Anniversary
    edited May 2014



    Money dance, bridal party forced to do a silly dance routine or to pull random guests into a dance (experienced that one as an MOH. Only knew the bride and her parents, I nearly had a panic attack).
    As for tiered weddings: So what if you're invited to the party and not the ceremony? Think about budgets, venue capacity, and etiquette dictating that family is to be on the guest list first. The bride and groom want you to party with them and how many people actually remember the ceremony? Be happy you were invited.
    Cash bar? Be glad there's booze and if it ticks you off so much, don't drink. Going for a few drinks over full bar may seem a better choice, but in the end it's not up to you.
    And for all we as guests know, some family member may have insisted on a dollar dance or two hour ceremony or long gap and the happy couple agreed to avoid a huge scene.
    Be happy you were invited instead of the couples lack of etiquette or tacky choices. No one is forcing you to attend.
    (And can we lay off on getting thank you cards immediately? Guests have up to a year after the ceremony to give a gift. The receiver should have a little time to relax after the stress of paying for a wedding before stressing over thank you notes. Give it a month or three instead of a week or two before expecting one and if it takes more than six or seven, then get huffy.)




    If you had read even 1 page you'd see why there are issues with everything you've said, starting with tiered weddings.




    Nice username, btw.
    I did read page 1. I read every page. And the only issue I see with what I've said is that many people seem easily offended by what they don't like. So explain it to me. Please. If it really is such an issue help me to understand it.
    And I like my username. My fiancé picked it. He thinks it's cute.

    -------------

    He probably only said that because you're truly a monster and he wanted to walk away with his life.

    And there's nothing in this entire thread that people are "easily" offended by. They have stated things that are rude and some things that are completely disrespectful.

    Get with the program!
    Visit The Knot! Visit The Knot!
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  • Money dance, bridal party forced to do a silly dance routine or to pull random guests into a dance (experienced that one as an MOH. Only knew the bride and her parents, I nearly had a panic attack).
    As for tiered weddings: So what if you're invited to the party and not the ceremony? Think about budgets, venue capacity, and etiquette dictating that family is to be on the guest list first. The bride and groom want you to party with them and how many people actually remember the ceremony? Be happy you were invited.
    Cash bar? Be glad there's booze and if it ticks you off so much, don't drink. Going for a few drinks over full bar may seem a better choice, but in the end it's not up to you.
    And for all we as guests know, some family member may have insisted on a dollar dance or two hour ceremony or long gap and the happy couple agreed to avoid a huge scene.
    Be happy you were invited instead of the couples lack of etiquette or tacky choices. No one is forcing you to attend.
    (And can we lay off on getting thank you cards immediately? Guests have up to a year after the ceremony to give a gift. The receiver should have a little time to relax after the stress of paying for a wedding before stressing over thank you notes. Give it a month or three instead of a week or two before expecting one and if it takes more than six or seven, then get huffy.)




    If you had read even 1 page you'd see why there are issues with everything you've said, starting with tiered weddings.




    Nice username, btw.
    I did read page 1. I read every page. And the only issue I see with what I've said is that many people seem easily offended by what they don't like. So explain it to me. Please. If it really is such an issue help me to understand it.
    And I like my username. My fiancé picked it. He thinks it's cute.
    -------------

    He probably only said that because you're truly a monster and he wanted to walk away with his life.

    And there's nothing in this entire thread that people are "easily" offended by. They have stated things that are rude and some things that are completely disrespectful.

    Get with the program!

    I wasn't being sarcastic when I asked help understanding.
    And don't be such a bitch insinuating my fiancé is a coward. It's because I do monster makeup.
  • lyndausvi said:



    Money dance, bridal party forced to do a silly dance routine or to pull random guests into a dance (experienced that one as an MOH. Only knew the bride and her parents, I nearly had a panic attack).
    As for tiered weddings: So what if you're invited to the party and not the ceremony? Think about budgets, venue capacity, and etiquette dictating that family is to be on the guest list first. The bride and groom want you to party with them and how many people actually remember the ceremony? Be happy you were invited.
    Cash bar? Be glad there's booze and if it ticks you off so much, don't drink. Going for a few drinks over full bar may seem a better choice, but in the end it's not up to you.
    And for all we as guests know, some family member may have insisted on a dollar dance or two hour ceremony or long gap and the happy couple agreed to avoid a huge scene.
    Be happy you were invited instead of the couples lack of etiquette or tacky choices. No one is forcing you to attend.
    (And can we lay off on getting thank you cards immediately? Guests have up to a year after the ceremony to give a gift. The receiver should have a little time to relax after the stress of paying for a wedding before stressing over thank you notes. Give it a month or three instead of a week or two before expecting one and if it takes more than six or seven, then get huffy.)

    If you are so stressed over paying for a wedding to be able to write a thank you note you are doing something wrong.  Like really wrong.  

    Heck, if you are that stressed after the wedding I think you are doing something wrong.   Sex often relieves stress.  Maybe you should be doing more that?


    I take it you don't have a lot of stress in your life, but I do.
    And there are more important things than thank you notes.
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