Not trying, but not being as careful...

beethery

banana468 said:

banana468 said:

I reread what I stated and realized that the only possible way it could be interpreted was as holier than thou and insenstive. I do hope and pray that anyone in such a situation chooses life.

While I will always disagree with you on this topic, I respect the fuck out of you for saying the bolded. 

Thank you. I would love it if one day we agreed and in the meantime I will try not to be an asshole. Seriously.

This exchange is warming my heart and I don't like it.

ashley8918

beethery said:

banana468 said:

banana468 said:

I reread what I stated and realized that the only possible way it could be interpreted was as holier than thou and insenstive. I do hope and pray that anyone in such a situation chooses life.

While I will always disagree with you on this topic, I respect the fuck out of you for saying the bolded. 

Thank you. I would love it if one day we agreed and in the meantime I will try not to be an asshole. Seriously.

This exchange is warming my heart and I don't like it.

QUICK. Get you some black coffee for your black soul!

beethery

ashley8918 said:

beethery said:

banana468 said:

banana468 said:

I reread what I stated and realized that the only possible way it could be interpreted was as holier than thou and insenstive. I do hope and pray that anyone in such a situation chooses life.

While I will always disagree with you on this topic, I respect the fuck out of you for saying the bolded. 

Thank you. I would love it if one day we agreed and in the meantime I will try not to be an asshole. Seriously.

This exchange is warming my heart and I don't like it.

QUICK. Get you some black coffee for your black soul!

It didn't work.

hellohkb

I love all you beautiful lovelies. Seriously.

*

chibiyui

Oh Good. Puppies for everyone!

ohannabelle

.

banana468 said:

Yes, everyone has the right to believe what they want, and everyone has the right to say what they want.

I support those rights.

I also support adult intelligence and good judgment. Just because I have the right to say something doesn't mean it needs to be said.

My youngest has some socialization skill problems. An Autism spectrum disorder thing. I've had to spend a lot of time working with him on what should and should not be said, and what the results of our words can be.

Before he speaks, he stops and consciously asks himself, Is it kind? Is it helpful? Will it hurt anyone? and the bigass finale: Where will this lead? What will this accomplish? 

It's a good policy. Training him to think before he speaks, and consider what the results of his words are. 

So, @banana468- believing whatever you believe is fine. How you chose to express it isn't. Personal belief doesn't absolve people of the responsibility to be respectful and decent to other human beings with other belief systems. 

Was it helpful? 

Was it kind?

Were people hurt?

Where did it lead, and was anything accomplished?

If you publicly condemn and sanctimoniously judge other people as murderers, did you really think there's going to be positive result or reaction in any way? 

Nothing good was accomplished. You threw a controversial shitbomb into the room, and you're surprised that it stinks? 

You know what. You're right. I could have expressed myself and my beliefs better and my comments were insensitive. I apologize for that and to those I offended I am sorry. Especially to ashley who I can't imagine what you go through to make such a decision. It doesn't make my beliefs any different but they could have been stated in a better way.

I appreciate this, and absolutely accept your apology. That was kind of you. (I feel better.)

Inkdancer

Aww, and I was just about to put a great shush gif in this thread.

banana468

ohannabelle said:

.

banana468 said:

ohannabelle said:

Yes, everyone has the right to believe what they want, and everyone has the right to say what they want.

I support those rights.

I also support adult intelligence and good judgment. Just because I have the right to say something doesn't mean it needs to be said.

My youngest has some socialization skill problems. An Autism spectrum disorder thing. I've had to spend a lot of time working with him on what should and should not be said, and what the results of our words can be.

Before he speaks, he stops and consciously asks himself, Is it kind? Is it helpful? Will it hurt anyone? and the bigass finale: Where will this lead? What will this accomplish? 

It's a good policy. Training him to think before he speaks, and consider what the results of his words are. 

So, @banana468- believing whatever you believe is fine. How you chose to express it isn't. Personal belief doesn't absolve people of the responsibility to be respectful and decent to other human beings with other belief systems. 

Was it helpful? 

Was it kind?

Were people hurt?

Where did it lead, and was anything accomplished?

If you publicly condemn and sanctimoniously judge other people as murderers, did you really think there's going to be positive result or reaction in any way? 

Nothing good was accomplished. You threw a controversial shitbomb into the room, and you're surprised that it stinks? 

You know what. You're right. I could have expressed myself and my beliefs better and my comments were insensitive. I apologize for that and to those I offended I am sorry. Especially to ashley who I can't imagine what you go through to make such a decision.

It doesn't make my beliefs any different but they could have been stated in a better way.

I appreciate this, and absolutely accept your apology. That was kind of you. (I feel better.)

Thank you. As I said, I really do try to be kind. Instead, I was kind of an asshole.

I'm on my phone and can't post photos but I'll pour all of you some wine.

lyndausvi

ashley8918

banana468 said:

.

banana468 said:

Yes, everyone has the right to believe what they want, and everyone has the right to say what they want.

I support those rights.

I also support adult intelligence and good judgment. Just because I have the right to say something doesn't mean it needs to be said.

My youngest has some socialization skill problems. An Autism spectrum disorder thing. I've had to spend a lot of time working with him on what should and should not be said, and what the results of our words can be.

Before he speaks, he stops and consciously asks himself, Is it kind? Is it helpful? Will it hurt anyone? and the bigass finale: Where will this lead? What will this accomplish? 

It's a good policy. Training him to think before he speaks, and consider what the results of his words are. 

So, @banana468- believing whatever you believe is fine. How you chose to express it isn't. Personal belief doesn't absolve people of the responsibility to be respectful and decent to other human beings with other belief systems. 

Was it helpful? 

Was it kind?

Were people hurt?

Where did it lead, and was anything accomplished?

If you publicly condemn and sanctimoniously judge other people as murderers, did you really think there's going to be positive result or reaction in any way? 

Nothing good was accomplished. You threw a controversial shitbomb into the room, and you're surprised that it stinks? 

You know what. You're right. I could have expressed myself and my beliefs better and my comments were insensitive. I apologize for that and to those I offended I am sorry. Especially to ashley who I can't imagine what you go through to make such a decision. It doesn't make my beliefs any different but they could have been stated in a better way.

I appreciate this, and absolutely accept your apology. That was kind of you. (I feel better.)

Thank you. As I said, I really do try to be kind. Instead, I was kind of an asshole. I'm on my phone and can't post photos but I'll pour all of you some wine.

slothiegal

so I was away from TK all day and just got back now to about 200 new replies and all I can say....

THIS WAS A GODDAMNED ROLLER COASTER RIDE.

esstee33

ashley8918

larrygaga

hellohkb

slothiegal said:

so I was away from TK all day and just got back now to about 200 new replies and all I can say....

THIS WAS A GODDAMNED ROLLER COASTER RIDE.

I can't wait until the OP comes back and sees all this shit.

hellosweetie1015

hellohkb said:

so I was away from TK all day and just got back now to about 200 new replies and all I can say....

THIS WAS A GODDAMNED ROLLER COASTER RIDE.

I can't wait until the OP comes back and sees all this shit.

I keep thinking about this. Poor OP. 

lurkergirl

ashley8918 said:

Oh haaayyy girl

hellosweetie1015

@lurkergirl O.O I can't decide if that's cool or weird.

It's like when you're in between two mirrors and you want to watch both images at once to make sure they're doing the same things.

ashley8918

lurkergirl said:

Oh haaayyy girl

HAYYYYYYY!

ohannabelle

I would drink a glass to all of you, because you're all really honestly good people, in so many ways. But I have to go to the high school and watch the drama department present assorted scenes. Of course, the only worthwhile scene will be starring Moose, and the rest will be pure tedium.

I can't be the mom who shows up reeking of wine. 

(I also have terrible gas. I will just die if I fart in public. I'll have to sit next to a farty looking person, and give them the evil eye if anything squeaks out. Nobody ever suspects.) 

I don't want to go.

ShesSoCold

This thread was like a good rom-com/drama ish movie. Starts off innocent enough, shit gets a little deeper, shit hits all the fans and then a good happy ending. And vodka.

ashley8918

ohannabelle said:

I would drink a glass to all of you, because you're all really honestly good people, in so many ways. But I have to go to the high school and watch the drama department present assorted scenes. Of course, the only worthwhile scene will be starring Moose, and the rest will be pure tedium.

I can't be the mom who shows up reeking of wine. 

(I also have terrible gas. I will just die if I fart in public. I'll have to sit next to a farty looking person, and give them the evil eye if anything squeaks out. Nobody ever suspects.) 

I don't want to go.

I AM DYING, hahahahaha

dcbride86

amelisha said:

If you're not preventing (reliably), then you're trying, in my opinion, no matter what you're tcalling it.

This is what my doctor friend calls it, especially after seeing so many "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant" situations.  Either try to prevent it or try to have a baby,

JCbride2015

Wow, I'm glad I wasn't able to post earlier today and could only lurk on my phone during elevator rides at work.  Honestly I don't think my involvement would have helped calm things down at all.

So glad this ended on a happy note!  Margaritas?

ashley8918

JCbride2015 said:

Wow, I'm glad I wasn't able to post earlier today and could only lurk on my phone during elevator rides at work.  Honestly I don't think my involvement would have helped calm things down at all.

So glad this ended on a happy note!  Margaritas?

JCbride2015

ashley8918 said:

JCbride2015 said:

Wow, I'm glad I wasn't able to post earlier today and could only lurk on my phone during elevator rides at work.  Honestly I don't think my involvement would have helped calm things down at all.

So glad this ended on a happy note!  Margaritas?

OMG I'M WATCHING FRIENDS RIGHT NOW AND JUST POSTED ABOUT FRIENDS ARE YOU READING MY MIND?

ashley8918

JCbride2015 said:

ashley8918 said:

JCbride2015 said:

Wow, I'm glad I wasn't able to post earlier today and could only lurk on my phone during elevator rides at work.  Honestly I don't think my involvement would have helped calm things down at all.

So glad this ended on a happy note!  Margaritas?

OMG I'M WATCHING FRIENDS RIGHT NOW AND JUST POSTED ABOUT FRIENDS ARE YOU READING MY MIND?

This is some insane woowoo shit becasue SO AM I.

MrsAitch

I actually think many of the pro-choicers on this thread need to apologize too. Guacamole and Banana were called many names too and one person called the Bible "some crazy book," which I think we can all agree is highly offensive. The mean-spirited arguing was coming from both sides in this thread.

To bring this topic back to the original discussion, I love how the same people who are all "get out of my uterus, what I do with it is MY choice" think people who use NFP or withdrawal are clearly TTC and are telling people who use those methods that they NEED to use something else. I'm sorry, but it's their uterus and their choice.

Lastly, some of you really should consider reading Taking Charge of Your Fertility and learning more in general about your bodies. The chances of a woman becoming pregnant outside of her fertile window aren't just slim, they're next to zero. The reason the Fertility Awareness Method doesn't work as well as it would with perfect use is that humans make errors and women think they are outside of their fertile window when they aren't. With perfect use, FAM is nearly as effective as the Pill. Especially if it's been a few days since ovulation, pregnancy is pretty much impossible. The people who are most conservative about FAM generally wait to have "unprotected" intercourse until a few days after ovulation. Some even use OPKs to be sure. If you want to see people who use this method successfully--some of whom are childfree and have been using FAM for decades, go to tcoyf.com and check out the forums there.

You should also know that while withdrawal obviously isn't the world's best form of birth control, it isn't as horrible as you were taught in school. Laci Green did an excellent you tube video about it if you'd like to learn more. It's something like 85% effective, which certainly isn't bad.

Also, you're fine to drink a little while you're TTC and during the "two week wait" (time between ovulation and missed period when you can get a positive pregnancy test) as the fetus/zygote/baby (I'm not sure what the scientific term is for where it is at this stage) isn't actually feeding off of your blood stream yet. Implantation doesn't occur until something like 10 days post ovulation, so the fertilized egg is just floating around your fallopian tubes/uterus then and won't be effected by alcohol.

I'm not saying everyone should start charting and tracking, but it's actually really easy and it's nice to know what's going on with your body. There are lots of free smart phone apps to help you out, and you'll usually know exactly what day your period will arrive, which is just plain convenient. The reason a lot of people also chart is because they don't want to or aren't able to just have intercourse daily until they become pregnant. Some argue that this doesn't give the male's body adequate time to produce enough sperm and so trying every other day might be a better method. Also, if you're having trouble conceiving and want to conceive, it's always worth trying! And a lot of doctors will see you about infertility treatments a lot sooner if you can show them a few months worth of charts.

lurkergirl

Oh please. Why the FUCK would you resurrect this?

ashley8918

lurkergirl said:

Oh please. Why the FUCK would you resurrect this?

Honestly. Good god.